Polygamy in Christianity and Islam

[Nour al Eman]

]Polygamy in the Bible

1- A brief look at polygamy in the Old Testament

Let us look at some of the verses from the Old Testament that allow polygamy:

In Exodus 21:10, a man can marry an infinite amount of women without any limits to how many he can marry.

In 2 Samuel 5:13; 1 Chronicles 3:1-9, 14:3, King David had six wives and numerous concubines.

In 1 Kings 11:3, King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines.

In 2 Chronicles 11:21, King Solomon's son Rehoboam had 18 wives and 60 concubines.

In Deuteronomy 21:15 "If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons...."

There are a lot more verses from the Old Testament that allow polygamy, but I think that the above are sufficient enough to prove my point.


2- Polygamy in the New Testament:

Here is a small quote from a Christian (R.M.) who agrees with Polygamy:

Hello,
I was just reading your article on polygamy. I am a Christian who
actually believes polygamy is a righteous form of marriage. Despite the
modern secular church you probably usually see, there are Christians who
are serious about God and Truth over men's traditions.

Another small quote from a Christian Pastor who agrees with Polygamy:

From: ApostleJamesI@aol.com
Date: Thu, 7 Jun 2001 22:07:57 EDT
Subject: Your statement on Polygamy
To: truthspeaks@answering-christianity.com

Great article for the most part. I am a born-again Christian and a pastor who
not only supports the Biblical teaching of polygamy but I also practice it. I
have two wives and seven children so far....

Before I present the verses from the New Testament that allow polygamy, I first would like to prove to you that Jesus peace be upon him did honor the laws of the Old Testament, and did order his followers (the Christians as we call them) to follow the laws of the Old Testament:

Jesus said: "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law (the Old Testament) or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke or a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law (the Old Testament) until everything is accomplished. (Matthew 5:17-18)"

Christians always say as an excuse "Oh this law doesn't exist in the New Testament, it is only the Old Testament." Well, according to Matthew 5:17-18 above, we clearly see that Jesus honored the Old Testament, and forces Christians to follow the unmodified laws of it that have not been replaced by newer ones in the New Testament. The Old Testament as we clearly see above does indeed allow polygamy without a shadow of a doubt !!.

There is not a single verse from the New Testament that prohibits polygamy. Christians usually mistakenly present the following verses from the Bible to prove that polygamy in the New Testament is not allowed:

Matthew 19:1-12 "1. When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to
the other side of the Jordan.
2. Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3. Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
4. "Haven't you read," he (Jesus) replied, "that at the beginning the Creator `made them male and female,'
5. and said, `For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ?
6. So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
7. "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
8. Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
9. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10. The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11. Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given.
12. For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

In the above verses, we see that Jesus was approached with a question about whether or not it is allowed for a man to divorce his wife in Matthew 19:3. Jesus immediately referred to the Old Testament for the answer in Matthew 19:4. He referred to Adam and Eve, one man and one woman. The Old Testament does talk about the story of Adam and Eve as one husband and one wife. However, the Old Testament which Jesus had referred to in Matthew 19:3 does allow polygamy.

Also, when a man becomes a one flesh with his wife in Matthew 19:5-6, this doesn't mean that the man can't be one flesh with another woman. He can be one flesh with his first wife, and one flesh with his second wife, and one flesh with his third wife and so on.... To further prove this point, let us look at the following from the New Testament:

Matthew 22:23-32 "23. That same day the Sadducees, who say there is no resurrection, came to him with a question.
24. "Teacher," they said, "Moses told us that if a man dies without having children, his brother must marry the widow and have children for him.
25. Now there were seven brothers among us. The first one married and died, and since he had no children, he left his wife to his brother.
26. The same thing happened to the second and third brother, right on down to the seventh.
27. Finally, the woman died.
28. Now then, at the resurrection, whose wife will she be of the seven, since all of them were married to her?"
29. Jesus replied, "You are in error because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God.
30. At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.
31. But about the resurrection of the dead--have you not read what God said to you,
32. `I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob' ? He is not the God of the dead but of the living."

In Matthew 22:24-28, the Jews referred to Deuteronomy 25:5 from the Old Testament where it states that if a woman's husband dies, and she didn't have any kids from him, then she must marry his brother regardless whether he had a wife or not. When the Jews brought this situation up to Jesus in Matthew 22:24-28, Jesus did not prohibit at all for the childless widow to marry her husband's brother (even if he were married). Instead, Jesus replied to them by saying that we do not marry in heaven, and we will be like angels in heaven (Matthew 22:30).

So in other words, if Jesus allowed for a widow to marry her former husband's brother even if he were married, then this negates the Christians' claim about the Bible prohibiting polygamy. A man can be one flesh with more than one woman. In the case of Matthew 22:24-28, the man can be one flesh with his wife, and one flesh with his deceased brother's wife. Also keep in mind that Exodus 21:10 allows a man to marry an infinite amount of women, and Deuteronomy 21:15 allows a man to marry more than one wife.


3- Another rebuttal to Matthew 19:8-9:

I received the following two posts:

Anonymous
Argument Against Polygamy in the Bible
7/04/2005

Matthew 19:8-9

The key thing to note here is that this argument fails if polygamy is acceptable! Jesus' point is that improper divorce does not nullify a marriage, and if the first marriage still stands, then a "second" marriage is adultery--and NOT simply 'polygamy'! This is very clear.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Anonymous
Argument Against Polygamy in the Bible
7/04/2005

Matthew 19:8-9

Jesus' point is that improper divorce does not nullify a marriage, and if the first marriage still stands, then a "second" marriage is adultery--and NOT simply 'polygamy'! This is very clear.



My response:

While the verses that the person raised are posted in the section above, but I'd like to post them again for the reader's convenience:

Matthew 19:8-9
8 Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."


Before I answer the person's posts, I'd like to mention that, first of all, it is important to notice the logical and textual fallacy in the verses. Moses does not permit anything! It was GOD Almighty who supposedly Permitted everything in both the Old Testament and the New one. The reason I am emphasizing on this point, while it might look very minor, is because it goes to further prove that the texts that exist in the Bibles of today, with all of their variant quantity of "books" and "gospels", are not the Original, Pure, unaltered and uncorrupt Holy Word of GOD Almighty. They are rewrites and writings of men's interpretations and narrations of what really took place during Jesus' times, peace be upon him. So what ever you read from the New Testament doesn't mean a whole a lot because it is not the original writing. It is simply man made.

Here is what the Old Testament regarding divorce:

Deuteronomy 24:1-3
1 If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house,
2 and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man,
3 and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies,

This command comes from the book of Deuteronomy, one of the books of the Revelations sent to Moses. Throughout all of Moses' books, we see Commands such as "The LORD of Israel declares.....", and then He gives a series of commands similar to Deuteronomy 24:1-3:

"In the fortieth year, on the first day of the eleventh month, Moses proclaimed to the Israelites all that the LORD had commanded him concerning them. (From the NIV Bible, Deuteronomy 1:3)"

So the statement itself about Moses permitting and not permitting is also poor and self-contradicting in grammar and concept.

I have provided ample evidence from the KJV and NIV Bible's theologians and historians themselves regarding the "books" and "gospels" of these two bibles, admitting with their own writings that these books were actually written by unknown people! Not only that, but they also admit that much of the contents in these books don't even exist in the so-called "early manuscripts." They were added later on.

The reader can visit: http://www.answering-christianity.co...rs_gospels.htm and see the quotes and proofs for themselves.


Now having said all of that, let me now refute the false interpretation of the person above. I will assume for a second that the conversation between Jesus and the questioners did historically take place.

It is, first of all, important to know that the verses were not speaking about polygamy. They were rather addressing divorce. This whole supposed conversation is ambiguous! Nothing in it is clear. Jesus told the polygamist society that he lived among, that if one divorces his wife, unless it is for reason of unfaithfulness, and marries another woman, then he has committed adultery. To me this sounds very ambiguous if one tries to prohibit polygamy through it for the following reasons:

1- No where in the text is polygamy denounced.

2- The man that might fit the case that Jesus spoke about could have been already a polygamist with several wives! This by itself would nullify the prohibition of polygamy.

3- Unlike the person's second post's bogus interpretation above, the text can be more clearly interpreted as Jesus telling the polygamist people back then that they must never divorce, because marriage is something Holy in the Eyes of GOD Almighty. Men must never just divorce for ridiculous reasons as many in the West do today. And for those who act in this evil way, the consequences for them, according to Jesus' "new law", is that they can never marry again, because they have not honored the Holiness of marriage! But if the man, perhaps an already polygamist man, doesn't divorce his wife, then no where in the text does it prohibit him from marrying another woman. Again, the whole text is ambiguous and should've been more clearer to the polygamists that it was addressed to, that if it was indeed intended to prohibit polygamy to begin with.


One last point, again, it is important to realize that the text is in no way a Divine and Perfect Revelation from GOD Almighty as I clearly and irrefutably proved above. It is nothing but a man-made rewrite and an interpretation of what really was spoken by Jesus, peace be upon him. The text, any text - whether it was Jesus' quotes or not, is supposed to be from GOD Almighty alone if you truly wish to call the entire version of the "Bible" that you believe in as the Holy and Divine Word of GOD Almighty.



GOD Almighty can not make a mistake and say "Moses permitted" while it was His Own Holy and Divine Law!





4- My Challenge to all Christians:

Where in the NT do you see a direct condemnation of polygamy? And if I were to become a Christian and I have multiple wives (as some wealthy Muslims have 4 wives), do I have to divorce them and keep just one? If not, then how is polygamy exactly being forbidden in the NT, when it's compromised and allowed for me??

Also, why is the Bible so big on "virgins"? I mean in the Old Testament, we see commands about killing all non virgin women, men and children and keep the virgins: "Now kill all the boys [innocent kids]. And kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man. (From the NIV Bible, Numbers 31:17)"

In the OT, we also see that a virgin is forced to marry her rapist: "If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. (From the NIV Bible, Deuteronomy 22:28)"





5- Some Christians believe that the Old Testament prohibited Polygamy:

Here is an email that I received from a Christian reader. My rebuttal is below her email:

From: "Rachel Thomas" <cinral@hotmail.com>
To: truthspeaks@answering-christianity.com
Subject: (no subject)
Date: Sun, 14 Oct 2001 17:45:28 +0000

mr.Osama..
I do seriously wonder if u will publish any part of my this mail in ur site
..but I cudnt help writing to u.
I only have one verse to quote from the Bible..Deut 17:17 Neither shall he
multiply wives for himself.

this is a commandment that God gave for the kings of his nation but sadly
none of the kings.ie David,Solomon obeyed it and if u will read the whole of
the Bible u will get to see the tragic consequences of their disobedience.So
what u re actually using to support ur theory is a broken commandment..a
source of much grief and trouble.
You have used many verses and derivations to support ur theory but it is
very distorted form the actual truth the Bible contains.
Fear God.
Rachel



My response:

Dear Rachel,

Here is what Deuteronomy 17:17 that you referred me to says in the NIV Bible:

"The king, moreover, must not acquire great numbers of horses for himself or make the people return to Egypt to get more of them, for the LORD has told you, 'You are not to go back that way again.' He must not take many wives, or his heart will be led astray. He must not accumulate large amounts of silver and gold. (From the NIV Bible, Deuteronomy 17:16-17)"

In no way, does Deut 17:17 prohibit polygamy. It prohibited the King from marrying MANY WIVES. I wonder what is the limit to that? Certainly it doesn't limit it to just one wife.

"Many wives" clearly proves: (1) The person can have multiple wives, but not too much; and (2) It doesn't limit marriage to only one wife. I don't know where do you see the verse limiting marriage to only one wife.

Also Rachel, this verse is only talking about kings, or more accurately one lone incident about one king. It sounds very clear to me that it is more like a restriction for the king rather than a general verse that would apply to everybody.

I personally don't care about how many wives the Prophets of the Bible had, and what was the limit of the many wives back then. My point still stands, and that is Polygamy exists in both the OT and the NT in the Bible.

Beside, how can you suggest that the Old Testament prohibited polygamy when for instance Deuteronomy 21:15 clearly states: "If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons...." And also Exodus 21:10 allows a man to marry an infinite amount of women without any limits to how many he can have.

Plus also, you are ignoring the fact that Deuteronomy 17:17 speaks exclusively about kings, or one lone king, and NOT about people in general. So even if your translation was the correct one, it still doesn't disprove anything from my argument.





6- Do Paul's 1 Timothy 3:2 and 1 Timothy 3:12 prove that polygamy is prohibited in the Bible?

Let us look at the verses 1 Timothy 3:2 and 1 Timothy 3:12 from the NIV Bible:

"Now the overseer [some translations have it as "bishop"] must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, (From the NIV Bible, 1 Timothy 3:2)"

"A deacon must be the husband of but one wife and must manage his children and his household well. (From the NIV Bible, 1 Timothy 3:12)"

As we clearly see in those two verses, only church ministers and religious leaders are prohibited from practicing polygamy. There is no mention for ordinary people or general population. So unless every Christian in Christianity is considered a "bishop", "deacon", "priest" or a "minister", then these two verses are without a doubt irrelevant! They do not disprove polygamy in the Bible at all!

