What is the ideal Muslim husband?

[sabr*]

سم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Bismillā hir Rahmā nir Rahīm
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Is the ideal Muslim husband a medical doctor, an engineer, multi-millionaire.

Is the ideal Muslim husband humble, gentle, kind, considerate, caring, loving, open to good advice, willing to cooperate with others in the family rather than dictate rules, helpful in the house, involved in raising the children, and never abusive either physically or mentally.

Use the Quran and Sunnah to show what you think is the ideal Muslim Husband. Insha Allah

This thread was created with the best intentions. Any positive feedback would be appreciated and encouraged.

Jazakumullahu Khair

[Ummu Sufyaan]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
is it ok if our answers are not based on the Quran and Sunnah as some of us may not have that knowledge.

[mudassara]

waalaiykum-as-Salaam,

A look at the matrimonial section of an Islamic magazine will quickly demonstrate that many Muslim men and women do not know what an ideal Muslim husband is. Muslim men looking for wives advertise themselves as doctors, engineers, and financially secure. Muslim women appear to be on the lookout for an established professional or more likely a handsome MD. Rarely do Muslim men and women even mention character, religious convictions, and attitudes as a priority. At most, they might be mentioned as a sidebar. It seems that many of us believe that a man is an ideal Muslim husband if he is handsome, makes a lot of money, and comes from an influential family. And the divorce rate among Muslims continues to rise.

We should select the our life partners on the basis of:
As Muslims, we must base our judgment on what makes an ideal Muslim husband on the guidance of Allah and the example of Prophet Muhammad (SAWS).
Not on the standards of a TV sitcom, the culture in which we were born, or our own materialistic mentality.

[sabr*]

waalaiykum-as-Salaam,

A look at the matrimonial section of an Islamic magazine will quickly demonstrate that many Muslim men and women do not know what an ideal Muslim husband is. Muslim men looking for wives advertise themselves as doctors, engineers, and financially secure. Muslim women appear to be on the lookout for an established professional or more likely a handsome MD. Rarely do Muslim men and women even mention character, religious convictions, and attitudes as a priority. At most, they might be mentioned as a sidebar. It seems that many of us believe that a man is an ideal Muslim husband if he is handsome, makes a lot of money, and comes from an influential family. And the divorce rate among Muslims continues to rise.

We should select the our life partners on the basis of:
As Muslims, we must base our judgment on what makes an ideal Muslim husband on the guidance of Allah and the example of Prophet Muhammad (SAWS).
Not on the standards of a TV sitcom, the culture in which we were born, or our own materialistic mentality.

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

mudassara:

You couldn't have illuminated the topic any better. That is exactly what has occurred for centuries. The use of the Quran and Sunnah as a guide has been replaced with tribal and cultural tastes.

The Muslim Marriage Process:

http://www.islamicboard.com/family-s...e-process.html

Treating women with respect:

Surah Nisa 4:19

O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will, and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr you have given them, unless they commit open illegal sexual intercourse. And live with them honourably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good. (Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan translation)

the Husbands obligations.

(1) Maintenance

The husband is responsible for the wifes maintenance. This right is established by authority of the Qur'an and the sunnah. It is inconsequen tial whether the wife is a Muslim , non-Muslim, rich, poor, healthy or sick. A component of his role as "qawam" (leader) is to bear the financial responsibility of the family in a generous way so that his wife may be assured security and thus perform her role devotedly.

The wifes maintenance entails her right to lodging, clothing, food and general care, like medication, hospital bills etc. He must lodge her where he resides himself according to his means. The wifes lodge must be adequate so as to ensure her privacy, comfort and independence.

If a wife has been used to a maid or is unable to attend to her household duties, it is the husbands duty to provide her with a maid if he can afford to do so. The prophet is reported to have said: The best Muslim is one who is the best husband.

(2) "Mahr "

The wife is entitled to a marriage gift that is her own. This may be prompt or deferred depending on the agreement between the parties. A marriage is not valid without mahr. It does not have to be money or gold. It can be non-material like teaching her to read the Qur'an. " Mahr" is a gift from the groom to the bride. This is the Islamic law, unlike some cultures whereby the brides parents pay the future husband to marry the daughter. This practice degrades women and is contrary to the spirit of Islam. There is no specification in the Qur'an as to what or how much the Mahr has to be. It depends on the parties involved.

(3) Non-material rights.

A husband is commanded by the law of Allah to treat his wife with equity, respect her feelings and show kindness and consideration, especially if he has another wife. The prophet last sermon stresses kindness to women.

Jazakumullahu Khair

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[sabr*]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
is it ok if our answers are not based on the Quran and Sunnah as some of us may not have that knowledge.

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ummu Sufyaan:

Make every attempt to research the obligations Allah and the example of the Prophet Muhammad
(صلى الله عليه و سلم) issued to Muslim husbands. This will provide you with the opportunity to become knowledgable on the Ideal Muslim Husband. As Muslims we are not perfect but we at least should make every effort to implement Islam and not our own opinions. That is one reason the Ummah is in a disarray.

www.islamiccity.com

[Ummu Sufyaan]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
^ i understand that, your first post sort of sounds like you were asking from a point of view strictly from the quran and sunnah, without our personal opinions.

[Rhubarb Tart]

Husband should provide for wife and children
Narrated by 'Aisha : Hind (bint 'Utba) said, "O Allah's Apostle! Abu Sufyan is a miser. Is there any harm if I take of his property what will cover me and my children's needs?" The Prophet said, "Take (according to your needs) in a reasonable manner.

[Rhubarb Tart]

Calling one's wife with the name she loves most or with a nickname or a musical name is one of the forms of pampering and being kind to one's wife. This can be seen in the life of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) who, in a saying 'Hadith' that is agreed upon by scholars, used to say to his wife ‘A’isha: "O ‘A’ish, this is Gabriel saying peace be upon you.” She replied:” and may peace and Allah’s Mercy and Blessings be upon him. You see what I don’t” (She meant the messenger of Allah (PBUH)

He also used to call ‘A’isha: (Homayraa') a short form of ("Hamraa’) which, according to Ibn Kathir in 'An Nehaya’, means the white skinned woman. Adh-dhahabi also said that "Hamraa'" in the language of the people of 'Hejaz' means white and blushing-a rare feature among them. So Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) used to treat ‘A’isha kindly and call her with lovely names.
From the prophetic traditions ‘A’isha narrated about fasting; Imam Muslim reported that she said: ‘The messenger of Allah (PBUH) used to kiss one of his wives while fasting, and then she laughs, may Allah be pleased with her.

In another prophetic tradition narrated by ‘A’isha, she said that Muhammad (PBUH) said that the best of the believers is the one who is best in manners and kindest to his own wife.
Cuddling and being kind to one's wife has a tremendous emotional effect on her. This action of following the example of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) costs a man nothing and grants him Allah's reward, his wife's love and cooperation. Therefore a man is commanded to cuddle and treat his wife kindly.

[sabr*]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
^ i understand that, your first post sort of sounds like you were asking from a point of view strictly from the quran and sunnah, without our personal opinions.

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ummu Sufyaan:

I am still perplexed by your inquiries regarding using your own personal opinion verses the guide of Quran and the Sunna of Prophet Muhammad
(صلى الله عليه و سلم).

The Islamic Board is here as a tool to increase our understanding of Islam. I would prefer to receive that guidance based upon Quran and Sunna with a personal opinion no where in sight.

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

sweet106:

Sukranallah for your positive post.

Jazakumullahu Khair

[Sister Unknown]

Wa Alaykum Salam

Well, I think it depends on what sort of teh Qur'aan and the Sunna. You have permitted and mustehab, etc...

I believe that it is better for a Muslim to be poor rather than rich. Even if he was rich, he can't keep extras , etc.. If that makes sense.

I think a husband should be someone firm.

Here is good info:


Allah Subahnu Wa Ta'ka says in his noble Quran : {Verily in the messenger of Allah ye have a good example for him who looketh unto Allah and the Last Day, and remembereth Allah much.}[ Sura Al-Ahzaab: verse 21].

The aboev verse talks about itself so there is no need to explain it. Inshallah, through the Hadith we shall go thru today we can benefit from our best and only example in this life; the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم ).

