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living arrangements

  1. #1
    yazoo's Avatar Limited Member
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    Asalamalaikum

    Hope your well. I feel terrible about this. There is no possitives in this situation for me at all. Im going into my third year at uni and I havent made many friends apart from one girl. Shes not muslim-infact has no faith. But she has qualities I admire- I can trust her, she does not lie etc. Anyways I found out we are living with two guys in our flat. One who is gay. the only thing we share is the kitchen-- i have my own bathroom.

    Im not sure why Imm writing here as I cant chnage the situation. I guess Il try not to be in the kutchen alone iwth them. But my room has its own lock.
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    Salaam sis, i am in the same situation i am also living with two non muslim indian guys... althou i do have a muslim friend living with me but her bf also stays over alot aswel! not only that my ex boyf is living on the floor below aswel so as u can imagine things are not looking good! lol
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    Rafeeq's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by yazoo View Post
    Asalamalaikum

    Hope your well. I feel terrible about this. There is no possitives in this situation for me at all. Im going into my third year at uni and I havent made many friends apart from one girl. Shes not muslim-infact has no faith. But she has qualities I admire- I can trust her, she does not lie etc. Anyways I found out we are living with two guys in our flat. One who is gay. the only thing we share is the kitchen-- i have my own bathroom.

    Im not sure why Imm writing here as I cant chnage the situation. I guess Il try not to be in the kutchen alone iwth them. But my room has its own lock.
    I could not understand what did you meant to convey/share this with us.
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    islamirama's Avatar
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    Re: living arrangements

    I can understand some converts who already were in such a situation before reverting to Islam, but what's the excuse for other Muslims? Sadly many muslim guys and girls run off to university to live on campus or get their own place so they can have their "freedom", and sadly more often then not this freedom results in actions and behavior that displeases Allah. non-Muslim students want to go out of state college or what not to experience that independent living and fun, while Muslim students want to run to other states and away from parents to experience dating and other haraam stuff. And even more sad is the ignorant parents that let them go, taking it so lightly. It makes one wonder, who will face more wrath of Allah from the two?....


    Don't take things so lightly people! remove yourself from haraam environments (rather putting yourself in it) lest you cast yourself in the Fire. Education (seeking knowledge) is obligatory but when you are in an haraam place (living with non-mahrams) then that education itself becomes haraam. Anything that leads to haraam becomes haraam itself.

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    Salaam sis, i am in the same situation i am also living with two non muslim indian guys... althou i do have a muslim friend living with me but her bf also stays over alot aswel! not only that my ex boyf is living on the floor below aswel so as u can imagine things are not looking good! lol
    what kind of this "muslim" friend is that has a bf and fornicates?
    Last edited by islamirama; 09-22-2008 at 08:05 PM.
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    Amatullah_'s Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    Muslim girls living with men??
    Your parents allows this??
    You allow this?
    This is so sad and so not right!!! Astagfirullah!!!
    The situation of the Ummah is so very sad!!!
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    Assalaamu Alaykum wa Rahmatullaahi wa Barakaatuh
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by Amatullah_ View Post
    Muslim girls living with men??
    Your parents allows this??
    You allow this?
    This is so sad and so not right!!! Astagfirullah!!!
    The situation of the Ummah is so very sad!!!
    Agreed,

    Don't say you can't avoid this, ano people travellig to and fro, just to avoid this.
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  9. #7
    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    ur right, i feel ashamed now... but there really isnt alot i can do, i signed my contract at the start of last uni (last november) i really have tried to move out but they wont allow it
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    ur right, i feel ashamed now... but there really isnt alot i can do, i signed my contract at the start of last uni (last november) i really have tried to move out but they wont allow it
    Oh no, feeling ashamed is a good thing, atleast you don't want to be there now because you are ashamed, now you must avoid these guys/brothers while you are there, and please talk to your friend about her boyfriend, if he is Muslim she can ask her rents to hook them up, atleast it'll be a halal relationship, but to be honest, she should just move on, and you should tell her as well about the whole 'you can't have a man un-islamically buddy'.
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    this friend of mine has to gone Umrah now, mashAllah. she knows everything, he does to yet they do everything together, and they want to marry but i know 4 sure they wont be able 2 marry 4 atleast 2 years! n theres to gurantee they will get married anyway so what do i say 2 her? when i had a bad past myself
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    this friend of mine has to gone Umrah now, mashAllah. she knows everything, he does to yet they do everything together, and they want to marry but i know 4 sure they wont be able 2 marry 4 atleast 2 years! n theres to gurantee they will get married anyway so what do i say 2 her? when i had a bad past myself
    How do you feel now that you're over your past?