In fact if anything, they prove my point about polygamy being allowed in the Bible for the ordinary! Here we clearly see Paul indirectly addressing the practice of polygamy among the "believers", and he only prohibited it to the religious leaders so that perhaps they can have better time and dedication for the church. A man with 10 wives would be too busy for anything and everything.



Have polygamy been really prohibited by Jesus, Paul would not have told his religious leaders to not practice it!!


Paul would not have seen the need for it! It's like him telling them and only them: "Do not worship idols!" That would be a ridiculous request to make on an issue that is crystal clear among the believers. And it would be even more ridiculous if he requested it only from a select few.



The fact that Paul prohibited polygamy only on a select few proves that it is allowed for the general public!



At any rate, Paul is known to have his own agenda and own words inserted into the Bible. In the following verses for instance, we see in the Bible Paul's words and not GOD Almighty's:

"Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. (From the NIV Bible, 1 Corinthians 7:25)"


2 Timothy 4:9-13
9 Do your best to come to me quickly,
10 for Demas, because he loved this world, has deserted me and has gone to Thessalonica. Crescens has gone to Galatia, and Titus to Dalmatia.
11 Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry.
12 I sent Tychicus to Ephesus.
13 When you come, bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas, and my scrolls, especially the parchments.


Titus 3:12-14
12 As soon as I send Artemas or Tychicus to you, do your best to come to me at Nicopolis, because I have decided to winter there.
13 Do everything you can to help Zenas the lawyer and Apollos on their way and see that they have everything they need.
14 Our people must learn to devote themselves to doing what is good, in order that they may provide for daily necessities and not live unproductive lives.

He decided to winter there???

Are these verses Paul's own opinions and commands or are they truly GOD Almighty's UNCOMPROMISED Divine Revelations??





The verses above from Paul contradict his other own verse in 2 Timothy 3:16:

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, (From the NIV Bible, 2 Timothy 3:16)"

If the Bible was truly GOD Almighty's Holy Words, and if Paul was truly GOD Almighty's Apostle, then we wouldn't have this kind of junk in the Bible.

Also another side point, Paul obviously didn't know much about the Old Testament, because the Bible itself admits that it is corrupted and not perfect. So it can never be "All God-breathed":

"`How can you say, "We [the Jews] are wise, for we have the law of the LORD," when actually the lying pen of the scribes has handled it falsely?' (From the NIV Bible, Jeremiah 8:8)"

Another corruption from Paul is his disagreements and fights with the other disciples who were more authentic than him, since they lived with and saw Jesus, while he never even once saw Jesus. Most of the New Testament is nothing but conversations between people, which are clearly not inspirations from GOD Almighty. For instance, Paul fought with Saint Peter and accused him of being "clearly in the wrong" (Galatians: 2:11-12), and had a huge argument with Saint Barnabas (Acts 15:36-39). Now one must ask, did GOD for instance favor Paul over Barnabas and Peter and inspired him the words while he was fighting with them? If so, since Peter was "clearly in the wrong", then how about his Gospels? Wasn't every word that Peter spoke supposedly inspired by GOD? How then could he be "clearly in the wrong"? One of them must be in the wrong, which in either case, would also produce another contradiction to 2 Timothy 3:16. Is Paul GOD Himself? No Christian believes in that. So why then take everything he says including 2 Timothy 3:16 as the Words of GOD Almighty when they contain clear contradictions in them?

Please visit Many famous Historians and Theologians before came to conclusions that Paul was not truthful.

The original Bible was lost! See comments from the commentary of the NIV Bible (one of the most used Bibles world wide) itself admitting that most of the Books and Gospels of the Bible are corrupted. No one ever claimed ownership of the current Books and Gospels. The owners/writers are unknown.





7- Christians are hypocrites for following ONLY 1 Timothy 3:2 and 1 Timothy 3:12:

Since some Christians are so big on being politically correct to the majority of their corrupted people, who practice open *!*!*!*!ography, sodomy, homosexual marriage, open sexuality (through tight and too revealing cloths), etc..., and they LOVE to use nonsense such as 1 Timothy 3:2 and 1 Timothy 3:12 to prove that polygamy is prohibited in the Bible when on the contrary I proved beyond question, in the previous section, that they do allow polygamy to the general public, then I would like to ask them this:

If you're so big on following Paul's teachings, then why do you allow your women to preach in churches?!

Didn't Paul himself say: "Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church. (1 Corinthians 14:34)"

Why then do you have popular female church ministers such as Mrs. Joyce Meyer? What ever happened to Paul's command in 1 Corinthians 14:34?!





8- 1 Kings 11:1-4 does not condemn polygamy!A Christian emailed me telling me that it is true that King Solomon had 100s of wives and concubines in the Old Testament, but that led him astray according to 1 Kings 11:1-4, thus this makes polygamy sinful and condemned in the Bible. Well, let us look at the verses from the NIV Bible:

1 Kings 11

Solomon's Wives

1 King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaoh's daughter-Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites.
2 They were from nations about which the LORD had told the Israelites, "You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods." Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love.
3 He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray.
4 As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been.

As we clearly see in 1 Kings 11:2, the marriage of multiple wives by itself is not sinful and was never condemned. It was Solomon's marriage from the pagan women that was prohibited by GOD Almighty, because they were idol worshipers, and it resulted for him to be led astray and follow their pagan gods. I don't see any specific condemnation of polygamy in general in this verse what so ever! I mean the Bible's Old Testament (since 1 Kings 11:1-4 exist in the Old Testament) is crystal clear about allowing polygamy: "If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons....(From the NIV Bible, Deuteronomy 21:15)" How much more clearer can it get?


Christian sites agreeing with polygamy in the Bible:

Organization for Christian Polygamy
http://www.truthbearer.org/
Another Christian site that agrees with Polygamy (Be Free).
http://bfree.org/index.htm
Another Christian site that agrees with Polygamy.
http://www.christianpolygamy.com/
http://www.biblicalpolygamy.com/



Conclusion:

The Bible in both the Old Testament and the New Testament does allow polygamy. Jesus peace be upon him never prohibited polygamy. Jesus lived for 33 years of his life on earth among a nation who practiced polygamy. He never even once denounced it!

The Bible does allow men to marry an infinite amount of women. Women in Christianity can be treated and considered as nothing but sex objects because the Bible doesn't have any rules or controls over men in this issue. Also, women in the Bible are forced to marry men in special cases such as forcing childless widows to marry their brothers in law. It doesn't matter whether the widow wants to marry her brother in law or not, she will still have to do it anyway without any choice!.

Another case where women in the Bible are forced to marry men is when a man rapes a single woman, then she must marry him and she can't get a divorce from him (no matter how bad he is) for the rest of her life according to Deuteronomy 22:28-30. Only death can separate her from him!

See how the Bible punishes to death the men who rape married women, but forces the single raped women to marry their rapists

http://www.answering-christianity.com/que10.htm

source
http://www.answering-christianity.com

]

POLYGAMY in Islam

Polygamy was practised in its worst form before the emergence of Islam. It imposed no limit on number of wives a man could have. Many men had over one hundred wives. There was no law to restrict the number. These women had no rights to food, love, clothes, protection and inheritance. At a time like this when such practices were deep rooted in the customs of the nations, the MessangerB.A.P.U.H of Allah brought gradual and smooth order into this practice. HeB.A.P.U.H bore great hardship and personal sacrifice upon himself by supporting multiple needy and impoverished women.

Those who assess and judge this practice in the light of present day luxurious life style where excess of wealth, drinking and adulterous behaviour is common, forget that social advancement, sexual freedom and such rights of the women are the major factors which are forcing them into prostitution hardship and frustration. The poor or modern slaves and their spouses are more vulnerable to the great evil of adultery. Every day we hear accusations of sexual harassment by head of state, ministers and members of clergy, co-workers in factories and the public against women.

We all know why such things happen. It is the dual life style and character of these people, which makes them indulge in such behaviour. They have invented their own standards of morality, freedom and values of life. The Muslims with permission from the Lord marry more women and take full responsibility of children and maintenance. On the other hand his counterpart Western men in their free for all premarital and post marital affairs are as a rule polygamous and take no responsibility.

The Holy ProphetB.A.P.U.H took eleven women into matrimonial bondage at different times in different places under different circumstances. A brief account of his marriages and its background is presented here. Some of these details will be a repetition but it could not be avoided.

One must realise that it is during young age when the body is physically at its best. The desire for opposite sex is also maximum. It is proven in science that anxiety or over work reduces this urge. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H did not have the urge for another woman while married to KhadijahR.A for 25 years. Multiple marriages contracted during the period when he was old and under immense pressure with stress of wars, siege of Medina and religious duties could not be to fulfil his worldly desire? He is known to have kept himself awake in prayers night after night until Allah Subhan directed him (Surah Muzzamil) that he must take rest during the night. How could he have time to spare for human desire?

1.
O thou folded

In garments

2.
Stand (to prayers) by night,

But not all night,

3.
Half of it,

Or a little less,

4.
Or a little more;

And recite the Qur-an

In slow, measured rhythmic tones.

(Surah Muzzammil V-1-4)

His first wife KhadijahR.A was born in 556 AD i.e. 15 years before the year of the elephant and the birth of our ProphetB.A.P.U.H. Her father Khawalid bin Asad belonged to the famous tribe of Banu-Asad. Her first husband was Abu Hala bin Nias-Bin Zarara Tamimi. She had two sons from this husband named Hind and Hala.

Her second husband was Attiq bin Ayed Mukhzoomi. She had one daughter from this husband. Her both husbands died.

Once she dreamt that the sun had descended into her house and there was no house left unlit in the city Makkah. When KhadijahR.A told this dream to her cousin Warqa bin Noafal, he explained the dream as prediction to the sacred marriage of KhadijahR.A with MuhammadB.A.P.U.H. He was 25 years old at that time while KhadijahR.A was a widow and 40 years old.

Six children were born from this wedlock, two sons and four daughters i.e. Qasim, ZainabR.A, RuqqayahR.A, KalsoomR.A and FatimaR.A were born before the Prophethood while another son Abdullah was born after the Prophethood. He died at the age of two. MuhammadB.A.P.U.H was 40 years old when Gabrael told him in the cave of Hira that he was the messenger of God.

KhadijahR.A used to bring meals to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H herself inspite of the fact that she had many servants. Once Gabrael told the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, that Allah has granted a beautiful house of pearls to KhadijahR.A in heavens.

KhadijahR.A died at the age of 65 after having been happily married to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for 25 long years. The date she died was 10th of Ramadan.

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H showed great compassion and consideration for the character and good nature of KhadijahR.A. The consideration of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H is altogether different from the consideration of any young and handsome worldly man. He remained devoted and loyal to his chosen wife and did not indulge in polygamy while KhadijahR.A was alive.

His second wife SoudhaR.A bint Zumha belonged to the Quraysh family and the tribe of Amer bin Loue. She was married to Sukran bin Umro and had the unique honour of being the first lady of this tribe who embraced Islam. She had a son named Abdul Rehman from this husband. Once SaudhaR.A dreamt that the ProphetB.A.P.U.H of Allah came to her house and put his foot over her neck.

Her husband died when she was 50 years old. Khaulah bint Hakeem who used to look after the Prophet’sB.A.P.U.H household asked for the marriage of SaudhaR.A to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. It was the month of Shawal in the 10th year of the Prophethood when she got married. She joined the ProphetB.A.P.U.H seven months after he had reached Medina. SaudhaR.A treated all fellow wives with love affection and without jealousy.

SaudhaR.A knew the craft of making leather goods. She was quite well off on account of leather goods trade. She was a great Philanthropist person. She would distribute to the poor whatever she earned.

She died in the 14th Hijra year at the ripe age of 72 years. She is buried in the Baqee graveyard.

Her marriage to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H was primarily for looking after the day to day responsibilities of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H where four small children had to be cared and looked after by some body. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H married a fifty-year-old woman when he could have married a younger woman. He was very busy and working hard for the spread of the new religion. The Prophet’sB. A.P.U.H considerations for marriage are different from ordinary man. His wife was so old that she voluntarily gave her matrimonial rights to the fellow wives. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H never divorced her.

Women could freely meet and discuss personal and worldly matters without any veil or reservation at that time like other women the ladies of the Prophet’sB. A.P.U.H house also went out freely for business, visiting their relatives and to attend the matters relating to natural call. Until such time (Surah Ahzab) Verses 32-33 were revealed.

32.
O Consorts of the Prophet!

Ye are not like any

Of the (other) women:

If ye do fear (God),

Be not too complaisant

Of speech, lest one

In whose heart is

A disease should be moved

With desire: but speak ye

A speech (that is) just.

