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  1. #1
    Islami.mu’min's Avatar
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    Help! Getting someone to convert!

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    Assalamu alaykum. Scroll down for SUMMARY if u dont want to take time to read. Jazakallhu khayran

    A man who our family has known for a while is now changing. I can tell you that this man was very evil but kind at the same time. He had a rough pass. He fought in wars so Im assuming that the sight of him killing someone really messed him up. This man was always into politics, gambling, MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY!!! He was always kind to our family, but he will use others if it helps him to become politically more powerful. My mom told him for years, give this life up. He even asked me if I could take him to the Masjid so people could see that he is morally right and could vote for him!!! Terrifying! He was a catholic. His wife died from cancer at a young age. He freaked out and became atheist. He HATES jews and some other nations. He even wanted to travel down to Isreal to do something that could get him killed. Thank goodness he wasn’t able to leave. I tried to get him to convert after he came to visit us. My family tells me to give up. My mom still wants him to live a better life and she has hope. His evidence that Islam is “fake” is that Houdini (magician) tried to find spirits and he couldnt. He actually believes this nonsense! For all I know, this magician could be a devil worshipping fraud. Oof.

    SUMMARY of first paragraph: This man who was Christian became atheist after his wife died and turned absolutely nuts!

    FOR THIS PARAGRAPH, THERE IS ANOTHER SUMMARY
    now. He contacted us once again. He told my mom she was right all this time. He wants to live politics. He wants to stop moving from motel to motel. He wants to settle down a few minutes away from where we live. Now this man has always loved our family. He will always listen to me lecture, but I dont know if he will believe.
    So why does he want to change? He is getting old, I feel that his time may be near. But of course Allah swt knows everything and I will never know his real death time. However, he told us he almost died because he was sent to the hospital a few times. He is very sickly, old and overweight.

    SUMMARY of second paragraph: This man is very sick now and he realized he wasted his life chasing nothing. He wants to live his life happy, by living near us. He has not mentioned religion though. I do believe he will listen to me and he has always been kind enough to.

    1)
    Lets get down to the point. I already got awesome evidence that can persuade him the Islam is real. However, I need good videos and good things to tell him and give him hope. Goodness gracious, last time he tried to persuade me to the fact that Islam is fake. Do you guys know what I can do?? Any videos??? Any hopeful videos that are super influential!! Dont forget, although he has changed to a good living. He is still a human with evil desires, lust for women, evil entertainment, ect. So it may be hard. Afterall, some people out there are just too lazy to pray!
    2)
    And I have a question. I am female, he is a male. Way older than me. Took care of me when I was a young child. I am aware that he isnt my Mahram and will take precautions(NEVER being alone with him). However, is it haram for me to recite Qur’an in an emotional tone for him? My male members dont really do it emotionally. I want him to cry. If not, I totally understand. I could look up videos of recitations online

    Lets do our best to spread dawah, I will make dua! Jazakallahu khayran, once again.

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  3. #2
    Eric H's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Greetings and peace be with you Islami.mu’min;

    I am aware that he isnt my Mahram and will take precautions(NEVER being alone with him)
    From what you have said, I think this should be your priority.

    His wife died from cancer at a young age.
    Im assuming that the sight of him killing someone really messed him up
    He even wanted to travel down to Isreal to do something that could get him killed.
    Giving advice is fraught with problems, we don't know you or him. Secondly, if we give advice, then we are not the person who has to carry it out, so please be cautious.

    From my experience and from what you have said, you seem to be dealing with a very angry man. Often people have the right o be angry when they witness injustice, or what they perceive to be an injustice, the challenge is always how to deal with anger and to be the kind and caring man that he was created to be. He seems angry with God after his wife died, and more than likely he is angry with other people. He seems angry with himself, in the way that he is talking about going to Israel to be killed. The dilemma is that he does not want to die, but he wants his pain to stop, sadly he does not know how to stop his pain.

    Deep down the man seems to be kind and caring, but life and its problems seem to have knocked all the kindness out of him. I believe the solution is in how he can come to terms with letting go of past hurts and coming to terms with forgiven others and forgiving himself. Gambling is a form of self harm and desperation, unless he is one of those vary rare people who win. My uncle lost a million through gambling, he was always going to win, but died penniless.

    You can only pray for help and guidance from Allah. If the man is still suffering from bereavement, he needs to find something else meaningful to fill his time with. If he spent twenty hours a week with his wife, he needs to find something else to fill those twenty hours with. Maybe encourage him to volunteer in some way, possibly to help people injured through conflict. Continue to be kind, but make sure he does not mistake kindness for any hope of a relationship, but I sense you are already doing this.

