Love for Children

[Bayan]

All the Abrahamic faiths teach that children are gifts from the all-compassionate and generous God. We should love and care for them with perfect compassion and tenderness to ensure their healthy growth.

The Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, provides an excellent example of how to understand the Islamic concept of nurturing children’s spirituality. In many of his teachings, the Prophet Muhammad emphasized the importance of showing children kindness and compassion. Since children are weak and powerless, their spirits flourish best when they come to know and experience for themselves their compassionate and powerful Creator. Through trust in God and surrender to His guidance, children will be able to face fears and challenges throughout their life.

A child needs to feel safe, and the best way to give them this feeling is to teach them that God is the Most Merciful and the Most Compassionate and that He is protecting them from all evil. A child – weak and needy – can feel secure in life only through this belief. Furthermore, teaching a child to be grateful for everything they possess and receive is another vital aspect for healthy spiritual development. A child should be made aware that everything that is given to them ultimately comes from God. In this way, they will grow into a thankful and appreciative person.

Showing mercy and love to children has a special place in the Islamic faith. The Prophet stated,

“Whoever does not show mercy to his children is not one of us [Muslims].”

Thus the Prophet Muhammad taught that children should be approached with mercy, love, respect, and trust, while Islamic teachings particularly emphasize mercy and love. His wife Aisha gave the following example:

“One day a person from the desert came to the Prophet Muhammad and said, “You are kissing children but traditionally we don’t kiss them.” The Prophet replied, “What can I do if God removed mercy from your heart?”

Another teaching by the Prophet on this concept concerns his grandson Hasan:

“One day the Prophet was in one of the markets of Medina. He left the market and so did I. Then he asked thrice, “Where is the small child?” Then he said, “Call Hasan.” So Hasan got up and started walking with a necklace of beads around his neck. The Prophet stretched his hand out like this, and Hasan did the same. The Prophet embraced him and said, “O Allah! I love him, so please love him and love those who love him.” Since Allah’s Apostle said that, nothing has been dearer to me than Hasan.”

He never made any distinctions between his sons and daughters, saying

“How beautiful a child is a girl—compassionate, helpful, easygoing, blessed, and full of motherly feelings.”

The Prophet Muhammad did not limit his love and mercy and showed love and mercy to children from different religions. He taught Muslims to treat neighbors of other faiths as their closest relatives. For example, the Prophet Muhammad visited one of his Jewish neighbor’s sons when he was ill.

The Prophet Muhammad placed a special importance on playing with children. He encouraged parents to play with their children, and said that whoever has small children should become like children, too, in order to play with them. One time, the Prophet and some of his students were invited to a dinner. On the way to attend this dinner, they ran into the Prophet’s grandson Hussein, who was a very young child. Hussein was playing with some other children when they saw him. When they saw the children, the Prophet Muhammad went forward and opened his arms wide in order to hug them, and the children started to run around in play. Then the Prophet Muhammad ran after Hussein to join him in his game until he caught him. When he caught Hussein, he put one hand under his chin and one hand at the back of his neck and kissed him.

Children are keen observers; they observe their surroundings closely, and their spiritual life is influenced by this. It is crucial to realize that the immediate family at home, the extended family, the environment at school, and friends all have an impact on the development of a child’s spirituality. The Prophet Muhammad said that every child is born with an ability to become close to God, but that their environment might cause them to drift away.

Everything that surrounds a child has an effect on their soul. Therefore it is necessary that the environment to which the child is exposed should be chosen carefully. Islamic scholars state that the imperfections which a child may absorb from harmful environments place a black spot on their heart. For example, it is the spiritual obligation of all parents to protect their children from indecent images or sounds and people with immoral thoughts, licentious feelings, and sinful eyes. Keeping this in mind, the Prophet Muhammad stated that the first words that a child should hear should be la ilaha illalah, “There is no deity but God.” A child’s entire spiritual knowledge will be based on these first words.

According to Islam, spirituality enters life with daily religious practice. Prayer is one of the five main pillars in Islam. The Prophet Muhammad stated,

“Prayer is the pillar that supports religion.”

