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anonymous
09-13-2010, 06:17 PM
First off I just want to say alot of things have happened to me over this past year that have changed me to be a better muslim
Ill start from the beginning. 2 years ago during high school, (year 11) I was surrounded with good freinds, and Alhamdulillah they had a positive influance on me, most of them now do alima courses. As a result of all this influance I started wearing hijab, and jilbab, both in a short space of time. I really wanted to start an alima course last year to better myself, .....
but as im doing a-level my parents thought id find it too hard, and my mum was aginst the idea, because she wants me to do well in my academic studies. She does hav my best interest at heart, but I can't explain to her why I want/need to do it. Also I dont have any bro/sis I can talk to at home, I feel alone and really lonely at times, and this has had a negative effect on me. I know I cant change nt having a bro or sis I can talk to and even mess about with. I kno that but it still upsets me, when its quiet in the house, and I need to talk to someone. I do have a lil bro and a sis with down sydome, but I cant talk to them. I don't kno how Id be without them. Before I used to go out with my freinds and id be around people, but now I hardly go out as much (As i dont have the same circle of freinds) and the freinds I do have I feel i can't really open up to. :cry::cry:

Things have just been piling over this past year...during the beginning of ramadan I started getting doubts about why we're here, I started questioning 'why can't jesus be the son of God?'..(astagfirullah)...I really didn't want to think these thoughts...but they kept coming in my mind.....and I got SO scared because this was in ramadan when shaytaan was locked away(so it couldn't have been wiswasas could it??).....I was literally convincing myself to stop thinking like that, i kept going over in my mind why it wasn't possible, I actually had a moment where I felt like disbeliver.....These thoughts have gone now...I don't want to think like this but they just come in my head...

This is anther reason why I want to do an alima course, to get a better understanding of Islam and strenghten my imaan, so this dosen't happen again..and on top I will be be surounded with good freinds...I actually feel like im going crazy/insane sometimes...and i just needed to let all that out...Please any advice on how I should go about being positive. I know SO many people out there have much worser problems than what im going thru, but all this is slowly eating away at me, and I feel confused about what to do, and who to tell. I feel depressed, and sometimes I can't stop crying imsadimsad

Sorry about the long post.
:wa:
Reply

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Ummu Sufyaan
09-14-2010, 11:36 AM
:sl:
if your parents disagree with you to find knowledge in the manner you want to, there are always alternatives such as writing down what you want to study, the books required and somehow integrate that into your normal timetable. you dont have to spend hours seeking knowledge, even an hour of dedication and you will find that you will gain a good amount of knowledge. every last break you have, such as lunch during college you can read a book, etc. when you don't have much time to learn you will feel more keen to learn and thus find you remember and are motivated to gain knowledge.

with friends, i find the less friends i have, the better it is for my social life. i find that i can trust/am closer/can open up to to the one or two close friends, rather than having a handful of friends who i cant really speak with. so maybe it maybe your level of "closeness" you have that is affecting your friendships and ability to socialize. also can you actually socialize? i mean d you have trouble talking to people? do you get scared of people? this could be another reason why your social life isn't so great. what is the relationship with the friends you currently have? do you trust them? do you have a close relationship with them or are they just people you happen to hang out with? this also affects your ability to have a more personal level of friendship with people.

and your siblings... people with down syndrome cant speak? you don't have to be talking to someone to be communicating with them. is there any other way you can communicate with them...like i know people who are deaf communicate through the use of sign language? do people with down syndrome have similar means?


Things have just been piling over this past year...during the beginning of ramadan I started getting doubts about why we're here, I started questioning 'why can't jesus be the son of God?'..(astagfirullah)...I really didn't want to think these thoughts...but they kept coming in my mind.....and I got SO scared because this was in ramadan when shaytaan was locked away(so it couldn't have been wiswasas could it??).....I was literally convincing myself to stop thinking like that, i kept going over in my mind why it wasn't possible, I actually had a moment where I felt like disbeliver.....These thoughts have gone now...I don't want to think like this but they just come in my head...
mashaAllah you sound like a very pious sister.
these thoughts are so normal, even the sahabis, radhiallahu anhum used to get them. its just shaytaans way of trying to annoy and distress you. check this out: http://islamqa.com/en/ref/12315/waswaas

and this (from Islamqa as well)
The companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him complaining about the doubts and waswaas that they were suffering. In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Some of the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him and said, ‘We find in our hearts things that none of us dares utter.’ He said, ‘Do you really find that?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘That is clear faith.’” (2/153).

