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Gay Friend

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    Beardo's Avatar Jewel of IB
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    Gay Friend

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    This is an awkward question, but here it goes anyway.

    Would you befriend a gay person? Why or why not? They're a growing population at my school, and I was wondering... I mean, would you be buddies with them or just keep it at a classmate relationship?
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    Re: Gay Friend

    Salaam
    Would I befriend?
    Maybe because if the person is good i wouldn't want to treat them badly because of this..I would also be interested in helping the person , I don't think we should be seperating people...so it depends as long as I have my opinions and they are respected and I am willing to help the person and the person is open minded I don't have a problem.
    Why?
    Because treating people with eqaulity would make life much easier , make us understand each other more , and maybe it;s something out of their hands i would want to judge them,I would also stand up for the person if they're getting bullied or teased but i wouldn't stand up or speak for "rights" because i don't support them. As long as there is respect we should treat people in the best manner we can give. We should never laugh or take advantage of other people's problems...

    Ps-Are you in high school?

    Salaam
    Gay Friend


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    Perseveranze's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: Gay Friend

    No, because that isn't going to end up well. Being nice is pretty much mandatory and I'll always give that, but friendship is out of question.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    I treat them just like any other person, but I don't go out of my way to befriend them.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    Judge them on their kindness, not on being gay. Being gay is just a part of who they are, as being Muslim is just a part of who you are. How would you like it if someone wouldn't be friends with you just because you were Muslim?
    Good friends are hard to come by nowadays. If you find someone who accepts you for who you are, then you should accept them for who they are. Leave the judging up to God.
    Gay Friend

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    Re: Gay Friend

    I think "gay friend" may be both male and female?
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    Re: Gay Friend

    format_quote Originally Posted by Beardo View Post
    This is an awkward question, but here it goes anyway.

    Would you befriend a gay person? Why or why not? They're a growing population at my school, and I was wondering... I mean, would you be buddies with them or just keep it at a classmate relationship?
    Salaam,

    I would make friends with anyone as long as they are not hostile to me or Islam. I have a relative who is gay and he's normal.
    Last edited by GuestFellow; 07-01-2011 at 10:11 PM.
    Gay Friend

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    Re: Gay Friend

    I had some transsexual fiends when I was young and I had no problem with them. Even two of them were good persons, they had left their wrong behavior, always dressed as men although still feminine, and their good side was they never missed salah.

    Transsexual men have feeling to men, but if we accept them as friends, they will respect us and will never do something wrong.

    But be friend with 'masculine gays' ?. From my experience, it's better if we avoid them, especially if you are attractive man. But the problem is, sometime we don't know if someone is a gay until he look at us with loving gaze and praise us with many many beautiful words.

    By the way, a masculine gay who attracted to me when I was in mid 20's age was civil engineer, rich, mustached, handsome, and few years older. But, ........ no thanks ! I am a normal man !.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    I judge people by who they are not by what they are.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    Actually i don`t have anything against gay people if they were good , i fully realize that what they are doing is wrong , but treating them nicely is a must since every human should be treated kindly. But being a friend with them is not an opstion for me ...... What if they got attracted to me? thus i prefer keeping a space ...Allahulmusta`aan ! :S !
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  14. #11
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    Re: Gay Friend

    Salam

    I have nothing against them really but personally they will not be a good friend... for a Muslimah especially
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    Re: Gay Friend

    I have a male friend who I know since my childhood. Some people said he is gay although I am not sure because he never did something wrong to me or to his other friends. But I see something strange with his marriage life, he had married four times but always ended with divorce several months later. I never avoid him although I never meet him again since few years later.

    But if I say, it's better if we avoid 'masculine gays', it's based on my experience. In my mid 20's age I established a small company and made me meet many new persons such as customers or representatives from other companies. And few of them did something 'strange' to me like looked at me with loving gaze, invited me to meet in hotel room, etc. Even one of them (that civil engineer) tried to approach me like a woman who fell in love to a man.

