I am Ruji Rahman, aged 20, a student in London studying Biomedical Science. It was interesting to meet a new Muslim over the summer who attended some of my lectures at university and is studying in the same year. In fact I was more impressed by Abi's change in almost everything, particularly her pre-negative views about Islam.
It cannot be gone unnoticed the negative image presented about Islam specifically Islam's treatment of women which has been rampant in the media creating an 'Islamophobia' in society. I thought it would be interesting to interview Abi Lee-Carter who in the midst of all propaganda has warmly embraced Islam.
What interested you to Islam?
Before University I had never met anyone Muslim. I was Christian and, like many people I know, only went to church for weddings, christening and funerals. I believed in God but my religion didn’t feature in my life.
One of my flat mates in University halls was a practicing Muslim and was my first insight into Islam. Islam fascinated me because of its 'controversial nature'; people seem either passionately for it or fiercely against it. A year later, I got free booklets and leaflets about Islam and a free copy of the Qur’an during Islam Awareness week at my Uni.
I read about Islam with an open mind (though slightly skeptical), but was impressed that I could get a comprehensive and rational answer to the questions I had: How did I get here? Why am I here? And where am I going? I was surprised to find an insight into my own life in the Qur’an and that caused me to do some serious self- analysis. I realised my priorities were misplaced, but was pleasantly surprised that a lot of my own strong beliefs were also features of Islam. The more I read, the less skeptical I became. Islam is so unique because it deals with every aspect of human life. It’s decisive and and, unlike a lot of religions, does not contradict itself. It’s a religion that asserts the truth and then proves it! How many other religions can do that?
I felt enlightened (excuse the cliché, but its true!) and over time, decided that Islam was the truth and a way of life that I wanted to be a part of.
How has Islam changed your life?
It goes without saying that things are really different once you become a Muslim.
“This day, I have perfected your religion for you, completed My Favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion.” (Surah 5:3)
The Qur’an and the Sunnah (what the prophet Muhammad (pbuh) did, said and approved of), provide us with a definitive guide for our entire life. It’s not just a case of good vs. evil or halal vs. haram because humans have Free Will. By calling myself a Muslim, I willfully submitted my life to the Will of Allah. As daunting as this sound, it really has changed my life for the better. This way of life that covers every aspect including my conduct within society, socially and at home, it even advises me on finance and politics. I was so indecisive before and acted too often on impulse. When asked why, my usual reply was “I don’t know…I just did it.”
Nowadays, I am conscious of all my actions and I do try to make everything I do purposeful. Being a Muslim means I have a Fear of Allah– not fear in the sense that I am scared, but that I’m continuously aware and mindful that Allah (SWT) knows everything that goes on. We are reminded in the Qur’an that, “Allah is Well- Acquainted with what you do.” So, I find myself (often subconsciously), thinking about the immediate consequences of my actions as well as the future (when I’ll be called to account for them on the Day of Judgment).
The more obvious changes are that I pray 5 times a day (which isn’t actually as hard, inconvenient as it sounds) and I cover my hair and wear the Islamic dress when I go out. I don’t feel the need to go clubbing every night or sit in front of the TV all day because I actually prefer to be more productive with my time. Im very rarely bored nowadays- in fact Im run off my feet and having so much fun because there are so many things to get involved in. I am more conscious of my health and am trying to maintain it and take advantage of my youth and my fitness by doing what I can- while I still can.
At long last I have focus and have definite goals for every aspect of my life and that’s a relief because I know what I’m working towards and the everyday things I do are more exciting now. I’m contented (the strongest and truest form of happiness) because I appreciate everything I have (even the little things), so much more now and that’s the greatest feeling. I worry less because I am confident that Allah (SWT) has provided me with everything I need.
I am more considerate of other people and a lot less selfish. Im trying to be more helpful and more patient with my parents because Islam has made me value all they do for me, and it's hugely improved our relationship with each other.
Since becoming a Muslim I have met the most amazing people and received such warmth and kindness. I’m now part of a community that accepts me regardless of my age, race or background and I feel comfortable being around them.
How did people respond to you converting to Islam such as your family?
Al hamdulillah, I’ve been so lucky! The first family member I told was my brother. His words were “Really! That’s cool!” which was a fantastic confidence booster. My biggest worry was telling my parents and it took me a while to actually break the news. It was important to me that they accepted my decision. I told my mum first and she was slightly shocked, I had let her know that I was reading about Islam beforehand, but reading and actually becoming Muslim are two very different things. My parents were worried about how others would react towards me because the view of Islam in the World is such a negative one at the moment and my mum was worried about me taking it all “too seriously”. The Islamic dress code was also an issue at first as well because they thought it was unnecessary and a bit “extreme”. They are getting used to it now and they are very supportive of me. I teach them what I can about Islam to help dispel some of their misconceptions and that helps a lot. They comment on the positive changes they’ve seen in my personality and behavior. My actions rather than my words have proved to them that I am earnest and Islam isn’t just a ‘phase’. My friends were shocked and a bit freaked out at first but they’re getting used to it and they respect what I’ve done.
