Muezzin and Minaz: Masters of Might, Magic and Monday Mornings

**Muezzin** · 11-04-2005

Having trouble getting to school on time? Trying to tell people you hate Marmite, but just can't get through? Had enough of that pesky next-door neighbour's dog taking chunks out of your left buttock every morning?

Fear not! Minaz and I, the Masters of Might, Magic and Monday Mornings, are here to help!

How are we masters, you ask? We are masters of might because Minaz goes through protein shakes like popcorn, is in top athletic form and works out everyday.

And I do sit ups.

We are masters of magic because we can watch those 'Behind the Magic' shows with the Masked Magician and work out how the trick is done before they tell us. Eh? Eh?

And why are we the undisputed champions of Monday Mornings?

Because we get up on time, all the time, every time.

So send us your problems and we'll try our utmost to solve them. Even if we make them worse, at least you'll have a laugh.

Let me adjust that slightly - at least WE will have a laugh.

n.b - this thread is in Halal Fun for a reason. If you require serious advice on a topic, go to the Cyber Counselling forum.

**minaz** · 11-13-2005

p.s. would it be a good idea to contact Aamirsaab's agency instead or are you guys ok with this?

If you want 2nd hand toilet paper than be my guess

Anywho brother Muhammad, you have came to the right place, we here at Muezzin and Minaz: Masters of Might, Magic and Monday Mornings INC, have experience in this trade in the form of.........watching every episode of "Only fools and horses". Think as me as Del boy and Muezzin as Rodney (but fat compared to skinny

) Anywho the answer to your problem is simple, life is too short, live it to the max, think of all the extra bargains you could make by just getting rid of some silly precious ones

On an Islamic note (

yeh had to be said), what you take into the hereafter are your deeds not your possessions

**Muezzin** · 11-14-2005

Right, that's sorted then. And by the way Minaz, I'm not Rodney - I think you'll find I'm more like Fletcher off Porridge.

Any further problems?

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-14-2005

Originally Posted by Muezzin

Right, that's sorted then. And by the way Minaz, I'm not Rodney - I think you'll find I'm more like Fletcher off Porridge.

Any further problems?

No probs...well, yeah there is one....but u wont be able to do anything now..............just make dua that I pass my maths exam (taking it today

).

Im shivering in my boots....

**Muezzin** · 11-14-2005

I'll get right on it. Insha'allah you'll pass. I mean, I passed my maths exams and if I can do it, anyone can.

**Far7an** · 11-14-2005

Assalamu alaikum

My bag is too heavy, Muezzin can you come to Portland at 12:00pm and carry it for me?

I tried removing books that I won't need for today, it's still heavy.

The library has a vending machine for disk and cds, cool!

Also, have you signed the petition in the prayer room? We need some more people to sign it, any ideas on that?

And lastly, I don't have enough time for lunch today, any suggestions on where I can go, for a quick munch?

**Muezzin** · 11-14-2005

Originally Posted by Far7an

Assalamu alaikum

My bag is too heavy, Muezzin can you come to Portland at 12:00pm and carry it for me?

Sorry, I was out to lunch.

laying:

I tried removing books that I won't need for today, it's still heavy.

S'alright. Pretty soon, you'll have muscles as big as this guy's:

arnie - Muezzin and Minaz: Masters of Might, Magic and Monday Mornings

The library has a vending machine for disk and cds, cool!

It does? Wow.

Also, have you signed the petition in the prayer room? We need some more people to sign it, any ideas on that?

I didn't know there was a petition.

I'll see if I can get there early on Friday insh'allah, and sign it then.

Wait a minute, what is the petion for?

And lastly, I don't have enough time for lunch today, any suggestions on where I can go, for a quick munch?

Two letters: SU.

**Sahabiyaat** · 11-15-2005

i just killed a mouse...by accident

i'm a murderer.

what shall i do to get over my grief ?

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-15-2005

Okay u know wat. I cant concentrate in my chemistry class bcuz of two boys that act like.....a bunch of girls.:rant:

The story:

They each have a laptop and bring them into lesson. Why? So, that they can put their rock music on full blast.
Take yesterday for example, Adrain (lecturer) was going round the class and noting down stuff to put in the reports. He asked u s stuff like how is chem compared to blagh blagh suject....

ANYWAY, Adrian had given us a past exam paper to do while he went round asking others a few lardy daa questions. THOSE FREAKS!!! put the volume up full blast. I couldnt concentrate.....So, EVENTUALLY, i turned round and sed:

'Either u stick ur era phones in ur ear OR u switch that stuff OFF!!'

The volume went down for about 5 mins. Next minute, I can hear the crash banging music again.

I have prayed so much for that laptop to BLOW UP!!!!

wat can I do......its REALLY REALLY ANNOYING!!!!:mad:

By the way, if I havent mentioned it b4 ill tell u now....the music they listen to is:errrr.....metal and that horrid rock.....:rant: :rant: :rant: :rant:

Allah ma3akum
p.s: I need sum answers cuz I have lesson at about 10:30am.

