Non-Muslim Friends

format_quote Originally Posted by muslim_friend

My best friend is a Hindu. Should i break my relations with him? I've known him since i was 6 years old.

Ever since i got 'into' Islam about 2-3 months back, i've sorta developed a disgust for the the non muslim's beliefs. And this is increasing everyday.I don't hate the kaafir, the least i would do is feel pity for him. But i find it absurd to be a friend to someone who has betrayed our Master.

I thought of the idea of being in touch with him so that i can try and convert him to Islam, but can this be called hypocrisy?

What should I do now? I haven't met him in a long time, and he sends text messages to me via phone.. should i keep replying? I need some sound advice.

I am not a Muslim, so my reply may be of limited use to you. But I am sure Muslims brothers and sisters will join this thread to give you their advice.

My response would be this:

If it's not long since you 'got into Islam', this may be your time for adjusting to your new faith. Part of that adjustment may be suddenly realising how different other people are (or perhaps, how different you are now? )
Things will spring out at you, which you now find wrong or even 'disgusting', which you have never minded or even noticed before!
That's probably a good thing, because God is working in you, and changing you.

However, when I get these feelings of what I would call 'self-righteousness' (i.e. feeling that I am better than others), I personally take that as a sign that I need to step back and humble myself before God.
As a Christian I believe that I am no better than the next person, and that I fall short of God's commands as much as my neighbour.
I don't know what Islam says about this, but I believe that as a human being I have no right to judge others. They are as much part of God's creation as I am - and I do not know what God's plans are for any of us!

So my advice would be, not to burn your bridges with your friend, but to remain friends and share your faith with him - providing he is willing.

I should also say ( and this may sound like a contradiction), that there is a place for surrounding yourself with fellow believers and choosing friends within your own faith.
This may be especially the case if you are new to your faith and need guidance and support.
But I would not go as far as advising you to break all contact with non-Muslims.

Perhaps this helps. Wait and see what others recommend!

Peace! :thankyou:

format_quote Originally Posted by muslim_friend

Ever since i got 'into' Islam about 2-3 months back, i've sorta developed a disgust for the the non muslim's beliefs. And this is increasing everyday.I don't hate the kaafir, the least i would do is feel pity for him. But i find it absurd to be a friend to someone who has betrayed our Master.

Is this an extremist's view?

Did Allah not create all? Who are you to say he has betrayed the master, when we were all created, and do as is the will of God!!

format_quote Originally Posted by AvarAllahNoor

Is this an extremist's view?

Did Allah not create all? Who are you to say he has betrayed the master, when we were all created, and do as is the will of God!!

I see what your saying bro and in part i agree with you. But i understand the bro's point. before i started practising i used to have many non-muslims friends, and still do, i just don't chill with them like i used to

Basically when i started practising i wanted to stop swearing, stop talking about girls saying how fit they are as i felt it was wrong to lower the status of women to just sexual attractions, also i wanted to stop backbiting. When i was in a mosque or around pious muslims friends it was easier for me to avoid doing this, but as soon as i got around my non-muslims friends i started talking about these issues again. It was the wrong environment. To my non-muslim friends that kinda talk is perfectly normal, but to me constantly backbiting about someone as a joke, or making fun of someone even though he doesn't like it, or continually staring at a girl just ebcause she's pretty is immoral, and i felt i needed to change my company. i still see them and try and give them da'wah (invitation to islam) whenever i play football with them, but even there there is continual swearing and cheating which i don't like

I'll give you an example og how i feel on swearing. i used to swear all the time. Wouldn't care where or who in front of. Then gradually i realised i shouldn't in front of my younger bros and sisters. It would be extremely hard for me to refrain from swearing in front of them. Then gradually i wanted to stop swearing completely. It was hard, and eachj time i had a slip i would feel extremely guilty, so it went from not wanting to swear because it was against my religion, to not wanting to swear because it was wrong. Now today i feel uneasy even if i hear others swear such is my dislike for swearing, and in non-muslim environments they don't usually see it as a problem