Narrated Anas: While the Prophet was in the house of one of his wives, one of the mothers of the believers sent a meal in a dish. The wife at whose house the Prophet was, struck the hand of the servant, causing the dish to fall and break. The Prophet gathered the broken pieces of the dish and then started collecting on them the food which had been in the dish and said, "Your mother (my wife) felt jealous." Then he detained the servant till a (sound) dish was brought from the wife at whose house he was. He gave the sound dish to the wife whose dish had been broken and kept the broken one at the house where it had been broken [Sahih Bukhari: Volume 7, Book 62, Number 152: ]

This Hadith contains a beautiful combination of our beloved prophet ( صلى الله عليه و سلم ) guidance for how Husband should deal with his wife. We shall, inshallah, explore the fiqh of this beautiful hadith together.

A) Be More Understanding to your wife nature

A husband should be more understanding to the nature of woman especially at the time when she acts out of Jealousy.

That is why we can see the prophet acting wisely as he understood the nature of his wife so well so that he distnguish that such act she has done was out of jealousy. this understanding was tranmslated by giving her the excuse for what she did.

B) Be part of the solution not part of the problem:

A husband should always be involved as part of the solution rather than isolating himself from the situation or being part of the problem.

The prophet (صلوات ربي و سلامه عليه ) acted while being aware of the people who is concerende with this issue i..e his wife, the servant and the other wife ( May Allah be pleased with them). Thus, he started solving the problem with the first more hurt because of this, which is the servant since the wife of the prophet who sent him will ask him about the plate, he was affected by the act itself due to the broken dish incident. He ( صلى الله عليه و سلم ) calmed the servant indirectly by reminding him that the one who struck the dish is his mother ( mother of believer) then added that jealousy is what drove her to do so therefore her action can be excused at that moment. Furthermore, the prophet did not only utter words to calm down the situation but also participated in actions when he collected the broken dish.

C) Firmness

The Prophet ( صلى الله عليه و سلم ) firmness was clearly implemented by holding his wife responsible for her actions in spite of the fact what she did was excusable because of her jealousy. That is why the Prophet let his wife to replace the broken dish by another sound one to make up for what she did. Furthermore, we can conclude that Husband must always be firm when something happens relate to others right. This is shown by giving the right back to who deserves it.



D) Immediate action is needed to solve problems:

It is very important to solve problems while it is in the very beginning otherwise it will grow bigger and bigger and end up trying to solve the consequences of the problem rather than finding solutions to the problem itself.

That is why the prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) acted immediately on spot so that this issue ends there and not to be bigger. The steps that the prophet used shows, amazing wisdom, follow the steps:

1. Collecting the dish and the food

2. Explaining the reason of such behavior to calm everyone down

3. Commanding everyone to eat as nothing happened

4. Replaced the broken dish with another sound one


E) Appreciation to Allah's blessings

A husband is the leader of the house that is why he needs to be the example for his family. This example can be taught by behavior and character. Thus, a husband should teach his family to appreciate what Allah provides them. That is why the Prophet collected the food that fell on floor and let everyone eat it. This is a very good example to teach everyone in the family how to be more humble, more thankful to Allah's blessings.



Wallahu A'lam

Written by Ayman bin Khaled on the 15th of sha'ban 1428 H.

[Rabi'ya]

:sl:

sorry to break it to all you sisters out there but I have the best husband ever :) good luck finding second best ;) lol

[Sister Unknown]

:sl:

sorry to break it to all you sisters out there but I have the best husband ever :) good luck finding second best ;) lol

Sorry to kill it for you. We'll seee how long that lasts (smile). Life is a test. We are always tested as to how we will react.

[Rabi'ya]

Allah knows best what life will bring my way. Alhamdulillah can only say I am content.

[Sister Unknown]

Sorry. I was a bit rude.

All thanks belongs to Allah.

[nousername]

He must be religious and remember the sunnah but also lets not forget that being hott helps too!:nervous:

[Rabi'ya]

my advice is this. write your post. count to 10, re-read your post then if ur sure it will cause no offence then click 'reply'

i hold no grudges, but u can see the post was in jest. and was certainly not a serious post. apology accepted sis, all is forgiven. :)

[Sister Unknown]

Nousername, Lol, sis. I know I should ask this personally, but I may be wrong. Is your avatar a drawn photograph of a human (smile)?

[sabr*]

He must be religious and remember the sunnah but also lets not forget that being hott helps too!:nervous:

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

nonusername:

Alhamdulillah!

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:
1. the most important is to fulfill her Islamic rights over you, and these have preceded.

2. that really nice attitude some of you brothers put on when you go propose to your wives and their families <---that...that attitude, always keep up even after your marriage. dont bother putting this fake act on to please the girl and family and the second your nikah has been done, you take a turn for the worst. so no deception before and after marriage.

3. emotions. alot of brothers seem to think that women just need food a roof over her head. wrong, very wrong. joke around with your wives, spend time with her, take her out places, get her some roses and chocolates. tell her you love her, look after when she is sick. be creative in your ways of surprising her. at the same time, and for the general sake of your marriage, don't go into excess when spoiling her because it will get boring and you will find you have exhausted the means to make her happy <---things may go sour than. so yes, strike a balance. we don't expect to be spoiled 24/7 just something nice every now and again to know that you appreciate us. and don't, every spare second you have, go and see your family and friends...again strike a balance... and dont be one of those men who attend to the needs of the community whilst your own wife and kids need you more. alot of brothers do this where they don't care what the state of their family is in, but seem to be more than willing to help everyone and everywhere else.

and speaking of emotions, don't emotionally torture your wives. don't put unnecessary blame on them<---sometimes you're in the wrong as well. admit when you are wrong and apologize when you have wronged her. dont ever think this makes your manliness deficient, its silly.


4. be a man, but be a gentleman about it. let her argue and debate with you as long as it is light hearted (i,.e she isn't intending to be rude or offensive by it). be light hearted and dont over use your authrouity over her. dont be overally demanding and expect too much from her. don't humiliate her in front of others and "put her out there" (i.e when you arent a man enough to stand up for yourself and to others and yet treat her like garbage behind closed doors), only to expect her to stand by you.

5. housework and the likes. i put this seperatley because it needs it. help her with the house work and with the kids. something most important is that do the jobs that you should be doing already to lighten her burden. such as picking up your socks and putting them in the washing basket...put your cup in the sink when you have finished your tea or water and dont leave it on the coffee table. generally clean up after yourselves...she has already too much of other things to worry about such as dinner, looking after the kids, etc without that extra work that could and shouldn't have been done already.

5.your family and her. deal as justly as you can between them. respect her privacy and make sure this gets through to your families because too much gets out to too many people and no body bothers doing anything about it because it all about "pleasing the husband"

6. do you want to know what the key to a woman heart is? respect and love for her family, namely her parents. sure, you cant love anyone else's family like your own, but you can certainly still treat them with respect. if you dont like them, don't mention anything bad about them either, especially knowing that it will hurt her. take her to visit them and dont prevent this and what ever you do get that ignorant thinking out of your heads that your wives families are going to "overthrow" you and are competing with you :hmm:

[Rabi'ya]

:sl:

on a more serious note. Isnt each persons "ideal" different. I mean some people can tolerate things that others can't. And each persons personality is different and will "click" with different people in a different manner. Its very difficult to catagorise "ideal" when we are all so individual.

Alhamdulillah. if we all wanted the same thing, there'd be many more arguements over men than there are at the moment.

[Ğħαrєєвαħ]

MashaAllaah great thread. . . .

Geeky one at that too :D dont mind me im just passing by :)

[Rhubarb Tart]

He said: "The best among you is the one who is best to his wife" (Related by Ibn Hibban) in another version it is the one who is most kind to his wife. The Prophet himself was very gentle and kind in dealing with women.

The Prophet saws also said: "If any man shows patience with his wife's bad temper, Allah will give him a reward similar to the reward of Ayyub (Job) for his patience, and if any woman shows patience with her husband's bad temper, Allah will give her a reward similar to the reward of Asiyah daughter of Muzahim, the wife of Pharoah (Cf. Qur'an 66:11)."

It is reported that a man came to 'Umar ibn Al-Khattab raa to complain about his wife's ill-temper. While he was waiting for 'Umar to come out of his house, he heard 'Umar's wife scolding him and 'Umar quietly listening to her, and not answering her back. The man turned around and started walking away, muttering to himself: "If that is the case with 'Umar, the leader of the believers, who is famous for his uprighteness and toughness, then what about poor me?!" At that moment, 'Umar came out of his house and saw the man walking away. He called him and said, "What is it you want of me, O man?" The man replied: "O leader of the believers, I came to complain to you about my wife's bad-temper and how she nags me. Then I heard your wife doing the same to you, so I turned around, muttering to myself, 'If that is the situation of the leader of the believers, then what about me?'" 'Umar replied, "O my brother, I bear with her because of her rights over me. She cooks my food, bakes my bread, washes my clothes, breast-feeds my child...and yet none of these are her duty;* and then she is a comfort to my heart and keeps me away from forbidden deeds. Consequently, I bear with her." The man said, "It is the same with me, O leader of the believers." 'Umar said: "Then, O my brother, be patient with her, indeed this life is short. (Adh-Dhahabi, Al-Kabâ'ir 194)

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:
i should also add this as well. unfortunately it is in Arabic only. really good read though.

