I'm having a baby that i didn't want.

sis just reading through your first post again how do you mean it has not been confirmed by a doctor? a doctor would certainly be able to confirm it by a simple urine sample and the symtoms that you would get along with being pregnant like a missed period would be a first indicator or what ever else those doctors do nowadays would be able to tell you straight away whether your pregnant or not did you take a pregnancy test? clear blue is 99percent accurate and it can detect pregnancy hormones 3 or 4days after sexual intercourse so sis i am highly confused. are you even sure you are pregnant and its not the stress of thinking that your pregnant thats delaying your period?

sister may Allah make everything easy for you inshaAllah. i'll advice you to speak to a scholar. islam does not allow boyfriend and girlfreind, so if this brother is willing to marry you, then he should do it it islamically. if not, then i'll advice you to stay away from each other and repent to Allah. then again i know he cant stay away from your life as he is the father of your baby and you'll need his financial support but just drob this idea of 'OH'.

may Allah make eaverything easy for you ameen.

wasalaamu aleykum

i know people are telling you to tell your parents but hmmm obviously if youre keeping the baby which i hope you are, they will somehow find out though i can understand why you telling them would be a problem. with other things you may be able to hide but with a baby, not much reasons to explain how you got it. and if youre pregnant youre just gonna get bigger and fatter.(sucky part lol) and in that time you will be visiting them too? first things first, make sure 100% that you are. home pregnancy tests are pretty accurate and saves you from having to visit a doc. do that firstly.
the best thing i can advise is that you ask a scholar and sincerely repent. It seems complicated, i dont know the exact ruling for getting married when pregnant as i thought the iddah period had to be observed?

btw whats OH stand for anyway?

format_quote Originally Posted by markislam

tell you parents they will get mad but will be cool in few months. dont hide things, it will be hard but just do it.

is this guy a muslim ?

Anonymous mentioned in the first post.
"I am getting a lot of support from my OH and some of his family (he will tell his parents once it is confirmed) and also some close friends. I'm also in education at university, living away from my family home. (We're both Muslim). "

I can't imagine, some Muslims teenagers are capable to do sex outside marriage even though they knew it is forbidden. Western cultures are open anything but NOT ours.



Hopefully, you will keep your FIRST baby, not abortion topic. Try to work out with your boyfriend as repent to Allah (SWT) ASAP. Unfortunately, some people have no time to repent after child born due to busy and more arguments in young ages.

sis thats great to hear i will make duaa for you tonight it all works out for the best inshaAllah and of course the baby take care of yourself and your soon to be husband dose justice with you AMEEN

format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender

Hello, in regards to your post, we have sat down and spoken about this properly and we have decided that marriage would be the best option since i am living far away from my parents anyways, and continuing with an unlawful relationship would just over-complicate things with his side of the family. As far as i'm concerned, my family should happily allow us to get married and the pregnancy should not be a problem in the later stages. If the marriage is not valid however, we will re-marry after the birth of this child (inshallah). This is for the sake of our parents happiness and well-being.

Also, some of you might be aware upon reading my other posts that i have visited the doctors today which have confirmed that i am 3 weeks pregnant.

Please everyone make dua for us and thank you all for your advice and support. I will keep you in my prayers (inshallah).

I have read some comments against sister "cat eyes" comments and i would please like you to stop doing that as she has apologised to me and this is a public forum where she is entitled to what she says and how she says regarding her views. Thanks again.

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, I have found this question and answer which is similar to your situation and thought it was answered VERY well and is very informative so thought i would paste it for you to read for your own knowledge and also to encourage you that marriage is incumbant on you as soon as possible:

As far as the child is concerned, if the child is born six months or more after the time of marriage (nikah), paternity will be established and the child will be attributed to the husband. However, if the child is born before six months have elapsed, it will not be attributed to the husband. (Radd al-Muhtar, 3/49)

So marriage should take place at least 6 months before the birth of the child if it is to be Islamically attributed to the father.