What advice would you give to someone who is interested in Islam?
So many people have so much to say about Islam and it can get very confusing. I found books and the Internet helpful. But be cautious of what you read on the Internet because it’s not all accurate - make sure statements are backed up with proofs from the Qur’an and Sunnah. Reading is helpful but I found the best way to find out about Islam is by speaking to practicing Muslims. Visit a mosque (call first if you can), I found the larger mosques are great and people are more than willing to help. Don’t be afraid to ask questions (even if you think they're stupid), because as Muslims we know that there is no shame in religious questions. Most importantly, as a new Muslim sister once said to me, “keep your mind and heart open” that way you’ll find out everything you need to know and don’t be disheartened if you have a negative experience because sincere Muslims will be more than willing to help you.
It has been quoted by many that the Muslim Woman is forced to wear the headscarf and Jilbab (Islamic dress). Do you share this view?
In a word, no! I wear khimar (headscarf) and jilbab (over- garment) and no one forced me into it. I’ll admit, it wasn’t an easy decision because the pressure to look good in this society is so great.
Women are evaluated on their outward appearance; your hair, your figure your dress sense (or lack of it) are all under continuous scrutiny. Meanwhile market tells us what to wear, what we need to buy or which treatments would best improve our looks. After purging and preening ourselves to distraction, we allow society to tell us how we compare against the ever-changing ‘ideal’.
Unfortunately, we allow the way we look, and what people think about our appearance affect the way we feel about ourselves.
Modest dress is a requirement in Islam for both men and women equally. In the case of women, the Qur’an states “ O Prophet tell your wives and daughters, and believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons; that is most convenient that they should be known (to be Muslims) and so as not to be annoyed…”(33:59). Muslim women wear the khimar (headscarf) and Islamic dress because Allah (SWT) has instructed us to do so. We don’t wear it to make ourselves look ugly or to bury our beauty but to redeem respect by worshipping the One who created us.
In the West most men regard women as highly sexual objects and women unwittingly fall prey to stares and comments even molestation. The headscarf and Islamic dress prevents this; if they are judged it’s for their conduct, personalities and mind, not bodies.
Let’s suppose Muslim women were being forced to cover… how do you explain thousands of Muslims around the world who are protesting for the right to wear the hijab, our right to obey Allah (SWT), our right to be respected for our character and intellect and our right to control what we choose to show of our bodies and to whom?
Muslim women around the world are taking to the streets in their thousands. In London, 2000 people marched outside of the French embassy; women protested in Jordan, and more than 1000 teenage Muslim women marched in Beirut calling for France to overrule its ban. This struggle is nothing new. Women have been protesting for the right to wear the hijab in Turkey in the 90’s with sisters being sent to prison for merely attending peaceful demonstrations.
These educated and articulate sisters have decided to wear the head scarf and Islamic dress in submission to Allah (SWT) and to liberate themselves from an image obsessed society, but they don’t get a mention in the popular media and so the myths are kept alive.
It’s superficial and irresponsible to assume that any woman who wishes to keep her body private is oppressed or has been forced against her will.
What is your opinion on the common labels associated with Muslims, such as "terrorist", "fundamentalist", "extremist"?
To be frank, I think that governments and the media need to start using the dictionary and thesaurus more often to broaden their vocabularies. You can’t pick up a newspaper without reading these phrases. It’s amusing that all you need to do to create a new buzzword is add ‘-ist’ at the end of it and then use it to describe Islam.
I can’t stand this sudden ‘one-size-fits-all’ attitude that’s been adopted when describing Muslims or anything even vaguely Islam-related. A dictionary-defined terrorist as someone who ‘advocates intense fear as a means of coercion’ and also describes a person ‘who panics and causes anxiety’. I would therefore, be correct in labeling alarmist military officials and world leaders as terrorists because of the fear of Islam they brought about. The words used depend on the motives behind what is being said, and this is what it boils down to.
Nowadays people assume that because a Muslim believes the Qur’an is the word of Allah they are “fundamentalists” and “extremists”. Ignorance breeds fear and the people in ruling positions fear the power of Islam so they use emotive labels to create and maintain rampant Islamophobia. I sympathise with the despair of the Muslim people; and this goes for many Muslims. People are only allowed to hear one side of the story and I think it's important that the average Muslim finally has a say. We're really not all bad…you just have to converse with us.
What was your view about Islam and its treatment of women before you converted to Islam?
