[This is a tribute for a childhood friend who recently passed away due to heroin overdose. We have a huge problem with opioid abuse in the U.S., and people are finally starting to take notice. In my opinion, the key here is to begin to view this as a mental health crisis, not a criminal problem. Here in the U.S., we need to stop the "War on Drugs" and begin to actually treat people with mental illnesses.]
This is for my old friend Stephen Hare, who recently lost his life-long battle with substance abuse. Elliot Smith's Between the Bars seemed a particularly appropriate tribute to Stephen because of the relevance of the lyrics, but also because Elliot Smith was another brilliant, creative mind who we lost far too soon. He suffered the same fate as Stephen, lost the same battle.
So many of us struggle with issues like these alone, whether it's substance abuse, chronic depression, cutting, thoughts of suicide, PTSD, autism, or something else. We often hear that our troubles are the result of unethical choices. The solution is simple, we are told. Stop choosing unethical behaviors and choose to do good instead. But as anyone who struggles with mental health issues knows, it's never this simple. Free will is not a magical, all-powerful entity that can program and reprogram its own machinations. We are biological beings driven by impulses born of evolution, genetics, and early learned behaviors. If you have a mental illness, getting well often requires so much more than a simple choice to change, if change is possible at all.
If these words resonate to you on some level, if you have suffered without knowing the cause, if you feel that something is wrong and can't find your way out of your own mental maze, for whatever reason -- please, please seek help. Know that you are not alone. Know that it's not your fault. Know that - although many will not understand - there are those of us who share your struggles and will fight along side you even if the battle may never be won. Know that there is help available, both in the form of mental health professionals and community support groups. No matter what they say, there is goodness in your heart, and you deserve as much love, sympathy, and support as anyone. Know that you are loved, you are appreciated, you have gifts, and you have so much to offer to the world. But you might need help to get there, and that's ok. Seek, and ye shall find.
[This is a tribute for a childhood friend who recently passed away due to heroin overdose. We have a huge problem with opioid abuse in the U.S., and people are finally starting to take notice. In my opinion, the key here is to begin to view this as a mental health crisis, not a criminal problem. Here in the U.S., we need to stop the "War on Drugs" and begin to actually treat people with mental illnesses.]
This is for my old friend Stephen Hare, who recently lost his life-long battle with substance abuse. Elliot Smith's Between the Bars seemed a particularly appropriate tribute to Stephen because of the relevance of the lyrics, but also because Elliot Smith was another brilliant, creative mind who we lost far too soon. He suffered the same fate as Stephen, lost the same battle.
So many of us struggle with issues like these alone, whether it's substance abuse, chronic depression, cutting, thoughts of suicide, PTSD, autism, or something else. We often hear that our troubles are the result of unethical choices. The solution is simple, we are told. Stop choosing unethical behaviors and choose to do good instead. But as anyone who struggles with mental health issues knows, it's never this simple. Free will is not a magical, all-powerful entity that can program and reprogram its own machinations. We are biological beings driven by impulses born of evolution, genetics, and early learned behaviors. If you have a mental illness, getting well often requires so much more than a simple choice to change, if change is possible at all.
If these words resonate to you on some level, if you have suffered without knowing the cause, if you feel that something is wrong and can't find your way out of your own mental maze, for whatever reason -- please, please seek help. Know that you are not alone. Know that it's not your fault. Know that - although many will not understand - there are those of us who share your struggles and will fight along side you even if the battle may never be won. Know that there is help available, both in the form of mental health professionals and community support groups. No matter what they say, there is goodness in your heart, and you deserve as much love, sympathy, and support as anyone. Know that you are loved, you are appreciated, you have gifts, and you have so much to offer to the world. But you might need help to get there, and that's ok. Seek, and ye shall find.
The solution is simple, we are told. Stop choosing unethical behaviors and choose to do good instead. But as anyone who struggles with mental health issues knows, it's never this simple.
Free will is not a magical, all-powerful entity that can program and reprogram its own machinations.
i dont know what to say to you.
we convince ourselves every day that the world we live in is exactly how we think it to be. day in day out.
was thinking about buying a nissan note today.. and must have spotted a fair few.
wear a hi-vis to work, spot a lot more people wearing them nowadays.
your not willing to admit how powerful free will is, or how easily the mind can be upset.
but,
sooner or later you cant keep getting away with unethical choices, because the people you know, the circles you move in, the things that proceed you and follow you..will get you into trouble.
allah swt raises and lowers as he wills.
and i might tell you its a crooked game, not one thats played by well folk..
but in ignorance we all have to play.
im sure a lot of people got an easy out because of your friend. you wouldnt want to be one of them im sure.
but what can we do?
