Choosing a Major

[Beardo]

My parents want me to do Medicine or Engineering. (Needless to say that I am Desi.)

Yet, those two subjects are the ONLY two subjects I refuse to study. I want to go into Business Admin, Economics, etc, in that genre. I would like to study History/English as well, but that's probably even more unacceptable.

So my question is... Should I remain steadfast in my decision? I mean, it's my life at the end of the day and I have to live with my degree. I honestly cannot stand seeing me work on Computer Programming 10 hours a day, 5 days a week. You have no time for anything else, and being on the computer the whole day in such a restricted, mathematical environment would make anyone cranky.

In addition, everyone I know that has a computer science degree says they hate their jobs and they wish they never chose it. And I'm talking about 5-10 people. I gave it a try this semester but I do not want to do it. I'm finishing the course because I started it, but I can't live my life like that.

Any advice? :hmm:

[CosmicPathos]

My parents want me to do Medicine or Engineering. (Needless to say that I am Desi.)

Yet, those two subjects are the ONLY two subjects I refuse to study. I want to go into Business Admin, Economics, etc, in that genre. I would like to study History/English as well, but that's probably even more unacceptable.

So my question is... Should I remain steadfast in my decision? I mean, it's my life at the end of the day and I have to live with my degree. I honestly cannot stand seeing me work on Computer Programming 10 hours a day, 5 days a week. You have no time for anything else, and being on the computer the whole day in such a restricted, mathematical environment would make anyone cranky.

In addition, everyone I know that has a computer science degree says they hate their jobs and they wish they never chose it. And I'm talking about 5-10 people. I gave it a try this semester but I do not want to do it. I'm finishing the course because I started it, but I can't live my life like that.

Any advice? :hmm:

Why dont you like medicine? In the end do something which you like and which will help your unique persona to do what Allah wants you to do. Parent's wishes must be recognized and respected but not necessarily obeyed if they are not of such nature.

[Maryan0]

Parents are parents particularly immigrant parents all want their kids to be doctors, I don't know why?:hmm: You should major in what you want and will give you job satisfaction in the future you don't want to end up in a career that you don't like and you can't get out of because you invested so much time and money in it. but you shouldnt disregard your parents wishes, explain your choices to them and always abtain their blessings in whatever you do.
salam

[Beardo]

I respect their wishes, and it does give me the confidence that they think I'm good enough for a degree of such caliber. It is only because I respect their wishes that I am abstaining from History and English.

Everyone cannot be a doctor or an engineer. To be honest, I would actually love to be a doctor but I have better plans for my years than to take a humongous loan and spend over a decade of my life to reach the desired salary and pay off the debt. Plus, I am very sensitive to seeing blood etc... Long story about that. I get a little nauseated.

Anyway, about Engineering... I've seen Engineers. Their life is office - home, office-home. There is no extra curricular time.

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[Life_Is_Short]

I understand what you are going through. :(

[Beardo]

I understand what you are going through. :(

I highly doubt that. Highly, highly doubt that.

Anyway, I'm probably going to end up doing CS and live a robotic life of programming and engineering. As sad as that may be.

[Life_Is_Short]

I highly doubt that. Highly, highly doubt that.

Why? :hiding:

[Life_Is_Short]

Don't end up doing something chosen for you by your parents, or the desire to make money, or prestige—or sheer inertia. You should be doing something you not only enjoy, but admire. Think of the future, where do you see yourself in 10, 20, 50 years? Do you really want to live in a world where you are doing something you don't like?

It is not worth suffering through something if you don't enjoy it.

[Woodrow]

Keep in mind choosing a major does not always lead to a career in the expected field. depending if you use the major as an end or as a beginning. It is only a small percentage of those who choose a premed major that go on to Med School. Most schools do not have an actual premed major but have a premed program in which the student selects a preferred major such as biology or chemistry and additional courses related to the field. Since most will never be accepted for med school it also helps prepare them for alternative career selections.

An actual pre-med major is a poor choice because if the graduate is not accepted for Med school, it ends up as wasted years of study, with no alternate preparation.

The same can be said for engineering.

So I suggest you check out the pre-med or pre-engineering PROGRAMS
available to you and from there check out the Majors acceptable for either. Choose the program that pleases your family and select the major that suits you. As you pursue your own aptitudes and desires will become the deciding factor as to if you will continue in Med or engineering or be directed towards an alternative career choice.

You are in the very early days of your undergrad years. Right now your preparation is to concentrate on acceptance into a graduate program. Each step will take you in the direction of either an immediate career or further preparation for a differnt career. Always think in terms of alternate careers as you travel through the halls of academia and never look at not being accepted in a career as failure, look at it as success in being guided to the career best for you.