    So, brothers, be careful if a man who known as gay, or a man that look attracted to you want to be your friend. Remember, same like women, they also have a feeling to men.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    Assalam Alekum.

    I read the story of Banu Israeel who use to hunt on saturday while it was forbidden to catch fishes on saturday.

    “And ask them (O Muhammad) about the town that was by the sea; when they transgressed in the matter of the Sabbath (i.e. Saturday): when their fish came to them openly on the Sabbath day, and did not come to them on the day they had no Sabbath. Thus We made a trial of them, for they used to rebel against Allaah’s Command (disobey Allaah)

    And when a community among them said: ‘Why do you preach to a people whom Allaah is about to destroy or to punish with a severe torment?’ (The preachers) said: ‘In order to be free from guilt before your Lord (Allaah), and perhaps they may fear Allaah.’

    So when they forgot the reminders that had been given to them, We rescued those who forbade evil, but with a severe torment We seized those who did wrong because they used to rebel against Allaah’s Command (disobey Allaah).

    So when they exceeded the limits of what they were prohibited, We said to them: ‘Be you monkeys, despised and rejected’”

    [al-A’raaf 7:163-166]

    I read in the interpretation that those people divided into 3 groups.
    1)Who transgress and catch fishes on Saturday.
    2)Who did not catch fishes but they freely meet and mingle with people who transgress.
    3)Those who neither catch fishes nor meet with the disobedient people, they cut off their relations with the disobedients of Allah SWT.

    When Allah SWT sent his torments,He SWT turned both the groups 1 and 2 into Monkeys and pigs and rescued the third party.He punish the group 2 as well because they did not cut off their relations with the disobedients of Allah SWT and did not scare them from the hell fire.
    The moral of this story,according to my understanding is,when people disobey Allah SWT and commit severe crimes and let people know about their sins,and do not shy on them,one should cut off their relations with them.Frist,try to convince them that they are doing wrong and try to stop them and when they dont listen to you and keep on doing wrong deeds,one should stop meeting with such people.
    We are the people who are here to stop people from wrong deeds and invite them towards good.We should not not take such serious crimes as a normal thing.Allah SWT destroyed the whole nation of Lut AS for perversion.If people are going back to the time of Jahilliyah,we should try to stop them and if we are unable to do that,we should simply stop meeting them and stop taking such a serious crime as a normal thing.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    ^ totally agree.
    and i personally like company of ppl who are pure and avoid such shameless activities. when i think of this same gender sex, i feel i will vomit.
    i think this fitna is more in west. in pakistan the sodomy or gay ppl are considerd as most wrost ppl of world. if someone is known to involved in such activity, ppl even dont salam/meet him
    Last edited by tigerkhan; 07-02-2011 at 02:15 PM.
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    Re: Gay Friend



    format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto View Post
    But I see something strange with his marriage life, he had married four times but always ended with divorce several months later.
    I think it is best not to get suspicious. We should avoid suspicion.

    format_quote Originally Posted by Starrynight View Post
    Judge them on their kindness, not on being gay. Being gay is just a part of who they are, as being Muslim is just a part of who you are. How would you like it if someone wouldn't be friends with you just because you were Muslim.
    Good friends are hard to come by nowadays. If you find someone who accepts you for who you are, then you should accept them for who they are. Leave the judging up to God.
    It's culture. Some men assume that a gay man will instantly feel attracted to them, which tells you a lot about these straight men.
    Gay Friend

    I was looking at myself talking to myself and I realized this conversation...I was having with myself looking at myself was a conversation with myself that I needed to have with myself.
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    AabiruSabeel's Avatar Administrator
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    Re: Gay Friend




    format_quote Originally Posted by Beardo View Post
    I mean, would you be buddies with them or just keep it at a classmate relationship?


