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How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

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    Marzieh's Avatar Limited Member
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    How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

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    For example if i had a angry discuss i can not sleep and say aaaah i am bad human and must not show that behavior, please my friends really thank you
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    format_quote Originally Posted by Marzieh View Post
    For example if i had a angry discuss i can not sleep and say aaaah i am bad human and must not show that behavior, please my friends really thank you
    It is better that each person judges themself and others by the guidance of Allah and seeking of His face. There may come a time when Sa'ad does not fear the blame of blamers in the work of Allah.
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    format_quote Originally Posted by Marzieh View Post
    For example if i had a angry discuss i can not sleep and say aaaah i am bad human and must not show that behavior, please my friends really thank you
    Assalamualaikum.

    Since I was kid I often hear people say "Think about what you will get before doing something, because regretting it later is useless". Good advice, indeed. And I think you have ever heard similar advice too.

    But unfortunatelly we often forget this advice. We do something wrong, behave badly, ....... and regretting it later. Why I did that?, why I behaved like that?. But, will this regret change what has happened?. Of course not. However, we still can take a lesson from the mistake that we have done to make us aware and not doing the same mistake again.

    My advice for you. Rather than just regret and continously asking yourself "Why I did that?, why I behave like that?", it's better if you take a lesson from the mistake what you have done, and promise yourself that you will try to not make mistakes again. From my personal experience, In Shaa Allah, it can make you feel better.

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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    Greetings and peace be with you Marzieh;

    There seems to be so much injustice in this world, and it makes us feel angry, because there is little we can do to put things right. If you are having an angry discussion, try talking slower and quieter, this will help you feel calmer, you can still say the things you need to say, but without the anger.

    If you feel you are going to get into an angry discussion, try praying for the other person, they are also craving the same peace that you crave. If you are going to bed feeling angry, pray for forgiveness for yourself, and pray that Allah will also forgive the other person. when you learn to forgive, then you will find peace. You will never look into the eyes of anyone who does not matter to Allah.

    Reflect on the 99 names of Allah, his justice, compassion, mercy and forgiveness are helpful in times of stress. Trying to control feelings of anger is a lifetime struggle, I am only 69 and still learning.........

    In the spirit of praying to a just and merciful God,
    Eric
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    You will never look into the eyes of anyone who does not matter to God.
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    Marzieh's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    Yes true, i damage from judge, i hate when somebody speak bad with mother or..but for me it will happen after i say it to someone ,so i think i must abandon judge others, thants so much
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    format_quote Originally Posted by Marzieh View Post
    Yes true, i damage from judge, i hate when somebody speak bad with mother or..but for me it will happen after i say it to someone ,so i think i must abandon judge others, thants so much



    Your initial question was bait - and your last comment was also bait.
    Are you a troll?
    Or have you never read the Quran and other available knowledge and are therefore ignorant and/or lack wisdom? Know that ignorance is no excuse - but can be used in appeals for clemency.
    Read the Quran and delve you base of knowledge before asking questions which materialize as trolling and baiting that hinders people from the path of just truth.


    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Justice_in_the_Quran


    The snow queen, winter queen, queen of narnia, wicked witch of the west keeps a plain face when she attempts to marr beyond recognition that which is fair and just - however, Allah will without doubt make the deen al haqq manifest over all other ways of life with true justice however much the mushrikeen and kuffaar hate it, and she will realize that she was marring her own complexion when being unjust and was looking at the mirror on the wall.

    -----


    There were a king with a large jaw and a queen with a plain face, on the throne of England;
    there were a king with a large jaw and a queen with a fair face, on the throne of France.

    Charles Dickens - A Tale of Two Cities.






    يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا كُونُوا قَوَّامِينَ بِالْقِسْطِ شُهَدَاءَ لِلَّهِ وَلَوْ عَلَىٰ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَوِ الْوَالِدَيْنِ وَالْأَقْرَبِينَ إِن يَكُنْ غَنِيًّا أَوْ فَقِيرًا فَاللَّهُ أَوْلَىٰ بِهِمَا فَلَا تَتَّبِعُوا الْهَوَىٰ أَن تَعْدِلُوا وَإِن تَلْوُوا أَوْ تُعْرِضُوا فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ خَبِيرًا


    Yusuf Ali (Saudi Rev. 1985)
    O ye who believe! stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest ye swerve, and if ye distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well-acquainted with all that ye do.

