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anonymous
10-18-2010, 06:26 PM
Salam everyone!
I know this might sound a bit stupid, but I do want to find out an answer, and I don't have anyone to talk to or ask.

Well, I need some advice about University, and staying on the right path there etc:
Basically, I started University this year, and on my course, there's only 3 hijabi's and a couple of other Muslim sisters who don't wear the scarf, but do everything thats haram (eg clubbing, all the late night socials etc)

We're put into groups. People add each other on facebook, take each others numbers etc. I don't mind giving them to the girls or adding them, but what do you do or say when a boy adds you or asks for your number - in work terms of course. Because, we do all talk to each other during Uni - we're in the same group, so it wouldn't make sense to say I can't add you because I don't speak to boys?

I don't know. Could you please give me some beneficial advice to help me around Uni. I've joined the ISOC and spend all my free time/lunchtimes with the ISOC sisters. So my praying, iman etc is all good alhamdullilah. It's just during work time.

Jazakum Allahu Khairan for your replies in advance
Wasalaam
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Cabdullahi
10-19-2010, 10:50 PM
You have to make rules and stick by them...if them dudes want to ask you a question regarding the work...they ask you in the lesson...when you step outside of the classroom door you don't know them they don't know you...simple as

Once a guy has ur contact details....its a done deal for him all he has to do is switch on the emotional switch to get what he wants and then leave when he's done.......to put them out of the game dont give your number out!
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Dagless
10-19-2010, 11:30 PM
If you work with them as part of a group then I assume a lot of the work will be done outside class? If so, it may look odd if you don't give them some means of contact.

format_quote Originally Posted by Abdullahii
Once a guy has ur contact details....its a done deal for him all he has to do is switch on the emotional switch to get what he wants and then leave when he's done
We are talking about universities, not escort services.
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Hamza Asadullah
10-20-2010, 12:35 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by anonymous
Salam everyone!
I know this might sound a bit stupid, but I do want to find out an answer, and I don't have anyone to talk to or ask.

Well, I need some advice about University, and staying on the right path there etc:
Basically, I started University this year, and on my course, there's only 3 hijabi's and a couple of other Muslim sisters who don't wear the scarf, but do everything thats haram (eg clubbing, all the late night socials etc)

We're put into groups. People add each other on facebook, take each others numbers etc. I don't mind giving them to the girls or adding them, but what do you do or say when a boy adds you or asks for your number - in work terms of course. Because, we do all talk to each other during Uni - we're in the same group, so it wouldn't make sense to say I can't add you because I don't speak to boys?

I don't know. Could you please give me some beneficial advice to help me around Uni. I've joined the ISOC and spend all my free time/lunchtimes with the ISOC sisters. So my praying, iman etc is all good alhamdullilah. It's just during work time.

Jazakum Allahu Khairan for your replies in advance
Wasalaam
Asalaamu Alaikum, my sister firstly know that no matter how practising you are shaythan will always try to gradually break you in so many different ways as he has done to so many countless brothers and sisters all of whom are also practising. The example you gave is a perfect example as shaythan tries to make it out to the person that it is completley innocent to give a boy your number whom is in the same course and you interact anyway so what is the matter with giving your number right? This is exactly what he will eventually make you think and this is how he will have an opportunity of gradually causing you to do haraam.

Therefore my sister know that this is pure evil deception from shaythan and you must NEVER give your number or e mail address to any guy. Me personally sister i used to have Facebook a few years ago but i eventually noticed that there is too much fitnah on there. I personally don't know why people feel the need to have an account on there like it is a must and without it one would lose touch with the world and all of ones associates but that is just rubbish and just another way of shaythan having an avenue to try and get a person to do haraam. These places ae breeding grounds for intermingling of the sexes. I don't know why Muslims are still on Facebook knwoing the fact that they refused to ban the Burn the Qur'an group on there. They are one of the instruments of the evil media which is controlled by the zionists and i personally think sister that you should save your imaan and delete your account. If you are going to keep it then restrict it completley and never add any guy and never put any personal information or pictures up on there of yourself or family.

My sister Universities in this country are big breeding grounds for haraam and mixing of the sexes and therefore you should be aware that shaythan will attack you from all angles and even more when he knows your practising. Even in the Islamic societies in universities you will notice a lot of free mixing with the "hijaabis" and practising brothers with beards. Never let shaythan give you an excuse to talk freely with a guy for any reason whatsoever. If he is in yuor group then talk to him only when necessery and do not ever exchange numbers or e mail addresses. As long as you maintain this throughout your university life then you will be safe. Make this an opportunity to give dawah to sisters and get together with other practising sisters to come up with activities and ways to involve other sisters in deen and Islam.

You have the potential of gaining a lot of good deeds and pleasing Allah greatly so take this opportunity and do not let shaythan ever give you the opportunity of displeasing Allah as he will continuously try to break you even when you least expect it. Ask of Allah to help and guide you and to keep you strong. Remember worship of the youth is the best of worship worthy of so much reward so make the best of this time in doing good and pleasing Allah. Do not waste this precious time by falling into grave sin which you will regret forever.

My sister i have pasted some beneficial links for you of some wonderful lectures of death and the hereafter aswell as some very beneficial threads to help you to make the best of everyday to please Allah. You may also use these lectures and also threads to maybe do some short talks or for dawah purposes or you can also print out the articles to hand out to others.

Try to remember death as often as you can as this will always help in keeping one strong. Learn about Islam as much as possible and involve yourself in dawah and activities which will benefit other Muslims. Also if you evr get the opportunity then try to give dawah to non Muslim girls as much as possible.

Hope that helped. Please remember me in your dua's.

Here are some very beneficial lectures to increase your imaan and fear of Allah:

Remembrance: ask Allah for his forgiveness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-EK9r3rMzQ

Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 1/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ieX7ZQtHl0s

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 2/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK_2sVGMW08

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 3/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpmzA2hk1Bo

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - Death (The Destroyer of Pleasures) [part 4/4]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km39GfL62TQ

Imam Anwar al-Awlaki - The Journey of the Soul

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAwHEXE3-n0

HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc

Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE

Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo

How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg


AMAZING short speech -"The Goodly Life"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fugf1DcNyc


Here are some very beneficial articles for you to help you on your journey to Jannah and to make best use of every second of your life in this world:

10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith)

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...our-Iman(Faith)

30 ways the youth should spend everyday of their lives!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...of-their-lives!

Easy Dhikr which is light on the tongue but heavy on the scales!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-on-the-scales!

My Daily Ibadah (worship) check!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...worship)-check!

10 steps to getting closer to Allah

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...loser-to-Allah

Forty Very Easy, Quick & Rewarding Good Deeds for all of us to do Everyday!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...to-do-Everyday!

Not praying Salaah 5 times a day? Here's the solution!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...s-the-solution!

VERY Rewarding Nafl Salaahs we can Pray Everyday!

http://www.islamicboard.com/showthre...-Pray-Everyday!


and Allah knows best in all matters
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Cabdullahi
10-20-2010, 06:38 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by Dagless
If you work with them as part of a group then I assume a lot of the work will be done outside class? If so, it may look odd if you don't give them some means of contact.



We are talking about universities, not escort services.
universities can be like brothels....when you hang around with the wrong crowd
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tango92
10-20-2010, 07:22 AM
boys will talk to girls who are easy/ extroverted/ confident etc etc, once you show no interest, even social interest, with them then inshallah they will learn to repect you over time and limit discussions to academia.

try to turn conversations into work related ones
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