..your on a religious forum, with many people questioning why such a rigid rule set exists or why the tenets of faith have to be followed.
they are hard lessons to learn when people have become accustomed to your mistakes.
have to say i havent met god, but what proceeds and follows them is as clear as clockwork.. its not something your meant to know apparently.. whats behind the curtain is anybodies guess.
whats behind the people is more concerning.
...but yeah, support groups and sincere helping hands are the way to go.
a change of people that know you, the circles you move in, those that have knowledge of you.
im sorry for you really.
the whole chapter is worth a read but.. its a good one.
(21:59) (When they saw the idols in this state) they said: "Who has done this to our gods? Surely he is one of the wrong-doers."
(21:60) Some of them said: "We heard a youth called Abraham speak (ill) of them."
(21:61) The others said: "Bring him, then, before the eyes of the people that they may see (what will be done to him).
59. This was exactly what Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) expected to happen. He wished that the matter should not remain confined to the priests and the attendants but the common people also should be present there to witness that their deities were helpless and their priests were deluding them about their powers. The priests committed the same folly as was later committed by Pharaoh when he arranged an encounter between Prophet Moses (peace be upon him) and the magicians in the open in front of the multitudes of the common people, and the former got an opportunity to show publicly the miracle of the staff which shattered the illusory, magical tricks of the magicians.
(21:62) (On Abraham's arrival) they said: "Abraham, are you he who has done this to our gods?"
(21:63) He answered: "Rather it was this supreme one who has done it. So ask them, if they can speak."60
60. The very sentence, “So ask them, if they can speak”, is a clear proof that it was not a lie when Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) said: “But this has done it, biggest of them, this one”. What he intended by this was to make them realize and confess that their idols were helpless because they could do nothing to protect themselves and could not even speak. It is clear that when a person poses an unreal question for the sake of argument in order to bring home the fact that the position taken by the other party is untenable, it cannot be considered as a lie; firstly, because the speaker himself never intended it to be a lie, and secondly, because the addressees also knew that it was not a lie.
The foregoing remarks have been necessitated because of a tradition that Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) told three lies in his life, of which one is the above mentioned event. The second lie is contained in SUrah As-Saffaat, Ayat 89: I am indisposed, and the third lie is not contained in the Quran but in the Bible that he declared his wife to be his sister. (Gen. 12:12,13, 18;19). It is a pity that this tradition has given rise to two divergent opinions. The orthodox traditionalists actually believe that Prophet Abraham told these lies just because an authentic tradition says so. They do not consider that it is far better to discard the tradition according to which a Prophet is accused of being a liar. On the other hand, those who are against the traditions, discard all of them just because this solitary tradition, which has been reported as authentic by Bukhari and Muslim, is unreliable on the very face of it. Obviously it needs no elaborate arguments to prove that all the traditions cannot be discarded just because one or a few of them are unreliable. As regards the upholders of the first opinion, they have gone to the other extreme and think that a tradition can be discarded in spite of the authenticity of its reporters for cogent reasons. They do this without reference to the contents of the tradition itself. But if the text of the tradition itself clearly shows that such a thing could not have been said by the Prophet (peace be upon him), there is no reason to insist that it should be accepted as authentic merely because its reporters are authentic.
This, tradition is unreliable for other reasons also. As has already been shown, the first lie is no lie at all. As regards the second lie, “I am indisposed”; it cannot be considered as a lie unless it is proved beyond doubt that Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) was perfectly healthy at that time, and the text does not testify this. As regards the third lie, the event stated in the Bible in chapter 12 of Genesis is absurd on the face of it. When Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) went to Egypt with his wife Sarah, he was, according to the Bible itself, 75 years old and his wife was 65. Therefore the very age of Sarah is a clear proof that she could not be a fair woman to look upon to force Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) to pose that she was his sister in order to save his life. The tradition under discussion, which accuses Prophet Abraham to be guilty of telling a lie, has accordingly no basis at all and cannot be taken as reliable in spite of its authentic reporters.
(21:64) Thereupon they turned to their (inner) selves and said (to themselves): "Surely it is you who are the wrong-doers."
(21:65) Then their minds were turned upside down,61 and they said: "You know well that they do not speak."