DOES THE INTENTION OF NIKAH JUSTIFY ZINA?

Question: I am a young teenage girl just out of High school. I was going steady with a Muslim boy for 2 years. I relaxed myself with him as he pledged to marry me. However, now that I am pregnant he says that he cannot marry me since his mother is not happy. What should we do? Disobey his mother or should I just forget him?

Answer

Response from the Fatwa Department ……..

Allah Ta’ala says, “And do not venture anywhere near (the act) of Zina (adultery) for it is indeed a transgression and an evil way.” (Surah Al-Israa, verse 32)

Before addressing the query, we wish to emphasize on the point that all types of contact between non-Mahram males and females is strictly prohibited. Talking, interacting, chatting, etc is Haraam and strongly condemned in the Shariah as is evident from the above verse of the Qur’aan.

In the afore-mentioned verse all ways which engender adultery are prohibited. This verse is an eloquent expression of the prohibition of the ways and acts which are introductory to adultery. Thus adultery as well as all avenues to adultery are forbidden. Imam Bukhari Rahimahullah has stated a Hadeeth on the authority of Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah Radhiyallahu anhu that Rasulullah Sallallahu alaihi wasallam said:

"The adultery of the eyes is evil looks. The adultery of the feet is to walk towards the sin. The adultery of the tongue is lustful talk. The adultery of the heart is the evil desire and in the end the sexual organs testify all this or deny it."

In another Hadeeth, Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wasallam said:

"The hands also commit adultery, their adultery is touching; the feet also commit adultery, their adultery is walking towards adultery; the mouth also commits adultery, its adultery is kissing." (Muslim, Abu Dawood)

Chatting to non-Mahrams of the opposite gender on the cell phone and internet is also regarded as Zina of the hands.

In a Hadeeth narrated by Sayyiduna Samurah Radiyallaahu anhu regarding a dream of Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, it is mentioned that Jibra’eel and Mika’eel Alaihimas salaam came to Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and took him to a certain place, Nabi Sallallaahu Alaihi Wasallam said, "We walked until we came to something that looked like an oven. Its top section was narrow and the inside was broad. From it sounds of screaming were heard."

Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam further says: "We looked inside and we saw naked men and women. We also saw flames from beneath them. When these flames scorched them, they screamed." I asked Jibra’eel Alaihis Salaam: "Who are these people?" He replied, "These are the males and females who committed the grave act of Zina. This will be their punishment till the day of Qiyaamah." (Bukhari).

The Harms of Zina [Adultery and Fornication] are Manifold

1. Allah Ta’ala becomes very angry.
2. The reckoning in the hereafter will be very severe.
3. The person will enter Jahannam.
4. The Barakah (blessing) of his Rizq (sustenance) is lost.
5. He is deprived from doing good.
6. He becomes hated and cursed in the eyes of the common people.
7. The nation involved in Zina will be afflicted with droughts, plagues and previously unheard of sicknesses
8. The destruction of the locality.
9. The cause of earthquakes.
10. The birth of illegitimate children.

It is indeed unfortunate that some of our Muslim brothers and sisters have lost their morals and values and have discarded the natural veils of modesty with which Allah Ta’ala has blessed us. Those involved in this horrendous sin of Zina should immediately make Taubah and beg Allah Ta’ala for forgiveness together with making the firm intention of never to return to this vile and wretched deed again.

The consequences of Zina are disastrous, especially upon females. Let alone the punishments she will have to face in the Aakhirah and the feeling of disgrace and being a cheap and loose girl who has given up her chastity, in many cases, she goes through the misfortune of being dumped after being used by her partner.


Your situation is just one of the numerous similar situations that have come to our attention. In almost all cases of illicit relationships, the girl is used by the boy just to satisfy his lust. The poor girl gets carried away by the boys charming ways and his show of love and affection for her as well as his promises of marriage to her but is ignorant of the ulterior motives of the boy. Although he may be showing her such love, compassion and devotion, the object that lurks under all this is just one; to use her for the satisfaction of his lust. Many a times, the girl possesses high morals and sound Islamic values but for the sake of maintaining her relationship with the boy, she discards her veils of chastity and stoops to the low level of committing the deplorable act of Zina. Unfortunately, this does not ultimately help her relationship as the goal of the boy is to use her and thereafter, settle down with a decent and innocent girl when the time for marriage approaches.