[CosmicPathos]

Parents are parents particularly immigrant parents all want their kids to be doctors, I don't know why?:hmm: You should major in what you want and will give you job satisfaction in the future you don't want to end up in a career that you don't like and you can't get out of because you invested so much time and money in it. but you shouldnt disregard your parents wishes, explain your choices to them and always abtain their blessings in whatever you do.
salam

I am sorry to say but this is a gross generalization. What do you mean by immigrants? If you are talking about the North Americas, where I live, then do know that Caucasians here are also immigrants, they just do not want it to be public. The land was stolen from the natives. I digress.

If you look at the class profile of medical schools across North America, the locals outweigh the "immigrants" that you talk about in the classes. Mind looking at facts first? Yes, many desi brown people want their children to be doctors, so do "non-immigrant" white people. And so do the Chinese. They want it because its a respectable profession and requires higher amount of mental ability and personal qualities as well. If you talk to doctors who graduate from American medical schools, most of them are the most versatile people you will ever meet. You will see musicians, olympic medalists, dancers, scientists etc among them. Its a sought-after profession. Thats why most people want it.

[Maryan0]

I am sorry to say but this is a gross generalization. What do you mean by immigrants? If you are talking about the North Americas, where I live, then do know that Caucasians here are also immigrants, they just do not want it to be public. The land was stolen from the natives. I digress.

If you look at the class profile of medical schools across North America, the locals outweigh the "immigrants" that you talk about in the classes. Mind looking at facts first? Yes, many desi brown people want their children to be doctors, so do "non-immigrant" white people. And so do the Chinese. They want it because its a respectable profession and requires higher amount of mental ability and personal qualities as well. If you talk to doctors who graduate from American medical schools, most of them are the most versatile people you will ever meet. You will see musicians, olympic medalists, dancers, scientists etc among them. Its a sought-after profession. Thats why most people want it.

umm it was a joke i'm an immigrant myself and yes us "immigrants" "desi" or not put great emphasis on specific careers particularly doctors and anything in the medical field.
salam

[Beardo]

umm it was a joke i'm an immigrant myself and yes us "immigrants" "desi" or not put great emphasis on specific careers particularly doctors and anything in the medical field.
salam

All taken in good fun. :D

But really though. It's so stressful. I'm researching a bit on the major and taking out some convincing points to present before the higher authorities. :X

[syilla]

I wish 'I' can change my major too...huhu

I think you better be steadfast in your decision... :hiding: Especially if your parents are okay with it.

[Beardo]

I wish 'I' can change my major too...huhu

I think you better be steadfast in your decision... :hiding: Especially if your parents are okay with it.

Are or aren't okay with it? :X

[syilla]

Are or aren't okay with it? :X

you mean your parents aren't okay with it?

Then i'm very sorry... i can't help you much. :hmm:

[Beardo]

you mean your parents aren't okay with it?

Then i'm very sorry... i can't help you much. :hmm:

:exhausted

Anyone else got some tips or advice? :hmm:

[syilla]

^^^ akhee...but i know alot of engineers who at the end of day work in IT industry. Even those who are major in chemical engineering :hmm:

Maybe you should try to f ind something that can satisfy both yourself and your parents

[Umm Hadiyyah]

:sl:

Higher Authorities?? That was pretty humorous lol. As the majority of the brothers and sisters said, "Choose a major which you take joy in, and that gives you personal fulfillment." Yes, it's completely understandable that you want to take your parents recommendations into consideration, but you always have the option of not necessarily following through with their "intended plan." We're all faced with the decision of deciding what career path to follow in our college years, and it's completely okay to change majors here and there. Studies actually shows 80% of college undergrads. change majors at least once in their college careers. Play around a bit, try getting volunteer or internship opportunities in your intended career, whatever that might be.Make sure to update your parents, and pray salah istikhara inshallah. Hope everything works out for you inshallah.

:wa:

Highest Regards,

Umm Hadiyyah

[Beardo]

:sl:

Higher Authorities?? That was pretty humorous lol. As the majority of the brothers and sisters said, "Choose a major which you take joy in, and that gives you personal fulfillment." Yes, it's completely understandable that you want to take your parents recommendations into consideration, but you always have the option of not necessarily following through with their "intended plan." We're all faced with the decision of deciding what career path to follow in our college years, and it's completely okay to change majors here and there. Studies actually shows 80% of college undergrads. change majors at least once in their college careers. Play around a bit, try getting volunteer or internship opportunities in your intended career, whatever that might be.Make sure to update your parents, and pray salah istikhara inshallah. Hope everything works out for you inshallah.

:wa:

Highest Regards,

Umm Hadiyyah

Jazakumullahu Khair. That was very beneficial!

Well, I am currently taking an internship in journalism Alhamdulillah. But that's not my intended major.