**Muezzin** · 11-15-2005

If they don't wear these, you wear these

But seriously... tell the teacher that they're being disruptive if they persist in playing their (crappy, if I might be so bold in saying) music so loudly. Maybe then they'll get the picture.

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-15-2005

Originally Posted by Muezzin

If they don't wear these, you wear these

But seriously... tell the teacher that they're being disruptive if they persist in playing their (crappy, if I might be so bold in saying) music so loudly. Maybe then they'll get the picture.

Why do I have to be the one who has to stuff those horrid things in my ear for?:mad:

Plus!!! My chemistry teacher looks like one of those baddies out of James Bond.....but he is such a mouse (God forgive me for talking about my teacher like this

laying: ). He is like a woman wen it comes to shouting.....(basically, he just skreeches).

*sigh*

Allah ma3ak

**Muezzin** · 11-15-2005

Fine. Get a magnet and 'accidentally' drop it right behind the laptop. One fried circuit later - instant silence.

Apart from the cries of 'What the hell happened to my laptop?!'

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-15-2005

Originally Posted by Muezzin

Fine. Get a magnet and 'accidentally' drop it right behind the laptop. One fried circuit later - instant silence.

Apart from the cries of 'What the hell happened to my laptop?!'

Omg...brother this sounds good. No, wallah it does.

So, lets get it right:

I get hold of a magnet and then......?

*whispers*Where an earth do i get a magnet from bro?

laying:

Those freaks beta watch out....Ameeratul layl is on the loose

**Muezzin** · 11-15-2005

Originally Posted by Ameeratul Layl

Omg...brother this sounds good. No, wallah it does.

So, lets get it right:

I get hold of a magnet and then......?

And then.. well, you really shouldn't put it right next to the laptop, because it'll really mess it up.

*whispers*Where an earth do i get a magnet from bro?

laying:

You've got until 10.30 right? Nip down to B&Q.

Those freaks beta watch out....Ameeratul layl is on the loose

Incidentally, if this works, I accept no responsibility for any resulting charges of criminal damage, or proceedings otherwise undertaken.

How's that for covering my butt.

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-15-2005

Originally Posted by Muezzin

And then.. well, you really shouldn't put it right next to the laptop, because it'll really mess it up.

Ahhh...brother.....where abouts do I put the magnet? Which part of the laptop?
You've got until 10.30 right? Nip down to B&Q.

Mommy sed im not allowed to go out of college. Id better not anyway. Horrd ppl in this world.

Incidentally, if this works, I accept no responsibility for any resulting charges of criminal damage, or proceedings otherwise undertaken.

How's that for covering my butt.

Dont worry bro, Ill just cum back and haunt u ..IF ....i die (if they kill me.lol)

**Muezzin** · 11-15-2005

Magnets have a habit of messing up electronics. I don't think it matters which part of the magnet. Again, I'm not telling you to do anything resemblimg criminal damage, you're just infering it

And you're not allowed to go out of college? No problem. Just 'accidentally' walk past the table and knock the computer off.

Ooops!

...well, that's what I might do. But I'm bonkers. Just tell the teacher, really.

Originally Posted by Ameeratul Layl

Dont worry bro, Ill just cum back and haunt u ..IF ....i die (if they kill me.lol)

I don't believe in ghosts.

**Ameeratul Layl** · 11-15-2005

And you're not allowed to go out of college? No problem. Just 'accidentally' walk past the table and knock the computer off.

Ooops!

Lol.....no chanec bro. They treasure those laptops like God know wat.:rant:
...well, that's what I might do. But I'm bonkers. Just tell the teacher, really.
I wud...but like I sed.....Plus!! they are on the other side of the lab.

I don't believe in ghosts.

[/QUOTE]

Brother, u must learn to believe in mIracles

laying:

**sapphire** · 11-15-2005

salamz.....this thread is working greatly....
i have a problem...

i dunno if its good or bad..but...well...umm....my sis...(who lives in a bedroom that is in the same house as me) has joined this forum...and i dont like ittttt........i mean she is totally bonkers over her maniac muslim forum and wont let me join that...then what does she do...comes and joins here...and funny...all my friends i have on this forum are the first to greet her and welcome her...so what do i do???

**minaz** · 11-15-2005

I havn't greeted nor welcomed her

, anywho you should really ask my 50% sareholder in this company as he has a brother on this forum

**sapphire** · 11-15-2005

oh ya bro minaz...apart from you......

hes gone offline now....well i'll wait for him then...but anyhow...give your view....

**baby_muslimah15** · 11-15-2005

Originally Posted by sapphire

salamz.....this thread is working greatly....
i have a problem...

i dunno if its good or bad..but...well...umm....my sis...(who lives in a bedroom that is in the same house as me) has joined this forum...and i dont like ittttt........i mean she is totally bonkers over her maniac muslim forum and wont let me join that...then what does she do...comes and joins here...and funny...all my friends i have on this forum are the first to greet her and welcome her...so what do i do???

What is your sis name on here???