33.
And stay quietly in

Your houses, and make not

A dazzling display, like

That of the former Times

Of ignorance; and establish

Regular Prayer, and give

Regular Charity; and obey

God and His Apostle.

And God only wishes

To remove all abomination

From you, ye Members

Of the Family, and to make

You pure and spotless.

(Surah Ahzab, V-32-33)

His third wife AyeshaR.A bint Abu Bakr belonged to the tribe Tayem bin Mairah-Bin Kaab. Her father was a cloth Merchant.

When the Messenger of Allah was born on first Rabi-ul-Awal. The year was named the year of the Elephant. This year was also named as First Muhammedee year. On the first Rabi-ul-Awal of the second Muhammadee year the ProphetB.A.P.U.H became one year old. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H got married to KhadijahR.A on 26th Muhammadee year i.e. the age of 25 years. He migrated to Medina in 54th Muhammadee year i.e. at 53 years of age and died in 64th Muhammadee year i.e. at 63 years of age.

AyeshaR.A was born in the 26th Muhammadee year. She was five years old when MuhammadB.A.P.U.H became ProphetB.A.P.U.H in 41 Muhammadee year i.e. at the age of 40. She married the Messenger of Allah in 51 Muhammadee year i.e. at the age 15 and she migrated to Medina in 54 Muhammadee year when she was 18 years. She moved into the Prophet’sB. A.P.U.H house at the age of 19 years. When the ProphetB.A.P.U.H died in 64 Muhammadee year or 10th Hijra. AyeshaR.A had completed 28 years of age.

Ayesha’sR. A age is further confirmed by the Ahadees or practised traditions of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. All aspects of ProphetB.A.P.U.H life style become traditions and are followed by his followers. Not a single example is available in Islamic history amongst the four caliphs and many centuries after them where a true follower of Islam married a 6-year or 9 year old. This is the reason why the age used in this book is 19 years. AyeshaR.A remained married to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for 8 years.

The house where AyeshaR.A moved with her husband consisted of one room that was 15 feet wide and 12 feet long. Its walls were made from earthen bricks and its roof was built with branches of date trees and their leaves. Blankets were placed over the roof to prevent rain, water from entering the house. There was a room on the second story adjacent to this house.

The furniture in the house consisted of a bed, a mat of palm leaves, one leather pillow, filled with skin of the date leaves, two pots to store flour and dates one pot for storage of water and a glass for drinking water.

Ayesha’sR.A position amongst other wives is unique as the angel Gabrael showed the ProphetB.A.P.U.H her picture and gave Allah’s massage to marry her. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H received Gabrael in her house with Surah’s of Quran. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H died in this house and he is also buried there.

After the death of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H Ayesha’sR.A father Abu BakrR.A became the Caliph. His Caliphhood remained for two years three months and ten days.

After the death of Abu BakrR.A, UmarR.A became the Caliph, he was stabbed and died. Both close friends of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H are buried in Aysha’sR.A house. After Umar UsmanR.A became the Caliph he was also martyred and AliR.A became the Caliph. After AliR.A HassanR.A became the Caliph.

It was Caliph Ameer Moaivia bin Abi Sufyan who followed HassanR.A and brought all factions of Muslims together. His caliphood started in 41st Hijrah in the month of Rabi-ul-Awal.

In 57th Hijra year AyeshaR.A fell seriously ill and on 17th of Ramadan died at the age of 73. She is buried in Baqee’s graveyard.

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H had no say in this marriage since Gabrael had showed him her picture and told him that she is your bride. AyeshaR.A was such a special person that Allah Subhan interfered to settle the intrigue created by some intrigures by revealing her innocence.

11.
Those who brought forward the lie are a body

Among yourselves; think it not

To be an evil to you

On the contrary it is good

For you: to every man

Among them (will come The punishment) of the sin

That he earned, and to him

Who took on himself the lead

Among them, will be

A Penalty grievous.

(Surah Al-Nur; V-11)


Similarly in the verse 12 of the same Surah is given:

12.
Why did not the Believers---

Men and Women---When ye

Heard of the affair,---put

The best construction on it

In their own minds

And say, "This (charge)

Is an obvious lie"?

(Surah Al-Nur; V-12)


And in the verse 13 is said:

13.
Why did they not bring

Four witnesses to prove it?

When they have not brought

The witnesses, such men,

In the sight of God,

(Stand forth) themselves as liars!

(Surah Al-Nur; V-13)

All actions of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H are with Allah’s consent and there is no way out for him His love, care and regard for AyeshaR.A can be explained for his obedience and complete submission to Allah’s will.

His fourth wife HafsahR.A bint Umar belonged to the tribe of Bani Adi, and was previously married to Khanais-bin-Hazafa, who died in the battle of Badr. HafsahR.A was now a widow and only 21 years at this time.

She married the ProphetB.A.P.U.H of Allah in the month of Shahban in the third Hijrah year. She was well-educated person. She used to record the Surah of the Holy Quran on paper and keep in safety. She kept these pages with her throughout her life. When the ProphetB.A.P.U.H died she was 24 years old she spent seven and a half years as Prophet’sB. A.P.U.H companion. Writing and compilation of the Holy Quran was done with Hafsah’sR.A help. She died at the age of 63 in 45th Hijrah year at the time of Caliph Ameer Maavia.

She could read and write. Temperamentally she was hot tempered due to which people were reluctant to marry her. She lost her husband in very young age. Her father a close friend of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H was worried about her wellbeing. This marriage helped Islam as it was Hafsah’sR.A efforts to write and save Quranic Surah which later helped Caliph UsmanR.A to compile the first complete manuscript of written Quran. She remained with the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for 7 years and six months only.

His fifth wife ZainabR.A bin Khizeemah was previously married to Ubaid bin Al-Haris who died in the battle of Badr. She married again to Abdullah bin Hajush. He was also killed in the war. She was a widow again. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H married her when she was fifty. She lived only for eight months and died in the month of Rabi-ul-Akher in the 4th Hijra year.

This marriage to a widow who was living in hardship having lost two previous husbands in the war was on compassionate grounds only.

His sixth wife Ume-SalmaR.A bint Abi Umayyah was previously married to Abu Salma who died because of a wound sustained in the battle of Uhud on the third Jamadi-ul-Sani in fourth Hijra. She had four small children from this husband and no one to support. She was only 30 years old at this time. She married the ProphetB.A.P.U.H in the month of Shawal in the fourth Hijrah. After marriage she moved into the house vacated by ZainabR.A, who had died six months ago. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H looked after four children too. She died in 59th Hijrah year at the age of 80 years.

This marriage too was motivated by compassion where a young widow with four small children and no one to look after got a home and sustenance for her and her children.

His seventh wife ZainabR.A bint Hajush was first cousin of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H and quite beautiful. If the ProphetB.A.P.U.H had wished to marry her, he could have done so without any difficulty. He requested her to consent for marriage to his adopted son and freed slave Zayd with whom she got married but could not get along well. This marriage ended in divorce. Her marriage to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H was motivated by submitting to Allah’s will where in (Surah Ahzab) tradition to refuse marriage with adopted son’s divorcee was rejected and to defy law of inheritance prevailing for adopted son.

4.
God has not made

For any man two hearts

In his (one) body: nor has

He made your wives whom

Ye divorce by Zihar

Your mothers: nor has He

Made your adopted sons

Your sons. Such is (only)

Your (manner of) speech

By your mouths. But God

Tells (you) the Truth, and He

Shows the (right) Way

5.
Call them by (the names Of) their fathers: that is

Juster in the sight of God.

But if ye know not

Their father’s (names, call

Them) your Brothers in faith,

Or your Maulas.

But there is not blame

On you if ye make

A mistake therein:

(What counts is)

The intention of your hearts:

And God is Oft-Returning,

Most Merciful

(Surah Ahzab, V-4-5)

His eighth wife JavairiaR.A bint Haris was the daughter of Haris of Umro-bin-Amer who belonged to Yemen where Queen Sabha ruled those days. Her father was settled in Hajjaz. Haris was the leader of his tribe.

Her name given by her father was Burah. When she grew older, she married a man named Musahfah. Her father Haris bin Abi Zarar and her husband Musahfah were deadly against the Muslims and the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. Her husband was killed in the Battle of Bani Mutlik but her father fled away from the scene. In this battle six hundred prisoners were taken amongst whom was Burah the daughter of the Chief of the tribe. She was given to Salit bin Qais Ansari as maid. She protested in front of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, and said, "She is daughter of a chief of the tribe, and not used to being a slave and maid servant".

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H paid money for her freedom and set her free, she was so moved by this noble gesture of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H that she refused to go to her father but to stay in service of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H asked her hand in marriage and sent a massage to her father who happily agreed. When she married the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, she was 20 years old. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H changed her name from Burah to JavariaR.A. The father of Burah was so moved by these acts of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H that he also embraced Islam. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H set free forty more slaves of this tribe. When other Muslims came to know of this gesture, they all set free their slaves and thus this great tribe embraced Islam and became a great source of strength for the Muslims.

When the ProphetB.A.P.U.H died JavairiaR.A was 21 years old. She lived with the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for one year only. She died at the age of 71 years in the 56th Hijrah year. She is buried in the Baqee graveyard.

Javairia’sR.A family and her tribesmen were strong and deadly opponent of the Islam and the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. Her marriage to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H helped conversion of whole of this strong tribe. These new converts became a source of great strength for future spread of Islam in the region.

His ninth wife Ume-HabibahR.A bint Abu Sufyan was named Rumla. She was married to Ubaid Ullah. When atrocities of Quraysh of Makkah against Muslims increased, Rumla and Ubaid Ullah migrated to Hubsha, where Najashi was the king. Ubaid Ullah impressed by the wealthy way of life of Christians in the Kingdom, revoked his faith and became a Christian. Rumla divorced him and started to live there as a widow.

The king of Hubsha embraced Islam in the sixth Hijrah year on the invitation of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. When the ProphetB.A.P.U.H learnt that Ume HabibahR.A was living in Hubsha in great hardship, he sent a proposal to the king Najashi to ask her hand in marriage. She happily agreed to this proposal. She had a daughter named Habibah from her previous husband. Ume HabibahR.A was 36 years old when she married with the ProphetB.A.P.U.H.

Her father was Abu Sufyan, the chief of Quraysh of Makkah. He once came to meet with the ProphetB.A.P.U.H in Medina. He had met her daughter after 14 years. She refused him the privilege to sit on the bed of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, as he was non-Muslim and unclean.

He was very upset on this behaviour of her daughter. He later embraced Islam, and took part in the battle of Yarmouk in Caliph Usman’s time. He lost his second eye in this battle. His first eye was lost in the Battle of Ta’if. He died in the third Hijrah year at the age of 96 years. He is buried in the Baqee graveyard.

Ume HabibahR.A died at 74 years of age in the 44th Hijrah. She is buried in the house of Caliph Ali’R.As house in Medina.

Abu Sufyan was chief of the Quraysh of Makkah. He was also a great opponent of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H and Islam. His daughter, who had migrated to Hubsha along with other Muslims, was divorced and living there in hardship. Her marriage to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H relieved her hardship and brought her father and his relatives under the umbrella of Islam. This marriage was motivated by political reasons and for the cause of Islam.

His tenth wife SafiaR.A bint Haye was the daughter of Haye bint Akhtab who was a great scholar of Taura and chief of Banu Naseer. He broke the pact reached between the ProphetB.A.P.U.H and the Jews of the neighbouring tribes of Medina. When expelled from Medina, he was accepted as chief of the Jews of Khyber. He was from amongst the direct descendants of Prophet Haroon the real brother of the Prophet Moses.

SafiaR.A was married to Salam bint Mushkum who belonged to the Tribe of Banu Qareenta. He was a great swordsman and a poet. There was great disparity amongst the views of SafiaR.A and her husband. They were divorced soon after their marriage. Soon she married again to Kunana bin Rabeeh bin Abi-Alhaqeeq.

Haye-Ibn-i-Akhtab broke his pledge for the third time and joined Quraysh of Makkah and other tribes to attack Medina in the Battle of Moat. This was a sever violation of the pledge where Jews had agreed not to fight against Muslims. When the siege of Medina was broken and the Jews were forced to retreat, the ProphetB.A.P.U.H was informed about the continuos intrigue of Banu Qareenta. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H perused and surrounded their tribe to stop them from further intrigue. He rounded up their men and killed them in the battle. Their women and children were taken captives.

After the death of Haye-Ibn-i-Akhtab, Kanana bin Rabee, the second husband of SafiaR.A became the chief of Jews of Khyber and continued his intrigues against the Muslims. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H attacked them in their fortresses in Khyber to put an end to their intrigues forever.

The Jews of Khyber surrendered and accepted their defeat. The land confiscated from Jews of Banu Naseer and other Jews of Medina was returned to the Jews of Khyber on the condition that they would cultivate and give half of its yield to the Muslims. After the Battle of Khyber ended, SafiaR.A whose husband had been killed in the battle was taken captive.