I took a course in CS, and am so far not liking it. I took a course in Econ last semester and loved it! So based off that, I am making my decision.

You can balance just so many opinions on one plate. :hmm: I sincerely wish I had time for them all, but with the limited number of time, I must choose whichever I am most suitable in living with.

Perhaps CS would be more prestigious, easier to find a job, and most likely higher paying. It's really all so stressful.

I have never been so concerned in and about my life as I am this semester.

[Maryan0]

All taken in good fun. :D
Alhamdulilah I didn't mean it an offensive manner.
But really though. It's so stressful. I'm researching a bit on the major and taking out some convincing points to present before the higher authorities.

My parents also wanted me to go to medical school or at the very least study nursing. I'm guessing that they want you to be a doctor because Doctors and nurses like teachers are guaranteed jobs and are always needed everywhere in the world, so research would be a great next step in convincing your parents. Show them how many good jobs you can get in the subject you want to major in. They probably don't want you to study a course with very little job prospects.
salam

[Woodrow]

In some ways I am envious that your family has an interest in your education. My family was also immigrants, but from a culture that frowned upon formal education and saw a college degree as a disgrace, as to them it meant the person was either too lazy or too ignorant to get a Job. I was the first person In my family history to go past grade school. It was a battle and I had to break free from a lot of cultural ideas.

Look at your families concerns that you get a good education as a sign of love from them, and as you travel through your education slowly and lovingly explain to them the value of finding the path you will be most successful at, which is a career you can enjoy working it.

[AabiruSabeel]

:sl:

Anyway, I'm probably going to end up doing CS and live a robotic life of programming and engineering. As sad as that may be.

Do istekhara first. And CS is not the only field of Engineering. There are tons of other branches that you might like.

[The Ruler]

If you aim for medicine, you can pretty much end up doing any other degree you want. Or that's how it works here in the Kingdom.

[Beardo]

If you aim for medicine, you can pretty much end up doing any other degree you want. Or that's how it works here in the Kingdom.

You mean the United Kingdom or the Kingdom which you supposedly dominate?

[The Ruler]

You mean the United Kingdom or the Kingdom which you supposedly dominate?

That's print screen worth.

But really, the latter. Because that pretty much covers all civilized lands.

[Intisar]

You can always double major in something, or minor in something else you're interested in. College is a period of self-discovery so maybe you should go undecided for the first year then choose a major when you find something you're interested sophomore year. I'm pretty sure that ten years from now a bachelor's degree will replace a high school diploma so you're gonna have to go to grad school anyway.

[Marjona]

Dear friend

As a student of English department i can tell u this it is very interesting and compared to other faculties easier...u only have to read and analyze most of the time...but about ur parents wanting u to be smone else in life...i think u shell do wht u want....ofcourse we have to respect and listen to everything parents say...but once u unhappy with wht u do ...u`ll be stressed and unhappy in ur working life...do wht u love doing study wht u love studying...

[Muhammad]

:sl:

Try to discuss this issue with your parents (which you probably are doing), and explain exactly why you don't want to do Medicine/Engineering. Try and get their approval in doing something that you know you will be happy doing Insha'Allaah. There might be some compromise involved, but you do need to bear in mind that if you have no interest/motivation in a subject, it will be very difficult to succeed in it - especially something as intensive as Medicine. So I think open communication is one of the key things here as it may help both sides to understand and arrive at a solution. And above all, pray Istikhaarah and make plenty of du'aa to Allaah (swt) to guide you and help you to choose the right path.

May Allaah (swt) guide you to what is best for your deen and dunyaa, Aameen.

[Woodrow]

:sl:

Discuss your desires with your family. Point out to them the related jobs in each field.

Here is a link to the Dictionary of Occupational Titles. This is a listing of basically every job title in the USA. When you go to the contents you will notice that jobs are divided into 9 different categories. The first step will be for you and your parents to come to an agreement over a job grouping and from there begin to fine tune until you can find several jobs you all will be pleased with.

http://www.occupationalinfo.org/

To help here is a listing of job outlooks and projected needs. Here is a link for the Occupational Outlook Handbook and use it as a guide in selecting what occupation that intrest you as a reasonable expectation for employment in and typical salaries to be expected.

http://www.bls.gov/oco/

Quite often there is a surplus of Doctors and when that happens, Usually the cost of med school increases and the likelihood of being accepted for med school decreases.

That can happen in some engineering fields. In the 1950s Petroleum Engineering was the highest paid occupation in the USA but by the mid 1960s there was a huge surplus and salaries dropped. Most of the graduates in Petroleum Engineering never did find work in their chosen field.

Look through those 2 books and use them as a guide to come to a career choice you can all agree on.