two cannibals were walking in the desert
so they found a dead clown and started eating it
so one of them turned to other and said: does this taste funny to you ?
\drums
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two cannibals were walking in the desert
so they found a dead clown and started eating it
so one of them turned to other and said: does this taste funny to you ?
\drums
What's the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a bottle a glue?
- You can "tuna" (tune a) piano, but you can't tuna fish!
What about the glue?
- I knew you'd get stuck on that one.
Panic buying before lockdown. I saw a man with a trolley load of oysters in Tesco - so Shellfish.
A man walks into the bank and stands on one leg.
The cashier asks, what are you doing?
Checking my balance.
A man fishing on his boat in the middle of a lake wanted a smoke, but had no lighter.
He threw a cigarette in the lake and made his boat a cigarette lighter.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick
For real, in real life recently, i called my uncle in turkey and he texted me on whatsapp saying, "we're at the repair, call back later," so in order to confuse him I wrote "Putin is my mother!" in turkish.
One that works
Room full of people making jokes.
little nephew walks in
"SAY STRAWBERRY"
CHORUS: "strawberry"
"YOUR BOARBERRY!!!"
... gets the loudest laughs in the room.
Bacon and eggs walk into a restaurant
The host says "We don't serve breakfast here"
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
DAM!
what do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh