Turkish relatives, mother, prioritizing uni degree over marriage, everything..

**SintoDinto** · 09-06-2022

Especially my grandparents on my father's side, who they themselves are not even elementary school graduates, who claim I can not be a man without a degree, and when I try getting careers through various other means and explain how things work in america they shut me down or hang up on me or shout in my face. my mother paid for this semester and I dropped one class due to difficulty and is demanding i finish this semester before trying anything else, and anything else i do she is not paying for. dad is out of the picture. brother wants me to finish my degree. im currently enrolled in a two year program in computers. i already have a degree but its useless because its a pathway to another degree, a 4 year degree, basically core curriculum. my relatives hate that i keep changing interest and my mom tries to dominate everything and be controlling. i now want to be a non degree earning translator or interpreter, perhaps in a hospital. ive wanted it before and ive wanted it for some time and ive enjoyed learning about foreign languages, as well as interpreting. i once dreamt of being a simultaneous interpreter until my mother shattered my dreams. help?

**wealthbuilder** · 09-07-2022

Originally Posted by SintoDinto

Especially my grandparents on my father's side, who they themselves are not even elementary school graduates, who claim I can not be a man without a degree, and when I try getting careers through various other means and explain how things work in america they shut me down or hang up on me or shout in my face. my mother paid for this semester and I dropped one class due to difficulty and is demanding i finish this semester before trying anything else, and anything else i do she is not paying for. dad is out of the picture. brother wants me to finish my degree. im currently enrolled in a two year program in computers. i already have a degree but its useless because its a pathway to another degree, a 4 year degree, basically core curriculum. my relatives hate that i keep changing interest and my mom tries to dominate everything and be controlling. i now want to be a non degree earning translator or interpreter, perhaps in a hospital. ive wanted it before and ive wanted it for some time and ive enjoyed learning about foreign languages, as well as interpreting. i once dreamt of being a simultaneous interpreter until my mother shattered my dreams. help?

Assalamualaikum

First you need to understand that job is not a hobby. It is a responsibility. You should take it responsibly for the sake of family as you have to feed them. And you should take it responsibly for the company as the company is paying you for that. There is no question of what interests you or not. Yes, doing a job which keeps you happy and satisfied is important.

So stop thinking about finding a job of your choice and focus on either getting a degree or do a job which you are in comfortable right now and start earning. Only then, you can think about marriage. Because, your father money is not your money once you grow up. Taking care of your wife and children is your responsibility. So you should earn.

Once you start earning and got married. You can study the subjects of your choice and try to get job in that field. Your mother don't have the power to shatter your dreams, unless you have given her that opportunity. Be responsible for your own actions and do not blame others.