Assalaamu'alaiykum! I pray you're in the best of health and emaan.
I am wondering if anybody could give me some tips or pointers in regards to making some good Muslim friends.
I have about 3 close friends but recently something happened which made me feel as though I need to widen my horizons and widen my circle of friends.. especially good Muslim girls my age (21)!
I have applied to volunteer with charities and asked around a few people I know if there are any girl groups but no luck.
Any other ideas? If you're in the same boat and are also a sister looking to make new friends, & are looking for a friendship which will benefit you in both lives feel free to reply to this thread! (:
I understand your struggle...its hard to find good people who share our morals and remind us of Allah and who doesn't backbite, gossip and mock others as a habit. In todays society, its the social norm to gossip and talk about one another...its all about the "latest gossip" in our workplace and schools. But I personally, rather have few good friends than befriend and spend time with those who kill my eman...those who make your feel bad after talking to them because you ended up listening to their gossiping or bad hurtful speech.
But none of our friends are perfect...even good people have flaws and may do/say things that will hurt us. We have to forgive and overlook. If we look for a friend who is perfect, we would all be friendless.
We meet in our life some special people who we get on with very well who share our view points and agree with our ideals and have similar outlook in life & sense of humour...these people are very few but will be your best and forever friends who you can talk to every day.
But then we also meet in our life friends who are good people with many good traits but there may be somthings they do & say that your heart finds uncomfortable, e.g. like backbitting or lying or mocking or flirting, scornful about others. With such friends its best not to talk to them regularly if you're a sensitive person who can't easily overlook occasional mockery/gossiping etc. but we should never forget the good in others and occaional bad words doesn't make them a bad person.
I know its hard to find good muslims sometimes because there are not many muslims around us! But don't give up hope, turn to Allah & ask The Lord of the Universe, Allah will bring some good people in your life inshaAllah. Keep looking in places you would expect good people to be found...praying in mosques, studying quran/islamic classes, if your in univeristy then in islamic society, charity/voluntary works, girls only sports/fitness clubs etc. It doesn't necessarily have to be a muslim, some non-muslims have very good morals, good character and respects that we muslimas do not have boyfriends, drink alcohol, go clubbing or mix with men etc but most non-muslims are not very aware.
Anyway, we can find good and not so good people everywhere, the difficult part is figuring out who are good for us for our life and Iman and who we should stay away from...it takes some time to figure someone out and we have to be picky about allowing someone to be our close friend. Nonetheless, we have to be friendly and kind of be friends with everyone but we have to careful about who we choose to be our true friends in life.
May Allah swt bless you and all of us with good muslim friends who will remind us of Allah, to do good and to become better people for the sake of Allah, Ameen.
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