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  1. #1
    Who Am I?'s Avatar
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    Well that sucked...

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    ... like a giant vacuum.

    I just had a rather heated argument with a Christian friend of mine. I told him I was considering Islam and was studying the Qu'ran and he immediately got all defensive.

    "I'd stay away from that if I were you. They're going to deport you as a terrorist." etc.

    We're not really talking anymore now because of it...

    If he's like that, I wonder what my family is going to think if and when I tell them...

    I need a drink...

    Sorry, I just had to vent. You don't have to respond. I'm not looking for any sympathy here.

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    Ğħαrєєвαħ's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Assalaamu Alaaykum - Peace be unto you

    Indeed..i will not try to sympatize but i will try advice insha'Allaah-God Willingly

    Many reverts have gone through this, actually everyone does once in their life time, or many times..

    You dont have to inform your parents right away, as time passes when they see changes in you hopefully then you can tell them that is because you are muslim..muslim meaning submitter to God, follower of the teachings of Jesus (pbuh) and the final messenger Muhammad (pbuh)..

    I hope it didnt seem like i was sympatising..but i hope you recieve some advice insha'Allaah

    .. peace ..
    Well that sucked...

    "Allah! La ilaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He), Al-Hayyul-Qayyum (the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists).".."[Al Qur'aan 3:2]

  4. #3
    Flame of Hope's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Just a Guy View Post
    If he's like that, I wonder what my family is going to think if and when I tell them...
    My family became hostile and mean towards me. My mother launched a vicious campaign against me, forbidding my relatives to come to my aid in any way. My husband's family holds me responsible for "destroying" my husband's life. My father-in-law hasn't hesitated to blame me if anything went wrong. I've been made fun of and mocked at. My sister is no longer in talking terms with me. My brother isn't interested in maintaining relations with me either.

    So yeah........ it's going to be a bumpy ride ahead. It isn't going to be a bed of roses. It hasn't been so for me..... but I LOVE the challenge, the hardships and the difficulties. I'll face anything for Allah, The Most High! And with a smile too. lol.
    Well that sucked...


    It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.


  5. #4
    Dagless's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    I wouldn't worry too much, in fact it would be surprising if you didn't come across any intolerant people. Insha'Allah the next one you tell will be one of the supportive ones.
    | Likes جوري liked this post
    Well that sucked...


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    Perseveranze's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Peace,

    Kind of sad he said that, I am sure thats not what Jesus Christ(pbuh) taught. He has alot of ignorance and from the looks of it, hatred for Islam. May he be guided rightouesly.
    Well that sucked...

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  8. #6
    GuestFellow's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Just a Guy View Post
    ... like a giant vacuum.

    I just had a rather heated argument with a Christian friend of mine. I told him I was considering Islam and was studying the Qu'ran and he immediately got all defensive.

    "I'd stay away from that if I were you. They're going to deport you as a terrorist." etc.

    We're not really talking anymore now because of it...

    If he's like that, I wonder what my family is going to think if and when I tell them...
    Don't worry. His reaction was normal. :/ Talk to him again once he has calmed down.
    Well that sucked...

    I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.

  9. #7
    Who Am I?'s Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Thanks, everyone. I took some time to calm down and I feel a bit better. I'm still disappointed in his reaction, but then again I should have expected as much from this guy, now that I think about it.

    If the measure of a faith is how much you are persecuted for following it, it looks like I may be going the right way. I'm still not looking forward to telling the family about my new interest in Islam though...

  10. #8
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Just a Guy View Post
    Thanks, everyone. I took some time to calm down and I feel a bit better. I'm still disappointed in his reaction, but then again I should have expected as much from this guy, now that I think about it.

    If the measure of a faith is how much you are persecuted for following it, it looks like I may be going the right way. I'm still not looking forward to telling the family about my new interest in Islam though...


    you really don't know how anyone is going to react. the more knowledge that you have, the easier it will be. your responses get better.

    here's a brother you can learn from, Mufti Ismail Menk. check out the general lectures:

    http://www.muftimenk.co.za/Downloads.html

    for you and Flame:

    My family became hostile and mean towards me. My mother launched a vicious campaign against me, forbidding my relatives to come to my aid in any way. My husband's family holds me responsible for "destroying" my husband's life. My father-in-law hasn't hesitated to blame me if anything went wrong. I've been made fun of and mocked at. My sister is no longer in talking terms with me. My brother isn't interested in maintaining relations with me either.

    So yeah........ it's going to be a bumpy ride ahead. It isn't going to be a bed of roses. It hasn't been so for me..... but I LOVE the challenge, the hardships and the difficulties. I'll face anything for Allah, The Most High! And with a smile too. lol.
    just imagine that you are in Paradise and Rasulullah, peace be upon him, comes over to you and says, "you know, i know that you experienced the same kind of hardships in the dunya that i did!"

    just imagine it...

    what kind of bond is that!

    Allah is preparing you, In Sha'a Allah, for a great future.

    the time to worry is when there are no bumps in the road!

    wa Salaam
    | Likes جوري liked this post
    Well that sucked...

    Had the non-believer known of all the Mercy which is in the Hands of Allah, he would not lose hope of entering Paradise, and had the believer known of all the punishment which is present with Allah, he would not consider himself safe from the Hell-Fire
    http://www.muftimenk.co.za/Downloads.html

  11. #9
    Flame of Hope's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Just a Guy View Post
    I'm still not looking forward to telling the family about my new interest in Islam though...
    At this point in time there is no need for your family to know about your interest in Islam. Did you know that the early converts to Islam kept their faith secret? Many concealed their faith. I have done so myself...... at different times.

    That's why one can never look at people and judge them by their appearances. A person may be a Muslim .... have Islam in his heart but he is concealing his faith. I suspect a lot of people in the US conceal their new found faith.

