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  1. #1
    lildurkotf's Avatar
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    Things with opposite gender

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    Salaam

    I have lot of friends and know a lot of people who can’t seem to overlook someone’s past and want to marry someone who hasn’t done anything sexual with the opposite gender, nowadays it’s hard to find someone that isn’t.

    I want to know Is there any Hadith or stories in Islam where a virgin guy has married a lady who isn’t a virgin.

    As I think many people need to understand this

    Jzk

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    AabiruSabeel's Avatar
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    Re: Things with opposite gender



    It is not very difficult to find someone who has not done anything unchaste. That is a very generalized statement. You have to look in the proper place and maybe change your friends or the community you stay with.

    Allah says,

    Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honourable. [Surah Noor: 26]

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    'Abdullah's Avatar
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    Re: Things with opposite gender

    Quote Originally Posted by lildurkotf View Post
    Salaam

    I have lot of friends and know a lot of people who can’t seem to overlook someone’s past and want to marry someone who hasn’t done anything sexual with the opposite gender, nowadays it’s hard to find someone that isn’t.

    I want to know Is there any Hadith or stories in Islam where a virgin guy has married a lady who isn’t a virgin.

    As I think many people need to understand this

    Jzk
    Wa-Alaikum Assalam Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu,

    If someone has repented and his/her actions do show that they have changed then there is no need to ask about one's past & marriage is halal by all means. Many reverts marry good practricing Muslims even though they may have been in haram relationships before they reverted to Islam. However, if it is clear that one is in haram relationships and feel proud about it then a true believer will not want to marry such an individual. I hope that makes sense.

    And there are many good practicing Muslims who don't get into haram relationships. Easy way to find them is start going to your local mosque, connect with the Muslims who come to mosque on regular basis. Ask your local Imam that you are interested to marry with a practicing Muslimah & hopefully you can find a right partner through your local community.

    Ma'aSalaam

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    'Abdullah's Avatar
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    Re: Things with opposite gender

    Quote Originally Posted by AabiruSabeel View Post


    It is not very difficult to find someone who has not done anything unchaste. That is a very generalized statement. You have to look in the proper place and maybe change your friends or the community you stay with.

    Allah says,

    Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honourable. [Surah Noor: 26]

    Wa-Alaikum Assalam Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu,

    The mufassireen differed concerning the interpretation/meaning of the verse you have quoted. There are three interpretations one can find after reading tafsir from different scholars:
    First Opinion (Majority of the scholars): Some of them said that it refers to bad and good words, so the meaning of the verse is: Evil words are for evil men, and evil people are for evil words, and good words are for good people, and good people are for good words.
    Second Opinion: Others said that it refers to evil and good actions. So the meaning of the verse is: Evil actions are for evil men, and evil people are for evil actions, and good actions are for good people, and good people are for good actions.
    Third Opinion: The third opinion concerning this verse is that evil and good refer to people with regard to marriage. So the meaning of the verse is: evil women are for evil men, and evil men are for evil women, and good women are for good men, and good men are for good women.

    I think the first and second interpretation of this verse makes more sense. The third opinion which has some problems such as:

    1. Asiyah the wife of Pharaoh
    2. Wife of Prophet Lut (peace be upon him)
    3. Wife of Prophet Noah (Peace be upon him)
    4. Even we see in our own life experience that many righteous people end up having bad spouses. Does it mean that we should question the faith and character of righteous people? I don't think that is a right way to judge.


    Quoting Tafsir from Ibn Kathir below which supports the first opinion mentioned above:


    الْخَبِيثَـتُ لِلْخَبِيثِينَ وَالْخَبِيثُونَ لِلْخَبِيثَـتِ وَالطَّيِّبَـتُ لِلطَّيِّبِينَ وَالطَّيِّبُونَ لِلْطَّيِّبَـتِ أُوْلَـئِكَ مُبَرَّءُونَ مِمَّا يَقُولُونَ لَهُم مَّغْفِرَةٌ وَرِزْقٌ كَرِيمٌ

    Bad statements are for bad people and bad people for bad statements. Good statements are for good people and good people for good statements: such are innocent of (every) bad statement which they say; for them is forgiveness, and honored provision.
    Ibn `Abbas said, "Evil words are for evil men, and evil men are for evil words; good words are for good men and good men are for good words. This was revealed concerning `A'ishah and the people of the slander.'' This was also narrated from Mujahid, `Ata', Sa`id bin Jubayr, Ash-Sha`bi, Al-Hasan bin Abu Al-Hasan Al-Basri, Habib bin Abi Thabit and Ad-Dahhak, and it was also the view favored by Ibn Jarir. He interpreted it to mean that evil speech is more suited to evil people, and good speech is more suited to good people. What the hypocrites attributed to `A'ishah was more suited to them, and she was most suited to innocence and having nothing to do with them.
    Allah said:
    أُوْلَـئِكَ مُبَرَّءُونَ مِمَّا يَقُولُونَ
    Such (good people) are innocent of (every) bad statement which they say. This means, they are remote from what the people of slander and enmity say.
    لَهُم مَّغْفِرَةٌ

    (for them is forgiveness,) means, because of the lies that were told about them,
    وَرِزْقٌ كَرِيمٌ
    (and honored provision.) meaning, with Allah in the Gardens of Delight. This implies a promise that she will be the wife of the Messenger of Allah in Paradise.

    And Allah knows the best!
    Ma'aSalaam

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    lildurkotf's Avatar
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    Re: Things with opposite gender

    Jzk everyone for their replies


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