Why...

[idk]

Why is it that there are never any muslim couples kissing, holding hands or even hugging in public? Married couples, i mean, lol.

Just wondering cuz since their married they r allowed to kiss n stuff ...

[UmmSqueakster]

AbuS and I hold hands in public and walk arm in arm, but never anything more. Hugging and kissing show physical intimacy that's private between a couple.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

Why is it that there are never any muslim couples kissing, holding hands or even hugging in public? Married couples, i mean, lol.

Just wondering cuz since their married they r allowed to kiss n stuff ...

embarrassment maybe? not shame that they are married/love each other, but genuine shyness that they don't want others to see. besides, whats it got to do with anyone :p

[Yanal]

Bismillah hair-rahmaan nara heem
Well I don't think that is appropitate in public because it will show some annoyed people (who really hate Islam) give a chance to blame us for something a few individuals did. Arm to arm would be ok but kissing lip to lip is not appropiate in a public especially infront of little children who might think it's ok to go up to a two year old and kiss her/him. But it is allowed and is not considered zina.

I apologize for not posting an article with proof but I have found one but can't post the link,inshAllah I will try.

Walakum Asalam Warakmatulah Wabarkatuh
Islamic Bro.

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[The Ruler]

Why is it that there are never any muslim couples kissing, holding hands or even hugging in public? Married couples, i mean, lol.

Just wondering cuz since their married they r allowed to kiss n stuff ...

Be it muslim or no muslim, PDA is this:

Or else it might result in this:

[Güven]

I have seen a couple who were doing that stuff in a train ( in Public) and I found it quite....disgusting.

I felt embarrassed.


I would say ...."GET A ROOM!" :X


Holding hands is acceptable but beyond that , it's better in private.

No one wants to see those things. :skeleton:

[nebula]

today after jummah mashallah i saw a muslim couple, a hijabi lady and a white muslim man mashallah he had a beard and she was wearing a hijab they were walkin down the street hollding hands. I was like "aww man i wish i had a wife" loool! :X

[Yanal]

Bismillah Hair Rahmaan Nara Heem
Whatever happens,when it happens it is in the command and will of Allah. When Allah wills you will inshAllah,along with many other brothers. Brother Abd Al Rahman
Walakum Asalam Warakmatulah Wabarkatuh.
Islamic bro.

[Yanal]

Bismillah Hair Rahmaan Nara Heem

Ruling on kissing one’s wife in the street in front of people

I am in alot of trouble. I can not ask local Iman because he is not good in his knowledge and i am embarassed to ask friends or family. You see, the problem is I got married recently and I think i might of committed zina with my wife. This is how, we were driving my sisters car and me and wife stopped the car in a quiet place and we kissed alot, quite alot. a man walked passed and he saw us, but we did not stop. i feel i have committed open zina. do we need to pay kafarah, or confess to our elders. my second very very important question is after kissing, i let out (we were both wearing clothes all the time mufti saab) sperm in my underwear. Now i feel very bad because this is my sisters car and she has been driving it after me. i can not wash the car seat as she will get suspicious and confront me. i do not want to lie, now she sits in the car sits on the floor to eat dinner, sits on the sofa, her and her children and i feel very very bad as to what to do. is the car and sofa and place were we sit not clean anymore, and my wife and i are arguing she blames me for worrying. i think she is a bad muslim, because she does not fear Allah, becuase she made me stop the car and kiss, i hate her for that. dear sir, i await your reply as i am disturbed by what has happened, i like to keep paak and clean at all times to please Allah.


Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
Please note that you will never be able to live your life without sins and mistakes. This is the nature of man. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Every son of Adam commits sin, and the best of those who commit sin are those who repent.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2499; Ibn Maajah, 4251; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi. This hadeeth clearly indicates that man will inevitably commit sin, but what matters after that is what he does about his sin. The believer repents to Allaah from all his sins, gives them up and asks Allaah for forgiveness every time he commits a sin, and he regrets doing it and resolves sincerely not to do it again. If you do that, then understand that Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful; He forgives all sins for the righteous believer who repents sincerely and admits his sin humbly before Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Say: O ‘Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Zumar 39:53]
The sin that you have admitted to is not zina with your wife! Rather it is kissing her in front of other people, because there is no zina with one's wife, rather zina is done with a woman whom it is not permissible for a man to touch. But in the case of a wife, it is permissible to touch her.
It is not permissible for a man or a woman to speak to anyone else of what happens between them in bed which no one else should see but them, because of the evils and temptations that result from that and because it opens the door to the shaytaan. This has to do with one who speaks about what he did with his wife, so how about one who does things in front of people where they can see him!
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Ibraaheem (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in his Fataawa (10/277) that kissing one’s wife in front of people is not permissible.
Secondly:
As for the expiation for this sin, there is no expiation except sincere repentance and firm resolve not to do it again, and true regret for having committed this sin.
As for confessing to your parents, there is no need for that. The sin that you have admitted to is a sin against Allaah, so confession should be made to Allaah. It is between you and Allaah and you should not tell anyone about it, but be sincere in your repentance to Allaah and Allaah will forgive you. Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
The fact that your wife is the one who told you to do this deed does not mean that she is not a righteous woman or that she does not fear Allaah. You also agreed with her to do it, and you did not stop even when that man saw you. So you should also shoulder your share of responsibility for what you did.
See also questions no. 6103 and 31773.
May Allaah help you to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.
Walakum Asalam Warakmatulah Wabarkatuh.
Islamic Bro