[Caller الداعي]

ideal muslim husband: 1.fulfills Allah's rights 2. fulfills family rights

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Surah An Nisa' 4:34


Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women on whose part you see ill*conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great. (Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan translation)

[Alpha Dude]

Sorry to kill it for you. We'll seee how long that lasts (smile). Life is a test. We are always tested as to how we will react.

What's wrong with you?

One of the most inane posts you've ever made. People like you, the way you behave currently, harm the faith of other believers yet probably walk about thinking they are such great muslims!

Evaluate yourself!

[Muslimeen]

:sl:

sorry to break it to all you sisters out there but I have the best husband ever :) good luck finding second best ;) lol

I hope you tell him that, many times we just hide things from the person who needs to hear it most.

[Rabi'ya]

I hope you tell him that, many times we just hide things from the person who needs to hear it most.

:sl:

Oh I do!! every day. Alhamdulillah I pray that other sisters can be a blessed as I have been with Such a patient and understandin husband inshAllah

[glo]

:sl:

sorry to break it to all you sisters out there but I have the best husband ever :) good luck finding second best ;) lol

Haha!
We can all stop looking then, eh??! :D

My husband and I have been together for 24 years, and over the years our love for each other has changed in quality and our marriage has grown stronger.
He is away for a week at the moment, at it feels very strange! We are so seldom apart ...

[Cabdullahi]

:sl:

Oh I do!! every day. Alhamdulillah I pray that other sisters can be a blessed as I have been with Such a patient and understandin husband inshAllah

sisters dont despair! there's a beacon of hope so long as ya'll become the masters of the kitchen cooking the great chicken there's hope :)

[~Raindrop~]

Surely you meant to write: 'cooking the great chicken in 50 different ways'?

:X

[Cabdullahi]

Surely you meant to write: 'cooking the great chicken in 50 different ways'?

:X

if they can get past defrosting fish fingers then its possible....if they can utilize ingredients like garam masala , chillies , lemon and yoghurt they can do it

[Sister Unknown]

What's wrong with you?

One of the most inane posts you've ever made. People like you, the way you behave currently, harm the faith of other believers yet probably walk about thinking they are such great muslims!

Evaluate yourself!

Akhi, I hope you are doing well (smile). I will not take anything personally you say, or have said, and your kind have said. Neither do I give a ripp. Let me make it clearer: Focus on yourself. As for your information, I do think and love my brothers and sisters, unlilke Sunni forum who love to backbite in the same manner of what you just accused me of. In fact, brother, I love the kawarijj, the Sufis, the Salafis, an dall other Muslims around the world. If you want to suspect negativelly about your sister, which is a sin, go ahead. I am satisfied with anybody who believes in Allah and His messanger, saw.

What a strange party... You're so quick to accuse me of something not even understanding the post........

[MysticRiver]

The ideal Muslim husband is the one in the middle of an argument, when wrong, he admits and says "sorry" and when right, he just keeps silent. ;D

[Sister Unknown]

Most of what you say here is irrelevant.

I DO understand what you meant. However, there is always a context for such 'advice' to be given and the manner in which you departed your 'wisdom' was in extremely poor taste. Hardly beneficial. If you can't say a good word, just be quiet.

You're one of our former members. You've had trouble in the past with saying foolish things. I'm hardly surprised by your posts. Please, just pull yourself together and learn some sense. THINK a million times before you say something.

What is it brother, eh? Are you trying to teach me ahlaq? Lol. You accuse me of saying foolish things and you are being foolosh yourself! Maybe you, before issuing fatwas to people next time, seriously, busy yourself learning your obligations. No offense, I willn ot mention the things I have told you about in the past. Now, since you are my brother in faith, I do apologize since my manners are bad. But to inform you, I do not feel superior to anybody. You do not know the reason I act the way I do, perhaps it is for Islamic reasons??????Maybe?????

I need to not justify a thing to you, or anybody else. However, I do not feel superior since I do believe that actions are apart of the faih ass well as hey, I may be in a worse situation than you and all the mankind when I stand before Allah on the judgement day.

Now, my last post to you. And, do not address me ever again, I warn you, you know I care less what others thing and if I get banned or not.


May Allah forvive us all.

[MysticRiver]

Sister unknown, anyone who posts in this forum has a huge responsibility built on respect for the other members. Your attitude is far from being so. What's the use of ruining the good 'mood' of a thread with your sardonic comments?

[Sister Unknown]

Sister unknown, anyone who posts in this forum has a huge responsibility built on respect for the other members. Your attitude is far from being so. What's the use of ruining the good 'mood' of a thread with your sardonic comments?

I did not begin. Sorry. Show respect to recieve it in return. Same goes for you. No offense intended. Since you do not want to continue ruining the thread, maybe stop making comments. I know I sound rigid, I hope he learned his lesson.

[Sister Unknown]

Original topic starter, I apologize he went off topic. Alpha Dude, use the PM next time. Please don't. It will be ignored. Focus on yourself. I am not trying to forbid evil, or whatever. Thamk you for your carring approach. And I do not blabbel when I write, remember this! The only reason I joined here is because I feel more confident asking some questions that are considered "unnecessary" elsewhere.

[Rhubarb Tart]

Back to topic


Husband that assist with children and household...

He appreciate the work done by his wife...

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

I am posting this with the best intention and hope that those reading put the best construction on it.

It appears some forum members (based on my review of their posts and threads) seem to feed on anything that can either ruin a thread, find an excuse to get off topic, or engage in quarrels. I ask anyone with the best intentions to delete any posts that contributed to senseless and unedifying communication. There is no need to defend a position. Just take positive action. Anyone with the best intentions can be duped into the quarrel trap.

Erase it and just replace it with Alhamdulillah!

Please carefully read the following Sahih hadith. Sukranallah!
__________________________________________________
Sahih Bukhari Volume 3, Book 43, Number 637:

Narrated 'Aisha:

The Prophet said, "The most hated person in the sight of Allah is the most quarrelsome person."
__________________________________________________

Sahih Bukhari Volume 8, Book 73, Number 42:

Narrated Jarir bin 'Abdullah:

The Prophet said, "He who is not merciful to others, will not be treated mercifully.
__________________________________________________

The Manners and Purification of the Soul section requires a revisit! Insha Allah

Jazakumullahu Khair

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

The ideal Muslim husband is the one in the middle of an argument, when wrong, he admits and says "sorry" and when right, he just keeps silent. ;D

agreed with that-well almost.

[Muslimeen]

The ideal Muslim husband is the one in the middle of an argument, when wrong, he admits and says "sorry" and when right, he just keeps silent. ;D

Very true, cos when he is right it is the beginning of the next argument.

[Muslimeen]

Back to topic


Husband that assist with children and household...

He appreciate the work done by his wife...

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,
he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

Reminds me of an old joke,

On the day of Qiyamah, the malaikah are busy sorting out who goes to jannah and who goes to jahannam.
Malaika: How many wives you have?
1st Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
2nd Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
3rd person: Two wives
Malaika: Put him into Jannah
Malaika: How many wives you have?
4th Person: Before I answer, I have noticed something strange, the first two guys who had only one wife you ordered them to be thrown into Jahannam, but the third man who had two wives you put him into Jannah, why is that?
Malaika: Please brother, please, try to understand, the man just came from Jahannam, how can I put him back there!!.;D

[glo]

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,
he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

Are you speaking from own experience there?

[Vigno]

Asalamu Alekum

The ideal muslim husband is one who fears Allah, that is the key that opens many good doors like faith and love. A muslim who fears Allah would never do something that Allah forbids or dislikes. So congratulations to muslim women who marry those who fear Allah, and that fear means real fear and not something said by the tongue, but fear felt deeply by the heart. That fear will make that husband treat the wife fairly and seek her happiness. May Allah grant us all this fear, ameen

Allah knows best

Asalamu Alekum

[Muslimeen]

Are you speaking from own experience there?

No, from other peoples experience, I have a decent boss, no kids, could'nt cook to save my life and a wife who loves me to bits, why? I really don't know.

[glo]

No, from other peoples experience, I have a decent boss, no kids, could'nt cook to save my life and a wife who loves me to bits, why? I really don't know.