61. Literally the original text means: They were turned down upon their heads. Some commentators have interpreted it to mean: They hung down their heads with shame. But this does not fit in the context and the wording of the text. The right interpretation would be: When they considered the answer of Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him), they realized that they themselves were in the wrong, because they had set up helpless idols as deities, which could not even speak a word as to who had broken them. But soon after this, they were overpowered by obduracy and ignorance which perverted their minds and they again relapsed into crookedness.
(21:66) Abraham said: "Do you, then, worship beside Allah a thing that can neither benefit you nor hurt you?
(21:67) Fie upon you and upon all that you worship beside Allah. Do you have no sense?"
(21:68) They said: "Burn him, and come to the support of your gods, if you are going to do anything."
(21:69) We said: "O fire, become coolness and safety for Abraham."62
62. Though this is one of those miracles which have been clearly stated in the Quran, there are people who try to prove that there was no such miracle at all. According to this passage (Ayats 68-70), Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him) was actually threatened to be burnt alive and he was accordingly thrown into the burning fire, but Allah ordered the fire to become cool and harmless for him. In the face of the clear words of the Quran, these people deny this miracle because according to them it is impossible even for Allah to go beyond the routine of the physical laws. They say that miracles cannot appeal to the rationalists of the modern age, and therefore these should be interpreted in accordance with physical laws. They forget that according to the Quran, Allah is able to do everything, and He does extraordinary and unusual things which cannot be explained by science. Therefore they should accept the Quran as it is or discard it, but they should not twist it to suit their so called rationalism.
(21:70) They had sought to do evil to him, but We caused them to be the worst losers,
I may have more to respond to your post later, but regardless whether we agree on any particular point, I would like to say: Thank You. Thank you for reading my thoughts and trying to empathize. Thank you for engaging your mind so effectively and responding so thoughtfully. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings in this forum. It means a lot.
I am so sorry to hear about your friend, he must have been a very troubled soul. I watched my dad die an alcoholic and the tragedy often seems to be; that you cannot reach out to them in any meaningful way. Sometimes when we are witness to these tragedies, it gives us the sense that we should be more aware and try and reach out to the people we meet today. I see you are aware of the agencies that can help people, we can only pray for our loved ones and keep them in our thoughts.
My condolences, Dan, I am so sorry to hear about that It is important to give yourself a break, in case you catch yourself blaming yourself, which is too often the case. It is not your fault. Addiction gets the best of us. Our friends, fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, grandparents. No matter how hard we try, addiction gets too powerful for too many. Like you said, it is a serious problem that needs addressing, the problem with opioids especially. Life is a precious thing. You may have someone one day and look forward to seeing them and the next minute they're gone. I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather before I could see him again, because of political pressures from the Turkish government and so I could not return to Turkey for 5 years, and he died early due to smoking he did early in his life, and old age. My biggest nightmare, silence, and a repressive government separating me from my family. We all experience loss. Just know that these things get better with time, and with healthy coping skills, and with support from others. Hope this helps.
My condolences, Dan, I am so sorry to hear about that It is important to give yourself a break, in case you catch yourself blaming yourself, which is too often the case. It is not your fault. Addiction gets the best of us. Our friends, fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, grandparents. No matter how hard we try, addiction gets too powerful for too many. Like you said, it is a serious problem that needs addressing, the problem with opioids especially. Life is a precious thing. You may have someone one day and look forward to seeing them and the next minute they're gone. I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather before I could see him again, because of political pressures from the Turkish government and so I could not return to Turkey for 5 years, and he died early due to smoking he did early in his life, and old age. My biggest nightmare, silence, and a repressive government separating me from my family. We all experience loss. Just know that these things get better with time, and with healthy coping skills, and with support from others. Hope this helps.
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The solution is simple, we are told. Stop choosing unethical behaviors and choose to do good instead. But as anyone who struggles with mental health issues knows, it's never this simple.
It is important to give yourself a break, in case you catch yourself blaming yourself, which is too often the case. It is not your fault. Addiction gets the best of us. Our friends, fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, grandparents. No matter how hard we try, addiction gets too powerful for too many. Like you said, it is a serious problem that needs addressing, the problem with opioids especially. Life is a precious thing. You may have someone one day and look forward to seeing them and the next minute they're gone. I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my grandfather before I could see him again, because of political pressures from the Turkish government and so I could not return to Turkey for 5 years, and he died early due to smoking he did early in his life, and old age. My biggest nightmare, silence, and a repressive government separating me from my family. We all experience loss. Just know that these things get better with time, and with healthy coping skills, and with support from others. Hope this helps.
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