format_quote Originally Posted by
peace_2all
JazakAllah SamyD for your advice, the only thing is though i am not looking to marry right now, inshAllah in a couple of years time, im not even sure if i want to marry my ex, this is why i want to do istikhaara to seek guidance from Allah as to who i should consider for marriage as i am not sure myself, i think for the time being i should try to stop speaking to him, then pray istikhara and take it from there. JazakAllah for your advice though i appreciate it
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb my sister jazakallah khayran for sharing your problems with us and being so open otherwise you would be left confused of what to do like most young couples are who are in this situation.
My sister what we have to realise is that shaythan does everything gradually and cleverly. He first makes it out like it is innocent if two people get to know each other and become friends. Then when they become friends they inevitabley will start to fall for each other because Allah has created man and women to be attracted to each other.
Then one thing leads to another and eventually zina may take place and many people think it will never happen to them but if they carry on with their relationship then eventually it does.
Haraam relationships have no peace and blessings in them then it will leave both if not at least one of the couple scarred, hurt and in pain and it will affect them for a very long time causing depression and losing the will to live and carry on.
This is the desperate state that haraaam relationships can get people into and trust me it has happened and is still happening to COUNTLESS of our brothers and sisters today!
My sister the amount of girls and boys nowadays who get lead on, played and used is unbelievable. How do you know he is not doing the same? Most of the people its happened to NEVER have thought that their partners would do that to them. These are the results of a haraam relationship because a relationship is NOT a guarantee for marriage at all and most of the time the couple end up getting used, abused, lead on, played and treated badly.
You said it yourself sister when you speak with him you get evil thoughts. This is shaythan filling evil in your heart and lust, temptation and desires. Shaythan is wanting to ignite passion in your heart and lure you into evil.
My sister it is crucial for your own imaan that you cease talking to him immediatley and that you save yourself from destruction.
It is bad enough as it is sister for the couple to go behind their parents back and have a haraam relationship but what about in front of Allah? Are the couple not ashamed? Do they not know that Allah sees EVERYTHING? Just because we can't see Allah it does'nt mean he cannot see EVERYTHING we are doing!
Let us feel ashamed of ourselves for sinning so much when we know and realise that Allah is watching our EVERY move. Will we then not have shame and stop this evil?
Sister it is Allah who has made your heart inclined to stop this evil and to come on here so that we can tell you to stop immediatley and that there is NOTHING but heartache, pain and waste of ones precious time in getting involved in such relationships aswell as gaining the wrath and anger of Allah!
Repent as much as you can my sister and ask Allah to forgive you for ever involving yourself in such a relationship.
Just because a person is a haafiz of the Qur'an it does'nt make them pious or a good person because my sister the haafiz of the Qur'an have a bigger responsibility to stop evil because they have been given the Qur'an in their hearts and for them to committ such evil with the Qur'an in their hearts is even more of a major sin so you should warn him about this. Jahannam will be filled with scholars of Islam and haafiz because they did not fulfill their obligations from having knowledge and quran in their hearts.
My sister know that if you go towards Allah FULLY and rely on him, trust in him, have hope in him and have FULL reliance in him and abide by his commandments FULLY and ALWAYS ask of him no matter what it is then surely he will do whats best for you in your life and that includes who you marry but my sister let us go about finding a partner in the right way and we will have a life full of blessings, peace and tranquility but if we do things the wrong way then it is inevitable that things will go wrong and we will be in pain and in sorrow.
My sister there is no time like the present to go towards Allah FULLY and be the closest to him. These 9 days before Eid are blessed and the best time as any to try and be the closest to Allah.
We do not know when our time is up so let us make the best use of every second of our life before our last second is up.
My sister make the best of your youth for Alllah loves the worship of a person in their youth. When were old and withered then it is not the same.
Here are some VERY useful and beneficial links for you to benefit from and please pass on to others aswell.
10 steps to increase our imaan(faith)
http://www.sunniforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=40459
Forty Good Deeds to do Everyday!
http://www.sunniforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=50628
Nafl Salaahs to Pray Everyday
http://www.sunniforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=49289
10 Steps to Maximising the First Ten Days of Dhul Hijjah
http://www.islamicboard.com/umrah-ha...ul-hijjah.html
My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!
http://www.islamicboard.com/manners-...hip-check.html