Muslim friend. There is nothing wrong with beng friends with him, as long as it doesn't deter you from your deen. For example a lot of times muslims stop practising in front of their friends. they'll go cinema or something or go park and will feel embarressed to stop and pray. In such instances you should refrain from hanging around with them. But ideally you should go with them and stop and pray infront of them and gently give them da'wah

format_quote Originally Posted by Mohsin

Muslim friend. There is nothing wrong with beng friends with him, as long as it doesn't deter you from your deen. For example a lot of times muslims stop practising in front of their friends. they'll go cinema or something or go park and will feel embarressed to stop and pray. In such instances you should refrain from hanging around with them. But ideally you should go with them and stop and pray infront of them and gently give them da'wah

That makes sense, if i too had friends who were a bad unfluence i would not retain that same bond.

I didn't agree to the way he said his friend had 'betrayed the master' :rant:

no..no.. i'm not a convert. That's why i put the 'into' within quotes.. what i meant was.. 2-3 months ago i wasn't a good muslim but i changed later and started praying etc.. Alhumdulillah. LOL. Sorry for making everyone misunderstand.

format_quote Originally Posted by Ayesha Rana

Yes Glo is right bro. Islam does not forbid being friends with non-muslims, it only forbids us from taking them as friends and protectors over muslims.

I hope you are right. it wil be difficult to break away from someone whom i have shared the best moments of my life with. i didn't understand what you meant by 'friends and protectors'?

I think you should remain friends with him. Since he is your friend and has not yet received guidance it is up to you to show him the straight path. Teach him what Islam is really about. It does not encourage breaking ties so think of it as an opportunity to guide your friend. If you care for him then try and get him into Jannah Insha'Allah. May Allah help you.

format_quote Originally Posted by Umm_Shaheed

If you continue to be friends with him then you may have a good influence on him. However you should not hold him as a best friend, and make sure that any unislamic mannerisms don't rub off on you.

Well, what i am worried about is hypocrisy.What you are telling me, is to befriend him so that i can show him islam.. but whenever i would get to meet him, he will not know that my true intentions would only be to convert him to islam.he will expect me to be the same good ol' friend, so.. that would make me feel bad. a smile on my face before i convey the message to him, and a frown on my face if he happens to reject it. what u think about this?

Or perhaps, before i try doing daawah to him, i should tell him that my intention is to try and convert him to Islam?

JazakAllah for the replies. thanks for ur effort. but waiting for more answers.

format_quote Originally Posted by Mohsin

Muslim friend. There is nothing wrong with beng friends with him, as long as it doesn't deter you from your deen. For example a lot of times muslims stop practising in front of their friends. they'll go cinema or something or go park and will feel embarressed to stop and pray. In such instances you should refrain from hanging around with them. But ideally you should go with them and stop and pray infront of them and gently give them da'wah

Just saw ur post. Thanks bro, good advice.But if i may ask, is it possible to prove ur point from Qur'an and sunnah? i hope i'm not asking too much.

format_quote Originally Posted by AvarAllahNoor

I didn't agree to the way he said his friend had 'betrayed the master' :rant:

But i'm just being realistic. To me, the truth behind things is far more important that what i would desire it to be.

AsalamuAlaykum,

If problems arise between you and your non-Muslim friend you don't run away but solve the problems you are having

Also as a practicing Muslim now...it is your job to give da'wah...invite him to Islam if he is willing to listen to you inshaAllah and that is the best thing for you now...

Don't get yourself into a position where you think you are better than him...

And Allahu Alum (Allah knows best)

WalaykumSalaam.

format_quote Originally Posted by yasin

Does Islam not preach understanding and acceptance?

Would our prophet give up his friends because they arent Muslims?

That should answer your question

That's the point i was making.

salaam


bro u sudnt develop a disgust lol, it says in many hadiths that dont cuss sum1 religion or have hatred towards it, because they will do the same for to ur religion!!!