That's beautiful! :statisfie

Isn't that the true miracle of love - being loved, even when we don't feel we have done anything to deserve it?
I am sure you feel the same way about your wife.

Praise God for his blessings.

[Muslimeen]

That's beautiful! :statisfie

Isn't that the true miracle of love - being loved, even when we don't feel we have done anything to deserve it?
I am sure you feel the same way about your wife.

Praise God for his blessings.

But I fear that I will never be able to give her the love she deserves. May allah not take me to task on the day of qiyamah, spare me for my weaknesses and raise my wife's position in Jannah to nothing less than Firdaus. Ameen.

This is the dua I make for my wife whenever I can. Many a man needs to wait until he is sick or on his dying bed to know how much he is loved or how loyal his wife is to him, allah has given me this privelege while I am still strong and healthy. If I was caught infront of a runaway train and my wife had the opportunity to save my life and sacrifice hers then without a shadow of doubt I can say there will absolutely no hesitation on her behalf. May allah give her the best of both worlds. Ameen.

[Salahudeen]

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation? :hmm:

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them? :hmm: buy them some chocolates?

[Soulja Girl]

:sl:

^He shouldn't complain, jus be happy & appreciate wah she does.. Well if she does the right things that is..

:wa:

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

So lets see,

He must go to work for atleast 8 hrs a day,
Stomach an arrogant and rude boss,
Come home to a nagging wife,
Kids who don't listen,
Help with their homework,
Assist with the housework,
Clean, wash, cook then,

she didnt say he has to help her out when he comes home from work...he can help her on weekends for eg :hmm:

if he did so willingly, then he probably wouldn't have to hear her "nagging." problem solved.

he must appreciate his wife. Nice!!
I like that.

dont we all.

Reminds me of an old joke,

On the day of Qiyamah, the malaikah are busy sorting out who goes to jannah and who goes to jahannam.
Malaika: How many wives you have?
1st Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
2nd Person: One wife
Malaika: Throw him into hell
Malaika: How many wives you have?
3rd person: Two wives
Malaika: Put him into Jannah
Malaika: How many wives you have?
4th Person: Before I answer, I have noticed something strange, the first two guys who had only one wife you ordered them to be thrown into Jahannam, but the third man who had two wives you put him into Jannah, why is that?
Malaika: Please brother, please, try to understand, the man just came from Jahannam, how can I put him back there!!.;D

i forgot to laugh. common sense dictates that you you have such a big problem with something, then you remove yourself away from it. so if you think women are such a pain and are nags, etc then you shouldn't marry them. the jokes on you.

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation? :hmm:

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them? :hmm: buy them some chocolates?

you don't have to say it directly, you could show your appreciation to someone in other ways, like you sad buying her chocolates and other nice gifts. also writing a poem to her, telling her how nice her food is, how well she cleans the house, what a funny person she is... how much you are thankful for how she supports you...how good looking and cute your kids and have taken her genes. make nice comment about her good characteristics.

appreciation can be in words or actions. it can be preventing her from doing something harmful to herself doing. in short, appreciation is saying and doing things she likes to her and see from you. if she likes you to pray tahjjud, for example then you should do that because that's what she likes.

[Muslimeen]

:sl:
i forgot to laugh. common sense dictates that you you have such a big problem with something, then you remove yourself away from it. so if you think women are such a pain and are nags, etc then you shouldn't marry them. the jokes on you.

Do we have to be so serious about everything in life? what happened to good ol sense of humour?? :grumbling

[Ummu Sufyaan]

^between that poem and your comments above it, it didn't seem like a joke.

[aadil77]

Can Bro Alpha Dude and Sister Unknown speak to each other and give any naseeha in private rather than in the open infront of everyone?

That would be a start

[Muslimeen]

^between that poem and your comments above it, it didn't seem like a joke.

I have strange sense of humour, my wife really knows about that, but can't expect everyone else to know that. Sometimes you get poked with a joke. I have been all too familiar with that situation so your replies are not at all alarming.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

^so? thats not what was being addressed.

[marwen]

ok guys I'm waiting for good characteristics of the Ideal Husband, so may be I try to apply them in the future :b. But I see that the thread become a "fight club" :^0 :D
and I don't think this will help answer the question of the OP.

[Alpha Dude]

Can Bro Alpha Dude and Sister Unknown speak to each other and give any naseeha in private rather than in the open infront of everyone?

Don't worry it's ended. Up to mods if they want to delete remove posts.

[Alpha Dude]

lol, you could have sent us that naseeha in a PM.. ;)

[marwen]

^ lol why don't we use the PM instead of the forum lol : You wanna post a thread, you pm it to all the members ;D
Just Kidding guys don't hate me :D

[aadil77]

lol, you could have sent us that naseeha in a PM.. ;)

.........doh!

[Muslimeen]

^so? thats not what was being addressed.

So what is being addressed?? I am a little confused :confused:

[Ğħαrєєвαħ]

Aslaamu`Alaaykum
Okay back on topic :-\

An Ideal Husband should be geeky :-\ (j/k)

They should be happy and smile and be calm no matter what and not argue with his wife that would be an awesome characteristic. According to some the wife always wins anyway :-\ They should be able to try and be like the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) in some way by following the Sunnah of Rasoolallah. However, nobody is as perfect as the Prophet

They should be able to help the wife out in all situations and ofcourse Vice versa! Fearing Allaah and practising and if a harship or calamity enters their life they should deal with it patiently, and not swear get angry n esp Aggressive (like the Prophet Sallahu alaayhi wa salam) and other geeky stuff ofcourse the bad geeky as theirs a good geeky also :-\ for those geeky brothers and sistahs who were not aware of this :-\

If they commit a sin they should able to know what to do which is asking Allaah for forgiveness and do all they can do please Allaah to the best of their Ability and we are all Humans as some are guided by Allaah and for some its unfortunate

Anyways i was just saying what i think just my geekified geeky nerdy view , you dont have to agree and please dont become angry with me if so il delete this post inshaAllaah anyways im sure many other great characteristics have been mentioned so i dont need to say no more indeed

*walks off*

Wa`Alaaykum Salaam

[Asiyah3]

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation? :hmm:

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them? :hmm: buy them some chocolates?

Don't complain, don't be ungrateful. Appreciate her & don't take what she does for granted. A gift would be lovely now and then.

[~Raindrop~]

An ideal husband would be one who understands his wife's need to eat chocolate at the time of any crisis...before thinking of a solution.

[glo]

An ideal husband would be one who understands his wife's need to eat chocolate at the time of any crisis...before thinking of a solution.

That should definitely be in every wedding contract! :D

[Rhubarb Tart]

There was me trying to get back on topic and I nearly get my head chopped off! lol!

When I mean assist the housework, I mean clean after himself like put his boxers in washing basket, clean the table after he eats etc. Not always expecting a cup of tea made by the wife, but tries and makes his tea now and then. Also assist her more when she is pregnant or the child is still young and handful. I know this may seem common sense to people but to others it may not be especially if their mother were doing everything for them.

Of course this goes both gender but since this topic is on the husband, i keep talking about the husband.

[Asiyah3]

When I mean assist the housework, I mean clean after himself like put his boxers in washing basket, clean the table after he eats etc. Not always expecting a cup of tea made by the wife, but tries and makes his tea now and then. Also assist her more when she is pregnant or the child is still young and handful. I know this may seem common sense to people but to others it may not be especially if their mother were doing everything for them.

You're right sister. I agree with your description. A man should be to a certain level independent and not some mommy's boy.

[Cabdullahi]

There was me trying to get back on topic and I nearly get my head chopped off! lol!

When I mean assist the housework, I mean clean after himself like put his boxers in washing basket, clean the table after he eats etc. Not always expecting a cup of tea made by the wife, but tries and makes his tea now and then. Also assist her more when she is pregnant or the child is still young and handful. I know this may seem common sense to people but to others it may not be especially if their mother were doing everything for them.

Of course this goes both gender but since this topic is on the husband, i keep talking about the husband.

what kind of man would not do the above things....those are the basics shizzle!

[Rhubarb Tart]

what kind of man would not do the above things....those are the basics shizzle!

Yeah of course, there are but the ideal husband would do the basic things right...

Why not include it.

[Rhubarb Tart]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Surah An Nisa' 4:34


Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women on whose part you see ill*conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great. (Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan translation)

Salam

That part can also be translated into "went away"?

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

sweet106:

You bolded that part of the ayat.