What is meant by his saying ‘That is clear faith’ is that their hatred of that waswasah and their rejecting it was a clear sign of faith.

The Shaytaan only whispers to people of faith; as for the kaafir he comes to him however he wants and does not limit himself to waswaas, rather he toys with him however he wishes.
See? shaytaan doesn't approach a kaafir like this because he has no use for them.

the remedy?

1 – If you feel that you are being affected by this waswaas, say, “Aamantu Billaahi wa Rasoolihi (I believe in Allaah and His Messenger).” It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Shaytaan comes to one of you and says, ‘Who created you?’ And he says ‘Allaah.’ Then the Shaytaan says, ‘Who created Allaah?’ If that happens to any one of you, let him say, Aamantu Billaahi wa Rusulihi (I believe in Allaah and His Messenger). Then that will go away from him.”

(Narrated by Ahmad, 25671; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in al-Saheehah, 116)
.
http://islamqa.com/en/ref/25778
Reply

Snowflake
09-14-2010, 11:54 AM
:sl: May Allah bless you my little darling. Please don't despair ok? Life has ups and downs. And the downs aren't all that bad as they teach us a lot and make us stronger people. It doesn't feel like it at the time, but you realise it later. Ok, about the waswas. I get them too. Yes even in Ramadhan. The shaytaans are locked up. But there is one with us since we were born, and he will only leave when we die. When you get waswas, recite a udhu billahi minashaytaan ir rajeem 3 x and dry spit over your left shoulder. Imagine a bubble of imaan around you as your shield and let the waswas bounce of it, unable to affect you.

Other than that, strengthen your imaan. Make lots of dhikr. Keep praising Allah with praises He loves. Subhan Allah wal hamdulillah wa lailaha illAllahu wallahu akbar.. subhan Allah wa bihamdihi subhanAllah il adheem.. la ilaha illAllah.. subhanAllah.. alhamdulillah.. Allahu akbar. Do this anywhere, any time, and as often as you can. Do it in seclusion, doing household chores, at your PC, shopping, and soon you will find your heart automatically turning to Allah in the midst of gatherings where Allah's name is not being mentioned, but your tongue will be making remembrance of Him. InshaAllah, your imaan, sabr, and Allah blessings on you will increase because of it.


Try not to be sad about not having siblings you can talk to. Put this in your heart that Allah is your best friend, and make a habit of sharing your pain, fears and worries with Allah. Allah won't answer with a voice. But His reply to you will be better than what any parents, sibling, human can give you. It's all about how we think sweetie. Sometimes we share with people but still feel uneasy. So we share with the next person, and still feel the need to talk to someone else about it. But when you share with Allah, you will find peace, and you will feel the burden lift and your worries calmed. Doing this will also bring you closer to Allah inshaAllah.


Your mum is right. Your studies are important too, and you don't have to be an alima to strengthen your imaan and get a better understanding of Islam. InshaAllah focus on your studies and at the same time, increase your knowledge of Islam. read the Quran with understanding, learn the meanings of Allah's beautiful names and attributes, start reading about matters of Fiqh (Islamic Law). Join a sister's circle. Increase voluntary ibadah. Improve your character. You see my dear sis, when you strive for the sake of Allah, Allah Himself gives you understanding of the deen.


The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "When Allah wants to do good for a person, He gives him understanding of the deen."

And Allah wants to do good for those who want to do good for His sake. So don't worry if you can't do an alima course just yet. Once you've completed your A levels, you can discuss with your parents that this is what you want to do, and inshaAllah you can start it with renewed vigour and without the worry of juggling your academic studies and alima course. Ask Allah! Don't ever let obstacles stop you from relying on Allah. Say, O Allah I want to do this alima course for your sake, please make it easy for me and remove the obstacles from my way. Don't ever despair ukhti. Allah is in control of the heavens and earth, and when He wills something, nothing can stop it. Have sabr and faith in Him.


And from now you got a big sis. Me! So you can talk to me anytime. InshaAllah. But you have to be a bit patient with me as sometimes I find it difficult to talk and go 'mute'. As from now you are banned form worrying. Do some dhikr today inshaAllah, and don't forget to thank Allah for all the blessings he has given you.