    O you who have believed, be persistently standing firm in fairness and justice, witnesses for Allah, even if it be against yourselves or parents and relatives. Whether one is rich or poor, Allah is more worthy of both. So follow not [personal] inclination, lest you not be just. And if you distort [your testimony] or refuse [to give it], then indeed Allah is ever, with what you do, Acquainted.

    Quran 4:135




    يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا كُونُوا قَوَّامِينَ لِلَّهِ شُهَدَاءَ بِالْقِسْطِ وَلَا يَجْرِمَنَّكُمْ شَنَآنُ قَوْمٍ عَلَىٰ أَلَّا تَعْدِلُوا اعْدِلُوا هُوَ أَقْرَبُ لِلتَّقْوَىٰ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ خَبِيرٌ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ


    M. M. Pickthall
    O ye who believe! Be steadfast witnesses for Allah in equity, and let not hatred of any people seduce you that ye deal not justly. Deal justly, that is nearer to your duty. Observe your duty to Allah. Lo! Allah is Informed of what ye do.

    Yusuf Ali (Saudi Rev. 1985)
    O ye who believe! stand out firmly for Allah, as witnesses to fair dealing, and let not the hatred of others to you make you swerve to wrong and depart from justice. Be just: that is next to piety: and fear Allah. For Allah is well-acquainted with all that ye do.

    Quran 5:8





    105. We have sent down to thee the Book in truth, that thou mightest judge between men, as guided by Allah. so be not (used) as an advocate by those who betray their trust;
    106. But seek the forgiveness of Allah. for Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.
    107. Contend not on behalf of such as betray their own souls; for Allah loveth not one given to perfidy and crime:
    108. They may hide (Their crimes) from men, but they cannot hide (Them) from Allah, seeing that He is in their midst when they plot by night, in words that He cannot approve: And Allah Doth compass round all that they do.
    109. Ah! These are the sort of men on whose behalf ye may contend in this world; but who will contend with Allah on their behalf on the Day of Judgment, or who will carry their affairs through?
    110. If any one does evil or wrongs his own soul but afterwards seeks Allah.s forgiveness, he will find Allah Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.
    111. And if any one earns sin. he earns it against His own soul: for Allah is full of knowledge and wisdom.
    112. But if any one earns a fault or a sin and throws it on to one that is innocent, He carries (on himself) (Both) a falsehood and a flagrant sin.
    113. But for the Grace of Allah to thee and his Mercy, a party of them would certainly have plotted to lead thee astray. But (in fact) they will only Lead their own souls astray, and to thee they can do no harm in the least. For Allah hath sent down to thee the Book and wisdom and taught thee what thou Knewest not (before): And great is the Grace of Allah unto thee.
    114. In most of their secret talks there is no good: But if one exhorts to a deed of charity or justice or conciliation between men, (Secrecy is permissible): To him who does this, seeking the good pleasure of Allah, We shall soon give a reward of the highest (value).
    115. If anyone contends with the Messenger even after guidance has been plainly conveyed to him, and follows a path other than that becoming to men of Faith, We shall leave him in the path he has chosen, and land him in Hell,- what an evil refuge!
    116. Allah forgiveth not (The sin of) joining other gods with Him; but He forgiveth whom He pleaseth other sins than this: one who joins other gods with Allah, Hath strayed far, far away (from the right).
    117. (The Pagans), leaving Him, call but upon female deities:They call but upon satan the persistent rebel!
    118. Allah did curse him, but he said: “I will take of Thy servants a portion Marked off;
    119. “I will mislead them, and I will create in them false desires; I will order them to slit the ears of cattle, and to deface the (fair) nature created by Allah.” Whoever, forsaking Allah, takes satan for a friend, hath of a surety suffered a loss that is manifest.
    120. Satan makes them promises, and creates in them false desires; but satan’s promises are nothing but deception.
    121. They (his dupes) will have their dwelling in Hell, and from it they will find no way of escape.
    122. But those who believe and do deeds of righteousness,- we shall soon admit them to gardens, with rivers flowing beneath,-to dwell therein for ever. Allah.s promise is the truth, and whose word can be truer than Allah.s?
    123. Not your desires, nor those of the People of the Book (can prevail): whoever works evil, will be requited accordingly. Nor will he find, besides Allah, any protector or helper.
    124. If any do deeds of righteousness,- be they male or female – and have faith, they will enter Heaven, and not the least injustice will be done to them.
    125. Who can be better in religion than one who submits his whole self to Allah, does good, and follows the way of Abraham the true in Faith? For Allah did take Abraham for a friend.
    126. But to Allah belong all things in the heavens and on earth: And He it is that Encompasseth all things.