Sahih Bukhari Volume 8, Book 73, Number 68:

Narrated 'Abdullah bin Zam'a:

The Prophet forbade laughing at a person who passes wind, and said, "How does anyone of you beat his wife as he beats the stallion camel and then he may embrace (sleep with) her?" And Hisham said, "As he beats his slave"

[Ummu Sufyaan]

:sl:

An ideal husband would be one who understands his wife's need to eat chocolate at the time of any crisis...before thinking of a solution.

either that, or the need to bite his head off before thinking of a solution :shade:

[Cabdullahi]

:sl:


either that, or the need to bite his head off before thinking of a solution :shade:

Inalillahi wa ina ilayhi raji3oon

absolutely shocking :'(

[Muslimeen]

Inalillahi wa ina ilayhi raji3oon

absolutely shocking :'(

Sabr brother, Sabr, allah loves those who are patient and they ask, why do men get Hur al een in jannah?? Ok, it's time hide :hiding:

[Ummu Sufyaan]

edit.........

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Sahih Bukhari Volume 4, Book 55, Number 548:

Narrated Abu Huraira:

Allah 's Apostle said, "Treat women nicely, for a women are created from a rib, and the most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion, so, if you should try to straighten it, it will break, but if you leave it as it is, it will remain crooked. So treat women nicely."

[Ğħαrєєвαħ]

^Masha`Allaah indeed!

[sabr*]

Surah Baqarah 2:228

228. And divorced women shall wait (as regards their marriage) for three menstrual periods, and it is not lawful for them to conceal what Allâh has created in their wombs, if they believe in Allâh and the Last Day. And their husbands have the better right to take them back in that period, if they wish for reconciliation. And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses, etc.) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect, etc.) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allâh is All-Mighty, All-Wise.

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Surah An Nisa 4:19

19. O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will, and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr you have given them, unless they commit open illegal sexual intercourse. And live with them honourably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good.
(Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan translation)

[Neelofar]

Salaamz! :D

Awww all these posts are making me wanna get married now! :embarrass imsad

[Asiyah3]

Salaamz! :D

Awww all these posts are making me wanna get married now! :embarrass imsad

:wa:
It's "ideal", not real. ^^

[Cabdullahi]

:wa:
It's "ideal", not real. ^^

it can be real!!

[Asiyah3]

it can be real!!

Insha'Allah. Allah blesses whom wills.

[S_87]

how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation?

its both...............

like complimenting food she cooks/ if she dressed up, for u to notice, how she keeps home clean etc...just a few small words can mean alot n melt a heart

[sabr*]

:wa:
It's "ideal", not real. ^^

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

**muslimah**:

Hopefully you can only speak on your own behalf. You have no idea what is going on in the households of Millions of Muslims worldwide.

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

When your outlook on life in general is confronted with never ending obstacles you don't realize you are the cause and your mind continues to create these false barriers. The type of person no one desires to share the same space.

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Wrong Concept of an Ideal Husband

A look at the matrimonial section of an Islamic magazine will quickly demonstrate that many Muslim men and women do not know what an ideal Muslim husband is. Muslim men looking for wives advertise themselves as doctors, engineers, and financially secure. Muslim women appear to be on the lookout for an established professional or more likely a handsome MD. Rarely do Muslim men and women even mention character, religious convictions, and attitudes as a priority. At most, they might be mentioned as a sidebar. It seems that many of us believe that a man is an ideal Muslim husband if he is handsome, makes a lot of money, and comes from an influential family. And the divorce rate among Muslims continues to rise.

Standard of Judging an Ideal Husband

As Muslims, we must base our judgment on what makes an ideal Muslim husband on the guidance of Allah () and the example of Prophet Muhammad (SAWS), not on the standards of a TV sitcom, the culture in which we were born, or our own materialistic mentality.

source: http://www.soundvision.com/Info/Isla...iage.ideal.asp

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

What is your view of an Ideal Muslim husband?

[tigerkhan]

Prophet PBUH...a model for ideal husband.

[qurantour.com]

Alhumdollilah Good Answer

[Ranya]

My ideal husband has a strong deen, is able to help me in my Islamic practice, is willing to accept my strengths and weaknesses, is kind, good-tempered, has sense of humor, and likes reading books. It doesn't seem to me to be asking much. :><:

[AslamP]

Is the ideal Muslim husband a medical doctor, an engineer, multi-millionaire.
Money brings conveniences and comfort in life, but it definitely should not be a requirement in finding a husband from the list above. Although, yes, he should have a secure job since women go through so many domestic rituals in a marriage; to expect them to also work is too much. If they want to work, of course, that's their choice.

Is the ideal Muslim husband humble, gentle, kind, considerate, caring, loving, open to good advice, willing to cooperate with others in the family rather than dictate rules, helpful in the house, involved in raising the children, and never abusive either physically or mentally.

Yes, that is the ideal husband and I'm happy to say the majority of the men in my family are what you have listed. I hope other men realize how important it is to be good maintainers!

Use the Quran and Sunnah to show what you think is the ideal Muslim Husband. Insha Allah

The best example I can give you from Hadiths and the Quran, Prophet Muhammad, Hazrat Musa, Hazrat Yusuf, Hazrat Ayub, Hazrat Lut!
This thread was created with the best intentions. Any positive feedback would be appreciated and encouraged.

Great question!:statisfie

[sabr*]

My ideal husband has a strong deen, is able to help me in my Islamic practice, is willing to accept my strengths and weaknesses, is kind, good-tempered, has sense of humor, and likes reading books. It doesn't seem to me to be asking much. :><:

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ukhti Ranya:

that is ideal but the cultural element is very important in your husband succumbing to traditional male chauvinist views which isn't the Sunna. The practice of culture replaces the application of Islam. I agree that the qualities you listed should be the criteria for an Ideal husband. Applying the Sunna doesn't mean a person abandons the good qualities Allah has blessed them with.

Everyone is different. There are no clones.

Good post!

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Jazakumullahu Khair for the positive contributions to the thread!

[S.Belle]

this is a great thread mashallah
here are some points in an article that are important to point out
the full article is here http://www.missionislam.com/family/husband.htm

His first duty is maintenance and protection, and overall responsibility for the welfare of his wife, which is prescribed in the Qur’an:

"Men shall take full care of women with the bounties which Allah has bestowed more abundantly on the former than on the latter, and with what they may spend out of their possessions....".
[Qur’an 4:34]

This includes feeding, clothing and shelter for the wife and for any children of the marriage. This is a legally enforceable duty, which remains even after divorce until the expiry of the Iddah or even longer in the view of some of the scholars. Financial responsibility for the family therefore rests squarely on the husband, and the wife has no duty to contribute to family expenses unless she has the means and the wish to do so.
The legal obligations of a husband do not stop with provision of the basic requirements relating to maintenance and protection. He is also expected to give her company and marital relations, and to avoid doing anything that would harm her.
These obligations are enforced by the Shari’ah. If a man fails to maintain his wife or fails to visit her for more than a certain period of time, the wife has grounds to be granted a divorce by a Shari’ah Court. Similarly, if she can prove to the court that the husband is doing harm (Idrar), be it by drinking alcohol, or beating her without lawful cause, or abusing her or her parents and so on, she is entitled to be granted a divorce. In none of these cases can the husband claim back any part of the dowry or presents he has given to the wife. I would like to make a note here that every situation has to be evaluated on its merits and circumstances by a Shar'iah Court. These points mentioned above are general precepts in the Shar'iah.
The Husband is however urged in the Qur’an to avoid divorce and try to preserve marriage even if it is not ideal. This is to be done in the first instance by exercising patience with his wife’s faults. The Qur’an say’s;

"Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike a thing while Allah brings about through it a great deal of good."
[Qur’an 4:19]

The Prophet (saws) also emphasised the undesirability of divorce in a Hadith found in Abu Dau’d’s collection:
"The most hateful of all lawful things, in the sight of Allah, is divorce."
The ideal husband should therefore, if need arises, make full use of Qur’anic provisions for reconciliation and arbitration [Qur’an 4:34] before proceeding with divorce


Lastly, I approached the question "What is an ideal Muslim husband" by asking Muslim women to tell me what they thought.
To this end a questionnaire was passed to a random group of Muslim women, who informed me what they considered the most desirable qualities for an ideal Muslim husband to be.
To this end, a random group of 35 Muslim women living locally, mainly married ones were selected.
The five most important qualities scored 2 points each and the five next most important qualities scored 1 point each. The result is shown below:

Women’s Order of Priority in the Desirable Qualities of an Ideal Muslim Husband

Points
1st. A Pious Muslim 49
2nd. Truthfulness and honesty 47
3rd A good leader 40
4th Justice and fairness 38
5th Love of children 37
6th Kindness and consideration 31
7th Readiness to consult his wife 30
8th Good manners 29
9th Chastity and good morals 26
10th Trustworthiness and reliability 25
11th Avoids quarrelling and beating 22
12th Clean habits 20
13th Strength of mind and will 19
14th Gentleness 17
15th Generosity 14
16th A loving nature 16
17th Ability to be contented with one wife 15
18th Sense of humour 13
19th Reasonableness 11
20th Firmness 9
21st Intelligence 8
22nd Seriousness 7
23rd Good looks 6
24th Physical strength 4
25th Wealth 1

[Banu_Hashim]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

What is your view of an Ideal Muslim husband?