Fi aman Allah my beloved sis,


:wa:
Reply

anonymous
09-15-2010, 03:08 PM

if your parents disagree with you to find knowledge in the manner you want to, there are always alternatives such as writing down what you want to study, the books required and somehow integrate that into your normal timetable. you dont have to spend hours seeking knowledge, even an hour of dedication and you will find that you will gain a good amount of knowledge. every last break you have, such as lunch during college you can read a book, etc. when you don't have much time to learn you will feel more keen to learn and thus find you remember and are motivated to gain knowledge.
I already do this, and it has just increased my want for knowledge. Over the summer books have become my best freind. The other thing is what should I be reading, Just the other day I was reading a book called 'Words and advice from the Salaf', when I need to know my basics, but this something I hav to work on myself. This year I will Insha'Allah I will concentrate on my studies.

with friends, i find the less friends i have, the better it is for my social life. i find that i can trust/am closer/can open up to to the one or two close friends, rather than having a handful of friends who i cant really speak with. so maybe it maybe your level of "closeness" you have that is affecting your friendships and ability to socialize. also can you actually socialize? i mean d you have trouble talking to people? do you get scared of people? this could be another reason why your social life isn't so great. what is the relationship with the friends you currently have? do you trust them? do you have a close relationship with them or are they just people you happen to hang out with? this also affects your ability to have a more personal level of friendship with people.
I also prefer having a few freinds, Im wouldn't say im shy, I acually like meeting new people, but I do get self-concious at times, like I watch what I say and how I behave, and sometimes It feels im talking/saying things just to please them. I get times where I feel like im a boring person, so I try and make a convosation

and your siblings... people with down syndrome cant speak? you don't have to be talking to someone to be communicating with them. is there any other way you can communicate with them...like i know people who are deaf communicate through the use of sign language? do people with down syndrome have similar means?
People who have down syndrome, can understand only little, We do sign at home, and I talk to my sis, but this is limited too, like only general things can be understood, like do you want to play this? ect, so I cant talk about probems, worries. So when I do feel down I feel theres no-one there to comfort me, and then I tend to keep how im feeling bottled up and then I put on a happy face. :cry:


these thoughts are so normal, even the sahabis, radhiallahu anhum used to get them. its just shaytaans way of trying to annoy and distress you. check this out: http://islamqa.com/en/ref/12315/waswaas

and this (from Islamqa as well)


The companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him complaining about the doubts and waswaas that they were suffering. In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Some of the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him and said, ‘We find in our hearts things that none of us dares utter.’ He said, ‘Do you really find that?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘That is clear faith.’” (2/153).

What is meant by his saying ‘That is clear faith’ is that their hatred of that waswasah and their rejecting it was a clear sign of faith.

The Shaytaan only whispers to people of faith; as for the kaafir he comes to him however he wants and does not limit himself to waswaas, rather he toys with him however he wishes.


See? shaytaan doesn't approach a kaafir like this because he has no use for them.

the remedy?



1 – If you feel that you are being affected by this waswaas, say, “Aamantu Billaahi wa Rasoolihi (I believe in Allaah and His Messenger).”

^ Jazak'Allah Khair for that. I was really afraid of why I was thinking like that, and I didn't tell anyone, because I felt ashamed and embarrased of it.
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anonymous
09-15-2010, 03:36 PM
Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
Try not to be sad about not having siblings you can talk to. Put this in your heart that Allah is your best friend, and make a habit of sharing your pain, fears and worries with Allah. Allah won't answer with a voice. But His reply to you will be better than what any parents, sibling, human can give you. It's all about how we think sweetie. Sometimes we share with people but still feel uneasy. So we share with the next person, and still feel the need to talk to someone else about it. But when you share with Allah, you will find peace, and you will feel the burden lift and your worries calmed. Doing this will also bring you closer to Allah inshaAllah
Insha'Allah I will do this from now onwards, I've never thought of it in that way.
Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
And Allah wants to do good for those who want to do good for His sake. So don't worry if you can't do an alima course just yet. Once you've completed your A levels, you can discuss with your parents that this is what you want to do, and inshaAllah you can start it with renewed vigour and without the worry of juggling your academic studies and alima course. Ask Allah! Don't ever let obstacles stop you from relying on Allah. Say, O Allah I want to do this alima course for your sake, please make it easy for me and remove the obstacles from my way. Don't ever despair ukhti. Allah is in control of the heavens and earth, and when He wills something, nothing can stop it. Have sabr and faith in Him.