She was brought before the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. As she was the daughter of the chief of Banu Naseer and Banu Kareenta, the ProphetB.A.P.U.H paid money for her freedom and set her free.

She accepted Islam instead of returning to her people. She decided to stay with the ProphetB.A.P.U.H who married her in the month of Jamadi-ul-Awal in the seventh Hijra year.

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H stayed in Khyber for few days where Jews invited him on a feast. A Jewish woman added poison in the cooked meat and offered to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. When SafiaR.A married the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, she was 17 years old. She remained married to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for four years. She died at the age of 60 and is buried in the Baqee graveyard.



She was Jewish by religion and daughter of a Jew scholar well respected in the Jewish community of Arabia. Her marriage to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H put an end to the intrigues of Jews and the relations between Muslims and Jews improved considerably. She remained married to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for four years only.



His eleventh wife MaimoonaR.A bint Haris was daughter of the Haris Ameria Hilalia of the tribe of Qais-bin Eilan. Her given name was Burah. She was previously married to Masood bin Umer bin Ameer, which soon ended in divorce. Burah married again to Abu Duham bin Abdul Azee who also died soon. She had no children from these marriages.

She married the ProphetB.A.P.U.H while he was in Makkah performing Umra. The ProphetB.A.P.U.H changed her name from Burah to MaimoonaR.A. He was 59 years old at that time. She was the last woman whom he married. After this marriage all members of the tribe of Halab bin Amer became close and faithful allies of the Muslims.

On 29th of the month of Sufar Almuzapher in the 11th Hijra year the ProphetB.A.P.U.H got swear headache when he returned from a funeral. He was with Maimoona in her house during this illness but later moved to the house of AyeshaR.A.

She remained married to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H for three years and three months only. She was 39 years old when the ProphetB.A.P.U.H died. MaimoonaR.A died in the 51st Hijrah year at the age of 81 years. She is buried near Makkah where she met the ProphetB.A.P.U.H after marriage.

The timing of this marriage had great political benefit for Islam. MaimoonaR.A was closely related to Prophet’sB. A.P.U.H uncle Abbas, Khalid bin Walid and many important elders and leaders of Quraysh who were instrumental in sever opposition to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H and his religion. This marriage helped in rekindling the old Quraysh bondage’s and reconcile differences.



Islam and Polygamy

There is almost consensus of opinion that Islam allows polygamy. However it is permission and not the order or commandment of the Quran that a Muslim male should indulge in polygamy. Islam in fact did not introduce polygamy. Polygamy had been recognised and established institution in almost all-human societies since times immemorial. Polygamy has existed among the Hindus, Assyrians, Babylonians, Persians, Athenians, Hebrews, Romans and even in Christians. At the advent of Islam, it was existing among the pagan Arabs in its worst form. Though Islam also maintained the polygamy, but it introduced many steps to reform this institution. Number of wives was restricted at four and the permission tied up with the condition of justice and equal treatment with all wives.

In recent times, Islam’s permission of polygamy has been subjected to much hostile criticism not only by its traditional non-Muslim opponents but also by some Western-educated Muslim thinkers who view this permission as an encroachment upon the rights of women. However, this notion is altogether misconceived, because polygamy in itself is not an evil for in some cases it becomes a real cultural, social and moral necessity.

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H in his lifetime took eleven women in marriage. Majority of these marriages as described above were contracted due to cultural, social, political and moral necessity. In war when a large number of men are killed, the women outnumber men and in this situation, polygamy becomes a social and economic necessity. In case of chronically ill and infertile wife, polygamy prevents break up of marriage as the husband can contract another wife to have children. Polygamous instinct of men as compared to women is also recognised in science. Restriction of number of marriages to one for some men would most certainly encourage society to embark on adultery and prostitution. The modern world where such restrictions have been legally imposed is full of evidence to such evils.

It is universally recognised that laws, orders and limitations imposed on ordinary people are not enforced on special people chosen from among the people by themselves or by the Almighty Allah. Let us first take the rights of the leaders chosen by people such as kings, presidents, prime ministers, chief justices and general managers. They all enjoy special privileges, usually defined by the constitution or parliament of the country. When we do not object to these privileges given to ordinary men, how can we question the privileges given to the prophets?

There are many examples in history where ordinary laws were not applicable to the Prophets. Prophet Christ was born without a father with special divine act similarly Prophet Moses killed a non-follower without declaring war. He could not be punished by the law of the land, as it was not applicable on him.

Allah subhan has the final authority in changing not only the man made law as in the case of Prophet Moses but also the laws of nature, made by himself for all other human beings as in the case of birth of the prophet Christ.

All wives of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H helped to compile the most authentic traditions of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H, which were to be used for the generations of Muslim, men and women all over the world after his demise. His list of marriages included widows, freed and captive slaves, divorcees and Jewish women. What ProphetB.A.P.U.H does in his life becomes automatically a tradition to be followed by his fellows. Lot of those marriages he contracted were to set an example and a tradition for his followers for all times and circumstances. As regards numbers the prophets in the past had many wives therefore may be that Allah did not wish his ProphetB.A.P.U.H to limit this number and thus have some bearing on the other prophets. Situations are also subject to change in times of war, famine and peace and any tradition set by the ProphetB.A.P.U.H could have created problems for the future followers especially when MuhammadB.A.P.U.H was the last prophet to come.

The ProphetB.A.P.U.H did not have any shortage of young and beautiful wives if he had so wished for. The most important task for the ProphetB.A.P.U.H is to live and die for the cause for which he is chosen. His tolerance, resilience and patience in any of his personal actions are neither comparable nor matchable to any other mortal. He suffers extreme personal hardship for his cause. He starves, he bleeds, he migrates, he fights, he prays, he forgives and he marries for the pleasure and will of his Creator. He is chosen as his messenger to spread his laws and messages. His personal demands, wishes and pleasures have no say in front of the will of his Creator. To judge his actions the whole background of his mission has to be kept in mind.

The Holy Quran is quite clear on the number. Islam has restricted man’s right of contracting plural marriages to a maximum of four at a time, while the rights of wives in case of multiple marriages of the husband have been protected. The relevant injunctions of the Qur’an are:

3.
If ye fear that ye shall not

Be able to deal justly

With the orphans,

Marry women of your choice,

Two, or tree, or four;

But if ye fear that ye shall not

Be able to deal justly (with them),

Then only one, or (a captive)

That your right hands possess,

That will be more suitable,

To prevent you

From doing injustice.

(Surah Al-Nisaa, V-3)

129.
Ye are never able
To be fair and just

As between women,

Even if it is

Your ardent desire:

But turn not away

(From a woman) altogether,

So as to leave her (as it were)

Hanging (in the air).

If ye come to a friendly

Understanding, and practise

Self-restraint, God is

Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.

(Surah Al-Nisaa, V-3,129)

Thus verse No. 3 of Surah Al-Nisaa gives permission of polygamy to man, but it restricts the maximum number of wives at four. The permission is also subject to the proviso that the husband must do justice with all the wives. ‘Adl’ or justice used in this verse has not been defined. However all the commentators of the Qur’an unanimously hold that justice in this verse means equal treatment in food, clothing and lodgement. But some consider that in addition to food, clothing and lodging there must be equal treatment in time allotted for love and affection also.

The Quran in its verse No. 129 of Surah Al-Nisaa, which has been reproduced above, holds that you cannot deal equally with all of your wives however much you wish. From this verdict of the Quran (which is in fact a true statement of the human nature) and the linking of permission with the condition of justice, some scholars believe that monogamy is the rule in Islam while polygamy is the exception.

Injunctions of the Quran regarding abolition of prostitution and other instruction pertaining to relations with the bondwomen have led some writers to believe that sexual relations outside the ambit of marriage are absolutely ruled out by Islam. According to them, cohabitation with bondwomen and slave-girls without marriage is unlawful.

Muhammad Asad, who is one of such thinkers, while commenting on verse 3 of Surah Al-Nisaa in his book, "The Message of the Quran" writes that condition of having maximum four wives is applicable in the case of free women as well as slave-girls. According to him, "Contrary to the popular view and the practice of many Muslims in the past centuries, neither the Quran nor the life-example of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H provides any sanction for sexual intercourse without marriage". Sexual relations with female slaves are permitted only because of marriage, and that in this respect there is no difference between them and free women.

All reverred ladies (wives) of the sacred house were looked after with great reverence and respect by the caliphs after demise of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H. They were given allowance of twelve thousand dirhams every year which most ladies distributed amonst the needy and poor. They kept hardly any thing for themselves. How the wives of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H are different from other ladies is also clear from the divine intervention in the case of SaudahR.A who was tall and heavy in build and therefore could be easily recognised. One day Caliph UmarR.A spoted her in the street and recognised her. She did not like this and reported the matter to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H who kept quite. Allah Subhan interfered and Surah Ahzab (Verses 32 & 33) were revealed to the ProphetB.A.P.U.H and the wives of the ProphetB.A.P.U.H were advised to stay quietly in their houses.

Polygamy in Christianity and Islam

It is a very interesting one, because any mention of polygamy to those who are not Muslim usually evokes an immediate response of shock and even disgust. It is seen as the ultimate example of woman's degradation in a religion totally dominated by men.

It is so important, then, for us to address the issue. Non-Muslims have no understanding about the purpose of taking more than one wife and they have very little understanding of the place polygamy has in Islam, or of the reasons for it being tolerated.

Muslims, too, when confronted aggressively about polygamy by non-Muslims and asked why Islam allows a man to take more than one wife, often remain silent, wondering what to say or how to explain it. Their slow response suggests dissatisfaction with polygamy itself and hints that it cannot really be justified in our modern age by educated men and women. We have a great responsibility to present the truth.

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The famous Christian Evangelist and preacher Dr. Billy Graham has this to say about Islam and polygamy:

"Christianity cannot compromise on the question of polygamy. If present day Christianity cannot do so, it is to its own detriment. Islam has permitted polygamy as a solution to social ills and has allowed a certain degree of latitude to human nature but only within the strictly defined framework of the law.

Christian countries make a great show of monogamy, but actually they practice polygamy. No one is unaware of the part mistresses play in Western society. In this respect Islam is a fundamentally honest religion, and permits a Muslim to marry a second wife if he must, but strictly forbids all clandestine amatory associations in order to safeguard the moral probity of the community." (Quoted in Women In Islam by Dr. Sherif Abdel Azeem)

He quite clearly recognizes that Islam has an important role in society.

We must be very clear, though, about what we are told in the noble Qur'an:

*{If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with them, then only one}* (An-Nisaa' 4:3)

Islam was quite revolutionary in limiting the number of wives a man could take to four. It was quite normal throughout the Arabian Peninsula for a man to have many wives, but Allah limited this to two, three, or four. The conditions are also very clear. A man must be able to deal justly with each of the wives, treating them equally. If he is not able to do this, and this is a very difficult requirement, some might even say impossible, he should marry just one wife.

Polygamy was permitted because of a pressing social need in the early Muslim community. Many widows were uncared for because their husbands had been killed in battle. Taking more than one wife was seen as a way of caring for these women.

We should also remember that polygamy is permitted in Islam. It is tolerated. In other words, it is allowed in certain pressing circumstances, but is by no means the norm and should not even be considered as particularly desirable.

Islam is an eminently sensible religion and has provided ways for people to live together in harmony. There is, however, one thing that is perfectly clear. Satisfying a man's sexual appetites has nothing to do with polygamy in Islam. This is not why it is allowed. Any suggestion to the contrary is wrong. If as Muslims we were able to convince the world of this, we might just be able to let people see Islam for what it really is, and not for the caricature by which it is often portrayed.

When talking about polygamy in Islam to others, we must not forget to mention to them that polygamy existed in the Old Testament. We are told in the First Book of Kings that King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3) and in the Second Book of Samuel that King David had many wives and concubines (2 Samuel 5:13). In the Book of Deuteronomy, we are told how to divide a man's property among the sons of different wives (Deuteronomy 22:7).

In the New Testament, used by Christians, Jesus does not at any stage explicitly forbid polygamy or recommend that a man take only one wife. This is surely a very interesting omission since the Jews of Jesus' time were still taking more than one wife. If polygamy were contrary to his teaching, he would surely have said something on the subject.

Saint Paul, the real founder of the Christian religion, again does not speak out against polygamy. In fact, Paul is so concerned that the world is about to end, that he actually recommends not marrying for those who are not yet married, since there would not be time enough left for a couple to enjoy marriage!

It is Saint Augustine of Hippo who advises Christians to abide with the existing Roman ruling of taking only one wife, although the Romans and the Greeks did take mistresses quite openly in their societies.

In such a brief answer to your question, we can only say that polygamy did certainly exist in the Old Testament and that Jesus did not condemn it in the New. Those who would point accusing fingers at Islam should recognize this.