Ahhh, your signature makes me itchy!!



These replies have been brilliant and so insightful! JazaakamuAllaahu Khayran!

[Ummu Sufyaan]

What is the ideal Muslim husband?

dont be a Nazi.

if you dont want your wife to study, educate her
if you dont want your wife to drive, take her places
if you dont want your wife to see friends, talk to her. make sure that your wife has company, otherwise dont complain when she talks too much.
if you dont want to pay for her food/essentials, let her go out and buy her own food/essentials


if you forbid anything from your wife unjustfully, dont forbid your wife from going out and seeking her own means. if you had an animal, and you didn't feed it, etc would you be cruel as to not even let it attain its own means of living/survival.<---if you cant do that to an animal, then a human being takes more priority.

[Ghazalah]

17th Ability to be contented with one wife

Ditto. And a family guy :D

[sabr*]

dont be a Nazi? (Are you ok?)

if you dont want your wife to study, educate her
if you dont want your wife to drive, take her places
if you dont want your wife to see friends, talk to her. make sure that your wife has company, otherwise dont complain when she talks too much.
if you dont want to pay for her food/essentials, let her go out and buy her own food/essentials


if you forbid anything from your wife unjustfully, dont forbid your wife from going out and seeking her own means. if you had an animal, and you didn't feed it, etc would you be cruel as to not even let it attain its own means of living/survival.<---if you cant do that to an animal, then a human being takes more priority.

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ummu Sufyaan

The question of What is the ideal Muslim husband promoting your unrelated response reveals other issues that can not be resolved via the Islamic board. Go visit your local Masjid and consult the Imam.

We promote the rights Allah has given women. We are not oppressive in any of our threads towards women. We speak against cultural and tribal habits disguised as Islam and accept the usual backlash.

This thread was created with the best intentions and hope that all positive replies will enhance the thread and not disrupt it with off the wall posts that incites negative responses.

Sahih Bukkari Volume 4, Book 55, Number 548:

Narrated Abu Huraira:

Allah 's Apostle said, "Treat women nicely, for a women is created from a rib, and the most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion, so, if you should try to straighten it, it will break, but if you leave it as it is, it will remain crooked. So treat women nicely."

[Ummu Sufyaan]

wa alaykum us-Salaam
it was a figure a speech, implying that one (a husband) shouldn't be oppressive.

[TerrorStillAliv]

Obiously Afghan and Saudi men are the perfection

[Ummu Sufyaan]

^meaning?
.....

[Banu_Hashim]

Obiously Afghan and Saudi men are the perfection

Is it their cool head and calm disposition?? I knew it.

[sabr*]

As-Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

I guess we missed the joke thread. It only takes a few to disrupt a positive thread submitted with the best intentions.


Fatir (The Originator of Creation) 35:6

إِنَّ الشَّيْطَانَ لَكُمْ عَدُوٌّ فَاتَّخِذُوهُ عَدُوًّا إِنَّمَا يَدْعُو حِزْبَهُ لِيَكُونُوا مِنْ أَصْحَابِ السَّعِيرِ (35:6)

Inna alshshaytana lakum AAaduwwun faittakhithoohu AAaduwwan innama yadAAoo hizbahu liyakoonoo min ashabi alssaAAeeri</B>

35:6 (Y. Ali) Verily Satan is an enemy to you: so treat him as an enemy. He only invites his adherents, that they may become Companions of the Blazing Fire.

Jazakumullahu Khair

[sabr*]

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):


Being the best ideal Muslim husband is like anything else it requires work and regular maintenance.


If a person has a automobile and neglects it she can expect it to breakdown.

The ideal Muslim husband acknowledges they are not perfect and it requires a constant refinement
to be the best person he can be.


If many Muslims omit the cultural and tribal brainwashing and indoctrination Islam will be the only principals
left to implement.


Jazakumullahu Khair


This post was submitted with the best intentions and the best construction should be used when reading it.

[ProudMuslimSis]

(2) "Mahr "

The wife is entitled to a marriage gift that is her own. This may be prompt or deferred depending on the agreement between the parties. A marriage is not valid without mahr. It does not have to be money or gold. It can be non-material like teaching her to read the Qur'an. " Mahr" is a gift from the groom to the bride. This is the Islamic law, unlike some cultures whereby the brides parents pay the future husband to marry the daughter. This practice degrades women and is contrary to the spirit of Islam. There is no specification in the Qur'an as to what or how much the Mahr has to be. It depends on the parties involved.

This is to protect the wife and children in case the marriage does not last, correct?

[sabr*]

This is to protect the wife and children in case the marriage does not last, correct?

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ukhti ProudMuslimSis:

the following is an explanation of Mahr and also a link detailing it in-depth. Hope this provides the information
you seek. Insha Allah


What is the Mahr?

The mahr is a compulsory part of an Islamic marriage contract. The other words for mahr generally used in the Qur'an are sadaqah and ajr, meaning reward or gift to the bride in which there is profit but no loss, and faridah, literally that which has been made obligatory, or an appointed portion. Allah commanded: 'Give women their faridah as a free gift.' (4:4) (Unfortunately the word is frequently incorrectly translated as 'dowry).

It is a gift of money, possessions or property made by the husband to the wife, which becomes her exclusive property. It is an admission of her independence, for she becomes the owner of the money or property immediately, even though she may have owned nothing before. It has nothing to do with either of their parents, except that a husband might need to take a loan. This should only be done with the intention of repayment. It is also intended as a token of the husband's willing acceptance of the responsibility of bearing all the necessary expenses of his wife.

Even if the wife owned no property or money of her own before her marriage, she is given this money or property when she marries so that she commences her married life in her new status with money or property of her own. The wife gives herself and her services to her husband, and in return he gives her property to own herself, even if she had nothing before, and pledges that he will maintain her. Muslim women are placed in charge of the internal arrangement of the household, while Muslim men are responsible for its financing (even if the wife earns her own money subsequent to her marriage).

The Prophet gave each of his wives a payment of mahr, ranging from token sums, the granting of freedom from slavery when being made a wife, to the payment of 400-500 dirhams. His wife Umm Habibah's mahr consisted of 4000 dirhams, this sum having been fixed by Najashi, the Negus (a Christian ruler) of Abyssinia. (Abu Dawud, Kitab an-Nikah, 2:235).

There was in fact no fixed upper limit for mahr. Allah required the provision to depend upon the circumstances of the husband:

'…the wealthy according to his means, and the straitened in circumstances according to his means. The gift of a reasonable amount is necessary from those who wish to act in the right way.' (2:236).

In a famous case, the second Caliph, Umar b. al-Khattab, once gave a public sermon in which he asked the congregation to refrain from fixing heavy mahrs, and stated that the Prophet had declared no-one should give more than 400 dirhams. A woman immediately stood up and challenged him, quoting the verse 4:20 from the Qur'an: 'But if you decide to take a wife in place of another, even if you had given the first a heap of gold (quintar) for a dowry, you shall not take the least bit back.' Umar went back to the minbar and withdrew his words stating 'the woman is right, and Umar is wrong. Whoever wishes may give as much property as he wishes to give.' (Ibn Hajar al-Athqalani, Fath al-Bari, 9:167).

source: http://www.islamfortoday.com/ruqaiyyah07.htm

[CosmicPathos]

I think it is not wise to start attacking people's cultures and values in disguise of Islamic puritanism. Culture is an inherent part of one's humanity. Allah swt has acknowledged this by saying in Quran that he created people in different groups. Culture is one part of what makes us different. No culture is immoral, it is people's actions that are immoral. So to go on a rampage on criticizing people's cultures and identities does not have any hikma in it, it only makes people angry and away from Islam. I have seen all over the internet on Islamic websites "desi culture is worst culture," or "arab culture is trash" or "immigrants parents should not bring their culture baggage (I heard Yes-Sir Qadhi say this!), this is pure non-sense.

I hope my point was clear.

best.