To be honest, I believed most of the negative things I was told by people who claimed to know about Islam. This was firstly because I had never met or interacted with any Muslims, and secondly, because I was under the assumption that Islam was something that a non- Muslim could never possibly understand, so I didn’t bother trying.
I’m not ashamed to admit that my view of Muslim women was a negative one because I know better now. It wasn’t that I thought the women were bad people, I just felt so sorry for them! I saw them as vulnerable people, completely subordinate to men, with no rights and prevented from having their own opinions! I was told that their lives were terrible; usually being one of 4 wives and probably facing frequent physical and mental abuse, which they accepted as the norm. I had heard stories that women were not allowed to get an education because that was exclusively reserved for men and that Muslim women to all intents and purposes were enslaved.
Has your view changed in any way?
That goes without saying or I certainly wouldn’t be a Muslim now! My previous views were due to ignorance. The biggest amendment I’ve made is that I thought I’d have nothing in common with a practicing Muslimah (female Muslim) but that’s just not true. All the sisters I have met have become my friends and are similar to me and even some of my non- Muslim friends; we enjoy the same pastimes, share views on life and political issues (Islamic and otherwise), in fact we share views on a lot of things.
I’ve found Muslim women to be among the most strong- willed and informed women I’ve come across. I am genuinely impressed by their natural proficiency in critical assessment of situations and those who haven’t gone into higher education show the same sharp intellect as the highly academic people I know. I think it's because Islam encourages us to use our minds more, so our brains are constantly being stimulated and Islam gives the woman the right to seek an education, to have a political voice, views and opinions. In my opinion Muslim women are strong, have a voice, self- confident and self- respecting and should be used as a positive example for all women.
What is your view on the common impression non-Muslims may have that Islam oppresses the woman, and gives her no voice or role in society?
It’s just a shame that such damaging and dismissive views of Muslim women have saturated public (mass- media driven), opinion. It aggravates me that people don’t take the time to educate themselves about Islam and then claim to be experts on the affairs of Muslim women.
How can a religion that earnestly elevated the status of women, giving them control, more than a thousand years ago, awarding them rights that non- Muslim women could only dream of, be oppressive? Islam gave women the right to divorce (although always seen a last resort), even before Christian women in the West. As well as that, a Muslim woman has the right to negotiate her own terms of marriage, including the right to accept or reject a marriage proposal without any pressure so there goes the myth that Islam condones forced marriages.
Islam gives women the right to financial independence –she can earn money and spent it as she wishes, and still has right to be supported by her husband for all her needs. Most significantly, Muslim women have the right to be identified as thinking individuals, rather than being sex objects, they are respected and appreciated.
When the Prophet (PBUH) was asked who among us deserves the most care and respect he replied “your mother (and he repeated this three times)” which goes to show the high esteem and impotence of a woman’s role in society. It is women who produce and nurture a strong and upstanding community and in Islam, this integral role is recognised, honored and rewarded. Yes, sadly some Muslim women are oppressed by men in some parts of the world today but not under the instruction of Islam.
Many have highlighted the oppression of women in Islam due to women's lives in Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, Iran and Afghanistan under the Taliban regime. What is your opinion on these states and whether they reflect Islam?
I think it’s important to realise that cultural opinions have no relation to, or superiority over true Islamic teachings. These states do not reflect an Islamic caliphate in any way. I won’t claim to be an authority on what goes on in the countries you have mentioned but I do strongly disapprove of some practices. When I read how women are brutally abused by their husbands, or prevented from leaving the house, or denied an education and prevented from carrying out day to day tasks like shopping and driving (all things that we take for granted) it disturbs me.
No one would deny, (not even Muslims) that in a lot of cases, the things that go on in these Muslim majority countries is inexcusable and especially when they are carried out in the name of Islam. Islam prohibits all of these actions and they directly violate the rights awarded to women by Islam. Sadly, for many people Islam is a culture as opposed to a religion and way of life. Often, in Muslim countries Islam is passed down through generations and authentic Islam falls prey to deletions and additions from other cultures leaving a nation or a large section of society confused. They follow what they assume to be Islam, but actually ignorant of the fundamentals of true Islam and its rules of governing a state. You only have to take a sneak peak into the Islamic history to see how women were protected, honored, given the right of education, the right to vote for a caliph, the right to work, and a significant role in society. During the rule of Umar ibn al-Khattab as a caliph, a woman named Shifa was a market judge who was empowered to pass judgments on violations of the public right. This is the true representation of Islam and its rights given to women in society.
My simple reply is that Islam is perfect; humans, on the other hand, are not!
Stories of Muslim Reverts! - Post yours here! (OP)
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!So we asked them to let it be and maybe I would convert. 
Re: Stories of Muslim Reverts! - Post yours here!
Converted British mom, daughter say they were guided by Allah
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