    May Allah bless you and help you to be a blessing to those you meet,
    Eric
    | Likes Ahmed., Islami.mu’min, Mandy liked this post
    Help! Getting someone to convert!

    You will never look into the eyes of anyone who does not matter to God.

  4. #3
    Ahmed.'s Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    walaikum assalam rahmatullahi barakatuh

    I don't know about this one, you say he still has desire of lust and as he's non-mahram, you're not really supposed to be near him at all but maybe it's ok for dawah reason with a 3rd person present and as long as you're modestly dressed wearing hijab.

    Show him some YouTube videos of western scientists confirming scientific miracles of Quran:

    https://youtu.be/vOYpjZywUPA

    And end of times signs that have come true:

    https://youtu.be/1eBCa-vw6Ss

    And as brother Eric said, be careful, he does seem like an unpredictable and messed up man
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  5. #4
    Islami.mu’min's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Yes thank you. And these videos are really good.
    Also, I reassure you that no relationship will take place between us. He respects our islamic boundries and he is a MUCH older man who is interested in MUCH older women. And a few other family members will be there with us.
    He did have messed up thoughts, but he always trusted us. So I hope things turn out well. Inshallah, he has made many changes I believe, after he experienced his near-death experience.
    Jazakallahu Khayran
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Quote Originally Posted by Islami.mu’min View Post
    Yes thank you. And these videos are really good.
    Also, I reassure you that no relationship will take place between us. He respects our islamic boundries and he is a MUCH older man who is interested in MUCH older women. And a few other family members will be there with us.
    He did have messed up thoughts, but he always trusted us. So I hope things turn out well. Inshallah, he has made many changes I believe, after he experienced his near-death experience.
    Jazakallahu Khayran
    You are very kind sister to want to help him. But keep in mind your safety should be the number 1 priority.
    Make sure you are never alone with him. Even better, have more than one other person present. Also try to meet him in relatively public places. So that there are other people relatively close by that you may call on in case of trouble.

    One last word of warning. Him being much older does not make it safer for you. Unless you are saying he is an elderly in a wheelchair, he is still someone you should be careful with.

    On a more positive note, I hope you succeed in making him accept the truth of Islam. May you be rewarded for your hard work and dedication to help others.
    | Likes Eric H, Islami.mu’min liked this post

  8. #6
    Eric H's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Greetings and peace be with you Islami.mu’min;

    He respects our islamic boundries
    It takes a lot to gain respect and that is powerful. Often people don't care what others believe, especially if it is conflict with their own beliefs, you and your family seem to have made an impression on him. It seems like you have earned the right to talk about your faith, and that is a gift not granted to many people.

    An older man has had a lifetime of listening to clever arguments, I feel it will be your testimony and your journey with Islam throughout your life that will mean more to him. How has Islam influenced you and your family to be the wonderful people you are today? How does prayer, fasting, modesty etc help you to be a better person? Why is Islam better than going out partying and having relationships with a number of people? - Just some random thoughts.

    May Allah bless you in all that you do,

    Eric
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    Help! Getting someone to convert!

    You will never look into the eyes of anyone who does not matter to God.

  9. #7
    HijabiHelper's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Asalaamu alaikum,
    You should make dua most importantly and support and guide this person to the best of your ability.
    Also, like others have said watch some youtube videos etc. Trust in Allah.
    | Likes Islami.mu’min liked this post

  10. #8
    Islami.mu’min's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Thank you all. I don’t know what happened to him. He contacted out family once to buy a house and he disappeared. I hope he doesn’t go back to the bad habits but I’ll ask my family to contact him again.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I will keep making dua. It’s just so hard to get him to believe. He likes the teachings of Islam. But he thinks it is a total fake and he thinks we have false hope. His evidence is ridiculous. I just hope my evidence I put out makes him believe...

  11. #9
    Mandy's Avatar
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    Re: Help! Getting someone to convert!

    Quote Originally Posted by Islami.mu’min View Post
    I will keep making dua. It’s just so hard to get him to believe. He likes the teachings of Islam. But he thinks it is a total fake and he thinks we have false hope. His evidence is ridiculous. I just hope my evidence I put out makes him believe...
    Duas are all that you can truly do to help that person. He will come to open up his hearth to Allah once he is ready.
    Converting can be a long process. Of course, once we have done it, we don't understand why we waited that long. But you push too hard, the other person might push back and that would drive him away from Islam. Be available to guide and share information, but let him progress at his own pace.


    If he agrees with the teaching of Islam, but does not yet believe, he has traveled a part of the journey. Time will allow him to travel the rest of the way.
    | Likes Islami.mu’min liked this post


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