Furthermore, the Prophet also stated that one experiences the closest proximity to God when prostrating in prayer. Thus we can understand that the highest level of spirituality is experienced through prayer. Therefore, praying with full concentration is important. To achieve this concentration, most people prefer a quiet atmosphere.

Even though, the presence of children in places of worship may disturb people’s concentration, the Prophet Muhammad’s teachings clearly indicate that he did not remove children from places of prayer. It is reported that even if he was leading the congregational prayer, he did not insist that children leave the place of worship. The Prophet Muhammad went so far as to widen his stance so that children could pass through his legs in play while he led the prayer. Sometimes playing children climbed on his back while he was prostrating. In one case, a baby climbed on him while he was prostrated, and although he was leading the prayer, he remained in that position until the baby climbed down.

The Prophet even allowed infants to be present in places of prayer. He shortened the prayers so that mothers could take care of their babies’ needs. The Prophet said,

“When I stand for prayer, I intend to prolong it, but on hearing the cries of a child, I cut it short, as I dislike troubling the child’s mother.”

In some cases, he held babies in his arms to be able keep them in places of prayer while he was praying. He held them in his arms while he was standing and carefully placed them to his side when prostrating. On this issue the Prophet Muhammad did not make any distinction between boys and girls. It is reported that the Prophet Muhammad came to the mosque carrying Umamah, his granddaughter, on his shoulder. Keeping her on his shoulders, the Prophet Muhammad led [the people] in prayer. When he bowed, he put her down and took her up when he got up. He kept on doing so until he had finished his prayer.

Nor did the Prophet Muhammad seek to remove children from the congregation while he was preaching. One of his students said,

“I saw our Prophet giving a sermon. Hasan was sitting on his knees. During his speech he occasionally would bow down, kiss the child, and say: “I love him.”

The Prophet Muhammad not only allowed children in the mosque, but even assigned a special space for them to join the prayers. Keeping children close by during the daily prayers is of utmost importance, for the child will benefit from the spiritual environment. We learn from these teachings that rather than remove children from places of worship, we should train ourselves to concentrate during prayer in the presence of children. This will improve our ability to focus on our relationship with God during prayer even in distracting environments. In Islam it is important to be able to live spiritually in all parts of life. This goal can be achieved by learning how to be with God even during the difficult times of our lives. A person who trains his concentration and spirit to be close to God during prayer, even in the presence of children, will be able to continue their spirituality during the difficult times of his life.

The Prophet Muhammad is a perfect example for how human beings can be elevated through the stations of spirituality. Following his example, Muslims are required to be transparent with their thoughts. In other words, a Muslim should not think one way and act differently, and it is important to be consistent with children. Witnessing an inconsistency between what adults say and do can lead to deep wounds in the spirituality of a child.

For example, a person might be spiritually healthy in all other respects, but if they are a miser, it might pollute their perfect spirit. Therefore, it is important to teach a child about sharing and having compassion for the needy or less fortunate. The suggested way of teaching is, again, through example; if parents show mercy towards the needy and share their wealth with them, a child will surely grasp the importance of this behavior.

If a parent wants their child to pray like them, they have to pray in the presence of the child in the most sincere and exemplary manner. Performing spiritually moving prayers in the presence of a child has a profound effect on them. Seeing their parent in a state of elation during a devout prayer can open a child’s soul and may lead them to ask questions and learn about the prayer being performed. Explaining the spiritual delights of prayers and rituals in this state would naturally penetrate deeper into the soul of the child. Trying to explain the experience of a spiritually fulfilling ritual that one has never experienced would not have a similar effect on the child.

From: islamgate.org

[Al-Mufarridun]

Jazakallah Khair sis. Raising righteous children is like an extension of ones life and good deeds. May Allah(swt) grant us all righteous children that benefit us in this world and in the Akhirah. Ameen.

[SlaveOfGod]

Jazakallah Khair sis. Raising righteous children is like an extension of ones life and good deeds. May Allah(swt) grant us all righteous children that benefit us in this world and in the Akhirah. Ameen.

Ameen.

And yes sister, Jazakallukhair for pointing out that love for children is really important in Islam, despite other people's thoughts.