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anonymous
12-03-2010, 10:49 AM
i think i have a problem called arrogance. you see there is this person that i dont really like that much and sometimes when i see something good going their way, i dont want it to, cos i guess its hard for me to belive that that person is good at whatever it is they are good at. sounds silly i know and i really hate that im like this. i dont even really know why im like this it may have something to do with how they have hurt me in the past.

im wondering if this is arrogance, but even if it isn't, how do i get rid of these feelings. my heart is really sick and i just need help on how to cleanse it, from every sickness that it has.
its not so much that i want to be better than this person (i dont really care), i guess its cos this person has hurt me in the past, they dont really care and i feel sometimes that maybe they act like this towards me becuase they either think that im inferoir to them or im a threat to them somehow (dont get me wrong, i dont have a high opinion of myself) and in case of the former they want to make my life miserable and in the case of the latter they want to compete and try be better then me. i just hate how this person has to copy me in everything and...oh its just horrible :( why me? what do i have that is great :raging:

anyway how do you get rid of those feelings of arrogance, cos it really isnt a nice feeling, even if it isnt haram. i dont like to feel insecure like this. i dont like the idea that my ugly heart could feel like this towards someone-even if i hated them. i dont like the idea that my sick heart could deprive someone of something that maybe good for them. why cant i just be the laid back person i was i minded my own business people minded theirs. i dont want to be in competition to anyone.

another thing you know somehow how people can be horrible to you that it makes you into a horrible person somehow :-[ how do you not let things take that turn :( feelings can be so compelling and being mean to people is easy but i dont want to be mean to people.
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Ansariyah
12-03-2010, 11:33 AM
I heard the best way to get rid of Hate, Arrogance, or any ill-feeling towards another, is to make dua for them. Insha'Allah Allah will remove this impurity from ur heart.
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S.Belle
12-03-2010, 02:42 PM
Originally Posted by anonymous
im wondering if this is arrogance, but even if it isn't, how do i get rid of these feelings
to me it sounds like jealousy issues instead of arrogance...try this link about arrogance inshallah it will help
http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/9229
Originally Posted by anonymous
i guess its cos this person has hurt me in the past, they dont really care and i feel sometimes that maybe they act like this towards me becuase they either think that im inferoir to them or im a threat to them somehow (dont get me wrong, i dont have a high opinion of myself) and in case of the former they want to make my life miserable and in the case of the latter they want to compete and try be better then me.
Why dont you just speak to them about your feelings because you never know they may think the same about you and that may be the reason they act as they do. Just have a calm conversation with them and try to understand each others feelings and inshallah everything will be fine..you may even become close friends in the end.


Originally Posted by anonymous
i just hate how this person has to copy me in everything and...oh its just horrible why me?
Instead of looking at it in a negative light be positive about it imitation is one of the highest forms of flattery. Maybe they feel the need to copy you because you are a good person.

Originally Posted by anonymous
another thing you know somehow how people can be horrible to you that it makes you into a horrible person somehow how do you not let things take that turn feelings can be so compelling and being mean to people is easy but i dont want to be mean to people.
well if someone is being horrible to you for no reason ask them why or what did you do to them its usually their own issues and they feel better once they try to make someone else feel horrible bc as they say misery likes company.
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