I registered here couple of weeks ago and have been browsing discussion. Many of them are very helpful. Thank you! Now I would like to introduce myself and share my story.
I am Cristian orthodox. I live in Europe. I had long relationship with a man who can’t have children due to health condition. But as I am 34 years old already, I understood that I need no find a way to get pregnant soon if I want to have child, because I am getting older and I would like to have 2-3 children. I prayed for Mother Mary and told to God I would like to have a baby. After two week I was already pregnant from donor, I got pregnant at first try. I was so happy, and felt fulfilled with joy. I loved my baby from the first day of pregnancy. I felt it is miracle that God gave answer to my pray immediately.
But then things started to get wrong. I god bad results at blood test and scanning. Doctors made more analyses, but at 5th month of pregnancy, my baby died. I was very miserable and cried a lot. I didn’t understood what happened. I prayed for baby, got pregnant after two weeks, but after some time baby was taken away from me. I kept asking why. Also I was angry, because I didn’t understood, why I was denied to become a mother. I would have loved my baby so much and take good care of him.
After first shock and plenty of tears I started to think how to carry on. I was on antidepressants and got also sleeping pills, because I couldn’t control my mind and grief was overwhelming. I tried to find solution. But being Christian means that you are supposed to suffer, and I didn’t find any answers from my religion.
I have couple of Muslim friends. They are all very happy and calm persons. They pray every day, and they can rely on God – he will take care of them. I found this idea interesting and started to learn Islam. Now I am reading Quran, also I found this web site. I find idea of Islam soothing. Islam says that I need to accept what I get, to pray, and I will be happy and get reward. Now I feel already stronger, because I know that there is someone to whom I can trust and ask for advice.
I still want to have a baby. I broke up the relationship, because there would be no future and no hope for family, and he didn’t wanted to discuss variants and to have kids. I hope that soon I can move on and maybe find some nice husband, get married and have a baby together, and get a happy, loving family. There are not many Muslims in my country. Most likely I will not find a Muslim husband, and I am not Muslim too, (yet?) but the most important is that the person is good and decent. I keep learning Islam and let’s see what happens. I want to believe that God has some plans for me and I will be happy some day.
Welcome. I am sad to hear your strugle. But from an Islamic point of view, before everything, accepting Islam is the most important achievement and happiness. Inshallah, you will do this first. As for marriage and pregnancy, you know the story of the Prophet Ibrahim and Sarah. She got pregnant at a very old age as a gift from Allah. So always keep searching.
Please keep in touch with us. If you accept islam out of sincerity, if Allah wills it He will help you and grant you righteous husband and righteous children.
Thank you for your message! I know this story from Bible, but I didn't think about it until you mentioned it. I am reading and studying Quran now, but have not get this far yet. This really gives me hope. I think, I should try to be a better person and do good things, and trust that I will get rewarded.
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