I talk little (unless it's something that I have a strong opinion about... And those things are very few). This morning, at the bus stop, a random lady began talking to me... And all I could think about whilst smiling in a 'the-world-is-beautiful' way was the fact that she was a stranger and that she musn't initiate a conversation with me unless I feel the need to do so. Yes, I'm very... Selfish?
Anyway... I appreciate the silence between a stranger and myself. But whilst walking back after school, I was with a friend, and since I hardly initiate conversations, our journey consisted mostly of silence and her poor attempts at conversation. And, of course, it was uncomfortable. For me, who knew I made her uncomfortable... And her, who didn't appreciate the awkward silence. That made me wonder about the saying that a friend is someone with whom you sit in silence but feel like you've talked a lot. (Or something like that)
And my conclusion: it's bull.
My conclusion was based on several experiences with friends I've known for several years (10) and friends I known recently (2).
All I want is to find out if I'm right. Well, for majority of the people anyway.
Do I not make sense? Vote anyway.
NB: You may ignore the third option on the poll. It was another of my odd-number obsession thing. But of course, I kept the members hidden, just in case one of you might feel obliged to be honest and admit...
well, when you finish talking, ie. nothing left to talk about take a break and do something else. It bothers me when people try to break the silence for the sake of it, not that I'm not talkative at times
Silences are good, because when you're talking, you start back-biting without even realizing it (has happened so many times, Astaghfirullah). I stopped talking when I realized that people use everything you say against you, one time or another. The best way to have a conversation, imo, is to keep the talking on to the next person. Like ask the person constant questions, even if you have 0 interest in the answers. "How's school? Did you finish *** assignment? How is your sister/mother? What did you have for breakfast (this might seem too obvious, but really, people can go on about breakfast for so long, it's surprising)?" Works every time, Insha Allah. <3
* ~ "To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return" ~ *
"All things fear a person who fears Allah, while everything is a source of fear to him who fears somebody other than Allah."
^^ I do that. Foot-in-mouth disease is what I seem to suffer from.
I think I must've freaked a fair few people out.
(Oh, I wouldn't initiate a conversation with a dude in an elevator though..I'll only talk to a person who I see all the time in the lift who's a girl and who I don't really know)
I initially voted Silence between yourself and a friend, but having some thought about this, I change my mind.
I think if you pay attention, with a close, "real", if you like, friend/family member, silence could go on for millenia and none of you could care. I reminisced to times of silence between me and family members and [alhamdulillah (?)], it didn't seem to be of much bother. But when I think of "friends" who are perhaps, not that close to me, there is a tension and an itching obligation to speak and say something just for the sake of keeping the title of 'friend'.
Understood?
Should I seek a source of law other than God, when it is He Who has sent down unto you the Book (Qur'an) fully explained? And those whom We have given them the Book know that it has been sent down from the Lord with truth, so be not of those in doubt.
The most awkward silence for me is when I'm with family rather than friends, specifically in a family gathering type of context. You know, after the meet and greet, and everyone has sat down and then before the momentum of discussion really gets going, there's this tumbleweed of nothingness? Hate it.
format_quote Originally Posted by AntiKarateKid
No silence is as awkward as the silence on an elevator.
In such situations, I take it you enjoy the punctuation of a fart?
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I hate it, I've even gotten out before reaching the correct floor because teh silence was deafening.
stuff like that usually breaks the ice
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