[S_87]

holding hands is fine and common...

[Intisar]

:sl: Cause it's pretty rude, inconsiderate, and immodest. Holding hands is fine, but all that other stuff is so unnecessary. You don't need to prove to anyone that you're a couple.

[IbnAbdulHakim]

coz its yucky and they know it and they KNOW NOT TO SHOW IT


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9m_O1t-2KY



ooor a more mature responce would be:


to protect their modesty, decency... morality .. chastity.

just because your married, doesnt mean you become completely loose.



may Allah guide us all, Ameen

[Najm]

AsSalamOAlaikum WaRehmatuAllah WaBarkatuhu

InshaAllah, lets not go with what's "common", lets go with what the Quran and sunah tells us to do. Alhamdulillah

FiAmaaniAllah

[3isha]

its about having hayah i guess , if they wanna show der affection by no means they can without others being about tho, after all they dnt wanna do it to show people their love

[FatimaAsSideqah]

:sl:

by Al-Bukhaari and Muslim. So, one should observe the Islamic etiquettes when enjoying his wife.

Ibn Qudaamah [from the Hanbali school] said: ‘A husband should not have intercourse with his wife when it is possible for someone else to see them or to hear their noise when copulating. Also, he should not kiss her or touch her in front of the people. Imaam Ahmad said: "For me, it is desirable that he should conceal all of this (i.e. do this in privacy only)."’

If a husband tries to kiss his wife in front of the people, she is obliged to advise him and remind him to fear Allaah and avoid doing so, as this public kissing is the practice of the non-Muslims who have no honour nor dignity nor bashfulness.

[ahmed_indian]

mayb bcoz we muslims have more haya.

and i think kissing and hugging in public places will bring evil thoughts in the minds of others too.

we care for others too who are unmarried or away frm their spouses.

[Halima]

:sl:

A little love and affection when you are married is cool. but People need to give consideration to the other people that are not at that stage yet which can trigger EVIL thoughts into their minds

1) unmarried people
2) people who are divorced
3) CHILDREN
4) Widows
5) Rspect for the elders whos age is wayyyyy up there

so pleasee give consideration. There are places called Hotels and houses and rooms for all that junk.

[syilla]

:salamext:

because we have a home to do the hugging stuffs :D

[Rebel]

Where I live, you risk getting sorted out by the aadaab police if you were caught doing anything of the sort (holding hands is acceptable, anything else is a big no-no). They don't care if you're married :D

Besides, why would you feel the need to do any of that in public :><:?

[Yanal]

^ and where do you live ? Alpha HQ ?:p

[Rebel]

Take a guess. I'll give you 50p if you get it right.

[Yanal]

50p

50 pizzas:exhausted joking England ?

[AabiruSabeel]

^Alpha Jr, I thought you were gone after that emotional thread.

On topic, this has been answered in these two posts here:
http://www.islamicboard.com/1135343-post15.html
http://www.islamicboard.com/1135025-post9.html

[Rebel]

50 pizzas:exhausted joking England ?

Aadaab police in England? Wouldn't that be nice :X

Bahrain.

[Yanal]

AS shhh I am still here:X

[Muezzin]

The best form of PDA is a good verbal sparring match.

Not to be confused with an argument and/or domestic.

[Yanal]

ah. Where did that come from ?

[GuestFellow]

I have seen a couple who were doing that stuff in a train ( in Public) and I found it quite....disgusting.

I felt embarrassed.

Yes I agree. I saw it happen in college unexpectedly and it was rather disgusting.

I do not understand why some people kiss public and get angry if you accidentally look at them unintentionally.

[Clover]

I don't know, we don't have Muslims, can't really say.

I know at our school they finally allowed couples to hold hands, but no hugging or anything else, what's funny I always see 2-3 couples makin out in-between classes lol. I wouldn't mind kissing my girlfriend, or holding hands, hugging, or whatever in public, but making out is kinda stupid to do in public.