    Great fo sho, tell her how you feel, n how you felt before,

    Your past is your past,

    You are seeing her do wrong and not stopping it, what will you say if Allaah asks you why you didn't warn her when you knew she was in the wrong?

    If you are her friends you will tell her off, no matter how harsh it may seem at the time, because that's what friends are for,

    If she then understands, getting rid of her boyfriend visits are a start,

    Then you can make new Muslim friends and you can even try trading rooms with someone so that you can stay around more Muslims,

    If that's not possible, stay away from the rooms as much as possible, especially the opposite gender, if you find a muslimah roomate or one closeby, you can hang out with her. The end =D

    Ahh happy families Lol
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    i have spoke 2 her about this, i said to her that Allah SWT has trullu guided me and removed me from a haraam relationship, so many things could have happened between us which i have been saved from Alhamdulilah, and she should think about it. and she said she loves him and will marry him 1 day, insh-Allah. the thing is i remember saying that myself about some1 9 months ago and if it wasnt for what had happened i probably still would have been living haraam, (dont get me wrong im glad now!) insh-Allah when she gets back from Umrah i will talk to her, but im also praying that after coming back from such a sacred place, she herself will change her ways insh-Allah
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    i have spoke 2 her about this, i said to her that Allah SWT has trullu guided me and removed me from a haraam relationship, so many things could have happened between us which i have been saved from Alhamdulilah, and she should think about it. and she said she loves him and will marry him 1 day, insh-Allah. the thing is i remember saying that myself about some1 9 months ago and if it wasnt for what had happened i probably still would have been living haraam, (dont get me wrong im glad now!) insh-Allah when she gets back from Umrah i will talk to her, but im also praying that after coming back from such a sacred place, she herself will change her ways insh-Allah
    InshaAllaah,

    If she doesn't you know what to do,

    You should have though about the whole moving things before hand,

    At least then you could've stayed with a nearby friend or relative or sort things out properly.

    AsalamuAlaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu.
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    to be honest, i really wasted my whole last year, every decision i made, i made due to a guy. im full of regrets now thou, i messed up my whole 1st year :-(
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    to be honest, i really wasted my whole last year, every decision i made, i made due to a guy. im full of regrets now thou, i messed up my whole 1st year :-(

    Ahh sis, forget your past now,

    I hope you repented loads and loads (sincerely) after that don't mention it again,

    Good girl =)

    I just realised, you're not the thread starter, how confusing woman!
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    whoops! sorry

    and JazakAllah
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    Re: living arrangements

    sis Fozia,

    Alhamdulilah you've moved on from your past so dont dwell on it insha'Allah. What matters now is what steps u take to remove the remaining haram from ur life. May Allah (swt) bless you sis. Ameen.

    WassalamuAlaykum
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    Re: living arrangements

    format_quote Originally Posted by F0z14 View Post
    whoops! sorry

    and JazakAllah
    Don't be,

    Am sure the threadstarter may benefit from some of the posts,

    Wa Iyyaki, Nighty night *ZzZz*
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    JazakAllah Sister Jolie, i love you sis u know that! u trully make my heart feel at ease with ur kind words!

    yes u are right, i hope the other sis does benefit, sorry 4 taking over ur post sis, my intial intention was to give u advice! sorry sis
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    Re: living arrangements

    JazakAllah khayr sis, BarakAllahu feeki, Its uni accomodation right?

    I'll be off insha'Allah since its OT.
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    F0z14's Avatar Full Member
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    Re: living arrangements

    its uni but also kind of private? its student accomodation but not direct from uni. the thing is for me to move out i have 2 sort something out 4 my friend, and there are no spare rooms left in the building that we can change to so its a tricky situation. but insh-Allah my plan is to stay out of the way and only go into kitchen and stuff when i need to
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