I have found that I have had less imaan and practice of Islam lately....
I eat non zabiha meat, I shaved my beard, I bought into Kemalist propaganda, seeing them as the lesser of the evils in my parents' home country of Turkey, I chatted with females online, I stare at girls, I masturbate, and I even considered leaving Islam because I didn't see the point anymore......I also don't want to listen to quran, started listening to music again, rush my prayers, and even started disrespecting my mother more.....how do I stop?
You have to be willing to stop. We all go through low points in our spiritual lives, but the first step is to agree with God that something like lust or masturbation is wrong. How do you feel after you've stared at a woman and had a sexual fantasy? does it make you feel energized? does your prayer life become more passionate as a result? or, do you feel sick to your stomach? One of the truest signs of a believer is that the believer hates sin. If you do the things you mentioned and have no remorse and the desire to do it again, that's a serious problem.
However, you are already making progress. I believe that making this thread is a sign that you want Allah to rescue you from those haram habits. Making dhikr has benefited me greatly and I'll explain why. When I do dhikr, such as Tasbeeh Fatima, I'm able to focus my mind. I'm equipping my mind to focus intently on one thing. Therefore, when a situation comes up and I see a woman showing off her cleavage, I'm able to lower my gaze because my mind has already been trained to focus on dhikr. If you can focus in an easy time, you can focus in a tough time.
If you can make progress on fighting lust, giving up masturbation will be much easier. Also, fast. Fasting will help tremendously.
If there was a 'formula' or an easy way, surely life would not be a test that it is….So always remember that life is a test and it has been designed that way. The story of Satan tempting us, that we are given nafs and temptations, only to have our mind and reason to act against the onslaught of Satan's whispers is quite a big task!
A continuous big task! Until we die...
Another thing we MUST remember is that 'we will be judged' and there will be no escaping it. Leaving islam does not negate that Day…
So, we must face the test in the best way we can. That is the only way through. Don't give up.
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