Take a look around and see how many illicit relationships prior to marriage end up in marriage? Very few will be ones deduction. Why? Because the boy wanted a good time prior to marriage and now that it is time for him to get married he wants a decent and even pious girl who will be an obedient and loyal wife. Not someone who has no self respect and dignity. That girl from whom he had snatched away her self respect and chastity is no more to him than a used bin bag.

We therefore implore all the Muslim girls to adopt the full Shar’ee Hijab, externally and internally and abstain from all types of non-permissible interaction with males. We also emphatically urge the young Muslim girls to never ever give up their chastity and Islamic values under any circumstance as this always end up in disaster and the girl always suffers the most as she falls victim to false and hollow promises that outwardly seem to be genuine.

In your situation, we suggest that you tie the sacred knot of Nikah with the consent of your parents. It is not permissible to abort the child.

If one wishes success in this world and the hereafter, it is important to obey one’s parents. This is a strict command of Allah and disobedience to parents leads to hardship and misfortune in this world and the hereafter.

It is therefore important that parents inculcate the correct values and morals in their children and monitor their activities in order to save them from falling prey to such vices. The following should be adopted as mandatory:

a) Parents should not allow their children in those environments where there is intermingling of sexes.
b) Children should not be allowed cell phones and internet access regardless of their age. If, for some reason, there is a need to provide these facilities for the child, it should be well monitored.
c) Cell phones should always be in the open and not hidden. Parents should browse through the text messages of their children as well as their mobile applications. Chat applications like MXIT and Mig33 etc. are taboo and are a clear indication that the bearer of such applications is up to no good and is most probably involved in some Haraam.
d) Mothers should take their daughters to Islamic programs regularly.

Remember, the sin of the child is the sin of the mother and father if they did not:

a) Impart proper Deeni education;
b) Inculcate correct Islamic values; and:
c) Did not get them married when they were of marriageable age.


In conclusion, parents are urged to look after their children and adopt every possible method to ensure that they are saved from all harm and vices. Also, the Ummah at large, males and females are urged to observe the laws of Hijab at all times. This will bring down the mercy of Allah Ta’ala and will also bring comfort to ones home and life.

May Allah guide us all and assist us in abstaining from all types of sins, Ameen.

Source:http://www.jamiat.org.za/index.php?o...no-3&Itemid=60

s regards your question, following is what the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, states in his well-known book, The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam:

“While Islam permits preventing pregnancy for valid reasons, it does not allow doing violence to it once it occurs.

Muslim jurists have agreed unanimously that after the fetus is completely formed and has been given a soul, abortion is haram. It is also a crime, the commission of which is prohibited to the Muslim because it constitutes an offense against a complete, living human being. Jurists insist that the payment of blood money (diya) becomes incumbent if the baby is aborted alive and then died, while a fine of lesser amount is to be paid if it is aborted dead.

However, there is one exceptional situation. If, say the jurists, after the baby is completely formed, it is reliably shown that the continuation of the pregnancy would necessarily result in the death of the mother, then, in accordance with the general principle of the Shari`ah, that of choosing the lesser of two evils, abortion must be performed. The reason for this is that the mother is the origin of the fetus; moreover, her life is well-established, with duties and responsibilities, and she is also a pillar of the family. It would not be possible to sacrifice her life for the life of a fetus which has not yet acquired a personality and which has no responsibilities or obligations to fulfill.

