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  1. #1
    SintoDinto's Avatar
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    How do I feel empathy and pray for others again?

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    I used to pray for others a great deal. Immensely. But back then I was suffering a great deal, and I had low iman. But then came a point where I started to see everything as coming from the qadr of Allah, and I also saw some of my prayers being accepted and knew some of them would be accepted in due time (or not....*gulps* or not haha) and I either gained hope, POSSIBLY despaired in some cases or all cases, or both. So if I heard that some brother or sister or a non muslim was sick I would just think "khair, inshaAllah" "it'll cleanse them of their sins and if they have no sins it'll raise them in their rank," "I've had bigger troubles who am i to relate" people's problems either felt larger than life, or not worth my time, or larger than life but having wisdom. i also ran into the trouble of praying for too many people all at once, and i had severe waswasa, so I ran into compassion fatigue. nowadays the only thing ill ask allah is an occasional odd thing, an occassional serious thing, and an occasional prayer for uplifting of iman and taqwa, and im starting to think the odd things and the guidance is more frequent because i never want anything.

    what has been your experiences? what am i experiencing?

    EDIT: I also think I may have seasonal affective disorder.
    Last edited by SintoDinto; 03-08-2019 at 02:25 AM.

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    ardianto's Avatar
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    Re: How do I feel empathy and pray for others again?

    Empathy is a form of love that comes from the heart, not from the mind. So you will not be able to force your mind to feel empathy.

    You will have this kind of love if you are always grateful for what Allah has given you, and you are with people who suffer, but always try to steadfast and smile. When you are with them, that's the time when you will feel the encouragement from your heart to pray for them.
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  4. #3
    AbdurRahman.'s Avatar
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    Re: How do I feel empathy and pray for others again?

    A hadith says 'if you can't cry in supplication, pretend to cry'

    That hadith indicates that a more taqwa filled humane nature takes time to develop... and we must keep on with our good acts despite the lack of emotions...

    We don't have to feel the empathy to pray for others; feeling the empathy is not a condition for praying for others

    We can pray for them anyway and if we keep to our good actions and stay away from sins then empathy and other soft hearted emotions will come naturally all in good time.

    In regards to thinking of their suffering as khair as they'll get rewarded etc, we should want for others what we want for ourselves. If we were inflicted would we pray for mercy or would we be ok with it?

    Also Allah treats people according to the way they are. If they have mercy and compassion for others, Allah will have mercy and compassion for them.

    If we want justice for others (thinking they deserved it from Allah so let it be) then that's what we'll get on day of Judgement; justice and not mercy

    If we think, justice or suffering is ultimately good for them and don't pray for alleviation of their suffering, then we just may get hell-fire for our sins as that will be ultimately khair and purging for us!

    So it's essential to always want mercy and ease for others.
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  5. #4
    Eric H's Avatar
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    Re: How do I feel empathy and pray for others again?

    Greetings and peace be with you SintoDinto;
    When we pray for someone, should we leave everything to Allah, or should we strive to be a part of the solution if we can?
    Blessings,
    Eric
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    How do I feel empathy and pray for others again?

    You will never look into the eyes of anyone who does not matter to God.


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