Lowering the gaze – Women and man’s desires

[lowerurgaze]

Lowering the gaze – Women and man’s desires

I begin by asking Allah to cure me of a wide spread disease, the disease of the un-restricted gaze and I pray that He guides me whilst I am writing this and whilst you are reading this inshAllah.

I have long been suffering by giving free reign to my eyes, suffering physically and spiritually, which has brought me to write my thoughts onto paper, or more specifically, onto the medium by which I am causing my destruction, the internet. I pray that Allah guides me through this state of heedlessness that I am in, to bring me our near to Him and into the beauty of Islaam, for what is better than being close to Allah!

You may be suffering from this too, for I have found it is a wide spread disease, common amongst Muslims unfortunately. For years I have been looking at internet sites, looking at women in the street, just to satisfy my sick desire for women. But we must remember, as young single Muslim men, that our purpose in life is not to follow our desires. If it were, there would be no need to Islaam, which is the complete surrender of your soul – and hence your desires – to the One who created us. Therefore, if our desires are not in line with the obligations placed on us by Islaam, we are not Muslim.

The Prophet Muhammad – may Allah bless him and exalt him – said that there is a cure for EVERYTHING, except death. Therefore if you feel trapped, do not – for there is a cure but you must strive if you are going to achieve it. And this striving, is the ultimate difference between Jannah and Jahannam.

Before the cure, ponder over these ayat of Allah:

“Every soul shall have a taste of death
And only on the Day of Judgment shall you be paid your full recompense
Only he who is saved far from the fire
And admitted to the Garden will have obtained the object (of life)
For the life of this world is but goods and chattels of deception” 3:185

“When My servants ask thee concerning Me,
I am indeed close (to them)
I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calleth on Me
Let them also, with a will, listen to My call
And believe in Me
That they may walk in the right way.” 2:185

SubhanAllah! Just think about YOUR Lord, who created you, sustains you, feeds you, clothes you, educates you, loves you, and how many people, just like you are there in this world!

I know it is hard, for the charms of women are many, but keep yourself chaste, it is purer for you. Imagine life with your wife, do you really want these haraam images to be affecting your relationship?

So the cure is simple, if you really want this cure, observe the 3 steps below:
1. Read salat ul fajr every day at its appointed time, in congregation if possible
2. Read the Book of Allah, if you don’t know Arabic, read a translation
3. Pray tahajjud every day, keep perservering, do not give up

BUT! Before you do, regardless of which item it is above, ensure you are doing it for Allah alone and imagine His greatness whilst performing these acts.

Personally, whenever I commit this sin, I keep persisting, but inshAllah I am going to implement the above 3 steps. When I commit the sin, I feel depressed, cannot think or comprehend people, I become shy, my heart turns into a rock and I feel like the scum of society. Why do this when Islaam can enlighten your heart, and provide you with the pleasures of women through marriage.

I leave you with 2 hadith to ponder over:

(10) Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle said, "When it is the last third of the night, our Lord, the Blessed, the Superior, descends every night to the heaven of the world and says, 'Is there anyone who invokes Me (demand anything from Me), that I may respond to his invocation; Is there anyone who asks Me for something that I may give (it to) him; Is there anyone who asks My forgiveness that I may forgive him?' " (Book #75, Hadith #333)


(45) Narrated Abu Huraira: I heard the Prophet saying, "If somebody commits a sin and then says, 'O my Lord! I have sinned, please forgive me!' and his Lord says, 'My slave has known that he has a Lord who forgives sins and punishes for it, I therefore have forgiven my slave (his sins).' Then he remains without committing any sin for a while and then again commits another sin and says, 'O my Lord, I have committed another sin, please forgive me,' and Allah says, 'My slave has known that he has a Lord who forgives sins and punishes for it, I therefore have forgiven my slave (his sin). Then he remains without Committing any another sin for a while and then commits another sin (for the third time) and says, 'O my Lord, I have committed another sin, please forgive me,' and Allah says, 'My slave has known that he has a Lord Who forgives sins and punishes for it I therefore have forgiven My slave (his sin), he can do whatever he likes." (Book #93, Hadith #598)

Oh Allah, help us, forgive us, protect us from Your displeasure, and instill the light of emaan in our hearts. Ameen.