Imam al-Ghazzali makes a clear distinction between contraception and abortion, saying that contraception is not like abortion. Abortion is a crime against an existing being. It follows from this that there are stages of existence. The first stages of existence are the settling of the semen in the womb and its mixing with the secretions of the woman. Then come the next gestational stage. Disturbing the pregnancy at this stage is a crime. When it develops further and becomes a lump, aborting it is a greater crime. When it acquires a soul and its creation is completed, the crime becomes more grievous. The crime reaches a maximum seriousness when it is committed after it (the fetus) is separated (from the mother) alive.”
...............................
the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Brother, first of all, we’d like to say that we are impressed by your question, which emanates from a thoughtful heart. May Allah Almighty help us all adhere to the principles of this true religion, Islam, and enable us to be among the dwellers of Paradise in the Hereafter, Ameen.

First of all, it is to be stated that Islam forbids abortion in all stages of pregnancy. When the pregnancy reaches 120 days old, abortion becomes totally forbidden and is deemed a form of murder that results in compensation becoming liable. If abortion is done prior to this period, no compensation is liable but one should ask forgiveness and promise never to commit it again. In addition, it is highly recommended to do much righteous deeds such as giving in charity, etc.

In response to the question in point, the European Council for Fatwa and Research, issued the following fatwa:

Indeed, abortion is forbidden in Islam whether it be in the earlier stages of pregnancy or otherwise. The extent of sin incurred varies according to the stage of pregnancy, so that less sin would be incurred if the abortion took place during the early stages, while it becomes increasingly haram (unlawful) as the pregnancy advances. When the pregnancy reaches 120 days old, abortion becomes totally forbidden and is deemed a form of murder that results in compensation becoming liable. This compensation is equal in value to 213 grams of gold, and it is given to the heir who did not participate in the abortion (i.e., brother/sister or grandparent(s), etc., according to the laws of inheritance).

However, the only condition under which abortion is allowed is when there is an actual threat to the life of the mother confirmed by an official medical report that if the pregnancy advances any further, the mother may die.

Given the above, since the abortion was done in the case in hand before the fetus was 120 days old, then no compensation is liable. However, it remains a sin, which one should ask forgiveness for and promise never to commit again. If the mother wishes to give in charity besides all this, then that is even better. Allah Almighty says in the Qur'an: (Verily, the good deeds omit the bad deeds… ) (Yunus 10: 114)

You can also read:
http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/S...=1119503547110

Even if my brother wants to marry you, u should wait to deliver u baby and not his because it is son of zina even he marries u after u delivery but not before.

format_quote Originally Posted by transition?

Sister, you are in my du'as. May Allah strengthen your heart and Have mercy on your soul.
:hug:

format_quote Originally Posted by mariyyah

Alaikoum Asslam ,

Sister what you have done called zina and it is the biggest sin and it is haram , First of all repent forgood AND FOREVER to ALLAH SWT and hope INSHALLAH ALLAH SWT forgive you

Second dont tell your family anything about it especially if you are in an other country far from them because you will damage them and you could cause a big problem and health problems to them as well

Third talk to your OH to marry you as soon as possible in the islam you are allowed to marry and there is no evidence about during pregnency women shouldnt marry that wrong so marry him as soon as possible baby should have a father and after that tell your family that you get marry because you need protection from zina and haram and im sure they will be very happy any parents are happy that their daughters or sons get married so please go ahead and be brave and ALLAH SWT with you and INSHALLAH ALLAH SWT forgive you AMEEN

format_quote Originally Posted by ardianto

You are their daughter, sister. Your parents must know everything that happened with you. Good news or bad news.


If you tell your parents now, they must be angry. But if you tell your parents after you have kid, they must be very very very angry.


They must be ready, they always ready.


Believe me, soon or later they will forgive you.


I am really sorry sister, if my advice is different than other member. But that is because I am a parent.

yeah this can i say 2 MAy Allah forgive you Ameen sister repent to Allah SWT

format_quote Originally Posted by AnonymousGender

I have also been advised that marriage during a womens pregnancy will be considered as invalid.

May Allah forgive u . I read in that case she is allowed to marry the person with whom she committed zina .

And Allah knows Best.

why dnt u just get married right now make a small marriage nikah find the shaykh to do it.

Also make taubah