They should also admit that Islam was revolutionary, as we have said, in limiting the number of wives a man could take, and this only if he could treat them equally. The whole reason for taking more than one wife was to take care of those women who had no one to care for them. In such a society as that of the early Muslims in the Arabian Peninsula, this was a pressing need.

In our own age, when women outnumber men in some countries, we might need, as a society, to look once more at the example and the solution which Islam provided fourteen centuries ago.

Muslims have no reason to be silent when polygamy is mentioned. If some people have brought polygamy into disrepute by the way they treat women, we should also remember that Islam has nothing to be ashamed of.

Islam is perfect, even though Muslims are not. Polygamy is tolerated by Islam as a way of resolving life's difficulties. Therefore, polygamy is there but it does not have to be practiced. We can let the rest of the world know this

[Zamtsa]

Why Polygyny Are Allowed To Be Done By Men?


Muslim must not be an arrogant person. Every Ulama begin from becoming a no one, with their sacrifice on time and not spoiling their physics and mind. They always learning.

Based on 1 of member who asked, why men are allowed to do Polygyny?
Where is the Dalil that Polygyny is a blessing?
Why show Muslim the Marriage way in Bible?
The answer for the 1st question: An Nisa(4):3 If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with (marry) the orphans marry women of your choice two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one or (a captive) that your right hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice.
That means that marrying an orphan could substitute from doing the Polygyny to non Yatim women. As many women are not Yatim(Orphans). This is the reason.
Polyandry is 1 of the insult to Rasulullah, where no point of doing Polyandry, where women could easily get infected by diseases from men, because of doing it, then it spread to the husbands as well.

The answer for the 2nd question: Look at the verse we all know which are An Nisa 3 and 129:
An Nisa(4):3 Wa in khiftum alla tuqsitu_ fil yata_ma_ fankihu_ ma_ ta_ba lakum minan nisa_'i masna_ wa sula_sa wa ruba_'(a), fa in khiftum alla_ ta'dilu_ fawa_hidatan au ma_ malakat aima_nukum, za_lika adna_ alla_ ta'a_lu_.
An Nisa(4):3 If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans marry women of your choice two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one or (a captive) that your right hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice.
The above verse saying that we (men) should marry orphans, but if we think that we couldn't be fair, as they would need extra care, as they usually do not have a house, and enough education, then we (men not women) should see there Allahu Ta'ala ordering by the word "Fankihu(Marry)," that's Fi'il Amr (order), many Imam already said that Fi'il Amr means Wajib, or that it is at leats a required action, that "Amar Ma'ruf," which is good and bring blessings to who does that.
Allahu kalam:
An Nisa(4):129 Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women even if it is your ardent desire: but turn not away (from a woman) altogether so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding and practice self-restraint Allah is Oft-Forgiving Most Merciful.
The above verse from Allahu 'Azza wa Jalla showing that sometime the husband will not be fair even it is his ardent desire.

Come back to the 1st question, Polyandry does not suit women, as Allahu Ta'ala made them to only love 1 man, except for the Zina doer, Polyandry is Zina, that is the same with Polygyny with more than 4, and Polygyny which done usually without fairness.
So why are women do not hurt, when seeing many widows who could not have any husband to marry them, and offcourse women are hurt by thinking Polygyny, because behind, Polygyny shows its trueness and justice.
So I hope that someone will hold their tongues to Syari'at although the person might not like it. Because many women need Polygyny. If they do not like Polygyny, they could hold their tongue from this Blessing from Allahu Ta'ala and marry modest husbands, and leave the rich, good and Shalih men to do Polygyny. InsyaAllah.

As for the 3rd question, I'ms showing that the Bible showed that women could choose between 3 condition:

1. Not marry
2. Marry but never ask for divorce, although if divorce happen as the result of the husband like another woman, that happen not because of her fault, she could never marry for the 2nd time, because she will bear the sin of a Zina doer.
3. Marry and when the husband wish for Polygyny, then she must not divorce him.
Then it means that the woman are in 3 conditions(according to the New Testament of the Christian Bible:

An Najm(53):32 Those who avoid enormities of sin and abominations, save the unwilled offences (for them) lo! thy Lord is of vast mercy. He is best aware of you (from the time) when He created you from the earth, and when ye were hidden in the bellies of your mothers. Therefor ascribe not purity unto yourselves. He is best aware of him who wardeth off (evil).
So it's like "What so big about love to husband or whatever, Allah's reward and meeting with Him are bigger than that, so what do I mind about Polygyny, I only mind if he does not have the capability and does not able to be fair and treat his wifes as equal. When he does so, I will remind him."
Alhamdulillah, Polygyny is essentially blessings from Allahu Tabaraka Ta’ala.
the female in Rasulullah's time know that Ali Radhiyallahu 'anhu only have 1 wife when Fathimah binti Muhammad Radhiyallahu 'anha still alive by his side, because he was in the intention of marrying the daughter of Musyrik Harbi who fight Muslim so hard at that time, that's why in a Hadits, Rasulullah said "Will never be together daughter of messenger with the daughter of enemy of Allah in one household."(Shahih).

Infact many widows in my town reporting to a Da'i(Ustadz) that no single men would marry them, so until now, they do not have any husband, save to have a good husband.

So a Muslimat would say "Ali..." while the fact was not that way. And say "Women are hurt, men only want Polygyny for themselves, they think with their...(not Polyandry, Polygyny: Polygamy where 1 man marries more than 1 wife. Polygamy: Polygyny and Polyandry).
While they also do not practice this Hadits "Does not being consider as having faith, someone who does not love his brother/sister in Islam as he/she loves him/herself."

If they have a good husband, they do not want to share him with another woman, save his wealth if he is a rich husband.
The decision come back to the hands of these women, if they said they are really loving to the women kind, and all these types.

Infact, many women are doing unlawful and unlimited Polyandry, so too with the men. And they chose "Monogamy," yes if you're saying that "Divorces people" as doing "Monogamy" after they are married again.


Assalamu'alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh.

[Zamtsa]

The Hikmah Of Polygyny Marriage


Many people are satisfied with doing Polygamy before marriage. They lost it to their girlfriends, not to their wifes. So many people are becoming "Divorce agents," but they resist Polygyny. So too with people who might be able to do Islamic Polygyny but their knowledge do not reach the perfectness of it. Polyandry will cause sickness, but not with Polygyny.
Polygamy did not come from Islam, Polygyny did.
Rasulullah said that in Polygyny are forbidden to marry two sisters at once and also forbidden to marry her auntie.
The wifes will be rewarded by Allahu Ta'ala for their patience, and the husband will be rewarded by Allahu Ta'ala for his justice.To become family.
1. Not the idea of choosing 1 after feeling the best of all women over 1 shot.
2. Not the idea of “not marrying with woman,” because of becoming a celebrity, but instead to “marry the fans,” so that you could make many women happy.
3. Makes man more mature in Din, and enhancing the ability to lead people.
4. After the husband feel the pleasure created from Polygyny, he will create better leadership in his life and this make his life better.
5. Man learn by leading the women where man will use his intellect and justice in his Polygyny marriage.
6. Polygyny marriage praises Allahu Ta’ala and Islam
7. In Islam there is this idea that man must marry minimum 2 wifes. That man is for 2 women to 4. And firstly that must be marry is an orphan:

QS.An Nisa (4):3. If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans marry women of your choice two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one or (a captive) that your right
hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice.
8. Verse in Al Qur’an about Polygyny:

An Nisa(4):129 Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women even if it is your ardent desire: but turn not away (from a woman) altogether so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding and practice self-restraint Allah is Oft-Forgiving Most Merciful.
9. When a man marry women he will find that in women, the characteristics that will lessen his arrogance as a man, because he needs them as in this verse:
QS.Ar Rum(30):21 And among His Signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves that ye may dwell in tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts); verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.
10. Because 1 man needs 2 women till 4 and becoming loyal to them, while women only need 1 man and becoming loyal to him.
11. The idea of splitting love doesn’t exist in Islam, because Islam does not allow twosome, threesome or foursome.
12. Islam really teach husband to do Jima’ only when his wife is pure, not when she is on Haid and Nifas. And allows the husband to do that by every ways, as long as it is still on the hole for child birth.
13. The solution for men who have a special liking to women. Rasulullah said “Women are married because of 4,… marry those because of her religion.”
Choose women as your wifes, those who have good Akhlaq and sound Aqidah.


Al Hadits already said that man who couldn't marry to fast. So it is not Fardhu 'ain to marry for people who does not have the ABILITY to marry.

This belongs to everything, not just to Polygyny. Eventhough people say again and again about Poygyny to satisfy ones ego and desire, then that does not invalidate the Polygyny genes inside men, only saying that they must marry 2 wifes if they are ABLE to, and MUST BE fair or they MUST NOT do Polygyny.

So they will think about their ability and after they are able to do Polygyny, they must think about being JUST and FAIR and if they believe that they have the ability and the akhlaq, then they must do Polygyny.

While it is also true that Polygyny is not famous amongs Muslim, until Mr.Abdul Karim Naik even said on one of his lectures that on some year, Polygyny of Hinduists were 5%, while by Muslim only 4%.
And now look that the Hinduists did not limit their POLYGYNY to 4 women.

Polygyny is Fardhu Muakkad for the above reasons and conditions, or even Fardhu 'ain, especially when this Sunnah is dead, no point will emerge from debating whether all the Prophets did it or not, because muslim only allowed for 4, not 100 as Sulaiman 'alaihi Salaam or 10 as Muhammad Shalallahu 'alaihi Sallam.

The idea of 1 woman for 1 man is out, as it is not what Allah wanted from Muslims, and the Predestination of Allahu Ta'ala is that Muslim will have at least 2 more wifes in Jannah (Heaven), so Polygyny will be the fate of every Muslim in the earth and in the Hereafter forever.

thanks for the nashihah, could you tell the difference between Fardhu Muakkad and Fardhu 'Ain or you have to ask Ulama like syaikh Salim bin Ied al Hilali, because shalat Idul Fitri is Fardhu muakkad according to him.

So many men are monogamous, but that doesn't make Polygyny as out of man's genes, just as now you see a sissy, is the masculinity out of his genes, come on.
Al Hadits already threatened for people who aren't FAIR in Polygyny, but incase you MISCONCEPT about fairness, Allahu Ta'ala spoke:


An Nisa(4):129 Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women even if it is your ardent desire: but turn not away (from a woman) altogether so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding and practice self-restraint Allah is Oft-Forgiving Most Merciful.
In Jannah there aren't any IBADAH anymore eventhough they are patient and try not be jealous of the husband's Polygyny with 70 wifes in Jannah, and in there, the Polygyny are eternal and for eternity, while the patience of the wifes on earth who are being in Polygyny, now that's the one gonna be rewarded by Allahu Ta'ala.

The Polygyny on earth has its limit, while on Jannah, that could be more than with 71 wifes.
Rasulullah said "A MARRIAGE feast which only invite RICH PEOPLE without poor people, it is a rebellion to Allah and His Rasul(Adabuz Zifaf by syaikh Nashir Al Albaani.
There are many Muslimat married with a Christian men now.
Do Polygyny to few Shalihatun, not with Kafir women.

Rasulullah said that near Al Qiyamah, 1 man will support 40 women, what do you think of that?

That is the result of war, keep that in mind.

Help other Muslimat by marriage is a modest thing. I tell ye what is inside women minds, they feel okay with you're marrying them 2 till 4, but if ye make girlfriends out of them or have a wife and a girlfirend, they will surely angry and will divorce thee. Keep that in your heart.

Ibn Mas’ud Radhiyallahu 'anhu said: If I only had ten days to live and I knew that I would die at the end of them, and I had any desire to get married, I would get married, for fear of fitnah (temptation).

He said this when he already had a wife.


It was narrated that Sa’id ibn Jubair said: Ibn ‘Abbaas Radhiyallahu 'anhu said to me: “Have you gotten married?”

I said: “No.”

He said: “Get married, for the best of this ummah are the ones with the most wives.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5069).


Polygyny obviously will make ye to put more attention on the benefits of marriage and put your attention on Muslimat who were married with Kafir men.

Not married because ye don't have any ability do not make ye sinners but forgetting about the Muslimat who married with Kafir men are Haraam. When choosing 1 Kafir women or a fasiq one instead of 2 till 4 Shalihatun;
What's the MOTIVATION for that?

[Zamtsa]

Polygyny In The Sight of Women

If they have a good husband, they do not want to share him with another woman, save his wealth if he is a rich husband.
The decision come back to the hands of these women, if they said they are really loving to the women kind, and all these types.

Infact, many women are doing unlawful and unlimited Polyandry, so too with the men. And they chose "Monogamy," yes if you're saying that "Divorces people" as doing "Monogamy" after they are married again.

Even I could assume as I could only assume, that in Christianity, the verses in the Bible said that husband and wife forbade to divorce, and although they are finally having a divorce, then after the divorce, the widow aren't allowed to marry again, because then the widow is taken as a Zina doer, if she marry for the 2nd time. Ye could find this verse in NT.