[sabr*]

I think it is not wise to start attacking people's cultures and values in disguise of Islamic puritanism. Culture is an inherent part of one's humanity. Allah swt has acknowledged this by saying in Quran that he created people in different groups. Culture is one part of what makes us different. No culture is immoral, it is people's actions that are immoral. So to go on a rampage on criticizing people's cultures and identities does not have any hikma in it, it only makes people angry and away from Islam. I have seen all over the internet on Islamic websites "desi culture is worst culture," or "arab culture is trash" or "immigrants parents should not bring their culture baggage (I heard Yes-Sir Qadhi say this!), this is pure non-sense.

I hope my point was clear.

best.

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Akhi mad_scientist:

When cultural and tribal biases prevent the implementation and application of the Quran and Sunnah it
becomes a major problem. Which is what we address and refer.

Nationalism is a disease in the Ummah.

Reread several times the following ayah.
________________________________________________


Al-An'am (The Cattle) 6:159

إِنَّ الَّذِينَ فَرَّقُواْ دِينَهُمْ وَكَانُواْ شِيَعًا لَّسْتَ مِنْهُمْ فِي شَيْءٍ إِنَّمَا أَمْرُهُمْ إِلَى اللّهِ ثُمَّ يُنَبِّئُهُم بِمَا كَانُواْ يَفْعَلُونَ (6:159)

Inna allatheena farraqoo deenahum wakanoo shiyaAAan lasta minhum fee shayin innama amruhum ila Allahi thumma yunabbiohum bima kanoo yafAAaloona

6:159 (Y. Ali) As for those who divide their religion and break up into sects, thou hast no part in them in the least: their affair is with Allah. He will in the end tell them the truth of all that they did.

________________________________________________

Ar-Rum (The Romans) 30:22

وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ خَلْقُ السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضِ وَاخْتِلَافُ أَلْسِنَتِكُمْ وَأَلْوَانِكُمْ إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّلْعَالِمِينَ (30:22)

Wamin ayatihi khalqu alssamawati waalardi waikhtilafu alsinatikum waalwanikum inna fee thalika laayatin lilAAalimeena

30:22 (Y. Ali) And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the variations in your languages and your colours: verily in that are Signs for those who know.
________________________________________________

Al-Hujurat (The Dwellings) 49:13

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ إِنَّا خَلَقْنَاكُم مِّن ذَكَرٍ وَأُنثَى وَجَعَلْنَاكُمْ شُعُوبًا وَقَبَائِلَ لِتَعَارَفُوا إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِندَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ (49:13)

Ya ayyuha alnnasu inna khalaqnakum min thakarin waontha wajaAAalnakum shuAAooban waqabaila litaAAarafoo inna akramakum AAinda Allahi atqakum inna Allaha AAaleemun khabeerun

49:13 (Y. Ali) O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise (each other). Verily the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you. And Allah has full knowledge and is well acquainted (with all things).


Jazakumullahu Khair

[kingkong]

This "ideal husband" thread is now 8 pages long. Yet I don't see an "ideal wife" thread opened. A reflection of how picky women are as a posed to men?

[LauraS]

This "ideal husband" thread is now 8 pages long. Yet I don't see an "ideal wife" thread opened. A reflection of how picky women are as a posed to men?

This thread was started by a man and half the posts are from men...also I'm sure there's an ideal wife thread somewhere, I remember reading it. :/

A man who is kind and has a sense of humour and adventure is good enough for me. :)

I can't speak for Islamic marriages obviously but from the impression I get reading this thread, your wife has a mind too. Don't just think of her as a pet to be kept happy. Some of these quotes talk about women's jealousies and faults, that they must be treated with patience but men are sometimes in the wrong too. I've mentioned this just on another thread, we're women not children. :) I don't mean this to spark an argument, it's just the impression that gets created by some of these quotes even if they have the best of intentions.

[sabr*]

This thread was started by a man and half the posts are from men...also I'm sure there's an ideal wife thread somewhere, I remember reading it. :/

A man who is kind and has a sense of humour and adventure is good enough for me. :)

I can't speak for Islamic marriages obviously but from the impression I get reading this thread, your wife has a mind too. Don't just think of her as a pet to be kept happy. Some of these quotes talk about women's jealousies and faults, that they must be treated with patience but men are sometimes in the wrong too. I've mentioned this just on another thread, we're women not children. :) I don't mean this to spark an argument, it's just the impression that gets created by some of these quotes even if they have the best of intentions.

Peace be to you LauraS:

it was unfortunate to review your response that this thread being started by a man and the majority of the responses
being by men some how compromised the integrity of the thread and content.

The truth and a quality of a thread or post shouldn't be determined by gender but merit and truth.

If you feel that the women are under represented then start private messaging and ask the women why.
This thread or the contents may not interest everyone.

Review our threads. We highlight the rights that the one and only creator of all existence have granted women.
The thread of what is an Ideal Muslim Women didn't receive the same response as this thread that encouraged
you to contribute.

We extend the best to you in your spiritual journey and quest for knowledge and truth.

Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

[LauraS]

Peace be to you LauraS:

it was unfortunate to review your response that this thread being started by a man and the majority of the responses
being by men some how compromised the integrity of the thread and content.

The truth and a quality of a thread or post shouldn't be determined by gender but merit and truth.

If you feel that the women are under represented then start private messaging and ask the women why.
This thread or the contents may not interest everyone.

Review our threads. We highlight the rights that the one and only creator of all existence have granted women.
The thread of what is an Ideal Muslim Women didn't receive the same response as this thread that encouraged
you to contribute.

We extend the best to you in your spiritual journey and quest for knowledge and truth.

Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

Hello, I was responding to the poster king kong who said that there were no threads about the ideal wife so women we being too picky.

[Cabdullahi]

i've learned that if you aint cute, they'll always see you as a mule

[sabr*]

i've learned that if you aint cute, they'll always see you as a mule

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Akhi thequietone:

being cute is subjective and based upon cultural likes and dislikes.

A heavyset person man or woman in certain parts of the world could be considered the best mate
because they are thought of culturally as well feed, good provider, etc.

In other parts of the world being heavyset is considered unhealthy with future health
issues to follow like diabetes, heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, cancer, gallbladder disease,
breathing issues (asthma, sleep apnea, etc)

Culture plays a key role in the way people view beauty. Everyone doesn't view Queen Rania,
Asma al-Assad, Aicha Gathafi, Megawati Sukarnoputri, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, Megan Fox,
Kim Kardashian, Jessica Alba or Holly Berry (Wait) as beautiful.

So that is why it is important to have strong Iman and Taqwa.

We perform du'a that Allah blesses us with a spouse with Taqwa, Iman, Good Character and least of all
a good appearance. We like a healthy combination of good qualities in a potential spouse.

Sahih Bukhari Volume 7, Book 62, Number 27:

Narrated Abu Huraira:

The Prophet said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a losers.

[Who Am I?]

Right, well not having read through the other 7 pages of this thread, I thought I would jump in anyway. I hope the landing isn't too rough...

Anyway, I'm not sure there is any one answer to this question. I used to really wonder about what women wanted, and I tried to figure it out so that I could be "that guy". Well, in so doing, I wasn't really being true to myself, first of all, and second, there is no one "perfect man" out there. Everyone is different, and everyone has different tastes. What one woman likes another may not like. That is something I've had to learn the hard way over the years.

Not pertaining to Islam I know, but then I don't have enough experience or knowledge on that subject. Just general advice as one man to another.

That's my contribution to the thread. Take it for what it's worth.

[إحسان]

Personally, I'd love my husband to a Muslim man who fears Allah, respects and is kind to others and thoughtful. InshAllah... I mean if someone fears Allah, then he'd won't hesitate to repent and Allah loves repentance.

[sabr*]

Personally, I'd love my husband to a Muslim man who fears Allah, respects and is kind to others and thoughtful. InshAllah... I mean if someone fears Allah, then he'd won't hesitate to repent and Allah loves repentance.

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Ukhti *dua:

Having the capacity to apply tauba (repentance) is a good quality to seek in a future husband. We perform du'a that
you are united with that mate. Insha Allah

[ardianto]

I've seen quite a few posts saying a good husband is the one who shows his appreciation to his wife, how do women like to be shown appreciation? lol is it simply telling them "I appreciate what you do" or does it involve buying them something to show your appreciation? :hmm:

We must appreciate our wives with the right words, in the right way, and in the right time. Appreciate them with the wrong words, in the wrong way and the wrong time will not makes any sense.