[Beardo]

I don't know, we don't have Muslims, can't really say.

I know at our school they finally allowed couples to hold hands, but no hugging or anything else, what's funny I always see 2-3 couples makin out in-between classes lol. I wouldn't mind kissing my girlfriend, or holding hands, hugging, or whatever in public, but making out is kinda stupid to do in public.

No offense, but that's sickening.

The truth is, it has become western culture to hold hands and kiss in public. There's no more modesty these days, unfortunately. So now, we have become accustomed to seeing such things. That's why our children pick up on these things as well. Children can pick up the smallest of details. Like for example, I remember seeing this little girl. You know how parents suck the top of the bottle to make sure milk comes out? The little girl did the same to her doll as well. These small things matter, and have a lasting effect.

[Clover]

No offense, but that's sickening.

The truth is, it has become western culture to hold hands and kiss in public. There's no more modesty these days, unfortunately. So now, we have become accustomed to seeing such things. That's why our children pick up on these things as well. Children can pick up the smallest of details. Like for example, I remember seeing this little girl. You know how parents suck the top of the bottle to make sure milk comes out? The little girl did the same to her doll as well. These small things matter, and have a lasting effect.

Offense taken. I am about tired of this Western Culture crap, as if it's so much better everywhere else.

What?

[Beardo]

I meant to say sickening of the making out in public. Not the kissing/holding hands, just to clarify.

No hard feelings though? :skeleton: I didn't mean it in a rude way. :-[

[Clover]

I meant to say sickening of the making out in public. Not the kissing/holding hands, just to clarify.

No hard feelings though? :skeleton: I didn't mean it in a rude way. :-[

The sickening part is not where I take offense. I take offense at you, like many on here I've noticed, reffering to the West as the reason of decay, or saying it has a worse decay then all other regions.

I find it annoying, but not sickening. If they want to showcase their idiot selves, then let them.

[ragdollcat1982]

I have never been big on PDA. I am very stoic by nature and do not like strangers to know my emotions. I sometimes will hold on to my husbands arm, but nothing more than that. For me this is a personal preferenance.

[GuestFellow]

The sickening part is not where I take offense. I take offense at you, like many on here I've noticed, reffering to the West as the reason of decay, or saying it has a worse decay then all other regions.

I find it annoying, but not sickening. If they want to showcase their idiot selves, then let them.

Yes I understand. It's not right to make negative generalisation of the West.

I think we need to improve the communication between the East and West, to clarify these misconceptions.

[Yanal]

Well in my school during breaks some couples make out making me feel like vomiting:<>: but inshAllah that will stop.

[ragdollcat1982]

Well in my school during breaks some couples make out making me feel like vomiting:<>: but inshAllah that will stop.

Im with you. During my decandant promiscious past (which I am not proud of) I still thought PDA such as making out were sickening. Hand holding among married couples is ok with me, but I think anything else should be reserved for the privacy of ones home.

[Güven]

I meant to say sickening of the making out in public. Not the kissing/holding hands, just to clarify.

No hard feelings though? :skeleton: I didn't mean it in a rude way. :-[

I find kissing in public just as disgusting , maybe even more.

Im not talking about kissing eachothers cheek orsomething but the "other one".

like you trying to walk peacefully on the streets and some couple before your eyes are kissing eachother without shame at all....and once you (accidentally) got a glance of it , it will be stuck on your mind the whole day. +o(

[Yanal]

Yeh Guven I agree,as then the Shytaan will tempt you into doing wrong things. And they have a home they should do that there. May Allah save me and Guven with the resto of you from this and grant our families heaven. Ameen!

[Güven]

The sickening part is not where I take offense. I take offense at you, like many on here I've noticed, reffering to the West as the reason of decay, or saying it has a worse decay then all other regions.

I find it annoying, but not sickening. If they want to showcase their idiot selves, then let them.

now hold on there.

Let me tell you something about "The West"

When "some" People insult Islam (including Political Leaders) , when they Insult The Qu'ran , Our sisters , our Prophet etc. and When they generalise us for being terrorists , for being barbaric etc. and when we get irritated and angry , what excuse do they bring up?

"It's our freedom of speech"

Now Im telling you the same thing : It's their(those who believe only the west is to blame) Freedom of speech

Now you know how WE feel when we are being generalised!

[Muezzin]

Guys, generalisations really have no place in this thread.

The reason Islam limits forms of Public Displays of Affection is related to modesty. That is all.

[~Taalibah~]

I think i'm late to reply, but i have to say i agree with those who say its disgusting+o(
And absolutely immodest for Muslims.
:w:

[Muezzin]

The original question has been answered. The thread is deviating into generalisations from some people. I'm going to close it.