    From Quran, Chapter 4
    Last edited by Abz2000; 07-06-2018 at 12:28 PM.
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    Marzieh's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    Ah no i am muslim, i read Quran but not completely, and my problem is i thought i am bad human, but never nobody dont say it, all say i am good, but my mind, ah really i hate from these thinking, i am a very 100% or 0% girl, mean i believe all things must be 100% good, or if for example i am reading book, or doing something, if i do perfect 80% of it, but 20% not, i thought aaah my action had not any positive influence, just i believe 100%, without any problem from me...can i say clear?my english is not very well but i ment a human who like be without problem from herself, not damage or sad someone else...same this, and really thank you for puting your time to me, i must find these sura and read perfect, really i believe God but because always i thought negative, i think never i can be positive , after being positive suddenly a negative being happen, but i tired from negative thinking, i need believe more to Allah and more self confidence, really thanks for your sentences ,i was busy in mind, so dont have mood to see these messages, i though not many people answer but i see really kindly people in this site, really thanks a lot, God bless you

    - - - Updated - - -

    format_quote Originally Posted by Abz2000 View Post
    It is better that each person judges themself and others by the guidance of Allah and seeking of His face. There may come a time when Sa'ad does not fear the blame of blamers in the work of Allah.
    format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto View Post
    Assalamualaikum.

    Since I was kid I often hear people say "Think about what you will get before doing something, because regretting it later is useless". Good advice, indeed. And I think you have ever heard similar advice too.

    But unfortunatelly we often forget this advice. We do something wrong, behave badly, ....... and regretting it later. Why I did that?, why I behaved like that?. But, will this regret change what has happened?. Of course not. However, we still can take a lesson from the mistake that we have done to make us aware and not doing the same mistake again.

    My advice for you. Rather than just regret and continously asking yourself "Why I did that?, why I behave like that?", it's better if you take a lesson from the mistake what you have done, and promise yourself that you will try to not make mistakes again. From my personal experience, In Shaa Allah, it can make you feel better.

    Yes this mind says a lot, copletely true, we always must think about after saying something, really thank you, we always need remember this
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    Abz2000's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    God knows wot you're on about - what i'm saying is a plain fact - that it is better to judge oneself and others by Allah's guidance so as to avoid injustice, and so as to avoid injustice being done to oneself.

    Know that Allah is merciful to the sincere, the truthful, and those who repent to Him - but that rebellion and shirk arouse His jealousy and wrath.
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    Marzieh's Avatar Limited Member
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    Salam dear friends, thanks for your answers a lot, but i can not post reply as currect, there is many titles, quick reply or 2 message icon,...i dont know how can i reply just for somebody person, not it posted as a reply to my quot...thanks a lot if help me
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    format_quote Originally Posted by Marzieh View Post
    Salam dear friends, thanks for your answers a lot, but i can not post reply as currect, there is many titles, quick reply or 2 message icon,...i dont know how can i reply just for somebody person, not it posted as a reply to my quot...thanks a lot if help me
    Asalamu alaikum rahmatulah wa barakatu
    Just below the like button is a button called quote. Click that on a person's post to quote them
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    “Allah gave you a gift of 86,000 seconds today, have you used one to say ‘Alhamdulilah"
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    Re: How can i stop judging myself?thanks a lot

    You should pray instead of blaming yourself, sister. Praying is the solution to every problem. Works for me every time
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