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    Re: Gay Friend

    format_quote Originally Posted by Guestfellow View Post


    I think it is best not to get suspicious. We should avoid suspicion.
    I agree, we should avoid suspicion. But some of my friends told me, he's a gay. Even my wife who knew him before she knew me also told me the same thing about him. But if he's really a gay, no problem, he never did something wrong to me.

    By the way, he's not a feminine guy. And although he's not handsome, he's macho and rich. Daily he prefer to ride one of his few Harley Davidson.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    People used to think I was gay because I never dated many women and never really talked about women that much. I think even my own parents wondered sometimes.

    I am totally straight. Just never was successful at relationships.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    There are many sins I do not approve of and homosexuality is just another one of them. I have friends who gamble or drink. I wish they didn't but they do. I would put gay friends (if I had any, I don't) in the same category.

    Honestly, of the gay people I know, most lead very secular, atheistic lives. I suspect we are not friends mainly because we don't have much in common.
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    Re: Gay Friend

    format_quote Originally Posted by Endymion View Post
    Assalam Alekum. I read the story of Banu Israeel who use to hunt on saturday while it was forbidden to catch fishes on saturday. “And ask them (O Muhammad) about the town that was by the sea; when they transgressed in the matter of the Sabbath (i.e. Saturday): when their fish came to them openly on the Sabbath day, and did not come to them on the day they had no Sabbath. Thus We made a trial of them, for they used to rebel against Allaah’s Command (disobey Allaah) And when a community among them said: ‘Why do you preach to a people whom Allaah is about to destroy or to punish with a severe torment?’ (The preachers) said: ‘In order to be free from guilt before your Lord (Allaah), and perhaps they may fear Allaah.’ So when they forgot the reminders that had been given to them, We rescued those who forbade evil, but with a severe torment We seized those who did wrong because they used to rebel against Allaah’s Command (disobey Allaah). So when they exceeded the limits of what they were prohibited, We said to them: ‘Be you monkeys, despised and rejected’” [al-A’raaf 7:163-166] I read in the interpretation that those people divided into 3 groups. 1)Who transgress and catch fishes on Saturday. 2)Who did not catch fishes but they freely meet and mingle with people who transgress. 3)Those who neither catch fishes nor meet with the disobedient people, they cut off their relations with the disobedients of Allah SWT. When Allah SWT sent his torments,He SWT turned both the groups 1 and 2 into Monkeys and pigs and rescued the third party.He punish the group 2 as well because they did not cut off their relations with the disobedients of Allah SWT and did not scare them from the hell fire. The moral of this story,according to my understanding is,when people disobey Allah SWT and commit severe crimes and let people know about their sins,and do not shy on them,one should cut off their relations with them.Frist,try to convince them that they are doing wrong and try to stop them and when they dont listen to you and keep on doing wrong deeds,one should stop meeting with such people. We are the people who are here to stop people from wrong deeds and invite them towards good.We should not not take such serious crimes as a normal thing.Allah SWT destroyed the whole nation of Lut AS for perversion.If people are going back to the time of Jahilliyah,we should try to stop them and if we are unable to do that,we should simply stop meeting them and stop taking such a serious crime as a normal thing.


    Salaam Sister Endymion
    I think what you said is correct, But sometimes in certain cases there would be differences and things like that.
    I had a friend shes very nice and good-natured , she never hurt anyone with her mouth and tongue she wasn;t a bad person and she didn't like this topic never brought it up or spoke about it at all.
    One day i found her crying and she is really near to my heart , I asked her about her condition .. she didn't ant to tell me at first but the she told me she has feelings for people from the same gender... My friend told me she is doing all she can to fight it off and al hamdulilah she never put it into action at all she wasn't bad she used to Love the Prophet and used to cry when ever they speak about him , but then she was alittle more patient and alhamdulilah she resisted every trial that came in her face .. My friend now is married to a wonderfull Husband that she loves and he loves her too, she is now a hundred percent straight and happily married.
    I think sometimes there are some people who are tested with such a thing but if they resisted and kept patient Allah will reward them

    With Love your sister May
    Salaam
    Gay Friend


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