    You can reveal to your family about your beliefs later...... when you feel strong enough to confront them. But at this time, at this point of struggle in your life, it's best you keep a low profile.... and keep your interest in Islam a secret.

    Isn't it enough that God knows your struggle towards Him? And isn't He the best to help?
    Well that sucked...


    It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.


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    Flame of Hope's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by YusufNoor View Post
    the time to worry is when there are no bumps in the road!
    Beautiful!

    I like bumpy rides. They are more exciting and keep you on your toes. lol.

    Yeah............ I take everything with a pinch of salt. :thankyou: Or else life would be unbearable.
    Well that sucked...


    It is pointless to watch other people's houses crumbling when our own house is in need of repair and attention.


  14. #11
    al yunan's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Salam dear brother,

    There is a well known verse in the Quran "with every difficulty there is relief" so never despair and as for your ability to withstand hardship this verse may comfort you "for no person is burdened beyond their ability".
    When you describe your inner turmoil it also reminds me of the Hadith where the Prophet s.a.w Inshallah said "the great battle (Jihad ul Akbar) is to fight your Nafs (negative character traits)"
    The reward for which is one of the highest placements in Islam.
    So take heart you are already on a glorious path that leads to the Road of the Righteous (Siratal Mustaqim).
    There are already so many of us who look at you and see ourselves years ago taking our first steps so please keep in mind that you honour us by including us in your journey.

    May Allah S.W.T grant you strength of heart and peace of mind.
    Masalam

  15. #12
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    YusufNoor, awesome post. Thanks for the links. I will definitely check that site out when I get home. Probably download some lectures and put them on my MP3 player.

    Flame, I am not telling the family right now that I am studying Islam. Especially my mother. She is going through enough with having surgery Tuesday for breast cancer, and she doesn't need this extra grief right now. I don't want to put this on her too.

    al yunan, thanks you the words of encouragment. I guess you could say that this is my personal jihad as I struggle to sort out the darkness of my life. It's funny though. When I was living my life of isolation and depression, I never really had anything to worry about. Most of my problems were in my head. It's only when I am trying to sort everything out that crap starts piling up on me. I guess that's the way it is though.

  16. #13
    Revert 2010's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Salam bro, may Allah bless and guide you on your spiritual journey.

  17. #14
    IAmZamzam's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Just a Guy, I am somewhat of a da'i, you know. Would you like any help in committing yourself to the faith? Are there any lingering doctrinal doubts you want to discuss?
    Well that sucked...

    Peace be to any prophets I may have mentioned above. Praised and exalted be my Maker, if I have mentioned Him. (Come to think of it praise Him anyway.)

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    Re: Well that sucked...

    I recommend that you not tell a lot of people, nor to get into heated discussions because after a while you may get discouraged. Grow in your knowledge, faith and practice of Islam first. I went many years with only a small amount of faith in my heart after getting discouraged.

  20. #16
    al yunan's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Yahya Sulaiman View Post
    Just a Guy, I am somewhat of a da'i, you know. Would you like any help in committing yourself to the faith? Are there any lingering doctrinal doubts you want to discuss?

    assalamu alaikum brother Yahya,

    Is this offer for Just a Guy only or open to others as I have some doctrinal problems.

    Masalam

  21. #17
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Flame View Post

    My family became hostile and mean towards me. My mother launched a vicious campaign against me, forbidding my relatives to come to my aid in any way. My husband's family holds me responsible for "destroying" my husband's life. My father-in-law hasn't hesitated to blame me if anything went wrong. I've been made fun of and mocked at. My sister is no longer in talking terms with me. My brother isn't interested in maintaining relations with me either.

    So yeah........ it's going to be a bumpy ride ahead. It isn't going to be a bed of roses. It hasn't been so for me..... but I LOVE the challenge, the hardships and the difficulties. I'll face anything for Allah, The Most High! And with a smile too. lol.
    I totally fall inlove with your character :*

  22. #18
    Riana17's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Just a Guy View Post
    ... like a giant vacuum.

    I just had a rather heated argument with a Christian friend of mine. I told him I was considering Islam and was studying the Qu'ran and he immediately got all defensive.

    "I'd stay away from that if I were you. They're going to deport you as a terrorist." etc.

    We're not really talking anymore now because of it...

    If he's like that, I wonder what my family is going to think if and when I tell them...

    I need a drink...

    Sorry, I just had to vent. You don't have to respond. I'm not looking for any sympathy here.
    I need not to say much, i think Ms Flame's is far more convincing than what I would say
    But seeing this youtube video of Mr Nouman Ali Khan about "Why Allah is doing this to me", I hope you can find time to watch bcoz its powerful advise as well.

    My prayers are with you.
    salam Alaikkum brother

    (P.S. I changed my username)

  23. #19
    Riana17's Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Quote Originally Posted by Flame View Post


    Beautiful!

    I like bumpy rides. They are more exciting and keep you on your toes. lol.

    Yeah............ I take everything with a pinch of salt. :thankyou: Or else life would be unbearable.
    You are my IDOL !!!
    I pray inshallah I will be like you, now thinking about moving to different place (same company) Im already kind of upset LOOOL so weeak

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  25. #20
    Who Am I?'s Avatar
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    Re: Well that sucked...

    Thanks all again for your replies.

    Yahya Sulaiman, I do have some doctrinal issues, but I am leaving in a few minutes and will be gone for most of the day, so I do not have time to discuss them right now. When I get back, we can talk about it if you like.

    Riana17, I did not realize who that was until you told me that you changed your name.

    MustafaMC, I think that is a good idea. I talked to my mom yesterday about her upcoming surgery but I didn't mention that I've been studying Islam. She doesn't need that extra stress right now.


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