Then it means that the woman are in 3 conditions(according to the New Testament of the Christian Bible:

1. Not marry
2. Marry but never ask for divorce, although if divorce happen as the result of the husband like another woman, that happen not because of her fault, she could never marry for the 2nd time, because she will bear the sin of a Zina doer.
3. Marry and when the husband wish for Polygyny, then she must not divorce him.


Assalamu'alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

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[Follower]

GOD never intended for us to have multiple mates. But then we are all sinners!

Genesis 2
24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

[Follower]

Matthew 5
31"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' 32But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery

[Lynx]

Okay, I was not allowed to post my thread on polygamy since there are already threads on the topic. I guess this is the thread that I am supposed to contribute to instead. I wish the deleting bot or whatever would send a copy of the original thread to my inbox so I don't have to retype it !!. Gr.

Anyway,

So I read the OP and it's a great explanation on how, in some scenarios it would be okay to marry more than one wife. Most of these scenarios have to do with 1400 years ago unfortunately and it weakens the defense presented by the OP. Also I won't address anything it says about the bible and polygamy because most Christians agree that their texts are not 100% compatible with today's day and age. Besides, the reason I am taking it upon myself to pose this question is because of one of comments made by someone here on how it would be so good to have a moral code embedded in religion.

So basically my problem is not with polygamy itself but the brand of polygamy presented by Islam. Islam says it is okay to marry another wife without the permission of your first wife. I think this is reason to serious harm towards women who see their husbands marry more than once. No body likes having their spouse/lover sleeping with another person. The men here can easily testify to this; imagine your wife sleeping with another man while you lay in bed? It's an awful feeling. The defences, and some were mentioned in the OP are as follows:

-There is a social benefit in marrying some women who are widows or need someone to take care of them.

Response: As far as I understand the verse allowing polygamy was revealed after many muslim men had died in battle and there were many widows to be taken care of. I mean sure this is great but the Quran doesn't say this is the ONLY condition in which a man should marry more than one wife. The man is still capable of marrying a wife just for the heck of it. Moreover, his responsibility to his first wife is superior to his responsibility ot marry women for the sake of charity especially when he can just donate money or take care of a widow in that way.

-Man has to treat all wives fairly so this makes it okay.
response: A man might be able to treat his wives equally but there is more to proper treatment than just equal time in affection, money, food, and shelter. There is an inherent right that a woman and man have over each other after marriage similar to the idea of 'gheerah'.

-A woman can just specify in her marriage contract that husband is not allowed to get married again.

response: great, she can except some scholars look down on it (islam qa comes to mind) since she is forbidding that which Allah has allowed. Moreover, many women don't know or don't have much say in their marriage contract or they feel too embarrassed to add it in thinking it might look bad on the family or herself or it might like look she isn't trusting of the guy. And of course, there is A HUGE misconception amongst many Muslim women that think that a husband needs permission from his wife to get married so they don't even bother.


So yeh, this is my problem and I look forward to responses. My point about morality being derived from religious moral codes is that if you think God allows this sort of behavior then no one is going to change it. The danger of religious morality is that it is dogmatic and thus, if an absurd law like this one is revealed then no one can change it because it would be blasphemy or whatever. In this respect, secular laws based upon the social contract are better because they are flexible with society so everyone's happiness is maximized.

[aadil77]

Matthew 5
31"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' 32But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery

how does this have any relevance to polygamy?

[aadil77]

GOD never intended for us to have multiple mates. But then we are all sinners!

Genesis 2
24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

So you're calling the prophets sinners, you christians really are a unique but misguided bunch

and again that verse has nothing to do polygamy, he could be united and made one flesh with many other wives as well

[Ummu Sufyaan]

So I read the OP and it's a great explanation on how, in some scenarios it would be okay to marry more than one wife. Most of these scenarios have to do with 1400 years ago unfortunately and it weakens the defense presented by the OP.

No it doesn’t. Don’t men die in Iraq, Chechnya, Palestine, etc and leave their wives and children behind?

Man has to treat all wives fairly so this makes it okay.

Co-wives will be always jealous of one another. Women in general can get very jealous over one another it isn’t specific to a marital relationship. You have even sisters being jealous of their sisters in laws or sisters being jealous of the mothers in law (and visa versa)...you have *blood* sisters can get jealous.
What im getting at is that if the husband (or brother or son in the other examples mentioned) are willing to treat the women justly and fairly and has done everything he can do and that is upon him to treat his wives correctly, etc, then why is polygamy the issue here? Why is it getting picked on, if you will? And indeed though women will get jealous over one another, it makes a hell of a difference if the guy takes it upon himself to fulfil his duty towards them.

Looking at it from the perspective of your argument i.e: "Man has to treat all wives fairly so this makes it okay," the fact that he doesn’t care or isn’t fulfilling his duty towards his wives, isn’t polygamy’s fault, because Islam itself has set the guidelines that are incumbent to follow.

Gheerah, jealousy, etc is in the realm of those emotions/entities that people have no physical control over. Why is someone blamed for the emotions that they themselves can’t control? now you can use the argument that “if he wasn’t married to another woman, then she wouldn’t feel jealous.” But this argument is extremely weak and flawed for the reason that you don’t need to be married to someone to feel jealousy over them. Can not a wife feel jealousy if her husband looked at/commented on another woman (not married to her)? Can not a wife feel jealously over her husband if she saw looking at him, etc? Situations like this occur when one isn’t married either...so what difference does it make?

-A woman can just specify in her marriage contract that husband is not allowed to get married again.
response: great, she can except some scholars look down on it (islam qa comes to mind) since she is forbidding that which Allah has allowed.

1. Link for the fatwa? and 2. Daleel for “ [...]since she is forbidding that which Allah has allowed.” Because im gna take it that since it is permitted for a woman to staple in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife, then why would it be counted as forbidding what is permitted? It makes no sense.

Secondly, even if the scholar did rule that, how is that even relevant? She isn’t answering to the scholar at the end of the day, she is answering to Allah

Moreover, many women don't know or don't have much say in their marriage contract or they feel too embarrassed to add it in thinking it might look bad on the family or herself or it might like look she isn't trusting of the guy.

Whats that got to do with Islam though? If the sister is too embarrassed to speak up, or think that she’ll look bad to her family, how is this Islams fault exactly? Im not seeing the connection?

And of course, there is A HUGE misconception amongst many Muslim women that think that a husband needs permission from his wife to get married so they don't even bother.

Again, whats this got to do with it?

My point about morality being derived from religious moral codes is that if you think God allows this sort of behavior then no one is going to change it.
The danger of religious morality is that it is dogmatic and thus, if an absurd law like this one is revealed then no one can change it because it would be blasphemy or whatever. In this respect, secular laws based upon the social contract are better because they are flexible with society so everyone's happiness is maximized.

everyone expect that sister who may want to be a co-wife? or that sister whose husband has died in war and needs a man to raise her kids, namely her sons? or that sister who is at risk of living on the streets and may have no qualifications for a job?

your logic is flawed for the reason that, 1) by the same token of your argument "In this respect, secular laws based upon the social contract are better because they are flexible with society so everyone's happiness is maximized" secular laws present a dangerous aspect: people basing laws on based on their own bias and emotion.

[جوري]

polygamy is an allowance not an injunction.
There will be a subset of the population to whom this is a perfect solution especially in the west where multiple illegitimate relations sprout and likewise the commonality of illegitimate children.
Televangelists I assume would benefit the most and come across less hypocritical because they all say one thing and practice another!
my two cents

:w:

[Predator]

Televangelists I assume would benefit the most and come across less hypocritical because they all say one thing and practice another!
my two cents

Yeah, Jimmy swaggart is one such televangelist

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NErAG0FE_rU

[Lynx]

No it doesn’t. Don’t men die in Iraq, Chechnya, Palestine, etc and leave their wives and children behind?

Sure they do. You did a good job in listing 3 out of 200+ countries.

Co-wives will be always jealous of one another. Women in general can get very jealous over one another it isn’t specific to a marital relationship. You have even sisters being jealous of their sisters in laws or sisters being jealous of the mothers in law (and visa versa)...you have *blood* sisters can get jealous.
What im getting at is that if the husband (or brother or son in the other examples mentioned) are willing to treat the women justly and fairly and has done everything he can do and that is upon him to treat his wives correctly, etc, then why is polygamy the issue here? Why is it getting picked on, if you will? And indeed though women will get jealous over one another, it makes a hell of a difference if the guy takes it upon himself to fulfil his duty towards them.

Because sleeping with another woman causes MUCH greater jealousy than looking at another woman (which he shouldn't be doing either). You can't honestly compare trivial jealousy over something like a new car or over who has the nicest husband with the thought of your spouse going over to another woman's house to sleep with her. Your analogy is a failure.

Looking at it from the perspective of your argument i.e: "Man has to treat all wives fairly so this makes it okay," the fact that he doesn’t care or isn’t fulfilling his duty towards his wives, isn’t polygamy’s fault, because Islam itself has set the guidelines that are incumbent to follow.

I didn't say man has to treat all his wives equally which would make it okay. I said this is one argument I have heard in support of polygamy against the first wife's wishes. In other words, some people say the woman shouldn't complain if he treats her equally. This is contrary to human nature. No man is going to sit around and let his wife sleep with other men so why are women expected to? I can imagine the answer to this but I'll keep it to myself ;D.

Gheerah, jealousy, etc is in the realm of those emotions/entities that people have no physical control over. Why is someone blamed for the emotions that they themselves can’t control? now you can use the argument that “if he wasn’t married to another woman, then she wouldn’t feel jealous.” But this argument is extremely weak and flawed for the reason that you don’t need to be married to someone to feel jealousy over them. Can not a wife feel jealousy if her husband looked at/commented on another woman (not married to her)? Can not a wife feel jealously over her husband if she saw looking at him, etc? Situations like this occur when one isn’t married either...so what difference does it make?

Why would a man comment on another woman to his wife knowing it would cause her jealousy? That is just being a bad person! Anyway, there is such a thing as justified jealousy such as protective jealousy (hence 'gheerah'). Anyway, again you're underestimating the problem here: do you HONESTLY (and I mean think about this to yourself) think that the level of jealousy caused by glancing at another woman is the same as sleeping with that woman?

1. Link for the fatwa? and 2. Daleel for “ [...]since she is forbidding that which Allah has allowed.” Because im gna take it that since it is permitted for a woman to staple in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife, then why would it be counted as forbidding what is permitted? It makes no sense.

Go ask the scholars who say this.

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/S...=1119503543586

Secondly, even if the scholar did rule that, how is that even relevant? She isn’t answering to the scholar at the end of the day, she is answering to Allah

Just pointing out the troubles in the solution of the marriage contract stipulation.

Whats that got to do with Islam though? If the sister is too embarrassed to speak up, or think that she’ll look bad to her family, how is this Islams fault exactly? Im not seeing the connection?

Again, just pointing out the practical problems of the contract solution.

everyone expect that sister who may want to be a co-wife? or that sister whose husband has died in war and needs a man to raise her kids, namely her sons? or that sister who is at risk of living on the streets and may have no qualifications for a job?

Hey if she wants to participate in a polygamous marriage then by all means she should. My point is that doing so without the permission of your first wife is when it becomes problematic and abhorrent. It is institutionalizing cheating. Not as bad as the Shia temporary marriage in terms of destroying the sanctity of marriage and not as bad as holding concubines as the spoils of war. Ha.

your logic is flawed for the reason that, 1) by the same token of your argument "In this respect, secular laws based upon the social contract are better because they are flexible with society so everyone's happiness is maximized" secular laws present a dangerous aspect: people basing laws on based on their own bias and emotion.

The good thing about secular laws is that societies change you can accommodate the chnages with society. Think about it like this: a society is about to enter the age of capitalism and this country needs to adopt the capitalist mode of production if it is going to stay competitive in the world; slavery tends to be bad for the economy because a) they don't get paid so they don't input in the economy and b) slaves aren't the best for skilled labor needed for capitalist production. Now, given this sudden change in society the laws of society might change to accommodate this sudden change and slavery will become outlawed to make way for a greater good for society.

On the other hand, a dogmatic morality might refuse to change because they think their morality is absolute.

Now, I am aware of the things Islam says about slavery so don't get into an argument about how Islam says teach your slaves to read and write and to treat them fairly and to set them free if you can etc. I am aware; what I am saying is if you have a dogmatic belief system then you won't change and there isn't any system on Earth that is going to work in all conditions.

Also, you seem to have only been concerned with situations where polygamy helps community or something but you haven't taken into account where polygamy is used just to satisfy sexual needs.

I wouldn't have a problem if the Quran said it's okay to marry more than 1 wife if you can treat them fairly. and then right after it listed the noble conditions for which you have defended it. Unfortunately such a verse had not been revealed and there is no good Shariah reason to tell a rich man living off oil fields to not marry 3 more wives ontop of his first wife even if she is against it as long as he can divide his wealth evenly and give them their minimum requirements.

