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Maybe this is arrogance of an old man

  1. #1
    ardianto's Avatar Full Member
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    Maybe this is arrogance of an old man

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    Assalamualaikum.

    In one thread I mentioned that I have Youtube channel that special for railway videos. But although my videos considered halal, no inappropriate picture and even no music, I can't post my video here because through that video someone here can enter my channel and see me.

    Yes, I use my photo as profile picture. But with reason that very different than other people. I just want the youths who watch my video know that I am not youth, but 50's age man. So they must call me "sir", not "bro" when make a comment.

    Since I was little kid I have been taught that I must call someone according to the age. If he was few years older I must call "older brother", if he was old I must call him "sir". Later after I grown older, the youths called me "uncle" , and now they call me "sir".

    But not everyone in internet can see me. So, many youths call me "bro" because they assume I am a youth too. To be honest, sometime I feel uncomfortable with it, although in another hand I think "What happen with me?. Why must I felt offended when a youth call me Bro?"

    I don't know, is it because the etiquette of calling someone that taught to me when I was kid?, or it actually is arrogance of an old man?. Maybe this is arrogance of an old man. And arrogance is not good, of course. So I must eliminate it.

    Okay, to the youths in Islamicboard forum. You can call me with bro, uncle, sir, or whatever you like. Don't worry, I will not offended. But when you call other old men, especially from Eastern culture, it's better if you use "uncle" or "sir", because maybe they are not same like me.

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    azc's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Maybe this is arrogance of an old man



    No, it's not your arrogance, rather the matter of your principles based on the teachings of your parents for socializing and interacting with others.

    However, from Islamic point of view all of us are brothers in Islam.

    Narrated `Abdullah bin `Umar :
    Allah's Messenger ‏‎ said, "A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim, so he should not oppress him, nor should he hand him over to an oppressor. Whoever fulfilled the needs of his brother, Allah will fulfill his needs; whoever brought his )Muslim( brother out of a discomfort, Allah will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever screened a Muslim, Allah will screen him on the Day of Resurrection . "

    حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ بُكَيْرٍ، حَدَّثَنَا اللَّيْثُ، عَنْ عُقَيْلٍ، عَنِ ابْنِ شِهَابٍ، أَنَّ سَالِمًا، أَخْبَرَهُ أَنَّ عَبْدَ اللَّهِ بْنَ عُمَرَ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ أَخْبَرَهُ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏"‏ الْمُسْلِمُ أَخُو الْمُسْلِمِ، لاَ يَظْلِمُهُ وَلاَ يُسْلِمُهُ، وَمَنْ كَانَ فِي حَاجَةِ أَخِيهِ كَانَ اللَّهُ فِي حَاجَتِهِ، وَمَنْ فَرَّجَ عَنْ مُسْلِمٍ كُرْبَةً فَرَّجَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ كُرْبَةً مِنْ كُرُبَاتِ يَوْمِ الْقِيَامَةِ، وَمَنْ سَتَرَ مُسْلِمًا سَتَرَهُ اللَّهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ ‏"‏‏.‏
    Reference: Sahih al-Bukhari 2442
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    Re: Maybe this is arrogance of an old man

    format_quote Originally Posted by azc View Post


    No, it's not your arrogance, rather the matter of your principles based on the teachings of your parents for socializing and interacting with others.

    However, from Islamic point of view all of us are brothers in Islam.

    Narrated `Abdullah bin `Umar :
    Allah's Messenger ‏‎ said, "A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim, so he should not oppress him, nor should he hand him over to an oppressor. Whoever fulfilled the needs of his brother, Allah will fulfill his needs; whoever brought his )Muslim( brother out of a discomfort, Allah will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever screened a Muslim, Allah will screen him on the Day of Resurrection . "

    حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ بُكَيْرٍ، حَدَّثَنَا اللَّيْثُ، عَنْ عُقَيْلٍ، عَنِ ابْنِ شِهَابٍ، أَنَّ سَالِمًا، أَخْبَرَهُ أَنَّ عَبْدَ اللَّهِ بْنَ عُمَرَ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ أَخْبَرَهُ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ ‏"‏ الْمُسْلِمُ أَخُو الْمُسْلِمِ، لاَ يَظْلِمُهُ وَلاَ يُسْلِمُهُ، وَمَنْ كَانَ فِي حَاجَةِ أَخِيهِ كَانَ اللَّهُ فِي حَاجَتِهِ، وَمَنْ فَرَّجَ عَنْ مُسْلِمٍ كُرْبَةً فَرَّجَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ كُرْبَةً مِنْ كُرُبَاتِ يَوْمِ الْقِيَامَةِ، وَمَنْ سَتَرَ مُسْلِمًا سَتَرَهُ اللَّهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ ‏"‏‏.‏
    Reference: Sahih al-Bukhari 2442
    Jazak Allah Khayr, brother.

    Brotherhood, whether religious based or ethnicity based, does not recognize age. But social relationship in many cultures regard age as factor that must be considered. I come from culture that very conservative in communication. Even the way of talking toward older people is not really same as the way of talking to people in same age.

    Maybe I am too affected by custom in my place. Or maybe because I am in old generation that shocked with progress of culture. From what I have noticed, culture of youth nowadays is not really same as when I was young.

    By the way, about how to call someone. I remember, in story about Camel War I found that Ali ibn Abu Thalib r.a called Aisha r.a with "mother". Maybe because Aisha r.a was Ali r.a mother in-law. So now I am curious about Islamic ethic in calling someone.
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    azc's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Maybe this is arrogance of an old man

    format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto View Post
    Jazak Allah Khayr, brother.

    Brotherhood, whether religious based or ethnicity based, does not recognize age. But social relationship in many cultures regard age as factor that must be considered. I come from culture that very conservative in communication. Even the way of talking toward older people is not really same as the way of talking to people in same age.

    Maybe I am too affected by custom in my place. Or maybe because I am in old generation that shocked with progress of culture. From what I have noticed, culture of youth nowadays is not really same as when I was young.

    By the way, about how to call someone. I remember, in story about Camel War I found that Ali ibn Abu Thalib r.a called Aisha r.a with "mother". Maybe because Aisha r.a was Ali r.a mother in-law. So now I am curious about Islamic ethic in calling someone.
    I'm also raised in almost similar culture. I salute you and your social values for keeping them intact. These precious social values are dying now.

    I think bro @Eric H is another perfect example who represents the old and rare social values.

    Hz A'isha is the mother of all Muslims, this is why Hz Ali addressed her as mother.

    Since Hz Fatima had already died when this battle was fought, so she was no more his mother in law.
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