Tips to Teach Kids Personal Body Safety

[nousername]

Asalamu alaykum,

Living in the world we live in today, we know that their are many many sick people who prey on innocent children. I was wondering if anyone has good tips to teach younger kids body safety.. such as the differences between "bad touches" and what's normal, and how to stand up for themselves if they are uncomfortable with someone. And doing it in a way not to make them paranoid... JZK for your help, inshaAllah.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

Wa alaykum us-Salaam
i think kids can already distinguish between what is good and bad in the respect you are talking about.

we need to have an open and understanding relationship with our kids.

generally we need to teach them be to careful around strangers (not unless you live in a place that is absolutely trustworthy, etc). if we are worried about them being around strangers, etc, perhaps we are undermining our parenthood and not taking proper responsibility to begin with. i.e maybe we need to be around them more often and/or only take them out to places were others are trustworthy? i cant think of a place or a situation where children are going to get hurt. you are either with them and thus no one dares messes with them. or if you aren't around them, then you have left them with someone trustworthy.

kids are smart and the best way to teach then something is to explain concepts to them in a manner they understand.

[nousername]

Yeah what you said makes a lot of sense, I was just seeing on TV how most perps are those that are close to the family and are really trusted, and many take months or years to "groom" the child to eventually get alone with him/her and then hurt him. Those are the people that are the most frightening, as opposed to the much rarer random stranger hurting kids.

[Ummu Sufyaan]

^you can usually tell when someone has bad intentions even if they are really good at covering their tracks, because eventually they slip or you can tell they aren't acting themselves...somehow without realizing it, they contradict themselves/"dob" themselves in. somewhere along the lines you notice something odd.

and if not, you have to rely on your child to tell you. this is why i said you need to have open and understanding relationship with your kids just in case (god forbid) something happens, they need to know that there is someone who they can confine is and support them. if children sense that they aren't being listened to or they feel awkward around certain people, then they aren't really going to be open with them. of course you have kids who make up porkies, but i don't think kids would have developed the intellect to understand what child offenders do, let alone make up a story about it :hmm: its just something that isn't witnessed/out in the open for kids to pick on what child offenders do, so they wont have any "sources" to give them ideas...does that make sense?

going up to your first post where you said to advice them without getting them paranoid, i suppose you just have to encourage them and reassure them that they can speak to you about anything and that they shouldn't be afraid. indirect ways like that, i think will encourage the child to come forward.

how to avoid anything like this happening at all before anything happens? good question. always make dua to Allah to protect your children is a good start imo.

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[free-soul78]

I think ur worries is every mom's nightmare, especially with how the world is changing. And i think we need to explain to them about bad touches, coz a child is usually trusty by nature, and even if he/she feels something is wrong will never come forward n report it to his/her parent if that parent wasn't open with him/her. So yes, i completely agree with u, n we should teach them the proper way of behaving even with thier uncles other related males. I'd rather be paranoia than have someone hurt my child.