[CosmicPathos]

Polygamy has been the way of man since his, supposedly, evolutionary origins. No reason to consider it "immoral" in the 21st century. It is a great thing. Even greater is the fact that Islam acknowledges this fitra and allows man to marry 4 women.

On the other hand, it is Islamically allowed to marry widows and to have sexual relations with them. I cannot fathom marrying and having relations with a widow who used to be the wife of a late Muslim brother.

[Lynx]

Polygamy has been the way of man since his, supposedly, evolutionary origins. No reason to consider it "immoral" in the 21st century. It is a great thing. Even greater is the fact that Islam acknowledges this fitra and allows man to marry 4 women.

On the other hand, it is Islamically allowed to marry widows and to have sexual relations with them. I cannot fathom marrying and having relations with a widow who used to be the wife of a late Muslim brother.

When will Muslims ever learn that just because something is natural it does not follow that it ought to be that way? It is quite sad to see someone in the 21st century appeal to the natural state of man as a basis of what ought our moral standards be.

Ignoring the logical fallacy at hand, just as a side question to you, what do you think of the natural desire of a woman not to share her husband with other women? Isn't that a part of her fitrah too?

[Ummu Sufyaan]

the link wasnt working.

but anyway....

So it not essential that a guy has to tell his first wife if he is to marry again but it is permissible for her to stipulate in her contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife.

so let me get this straight:

Polygamy (to you) still stinks, despite the indisputable fact that she is allowed to stipulate in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife (That alone takes puts out all your other arguments).

Then you come up with some baloney about things which aren’t even relevant to the Islamic perspective of polygamy to begin with, such us backward and retarded cultural practices to support you claim that polygamy ought to be a no-no, despite it being pointed out to you that culture and islam are two separate things which actually results in a unfounded argument on your part

then you have the audacity to come up with some baseless crap on how the marriage contract may not always be applicable/practical, at your own convenience.

if you're going to base your argument on the Islamic perspective of polygamy, you might as well as be consistent in it, something you cant even seem to uphold throughout your own argument.


Im not seeing a how a woman is loosing out here. Sure the husband doesnt have to tell her, but at the same time, she IS permitted to stipulate in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife.

dumb culture isnt islams fault. full stop.

[aadil77]

When will Muslims ever learn that just because something is natural it does not follow that it ought to be that way? It is quite sad to see someone in the 21st century appeal to the natural state of man as a basis of what ought our moral standards be.

Ignoring the logical fallacy at hand, just as a side question to you, what do you think of the natural desire of a woman not to share her husband with other women? Isn't that a part of her fitrah too?

LOL are we talking about moral standards in the 21st century, are there any? Men sleepin around with multiple partners, raping little boys, cheating on wives?

Our whole faith is moral its self let alone bein full of morals, morals came from Allah - not from law made by a few men or the opinions of a few individuals.

In islam we know that jelously can occur between co-wives over the husband, we know this is perfectly normal as it was presented in the example of our Prophet Muhammad, some of his wives showed the same jelously.

Since I'm not a woman I can't say how they'd feel, but since it is made permissable by Allah we know that none of Allah's laws are made difficult to accept.

But for your sake we'll ask the sisters here to let us know how they'd feel, I'm not sure if there are any co-wives on this forum, but there are on ummah forums and they'd don't seem to have any problems.

[CosmicPathos]

When will Muslims ever learn that just because something is natural it does not follow that it ought to be that way? It is quite sad to see someone in the 21st century appeal to the natural state of man as a basis of what ought our moral standards be.

Ignoring the logical fallacy at hand, just as a side question to you, what do you think of the natural desire of a woman not to share her husband with other women? Isn't that a part of her fitrah too?

Well, its not a logical fallacy. Logical fallacies are arguments which are self-contradictory or irrelevant. My argument, even if weaker or based on no ground, is not inherently logically fallacious. It very well could have been true if what I stated was true. Take that.

I do believe that natural things are ought to remain that way. Certain things are not natural, for example man's lifestyle. He started in jungles and now dwells in cities. His body can handle that. So I think that is not unnatural.

But having multiple partners to spread his seed around is the very mechanism that insured his survival. Getting rid of that can be frustrating. So after the demolition of the institution of polygamy, in 21st century we see "innocent relationships" taking its place. A man beds 20 different women in his 20s before he finds the "right one." Then he sings the song "someday I am gonna make you my wife" to her but before that he has bedded 50 different women in his 50 different socially acceptable "innocent and cute valentine-style relations." So is the case with women though.

The strength of women's desire to not "share his husband" with anyone seems unique to humans only and very much dependent on culture! Women from villages cutoff from modern century do not feel any shame in that!

What moral and ethical basis, principles and framework you have to say that "cheating" on one's wife by having relationships with neighbors wife is wrong? both are consensual and it should not piss that woman off whose husband engaged in such consensual relations with other woman, if I go by your godless worldview.

[Danah]

I really wonder about those who are attacking Islam with polygamy and forget that many of their prophets as their holy book said were marrying more than wife...

Twisted Principles.

[CosmicPathos]

I really wonder about those who are attacking Islam with polygamy and forget that many of their prophets as their holy book said were marrying more than wife...

Twisted Principles.

Lynx believes in no holy book.

[Lynx]

the link wasnt working.

but anyway....

So it not essential that a guy has to tell his first wife if he is to marry again but it is permissible for her to stipulate in her contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife.

so let me get this straight:

Polygamy (to you) still stinks, despite the indisputable fact that she is allowed to stipulate in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife (That alone takes puts out all your other arguments).

Then you come up with some baloney about things which aren’t even relevant to the Islamic perspective of polygamy to begin with, such us backward and retarded cultural practices to support you claim that polygamy ought to be a no-no, despite it being pointed out to you that culture and islam are two separate things which actually results in a unfounded argument on your part

then you have the audacity to come up with some baseless crap on how the marriage contract may not always be applicable/practical, at your own convenience.

if you're going to base your argument on the Islamic perspective of polygamy, you might as well as be consistent in it, something you cant even seem to uphold throughout your own argument.


Im not seeing a how a woman is loosing out here. Sure the husband doesnt have to tell her, but at the same time, she IS permitted to stipulate in her marriage contract that she doesn’t want to be a co-wife.

dumb culture isnt islams fault. full stop.

But the fact that he can marry without her permission is what I am condemning. Yes she can by most scholarly accounts, but not all, (sucks if she is raised in an environemtn with a scholar who says no :>) stipulate that her husband cannot marry again BUT why is it allowed in the first place. By allowing it in the first place the Quran allows for exploitation. It would not be a burden to God to add one more ayah: and only if your first wife allows you to. This sounds like an improvement to the quran imO :D. It's like a bad contract deal where in the fine print it says "well btw, you can stipulate that he shouldn't marry again".

Well, its not a logical fallacy. Logical fallacies are arguments which are self-contradictory or irrelevant. My argument, even if weaker or based on no ground, is not inherently logically fallacious. It very well could have been true if what I stated was true. Take that.

No a logical fallacy is an unjustified inference.

Some X's are Y's
Z is an X
Therefore Z is a Y.

The inference to the conclusion is where the fallacy occurs. Notice there isn't any contradiction and it's quite possible that the conclusion is true but to infer the conclusion from those set of premises is where the logical fallacy occurs. Similarly, your previous comment was not only weak but it was a logical fallacy because you inferred from 'the natural state of man' to 'this ought to be the case' without any justification.

But having multiple partners to spread his seed around is the very mechanism that insured his survival. Getting rid of that can be frustrating. So after the demolition of the institution of polygamy, in 21st century we see "innocent relationships" taking its place. A man beds 20 different women in his 20s before he finds the "right one." Then he sings the song "someday I am gonna make you my wife" to her but before that he has bedded 50 different women in his 50 different socially acceptable "innocent and cute valentine-style relations." So is the case with women though.

Well this goes against the fact that there are a lot of men who can stay with one woman and not cheat or anything. It's called self-control and restraint. Anyway, again man is now rational; he can control himself and he ought to control himself. If he can't then he should find a wife that will allow him to marry again if he wants to or not get married at all so that he does not hurt any future wife. Again, if that permission clause was there I would have no problem with it.

The strength of women's desire to not "share his husband" with anyone seems unique to humans only and very much dependent on culture! Women from villages cutoff from modern century do not feel any shame in that!

Again, if the woman is okay with it then go on right ahead.

What moral and ethical basis, principles and framework you have to say that "cheating" on one's wife by having relationships with neighbors wife is wrong? both are consensual and it should not piss that woman off whose husband engaged in such consensual relations with other woman, if I go by your godless worldview.

Consensual means ALL parties have to consent who will be affected. That includes the wife. If she doesn't care and lets the guy go sleep with the girl next door then you can say it's consensual. I am a very conservative person when it comes to sexual behavior so I wouldn't condone such lewd behavior but I don't think it is unethical if all 3 members consented. I have different categorization for such behavior. But yeh, the important thing to remember here is consent has to be given by all parties.


Edit: Oh, and I am not an atheist. I do believe in God just not anything like your God that sends people to Hell for not being convinced by really bad argumentation :D

[Danah]

Lynx believes in no holy book.

I am talking about Christians in general.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

But the fact that he can marry without her permission is what I am condemning. Yes she can by most scholarly accounts, but not all, (sucks if she is raised in an environemtn with a scholar who says no :>) stipulate that her husband cannot marry again BUT why is it allowed in the first place.

why is it allowed for her to to for the "no co-wife" option without his permission? why dont you whine about that?

i dont know why it is allowed, and quite frankly, i dont care. i dont care about something that there is another option to, and even if there wasn't, i still would not care, because that is the law that i believe in, that i know that Allah has perfected. why would i question something i know and believe is perfect and complete?


the laws been set. what is arguing going to do about it? (unless you are genuinely interested in finding an answer and not one of those typical Islam hate mongers who think they've got Islam "uncovered") we are not like other religions or idiotic secular laws where we chop and change according to our whims and desires. dont like it? we dont care. when were we supposed to?
was God waiting for your approval when He sent these laws? what exactly do you hope to achieve with your hate mongering? dont like it? go jump in the lake :D
now was that so hard?

do you think there would be a term 'belief' if there was room for doubt and argument. the fact that people actually dispute a particular authenticity/perfection of a belief, is a clear indication of their lack of conviction in it, not to mention a plain mockery as well coming from those who supposedly believe/follow it. how is someone called a true follower of something when they deem aspects of that "something" incorrect, missing, etc.

this is why i cant take religions/followers (for eg) Christianity (and secular laws) seriosuly (other than the fact that i despise them for their disrespect of Isa, aleyhisalaam- i mean Christians). their Scriptures have been changed by so-called people of integrity, no one knows the chains of authenticity of the scriptures, god knows how many times its been translated and as a result, been lost in translation.

when you understand the term 'belief', then you'll realize how ludicrous and time wasting these debates are.


the amount of time i've *literally* gotten a headache from debates like this, where people cant even seem to grasp and comprehend the basics of how to debate (eg getting the facts straight), let alone getting their points across clearly.

...why whinge when it is permitted to to put in the marriage contract the "no co-wife" option?


perhaps when you stop being so arrogant and sincerely search for the truth (as opposed to throwing child like tantrums in-guise of debate in effort to "expose" Islam) then you might perhaps find your answer. till then, no answer would satisfy people like you expect or us to deny the Quran. not happening.

By allowing it in the first place the Quran allows for exploitation.

now you're just being a drama queen holding onto straw men for the sake of arguing.

It would not be a burden to God to add one more ayah: and only if your first wife allows you to.

says the one who cant even distinguish between Islamic practices and cultural practices, And you want an extra ayah in the quran. pull the other one.

This sounds like an improvement to the quran imO :D

.
i think this forum would majorly improve without emotive people such as yourself.

It's like a bad contract deal where in the fine print it says "well btw, you can stipulate that he shouldn't marry again".

again, the drama queen comes out.

[Grace Seeker]

So you're calling the prophets sinners, you christians really are a unique but misguided bunch

We certainly do call the prophets sinners. We call all persons (save Jesus himself) sinners. Whether it be because of polygamy or something else I'm not arguing, I'm just reminding you that it doesn't defame us to question our calling the prophets sinners, for there is none righteous, there is no one who does good, everyone has turned away from God (see Romans 3:10, Psalm 14:3, Psalm 53:3).

David himself said, "Do not bring your servant into judgment, for no one living is righteous before you" (Psalm 143:2). And his son Solomon reiterated that same thought, "There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins" (Ecclesiastes 7:20).

