Asexuality

Could someone tell me what Islam says about ASEXUALITY? I am getting to the age of marriage and my brother is putting a lot of pressure on me but I have no intention of getting married.

I know it's normal to get married blah blah blah but I have been never interested in women in that way. The thought of sex and being naked in front of someone makes me want to throw up. Before anyone asks, I am not gay. That is even more disgusting.

If my brother gets his way and forces me to marry, won't the Missus have rights? If she wants hanky panky, won't I have to do it with her? :embarrass:embarrass:embarrass:embarrass

Cheers.

Just to add. I know a wife/husband is a part of life. Who do you tell about problems if you are not married. I tend to keep things to myself. I'm a private person as it is.

Sayyid Qutb never married and he is a hero of mine learning about him when I was 17 is one of the reasons why I converted/reverted to Islam I have his book milestones and I own 2 books written about his life written by non muslim authors that defend hi also I have a Muslim friend that is ASexual so why not he is 20 years of age.


Qutb never married, in part because of his steadfast religious convictions. While the urban Egyptian society he lived in was becoming more Westernized, Qutb believed the Quran taught women that 'Men are the managers of women's affairs ...'[SUP][19][/SUP] Qutb lamented to his readers that he was never able to find a woman of sufficient "moral purity and discretion" and had to reconcile himself to bachelorhood.[SUP][20]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sayyid_Qutb

Qutb never married, because, he claimed, he could not find a woman pure enough to fit his ideal, and willing to satisfy his notions of the subservient place of women in Islam. His obsession with sexual purity, the fact that he never married and apparently had no sexual contacts.

http://www.mideastweb.org/Middle-East-Encyclopedia/sayyid_qutb.htm

Qutb reconciled himself to a life of bachelorhood; he never married.

http://books.google.com/books?id=Y9pMAgAAQBAJ&pg=PA110&lpg=PA110&dq=sayyid+qutb+never+married&source=bl&ots=UeHn8Mpibq&sig=aO9S8wnxZslQo9IgVMzqj6nLw8U&hl=en&sa=X&ei=aYxvVJyzKYuqNrO0hKgP&ved=0CFcQ6AEwCA#v=onepage&q=sayyid%20qutb%20never%20married&f=false[/SUP]

Yes, she'd have rights. If you don't want to be intimate, then you shouldn't get married. It's unfair on your wife.

Every human is created to have sexual desire that will appear when he/she reach puberty age. However, what taught to, or experienced, or received by someone during childhood can make him/her build a 'system' that automatically block sexual desire. Like described in your post which you are convinced that thought about sex and being naked in front of someone is disgusting thing, so it makes you want to throw up. Maybe it's because you grew up in environment which talk about sex considered taboo and fall in love is inappropriate thing.

Being asexual itself is not sin. This is what I can say about asexuality in Islam. And I agree with brother Alpha Dude. Don't force yourself to get married if you still can't able to remove your 'blockade' on your sexual desire, because it will cause problem in your married life.

ardianto said:

Every human is created to have sexual desire that will appear when he/she reach puberty age. However, what taught to, or experienced, or received by someone during childhood can make him/her build a 'system' that automatically block sexual desire. Like described in your post which you are convinced that thought about sex and being naked in front of someone is disgusting thing, so it makes you want to throw up. Maybe it's because you grew up in environment which talk about sex considered taboo and fall in love is inappropriate thing.

Being asexual itself is not sin. This is what I can say about asexuality in Islam. And I agree with brother Alpha Dude. Don't force yourself to get married if you still can't able to remove your 'blockade' on your sexual desire, because it will cause problem in your married life.

Click to expand...

Just so you know. That is not asexuality :statisfie. What you are talking about is erotophobia which is entirely different. Asexuals exist and they are just people who lack sexual desire from the very get go. I had the pleasure of meeting people who are asexual during the Pride Parade.

If this guy is asexual he will always be asexual. It is like telling a person of a particular ethnicity to change colors; it just ain't happening

I am not really sure what Islam says about being asexual, but, you have to realize there is a difference between not wanting to get intimate with your spouse because you just happen to lack those feelings or whether it's because you have a previous background of sexual abuse or even rape. Undoubtedly going through one of the latter experiences can turn you into an antisexual for that matter. I personally hold the same views as you do about marriage. To me it's not really a necessity unless ofcourse you want to get physical with your spouse, in such conditions it is mandatory to get married as a prerequisite. It's really up to you. I find getting close to someone really disgusting and honestly I can't find myself a plausible reason to get that close in proximity to another person. But then I'm a mess and have a ton of psychological issues to sort out before I can really put myself in a relationship and share myself in that way. So, ultimately it's all good. Though I have to say; your views seem more like they stem from fear and ignorance. Do you just hate the thought of having someone touching you in that way. If you do then maybe you have an undiscovered past you might like to contemplate on. Anyways it's really your decision, and no one can force you to do something you're not comfortable with. You're not alone, if that helps. But it *is* advised in Islam to complete your religion by getting married. It's one of those things that you get rewarded if you do it and not punished if you don't, but it is strongly preferable that a Muslim gets married. These are just my two cents, I hope you find it helpful.
One last note, I think your question is simplifying the matter of marriage to the lowest common denominator, you kind of depicted marriage in a very shallow. Not everyone gets married because they want to get physical with each other. That's what one night stands are for. There is so much more to a marriage than just making love. But I wouldn't really know, you see I don't know what I want from a relationship so yeah. But I agree with you for the most part. It's really disgusting sometimes to think of the physical aspect of marriage. Anywho, good luck to you in all your endeavors.

Hello bro, its verry wierd to be asexuality for me, for example how will you descendants, or how cant it be sexy to see an nice good locking woman ))

Remember Allah knows us better than we know ourselves.

When you are ready to get married Allah will make it happen.

Allah does not burden a soul more than it can bare.

A marriage is a halal relationship and it permitted for wife and husband to look at each others bodies.

Allah will put in your heart confidence brother Inshallah when you meet your other half.