i feel yesterday (the 26th) was lailatul qadr. i duno. but i've stayed up all nights of all the last ten days of ramadan...and made dua, never felt anything until yesterday. and at fitar the sky was soo cuuute and different.
but anyways..
i am horrible at explaining my feelings so im just gonna do what i always do to explain my "status" in faith and my feelings of life...
mY Life
This is how i was back before,
it was all bout life and music i adore
i never knew deen, or wat the grave had to pour
until allah guided me and i learned life war
the horror of the grave and the faces it tore
the snake that hits a body down to earths core
the blood, regret, and shame on the floor
tge pain, blood rain, body split to four
when u say u had enough theres a million more
i read the story bout a boy
and when death knocked at his door
he tried his best to escape it but he was no more
the shaitan ruins your life, tempts u to do it
but in the end whats life? you'll have to forget it
now i may seem i am perfect, but really i aint worth it
i struggle in a quest, the quest to win it
i wanna get my deen and everything within it
i'll beat my struggle with the songs
i'll gain my deen and fix my wrongs
inshallah i say, inshallah it be
but i cant do it alone, i need u wit me
yeh, im callin u allah, im turning to u
im sorry for the delay and the times i doubt u
the shaitan won a few battles but am still wit u
i may have lost hope but i've always loved u
i thought u ignored me, but if only i knew
you dont ignore anyone, now i know thats true
im afraid its too late, if it is its up to u
wether u let me restart or make me drink brew
i dont know when my time is, when my body is due
but whenever it is, im ready thanks to u
if you'll just forgive me, because im full of regret
and i wil forever worship u , its u i wont forget
...
sorry i cant finish...
i decide to see what i've been missing, i open up abu ali - ibtidi bil hamdi lilah
and i start feeling soo bad of what i was listening to before.
i made dua to allah that he can help me quit music forever, and on top of that, he made me quit music, and see it disgusting, i cannot believe what i used to listen to , i hate it with all my heart now, and its only been from today, yesterday i found it interesting, today i find it disgusting, and i fforgot every single word of every single haram song i used to like.
and now that i se allah helped me, im full of shame from the doubt i used to have, this was one of the manyt things i made dua for... inshallah the rest are answered too.
i feel so bad, but i feel my emaan is very high suddenly, i feel allah loves me and i feel punishment of grave is avoided. and this morning i feel like i kno more quran than before, i did make dua for allah to help me become a complete hafith before i die, and now i remember every surah i used to know, then i forgot, but now i remember them all without reviewing.
my eyes are full of tears or regret, tears of shame, tears of faith.
i have made dua for u all for helping me, dua for everyone specifically, name by name, took forever tho but it was worth it, even for those who didnt help me, because if it wastnt for any of u i would still be a useless slave of allah with no faith...
Aww subhanAllah fishter *hugs* that was a beautiful post and amazing poem lil sis. When your sins prick your conscience and when you know that the love of Allah/Islam and love for music cannot exist in one heart at the same time, know then that you are on the road to recovery, to gaining Allah's forgiveness and being under the shade of His mercy. Bi'ithnillah.
I pray Allah makes things easy for you, may He increase you in 'Ilm and Taqwa and may He bless you in abundance hun. Ameen!
Aww this was beauuutiful MashaAllah, it made my imaan spark for a minute
This is the True Truemuslim
Ameeen at the above dua's^^ May Allah Accept all your dua's
And as for the onewho fears standing in front of His Lord and restrainsthe soul from impure evil desires and lusts, verily, Paradise will be his abode [79:40-41]
wallahi reading that made me cry. it made me think that thinks can be sorted out and to never lose hope in Allah SWT.
aww i soo dont know what to say but lets just say that am still walking up the to the straight path, a path that is sooo long and that i am finiding it really hard sometimes to walk throught it.
Three simple rules in life:
1) If you do not go after what you want, you will never have it
2) If you don't ask, the answer will always be no.
3) If you do not step forward, you'll always be in the same place
" Its sometimes better people don't get to know you..
Cuz the more they know you, the less they understand & accept you..
Alone is better, what say " - SRK
Should I seek a source of law other than God, when it is He Who has sent down unto you the Book (Qur'an) fully explained? And those whom We have given them the Book know that it has been sent down from the Lord with truth, so be not of those in doubt.
You are special kind of person, and very sensible. Mercy of Allah is on you! How i see you have big heart(only Allah knows). Be ready for new battles against devil. Devil will use all to stop you, he will attack persons around you trying to use them against you.
You have our Allah and we, slaves of Him will pray for you. Look! I dont know who are you but I will pray for you! That is islam. I recomend to you:
avoid "pressure of rules of islam". step by step. Find good muslims friends, nobody can make alone. Read about life of Muhammed a.s. In this time, muslims sometime could dissapointed us. Be ready. Allah never abandon you. I wish you to be happy, and -tomorow, i want you see like muslim who teach others and help them. Read! We need you!
this really hit home, every word you wrote i could hear myself saying it, Allah only knows how many times I've thought some of the stuff you said, and reading this just made me realise how vulnerable we all are to giving up when the road becomes too tough...
We all need You, ya Allah, we need you to make us stronger in our faith, we need you to guide us but most of all, we need your mercy. Ameen.
well done sweetheart, i loved your poem.It said everything you felt, and trust me we can all relate to it in some way.keep going and ont give up, we are all here for you!!!
My heart, so precious,
I won't trade for a hundred thousand souls.
Your one smile takes it for free.Rumi
Yehh i can finally agree with my name (truemuslim)
without at all feelin no shame. (rhymed )
ANd wherever the shaitan gonna mess wit me, im not gonna turn it to allah, im gonna to myself to allah, any doubt i got from now, its only doubt from the shaitan.
its just the music. i never ever feel like listening to it, even my (former) favorite song!! My brother turned it on and it sounded like someone crying! horrible!
its just my brother keeps odwnloading songs back to the folder i emptied, and says" look at this song, remember it?" . he downlaods them for me. not knowing i dont like em no more. yeh i do tell him its haram but he doesnt even believe me (since its me and not allah himself)
it shows like you got imaan, keep it up, like remember its a struggle, and the thin that i think is wicked, is that your doin it for music, like many people think music, thats minor! but if we treated all sins as major then we will be sorted! bless ya sister
Jaa-Ro-Nee-Mo!!!
"they ask you when will the help of Allah (swt) come! Certainly Allah (Swt) help is always near"
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subhana Allah, beautiful masha Allah. may Allah keep u steadfast, Allahomma ameen.
★truemuslim- My Lyf (Allah ♥, and music ♬)
Wallah i'm so happy for u
well done sweetheart, i loved your poem.It said everything you felt, and trust me we can all relate to it in some way.keep going and ont give up, we are all here for you!!!
Its wiked x
)
horrible!
not knowing i dont like em no more. yeh i do tell him its haram but he doesnt even believe me
(since its me and not allah himself)
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