[Grace Seeker]

polygamy is an allowance not an injunction.
There will be a subset of the population to whom this is a perfect solution especially in the west where multiple illegitimate relations sprout and likewise the commonality of illegitimate children.
Televangelists I assume would benefit the most and come across less hypocritical because they all say one thing and practice another!
my two cents

:w:

Your proposal may sound good on the surface, certainly Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Baker, and unnamed others would "appear" to be more righteous if having multiple wives was condoned. But it would be a false sort of goodness. Rather, just as even though there is no law forbidding it, you still believe that the Qur'an and even the Tanakh speak against Christians who eat pork. So, too, even if polygamy were legitimatized by secular law or popular culture and worldwide acceptance I would still find that the New Testament speaks against Christians who have more than one spouse.


As to the points made by the OP:

I first would like to prove to you that Jesus peace be upon him did honor the laws of the Old Testament, and did order his followers (the Christians as we call them) to follow the laws of the Old Testament:

Jesus said: "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law (the Old Testament) or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke or a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law (the Old Testament) until everything is accomplished. (Matthew 5:17-18)"

Many people mistakenly think that this is a passage which promises there never to be abbrogation of anything found in the Old Testament. Such a belief is a complete lack of understanding of what Jesus was referring to. The only point that they have correct is that Jesus didn't come to abolish the Torah. But go further and see what he did come to do, to fulfill the Torah. The word Torah, even in Jesus' day, could be used in more than one way. The manner in which Jesus uses it is in reference to a Torah way of living. A Torah lifestyle is defined by some as being one that never varies in any degree from all of the ritual and ceremonial laws that are recorded in the Torah. However, if this is the case, then Jesus didn't fulfill that, for the gospels record more than one occassion when Jesus did things that are notable violations of Torah -- working on the Sabbath for example. But Jesus means is that he is living a Torah lifestyle that is totally submitted to God -- not to the ceremonial law, but to God's will -- and we see this as Jesus continually seeks to know and carry out his Father's will in all things. Indeed the climax of that is his willingness to submit even to the cross. And the reason why, is because it too fulfills Torah and by doing so Jesus completed it:

from the Jewish New Testament Commentary, by David Stern

It is true that Yeshua kept the Torah perfectly and fulfilled predictions of the Prophets..."to make full"(plerosai) the meaning of what the Torah and the ethical demands of the Prophets require. Thus he came to complete our understanding of the Torah and the Prophets, so that we can try more effectively to be and do what they say to be and do.

(emphasis original)

And in the cross Jesus, as the perfect-Israelite, does what the nation of Israel was supposed to do but never did, he actually keeps Torah and surrenders himself totally to God's purposes. And because he completes it, the specific provisions of the covenant that it was a sign of become fulfilled. Thus the application of the law is no longer relevant nor complusory on those new folks who will also become God's chosen people through the life giving sacrifice of Jesus.

Jesus' reference to the Law is completely misunderstood when people make it about keeping a bunch of Levitical ceremonial rules, it has nothing to do with them.


And then the OP commits the classic sin of opening mouth and inserting foot with this portion of his post:

Matthew 19:8-9
8 Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."


...I'd like to mention that, first of all, it is important to notice the logical and textual fallacy in the verses. Moses does not permit anything! It was GOD Almighty who supposedly Permitted everything in both the Old Testament and the New one. The reason I am emphasizing on this point, while it might look very minor, is because it goes to further prove that the texts that exist in the Bibles of today, with all of their variant quantity of "books" and "gospels", are not the Original, Pure, unaltered and uncorrupt Holy Word of GOD Almighty. They are rewrites and writings of men's interpretations and narrations of what really took place during Jesus' times, peace be upon him. So what ever you read from the New Testament doesn't mean a whole a lot because it is not the original writing. It is simply man made.

The OP is either ignorant of, or simply choose to ignore, the fact that Jesus is using the colloquial expression wherein the phrase "Moses permitted XYZ" is equivalent to our expression, "The Torah says XYZ." In other words, the OP has made a big deal about nothing.

Finally, some of the OP's efforts at logic can best be described as silly:

Have polygamy been really prohibited by Jesus, Paul would not have told his religious leaders to not practice it!!


Paul would not have seen the need for it! It's like him telling them and only them: "Do not worship idols!"

Yet, we see that Paul did indeed tell them not to worship idols (see 1 Corinthians 12:2, 2 Corinthians 6:16, and 1 Thessalonians 1:9).

Plus, how do you think it is that people like Timothy in the province of Galatia would have received the teachings of Jesus. They would have received it from Paul, Mark, Barnabbas and others who came to visit with them bearing Jesus' message. They didn't hear it directly from Jesus. And his letters are one way of communicating that, a communication that preceed the reception of the teachings of Jesus in a gospel accounting of his life. But when the gospels are produced, we find them not once contradicting Paul's testimony regarding the message of Jesus. If polygamy was acceptable in Judaism (and I do grant that it certainly was in much of the Tanakh), then for what reason would Paul change it accept that his message might be in agreement with that of Jesus himself.

[جوري]

When will Muslims ever learn that just because something is natural it does not follow that it ought to be that way? It is quite sad to see someone in the 21st century appeal to the natural state of man as a basis of what ought our moral standards be.
?

Does that premise hold true for homosexuality as well?

[جوري]

Your proposal may sound good on the surface, certainly Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Baker, and unnamed others would "appear" to be more righteous if having multiple wives was condoned. But it would be a false sort of goodness. Rather, just as even though there is no law forbidding it, you still believe that the Qur'an and even the Tanakh speak against Christians who eat pork. So, too, even if polygamy were legitimatized by secular law or popular culture and worldwide acceptance I would still find that the New Testament speaks against Christians who have more than one spouse.

.

and I think for that reason we'll find that christians father the most amount of illegitimate children while simultaneously having the most amount of adulterous relationships!

all the best

[Grace Seeker]

and I think for that reason we'll find that christians father the most amount of illegitimate children while simultaneously having the most amount of adulterous relationships!

all the best

I would be interested if that is actually factually true or not. The sad thing is that whether it is borne out by actual facts that Christians have more children out of wedlock than any other group of people (I would guess not, I would guess that those with no religion do), that far too many Christians don't practice their faith with the full measure of devotion that they should. Frankly, there is no excuse for it, either. The NT speaks against any form of sexual activity outside the bonds of marriage.

[CosmicPathos]

But the fact that he can marry without her permission is what I am condemning. Yes she can by most scholarly accounts, but not all, (sucks if she is raised in an environemtn with a scholar who says no :>) stipulate that her husband cannot marry again BUT why is it allowed in the first place. By allowing it in the first place the Quran allows for exploitation. It would not be a burden to God to add one more ayah: and only if your first wife allows you to. This sounds like an improvement to the quran imO :D. It's like a bad contract deal where in the fine print it says "well btw, you can stipulate that he shouldn't marry again".



No a logical fallacy is an unjustified inference.

Some X's are Y's
Z is an X
Therefore Z is a Y.

The inference to the conclusion is where the fallacy occurs. Notice there isn't any contradiction and it's quite possible that the conclusion is true but to infer the conclusion from those set of premises is where the logical fallacy occurs. Similarly, your previous comment was not only weak but it was a logical fallacy because you inferred from 'the natural state of man' to 'this ought to be the case' without any justification.



Well this goes against the fact that there are a lot of men who can stay with one woman and not cheat or anything. It's called self-control and restraint. Anyway, again man is now rational; he can control himself and he ought to control himself. If he can't then he should find a wife that will allow him to marry again if he wants to or not get married at all so that he does not hurt any future wife. Again, if that permission clause was there I would have no problem with it.



Again, if the woman is okay with it then go on right ahead.



Consensual means ALL parties have to consent who will be affected. That includes the wife. If she doesn't care and lets the guy go sleep with the girl next door then you can say it's consensual. I am a very conservative person when it comes to sexual behavior so I wouldn't condone such lewd behavior but I don't think it is unethical if all 3 members consented. I have different categorization for such behavior. But yeh, the important thing to remember here is consent has to be given by all parties.


Edit: Oh, and I am not an atheist. I do believe in God just not anything like your God that sends people to Hell for not being convinced by really bad argumentation :D

I do not see how a wife would be effected by the man's relations outside the family with neighbor's wife? the more appropriate question is "Should she be effected?" No.... when humans marry, its not required to not bed outside the family.

Regarding whether men can control to stay single or not, being able to control something does not mean that the thing being controlled is any less valuable. Self restraint and control mean something else in my dictionary. it means to put restrain on logic and follow what is instinctive.

[جوري]

I would be interested if that is actually factually true or not. The sad thing is that whether it is borne out by actual facts that Christians have more children out of wedlock than any other group of people (I would guess not, I would guess that those with no religion do), that far too many Christians don't practice their faith with the full measure of devotion that they should. Frankly, there is no excuse for it, either. The NT speaks against any form of sexual activity outside the bonds of marriage.

I would have to say it is indeed true if the sexual proclivities of preachers are a measure of your average christian .. sadly more so as they are supposed to lead by 'positive' example...

all the best

[Grace Seeker]

I do not see how a wife would be effected by the man's relations outside the family with neighbor's wife? the more appropriate question is "Should she be effected?" No.... when humans marry, its not required to not bed outside the family.

This would seem to be an argument not just for polygamy, but also polygny.

[CosmicPathos]

This would seem to be an argument not just for polygamy, but also polygny.

and polyandry too.

Of course it only applies to a godless world that an atheist lives in.

[Grace Seeker]

and polyandry too.

Of course it only applies to a godless world that an atheist lives in.

Then it doesn't really apply to "Polygamy in Christianity and Islam" does it?

[Lynx]

why is it allowed for her to to for the "no co-wife" option without his permission? why dont you whine about that?

i dont know why it is allowed, and quite frankly, i dont care. i dont care about something that there is another option to, and even if there wasn't, i still would not care, because that is the law that i believe in, that i know that Allah has perfected. why would i question something i know and believe is perfect and complete?


the laws been set. what is arguing going to do about it? (unless you are genuinely interested in finding an answer and not one of those typical Islam hate mongers who think they've got Islam "uncovered") we are not like other religions or idiotic secular laws where we chop and change according to our whims and desires. dont like it? we dont care. when were we supposed to?
was God waiting for your approval when He sent these laws? what exactly do you hope to achieve with your hate mongering? dont like it? go jump in the lake :D
now was that so hard?

do you think there would be a term 'belief' if there was room for doubt and argument. the fact that people actually dispute a particular authenticity/perfection of a belief, is a clear indication of their lack of conviction in it, not to mention a plain mockery as well coming from those who supposedly believe/follow it. how is someone called a true follower of something when they deem aspects of that "something" incorrect, missing, etc.

this is why i cant take religions/followers (for eg) Christianity (and secular laws) seriosuly (other than the fact that i despise them for their disrespect of Isa, aleyhisalaam- i mean Christians). their Scriptures have been changed by so-called people of integrity, no one knows the chains of authenticity of the scriptures, god knows how many times its been translated and as a result, been lost in translation.

when you understand the term 'belief', then you'll realize how ludicrous and time wasting these debates are.


the amount of time i've *literally* gotten a headache from debates like this, where people cant even seem to grasp and comprehend the basics of how to debate (eg getting the facts straight), let alone getting their points across clearly.

...why whinge when it is permitted to to put in the marriage contract the "no co-wife" option?


perhaps when you stop being so arrogant and sincerely search for the truth (as opposed to throwing child like tantrums in-guise of debate in effort to "expose" Islam) then you might perhaps find your answer. till then, no answer would satisfy people like you expect or us to deny the Quran. not happening.




now you're just being a drama queen holding onto straw men for the sake of arguing.



says the one who cant even distinguish between Islamic practices and cultural practices, And you want an extra ayah in the quran. pull the other one.


.
i think this forum would majorly improve without emotive people such as yourself.


again, the drama queen comes out.

ummm okay. are you sure you aren't projecting a little bit there? you sound quite upset. anyway

I don't look for reasons to hate on Islam. I think religion is a great thing and it should be promoted because it makes the world a nicer place. It stresses family cohesion for instance which I am a big supporter of . I do think it isn't perfect and I was inspired to start this thread as some people were claiming that it is the best ruler for morality which it is definitely definitely definitely not.

Skye: Yes it would. If homosexuality was natural we wouldn't be able to infer that it was an acceptable behavior. Conversely, if it's unnatural we wouldn't be able to infer that it was unacceptable.

mad_scientist: I laughed at your post. Good parody.

[CosmicPathos]

ummm okay. are you sure you aren't projecting a little bit there? you sound quite upset. anyway

I don't look for reasons to hate on Islam. I think religion is a great thing and it should be promoted because it makes the world a nicer place. It stresses family cohesion for instance which I am a big supporter of . I do think it isn't perfect and I was inspired to start this thread as some people were claiming that it is the best ruler for morality which it is definitely definitely definitely not.

Skye: Yes it would. If homosexuality was natural we wouldn't be able to infer that it was an acceptable behavior. Conversely, if it's unnatural we wouldn't be able to infer that it was unacceptable.

mad_scientist: I laughed at your post. Good parody.

I was not expecting anything more sophisticated from you either.