Mahr

[hijabi66]

Assalamu 3alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

Could anyone kindly advise about mahr. I married a year ago al7amdulillah and although we agreed on a set amount for mahr, it has not been paid yet and I am not sure why. We did not agree to defer it. When I speak to my husband now about it, he says it was more important for us to have money for the rent for a flat and for the furniture and after all that, he did not have much money left. And then he was made redundant and now we have no money.

What is my position here? What are my rights?

Just out of interest, if we divorced, would I be entitled to claim this mahr and any monies I have personally given to him during our financial difficulties? I am also left in a very bad financial situation now.

Jazakallahu khair for, insha'Allah, any reponses

Assalamu 3alaikum

[Ummu Sufyaan]

wa alaykum us-Salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu

your mahr is one of your rights :(
your parents shouldn't have given you away to him until he paid it...

i suggest you go to a reliable allim (who doesn't know either of you) and ask him about this matter.

[hijabi66]

Wa3alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

Jazakillahu khair for your reply; I am a convert (before I met husband) and so my father (mother, Allah swt mercy her, passed away) would not have known about this.

With the flat, all monies had to be paid up front, about 4 cheques - we do not live in the UK, and this took up most of his capital and so as far as he was concerned, we needed a place to live and the funds to do this. I don't believe this was intentional but i feel disappointed that one of my rights has not been fulfilled yet of course by him giving me his mahr which may have left us in a difficult position, I wouldn't have wanted to have made things difficult financially by demanding this. I am very confused, he is a good man, al7amdulillah, but sometimes I feel as a convert, perhaps my seeming lack of knowledge sometimes, puts me in a vulnerable position.

Neither of us are working at the moment so of course its impossible to ask for this, but I would expect him, once he gets a position, to pay this to me.

I know that many marriages suffer and arguments are caused by financial matters and I therefore don't want to keep raising this subject with him and seem greedy and materialistic, but i would have thought he would have thought about his obligations and my rights at the time of marriage and budgeted accordingly. Even if I had been given it, with our current situation, it would go towards our living expenses anyway!

I just wanted clarification which al7amdulillah you have given me.

Wa3alaikum assalam

[أبو سليمان عمر]

yes the mahr is your right
as for money you GAVE him he doesnt have to pay it back if you GAVE it to him if you lent it to him then yes he does have to