ISLAM MEANS PEACE!!

brother i have a few non muslim mateys & i think of them as normal mateys, obviosly a bond with a muslim matey is different, like i wud drink from the same bottle that a muslim has used but wudnt do it, with a non muslim because theres a bond innit, but islam dont permit us 2 b racist or not 2 hav friends dat r non muslim, we r encouraged to keep them. also bro set d best example u can of bein a muslim cos maybe inshallah ur friend will like sumthing about islam and he may decide to convert inshallah!!

but that doesnt mean that u constantly try 2 convert him lol, jus be his friend as you were before & me kinda agrees with not keepin him as a best friend, because this may come in the way of ur islamic duties i.e imagine u wana go n pray Jummah in a mosque & hes wit u, you wont be able 2 do that,

also 1 important we are all Allah (swt) creations! he created us all, so we cant be bad 2 his creation

inshallah Allah (swt) will help ya

we all bruvas and siters init chacha!!!!!!!

BIG HUG!!!!!!!! :X

format_quote Originally Posted by muslim_friend

Just saw ur post. Thanks bro, good advice.But if i may ask, is it possible to prove ur point from Qur'an and sunnah? i hope i'm not asking too much.

bro what exactly from my text would need clarification from Qur'an and Sunnah. All i've simply said akhi is there's nothing wrong with continuing to be their friend as long as they don't deter you from your deen. Nowhere in the Qur'an does it say you can't befriend non-muslims. it says don't take them as protectors over you meaning don't be such close friends that your deen is comprimised.

Now you ask about being hypocritical. Well you're not really. Tell me what's the best possible way you can be of a friend to your non-muslim friend, whats the best possible gift you can give him, what will make him most happy upon accepting such a gift. The answer of course is Islam, with a ticket to Jannah. Theres nothing hypocritical about this, you are trying to be a good friend saving him from the hell-fire

I found a really good article for you on islam-online

Question: A Greek Christian friend of mine came to me and said that he wanted a book that guides him to the way a man should live. I handed him a copy of the Qur'an. He took deep interest in reading it until he came across the following verse: [O ye who believe! Take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily God guideth not a people unjust.] (Al-Ma’dah 5: 51)

Reading the verse, he asked "why is that so?" Why is your book telling you that we can't be your friends? Does that mean I can't be your friend? And at his request I am seeking help from you to throw some light on it. I am too confused by this. And if that is so then why does Islam allow us to marry Christian and Jewish girls (despite the fact they might not want to change their religion.) Please reply soon

Answer:In the first place, we would like to stress that Islam urges all Muslims to deal kindly and justly with all people. Muslims should have good relations with all people. At school, at work, in your neighborhood, etc., you should be kind and courteous to everyone. Muslims are allowed to have non-Muslims as friends as long as they keep their own faith and commitment to Islam pure and strong. Allah has clearly forbidden Muslims from fighting those who fight not their faith or drive them out from their homes. Referring to this, [Allah forbids you not with regard to those who fight you not for your faith, nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them. For Allah loves those who are just. Allah only forbids you with regard to those who fight you for your faith, and drive you out of your homes and support others in driving you out, from turning to them for protection (or taking them as wali). Those who seek their protection they are indeed wrong- doers.] (Al-Mumtahinah 60: 8-9)
In his response to the question, Dr. Muzammil Siddiqi, President of the Fiqh Council ofNorth America, states:

The Qur'an does not say that non-Muslims cannot be Muslims' friends, nor does it forbid Muslims to be friendly to non-Muslims. There are many non-Muslims who are good friends of Muslim individuals and the Muslim community. There are also many good Muslims who truly and sincerely observe their faith and are very friendly to many non-Muslims at the same time.

Rest Of Answer

format_quote Originally Posted by muslim_friend

Just saw ur post. Thanks bro, good advice.But if i may ask, is it possible to prove ur point from Qur'an and sunnah? i hope i'm not asking too much.

You want his point from the Quran and Sunnah?

Try this :

http://alghazzali.org/resources/articles/friendship.pdf

Wa'salaam

-Zubair

format_quote Originally Posted by chacha_jalebi

we are all Allah (swt) creations! he created us all, so we cant be bad 2 his creation

Exactly!

Tis ok to have non-muslim friends. My first friend ever was non-muslim.