I hav decided to concentrate on my academic studies, and Insha'Allah then Alima. Jazak'Allah for all your words. They have given me a positive outlook..
Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
And from now you got a big sis. Me! So you can talk to me anytime. InshaAllah. But you have to be a bit patient with me as sometimes I find it difficult to talk and go 'mute'. As from now you are banned form worrying. Do some dhikr today inshaAllah, and don't forget to thank Allah for all the blessings he has given you. Fi aman Allah my beloved sis,
:) :) Aww I feel much better...and Insha'Allah I will stop worrying, Love you for the sake of Allah sis.
Reply

Muslim Woman
09-15-2010, 04:19 PM
Salaam

Originally Posted by anonymous
Aww I feel much better....

:D

Alhamdulillah.
Reply

Snowflake
09-16-2010, 04:56 PM
Al hamdulillah my precious lil sis. Love you too in Allah. Allah will do much good for you inshaAllah. :statisfie
Reply

Salahudeen
09-17-2010, 11:15 PM
why don't you attend some classes for sisters at your local masjid, you could make like minded friends there to share your troubles with. Even if it's just a weekly class on arabic or tajweed. You need to get active I think, not going out much is bad because it can lead to depression sitting in the house all the time staring at screens.

Take up some kind of hobby that lets you interact with people like some sort of class.
Reply

Hamza Asadullah
09-20-2010, 10:57 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
First off I just want to say alot of things have happened to me over this past year that have changed me to be a better muslim
Ill start from the beginning. 2 years ago during high school, (year 11) I was surrounded with good freinds, and Alhamdulillah they had a positive influance on me, most of them now do alima courses. As a result of all this influance I started wearing hijab, and jilbab, both in a short space of time. I really wanted to start an alima course last year to better myself, .....
but as im doing a-level my parents thought id find it too hard, and my mum was aginst the idea, because she wants me to do well in my academic studies. She does hav my best interest at heart, but I can't explain to her why I want/need to do it. Also I dont have any bro/sis I can talk to at home, I feel alone and really lonely at times, and this has had a negative effect on me. I know I cant change nt having a bro or sis I can talk to and even mess about with. I kno that but it still upsets me, when its quiet in the house, and I need to talk to someone. I do have a lil bro and a sis with down sydome, but I cant talk to them. I don't kno how Id be without them. Before I used to go out with my freinds and id be around people, but now I hardly go out as much (As i dont have the same circle of freinds) and the freinds I do have I feel i can't really open up to. :cry::cry:

Things have just been piling over this past year...during the beginning of ramadan I started getting doubts about why we're here, I started questioning 'why can't jesus be the son of God?'..(astagfirullah)...I really didn't want to think these thoughts...but they kept coming in my mind.....and I got SO scared because this was in ramadan when shaytaan was locked away(so it couldn't have been wiswasas could it??).....I was literally convincing myself to stop thinking like that, i kept going over in my mind why it wasn't possible, I actually had a moment where I felt like disbeliver.....These thoughts have gone now...I don't want to think like this but they just come in my head...

This is anther reason why I want to do an alima course, to get a better understanding of Islam and strenghten my imaan, so this dosen't happen again..and on top I will be be surounded with good freinds...I actually feel like im going crazy/insane sometimes...and i just needed to let all that out...Please any advice on how I should go about being positive. I know SO many people out there have much worser problems than what im going thru, but all this is slowly eating away at me, and I feel confused about what to do, and who to tell. I feel depressed, and sometimes I can't stop crying imsadimsad

Sorry about the long post.
:wa:


Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister Allah gave you guidance so that you may enter into the deen and practice it and you should thank him abundantely for that. It is also very commendable that you have a zeal for wanting to learn Islamic knowledge as knowledge is SO important and the best of the people are those with knowledge but we must realise that having knowledge also brings about its dangers and the dangers are that if we do not act upon the knowledge we have then we will be accountable for it because we know when others did'nt and knowledge which is not acted upon is of no use. So it is better to learn little at a time and act upon everything we learn.

Take things a step at a time sister. Know that your parents just want the best for you so serve them as much as you can for serving ones parents is better than jihad itself. Be the best towards your parents and treat them the best for your reward is with Allah.

