Attitudes to Parents

Acting with parents

Salaam

The Quran tells every Muslim to do the best for their parents. I’m worried by this like if I’m not doing enough and need to do more. Also my parents have been emotionally abusive so how do I deal with them then.

Abuse from parents

Salaam

If a parent has raped a child and beaten a child. Can the child leave them as being with them will only make things worse for them.

Jazzakallahu Khair.

Salaam

What defines as doing the best for our parents? Do we have to be under constant stress wondering if we’re doing enough. Is it enough to be kind and tolerant with them or do we have to do extra? Is it haraam to just be normal with your parents?
I would really appreciate an elaboration on this thank you.

Jazzakallahu Khair.

ameerkam said:

Salaam

What defines as doing the best for our parents? Do we have to be under constant stress wondering if we’re doing enough. Is it enough to be kind and tolerant with them or do we have to do extra? Is it haraam to just be normal with your parents?
I would really appreciate an elaboration on this thank you.

Jazzakallahu Khair.

Click to expand...

Just do not do what these children did to their father to your parent(s) and build from there. Simply watch this video and observe a dead dad's scream to how his children treated him.

Salaam

I’ve heard that you need to achieve “ihsaan” with your parents (perfection) and according to Noiman Ali Khan, anything less than that is a sin. Was this meant as an exaggeration because as human beings we aren’t at are best all the time and I’m constantly worried I’m doing haraam if I’m not doing the best for my parents.
Are there any other interpretations of this?

Jazzakallahu Khair.

Situation with Parents

Assalamualaikum

My father and mother have said to me that I can listen or not listen to what they say (they said something like: “whatever I’m telling you is advice and you can do what you want with it”.
Is this permissible because as their son I am meant to do about everything they ask of me. Is it confirmed to be haraam that they let their children have free rein in a sense?

Jazzakallahu Khair

Attitude to parents

Assalamualaikum

If a parent tells you to do something that you don’t want to do can I discuss it with them? And perhaps persuade them that I don’t have to a particular thing?

Jazzakallahu Khair

Re: Attitude to parents

ameerkam said:

Assalamualaikum

If a parent tells you to do something that you don’t want to do can I discuss it with them? And perhaps persuade them that I don’t have to a particular thing?

Jazzakallahu Khair

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Greetings bro,

Of course you can discuss anything, for they are close to you and are willing to help you in ayway they can. You can ask their permission to do a certain thing, that would be a nice think from you.

In my opinion, if a child towards his parrents does what he wills, then he or she has become a rebel.

You can ask like "may I stop doing this or that?" and them wait for their replay, if they say no, it is fine, if they say "permission granted" then it is more than excellent. But, depends on what you ask.Dont be shy, it is something encourageble. Myself I ask my Christian mom's permission to stay at home one day without going to school, and she says "permission denied" because she knows whats the best for me even though I may think that I know what is good for me. Ypur parents knows best for you.

Re: Abuse from parents

ameerkam said:

Salaam

If a parent has raped a child and beaten a child. Can the child leave them as being with them will only make things worse for them.

Jazzakallahu Khair.

Click to expand...

Assalamu alaikum

Have your parents done that to you?

ameerkam said:

Salaam

What defines as doing the best for our parents? Do we have to be under constant stress wondering if we’re doing enough. Is it enough to be kind and tolerant with them or do we have to do extra? Is it haraam to just be normal with your parents?
I would really appreciate an elaboration on this thank you.

Jazzakallahu Khair.

Click to expand...

Be kind, tolerant, make dua for them, maintain family ties, fulfill your parents' right over you (even if they are disbelievers)

If for some reason it is dangerous for you to live with them, or live near them - you can still do the above from a safe distance.

Have a read below for more info :

https://islamqa.info/en/answers/224...ll-short-in-raising-them-and-spending-on-them

https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5326/what-is-the-importance-of-honouring-one146s-parents-in-islam

https://islamqa.info/en/answers/22782/how-should-the-muslim-honour-his-parents

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ameerkam said:

Assalamualaikum

If a parent tells you to do something that you don’t want to do can I discuss it with them? And perhaps persuade them that I don’t have to a particular thing?

Jazzakallahu Khair

Click to expand...

If they are telling you to do something that is against Islam, then it is forbidden for you to do it - try explain it kindly and clearly to your parents.

[h=2]And We have enjoined upon man goodness to parents. But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them. To Me is your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do. (29:8)[/h]