You can learn how to appreciate your wife after you have married and after you begin to understand her. Every woman has her own unique and difference. So, you cannot imitate how other husbands appreciate their wives. Also, if you imitate other husbands in giving appreciation to their wife, it will makes you look like a someone else. Women are happy if their spouses turn into better persons, but they will not happy if their spouses turn into different persons.

I've noticed this in women some of the time, they say men don't appreciate them, so how should a man show his appreciation to them? :hmm: buy them some chocolates?

A man's common mistake. They bring a gift to the home, give it to their wives while say "I love you", but then they sit in the sofa, read newspaper and let their wives stand alone. Women do not impressed to the gifts, but they are impressed to the attention of men who give them gifts.

Okay bro, if you want to be a good husband who can appreciate your wife in the future, your first step is learn how to be a good listener.

[sabr*]

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Akhi ardianto:

The guidance you provided is often neglected.

The practice of misogyny is a learnt behaviour.

Women are effected by it so much that they actually enable and support it.

Very strange.

[flowergarden]

wa alikum asalaam,
I believe my ideal of a husband is a man who will sit and listen to me when I am sad, a man who will be patient with me as I will be with him, a man who will accept me as I will accept him for all, a man who has the same morals as I do. I want a husband who is educated, as I am as well. I want a muslim man who has a kind heart and morals...
I believe finding a spouse is about looking for someone who is like you. :)

[Silver Pearl]

What is the ideal Muslim husband?

One who does what he is told! <_<

[Banu_Hashim]

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she will take it anyway.

[Souljette]

Asalamualaykum,
A very interesting topic and mashallah i liked the sources and as well as witnessing the love of brothers and sisters appreciating their wives and husbands mashallah.. I do pray that I be taht wife who can keep her husband and satisfied so that he makes dua for me just like bro Muslimeen does for his wife mashallah.. I would definitely want a husband who fears Allah and does everything for the sake of Allah (Subhaana wa taala).. Who hears and obeys the laws of Allah. That when he finds out something in the Qur'an and Sunnah he strives to apply it in his life, Someone who despite what society says, only does what Allah has ordered. Who is kind as well as strongheaded, Who loves Allah more than me but loves me for His sake. Who listens to me and discusses things with me. Who teaches me as well as encourages me. Who would feel for the Ummah as much as i feel for them. Someone who would push me to learn more and spread more about Islam.

Allah only knows what's best for me more than me.. I do pray that i do find the ideal husband Allah has chosen for me soon. Ameen

[Ğħαrєєвαħ]

One who does what he is told! <_<

I agree! ^o). . . . . . .

[ardianto]

One who does what he is told!

So, sisters, don't ever marry politicians.

[sabr*]

Allah only knows what's best for me more than me.. I do pray that i do find the ideal husband Allah has chosen for me soon. Ameen

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Uhkti Souljette:

Jazakumullahu Khair for your contribution to this positive thread. Our observation leads us to realize if a sister or brother spends
the majority of their time not engaging with their local Muslim community their opportunity and chances to secure a spouse with
Islamic values verses cultural and traditional ethnic habits decreases.

No one is perfect and everyone requires constant refinement. Many of us have pondered the thought of the what ifs when
following different online personalities. But the reality is that the majority of online personalities differ from real life.

We perform du'a that Allah blesses you with a husband that has Iman, Taqwa, Ihsan, and implements the Sunna absent of the
tribal and non Islamic influences. Insha Allah.

[sabr*]

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Tolerance :

Al-Hujurat (The Dwellings)

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ إِنَّا خَلَقْنَاكُم مِّن ذَكَرٍ وَأُنثَى وَجَعَلْنَاكُمْ شُعُوبًا وَقَبَائِلَ لِتَعَارَفُوا إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِندَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ (49:13)
Ya ayyuha alnnasu inna khalaqnakum min thakarin waontha wajaAAalnakum shuAAooban waqabaila litaAAarafoo
inna akramakum AAinda Allahi atqakum inna Allaha AAaleemun khabeerun


49:13 (Y. Ali) O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female,
and made you into nations and tribes, that ye may know each other (not that ye may despise (each other).
Verily the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you.
And Allah has full knowledge and is well acquainted (with all things).

[Jedi_Mindset]

The best husband is the one who has high imaan and following the sunnah, prays 5 times a day. having islamic knowledge. :) In my opinion.

From a men (lol)

Salaam

[ardianto]

The best husband is the one who has high imaan and following the sunnah, prays 5 times a day. having islamic knowledge. In my opinion.

From a men (lol)

Salaam

Religious level does not automatically makes a husband becomes good husband. There were some cases which the husbands were so busy with their ibadah and Islamic activities, but never gave attention to their wives, and treat their wives like strangers. Even I found a case which the husband too focus to ibadah and forgot to make money.

These cases considered as 'light cases'. The 'heavy cases' were happen in certain areas where misogyny is still strong. Maybe you have heard some cases which the husbands cut their wives' noses. Sadly, those husbands actually are religious Muslims.

[Jedi_Mindset]

A person who really follows the sunnah, and behold his nafs and anger. Has not problems with this, but i agree it's sad in what for state our ummah has become today.

[sabr*]

Religious level does not automatically makes a husband becomes good husband.
There were some cases which the husbands were so busy with their ibadah and Islamic activities, but never
gave attention to their wives, and treat their wives like strangers. Even I found a case which the husband too
focus to ibadah and forgot to make money.

These cases considered as 'light cases'. The 'heavy cases' were happen in certain areas where misogyny is still strong.
Maybe you have heard some cases which the husbands cut their wives' noses. Sadly, those husbands actually are religious Muslims.

As Salāmu `Alaykum (السلام عليكم):

Akhi ardianto:

the reality of a Muslims neglecting his family (Zawj-wife) is neglecting part of his din. (Way of life)

An-Nisa (The Women)

الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاء بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ
وَبِمَا أَنفَقُواْ مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِّلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللّهُ
وَاللاَّتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ
وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ فَإِنْ أَطَعْنَكُمْ فَلاَ تَبْغُواْ عَلَيْهِنَّ سَبِيلاً إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلِيًّا كَبِيرًا (4:34)
Alrrijalu qawwamoona AAala alnnisai bima faddala Allahu baAAdahum AAala baAAdin wabima
anfaqoo min amwalihim faalssalihatu qanitatun hafithatun lilghaybi bima hafitha Allahu
waallatee takhafoona nushoozahunna faAAithoohunna waohjuroohunna fee almadajiAAi
waidriboohunna fain ataAAnakum fala tabghoo AAalayhinna sabeelan inna Allaha kana
AAaliyyan kabeeran


4:34 (Y. Ali) Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the
one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means.
Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence
what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct,
admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly);
but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance):
For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).

[Hiraislam]

For remain ideal husband wife should also be an ideal one.

[ardianto]

:sl:

I have some friends who never miss salah, always fast in ramadan, often (but not always) perform sunnah fasting. And, they treat their wives well, so their wives are happy with them.

However, they are considered as "ordinary Muslims" because their Islamic knowledge just average, and they are not type of Muslims who like to say "in Islam...!, according to sunnah ...!"

My question, are they ideal Muslim husbands?

[Paprika]

**Spoken in mexican accent**

"The ideal husband is the one that can eat, eh many, many, papareeka's without his bald head getting all sweaty"

[Amat Allah]

There is no definite idea of the ideal Muslim husband; everyone will have his/ her match whom Allah made for him/her and people are not the same so, the Idea of the ideal Muslim husband or wife will be different from one to another; according to everyone's personality, traditions and customs, way of thinking, needs and others...

and at the end you will get what is written for ya only so, be pleased with whatever you get and thank Allah...

[UmmuShaheed]

Asalamu Alaikum,
An ideal husband is one who helps your iman increase, Prays and reads alongside with you
A man who apologizes Although hes right, doesnt get mad often And when he does he remains calm despite the situation , cleans without being asked to, Brings you Food knowing how much he enjoys having it brought to him, attempt to ensure your happy..
Loves, Cares, and Adores you Whether your 20, or 70 yrs old.

[Paprika]

Asalamu Alaikum,
An ideal husband is one who helps your iman increase, Prays and reads alongside with you
A man who apologizes Although hes right, doesnt get mad often And when he does he remains calm despite the situation , cleans without being asked to, Brings you Food knowing how much he enjoys having it brought to him, attempt to ensure your happy..
Loves, Cares, and Adores you Whether your 20, or 70 yrs old.

What?? apologize if I am right?? You gotta make me a swallow a 100 Paprika's before that will happen.:raging:

otherwise most of it sounds like me:statisfie