Do the best you can in your academic studies and at the same time involve yourself in local Islamic courses and sisters circles as well surrounding yourself with learned and pious sisters. Also get advice from learned sisters on which Islamic books to read and at the same time get a good tafseer of the Qur'an and learn what Allah is telling us in the Qur'an.

If you wanted to pursue the Aalima course then you may do that at a later stage and nowadays they even run part time flexible courses which fit around ones busy schedule. So after studies you may be able to pursue that but if not then you can always continue learning from courses, lectures and sisters circles halaqas etc.

Ask of Allah to help you to gain knowledge and to act upon it and to benefit others from it. Allah makes it easy for those who want to acquire knowledge of deen and the angels spread their wings for them.

Surely shaythan is trying to confuse you by whispering deception in your ears but no matter what you say with your tongue but if you don't believe it with your heart then there is no sin upon you. Only if there is acceptance from your heart will you committ shirk. So do not worry and if you ever get such evil whispers then just seek refuge in Allah from the evil of shaythan by saying: A'udubillahi minashaythanirajeem and La Hawla Wala Quwatha Illah billah.

Do not let your sworn enemy shaythan make you feel lonely and deter you from getting close to Allah. He can only whisper but you have the power to disregard and reject his evil. therefore ask of Allah to make you strong against the whispers of shaythan and your desires.

Also my sister know that it is a blessing that you have siblings who are angels at home for those with conditions like downs syndrome are like angels for they will not be accountable for their actions in this world. So be the best towards them and play with them for the pleasure of Allah.

Also my sister establish a close connection and bond with Allah through worship and dua. Allah is wanting you to go close to him so strive and get as close to Allah as you can through fulfilling ALL of your daily fard Salaah as well as the extra Sunnah and Nawafil for the more prostrations you do the closer to Allah you will become. Click on this link for Nawafil we can pray everyday:

VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-Pray-Everyday!


Remember Allah as much as you can for the one who remembers Allah then Allah remembers them and there is NOTHING in this world that will give you peace, blessings, contentment and happiness in your heart than in the remembrance of Allah so glorify him as much as you can and remember him night and day no matter what you are doing. Keep your tongue moist with the glorification of Allah in every aspect of your life and if you have Allah in your heart then how will you EVER feel lonely again?

Click on this link for Easy but very rewarding Dhikrullah we can do everyday:

Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-on-the-scales!

So my sister know that Allah is closer to you than your jugular vein. He is there for you when no one else is. He knows you MUCH better than you know yourself. He will NEVER let you down when you need him but people will. Allah is wanting you close to him so strive to please him and be as close to him as possible. With Allah you will find happiness you have never imagined as if you have Jannah in your heart!

Ask of Allah to give you a good understanding of Islam and to give you wisdom and knowledge that you can act upon and benefit others with. Ask of him ALWAYS no matter how little it is and share ALL your feelings with him whenever you are feeling down, lonely and especially when you are happy for those who remember him when they are happy then Allah will remember them when they are sad. Thank Allah abundantley and Allah will give more to those who are appreciative.

Repent to Allah as much as you can and cry to him in dua for Allah listens to those who cry moore attentively just like a mother attends to its baby when it is crying. Make habit of praying Tahajjud Salaah at night for those who are wanting to gain closeness to Allah and the top ranks of Paradise should pray Tahajjud in the last third of the night and this is the time when prayers are readily accepted.

Therefore my sister remember put your FULL trust, faith, reliance and hopes in Allah and he will ALWAYS be there for you and you will NEVER feel lonely again!

Please remember me in your dua's.

Here are some very beneficial lectures to increase your imaan and fear of Allah:


Remembrance: ask Allah for his forgiveness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-EK9r3rMzQ


Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 1/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieX7ZQtHl0s

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 2/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK_2sVGMW08

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 3/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpmzA2hk1Bo

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 4/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km39GfL62TQ

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Journey of the Soul

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAwHEXE3-n0


HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc


Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE

Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo

How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg[/QUOTE]

AMAZING short speech -"The Goodly Life"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fugf1DcNyc




Here are some very beneficial articles for you to help you on your journey to Jannah and to make best use of every second of your life in this world:



10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith)

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...our-Iman(Faith)

30 ways the youth should spend everyday of their lives!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...of-their-lives!

Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-on-the-scales!

My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...worship)-check!

10 steps to getting closer to Allah

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...loser-to-Allah

Forty Very Easy, Quick & Rewarding Good Deeds for all of us to do Everyday!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...to-do-Everyday!

Not praying Salaah 5 times a day? Here's the solution!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...s-the-solution!

VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-Pray-Everyday!


and Allah knows best in all matters
Reply

Ummu Sufyaan
09-21-2010, 03:41 AM
Originally Posted by anonymous
I already do this, and it has just increased my want for knowledge. Over the summer books have become my best freind. The other thing is what should I be reading, Just the other day I was reading a book called 'Words and advice from the Salaf', when I need to know my basics, but this something I hav to work on myself. This year I will Insha'Allah I will concentrate on my studies.
ahh good stuff then. just keep up with the determination and slowly build up from what you know.

I also prefer having a few freinds, Im wouldn't say im shy, I acually like meeting new people, but I do get self-concious at times, like I watch what I say and how I behave, and sometimes It feels im talking/saying things just to please them. I get times where I feel like im a boring person, so I try and make a convosation
you should be sincere to yourself and not say things for the sake of it. sometimes that can get you in trouble :hmm: i doubt you are a boring person, its probably just being different from everyone else.

People who have down syndrome, can understand only little, We do sign at home, and I talk to my sis, but this is limited too, like only general things can be understood, like do you want to play this? ect, so I cant talk about probems, worries. So when I do feel down I feel theres no-one there to comfort me, and then I tend to keep how im feeling bottled up and then I put on a happy face. :cry:
cant you write letters to them or something like that?

^ Jazak'Allah Khair for that. I was really afraid of why I was thinking like that, and I didn't tell anyone, because I felt ashamed and embarrased of it.
no, you shouldn't think like that. you should talk to someone about it to get help...its not something uncommon.
Reply

anonymous
09-29-2010, 08:13 AM
:sl:
Originally Posted by Scents of Jannah
Al hamdulillah my precious lil sis. Love you too in Allah. Allah will do much good for you inshaAllah. :statisfie
Insha'Allah


Do the best you can in your academic studies and at the same time involve yourself in local Islamic courses and sisters circles as well surrounding yourself with learned and pious sisters. Also get advice from learned sisters on which Islamic books to read and at the same time get a good tafseer of the Qur'an and learn what Allah is telling us in the Qur'an.

If you wanted to pursue the Aalima course then you may do that at a later stage and nowadays they even run part time flexible courses which fit around ones busy schedule. So after studies you may be able to pursue that but if not then you can always continue learning from courses, lectures and sisters circles halaqas etc.
Jazak'Allah brother for that advice. There arn't many halaqas where I live, but we do have lectures/bayaans, so Insha'Allah I will attend those.
I feel like I have something missing, I don't know if that makes sense, but I want to revolve my day around learning, and I feel like Im wasting too much time with my academic studies. I know they're going to help me in the long-run, job wise, ect, but I want to do both.

Also my sister know that it is a blessing that you have siblings who are angels at home for those with conditions like downs syndrome are like angels for they will not be accountable for their actions in this world. So be the best towards them and play with them for the pleasure of Allah.

Also my sister establish a close connection and bond with Allah through worship and dua. Allah is wanting you to go close to him so strive and get as close to Allah as you can through fulfilling ALL of your daily fard Salaah as well as the extra Sunnah and Nawafil for the more prostrations you do the closer to Allah you will become. Click on this link for Nawafil we can pray everyday:
Ive never looked at it that way before. Im happy now that I have the chance to help/care for her.
Jazak'Allah Khair for the links and advice.

May Allah swt bless you and shower you with his mercy. May he grant you Jannat-ul-Fidows. Ameen

cant you write letters to them or something like that?
Nope, But im happy commuunicating via signs now. Guess you don't always need speech to convey feelings.
:wa:
Reply

tango92
09-29-2010, 08:39 AM
salaam.

i hope you can read arabic sis. if so try to memorize some short surahs, learn the meanings, and recite them to yourself whenever you wish. i find this helps strengthen my imaan. because of just the beauty of the words even if you dont understand the arabic.

and inshallah learn to speak arabic and read it. i think this is the best long term solution to waswaas.

and lastly do NOT neglect your academic studies. whaat good is a believer who cannot stand on her own two feet?
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