Originally Posted by adz89
Jazakallahu khayr for sharing your question with us. My brother whenever one is going about marriage then they should do so in the permissable means or at least the closest to the permissable means as possible. This means that as a man you should make all contact with her through a mahram or at least let one of her mahrams be cc'd in any e mail interactions with her.
So what you must do as soon as possible is for your parents to contact her family and set up a meeting and take things from there but you must not be in touch with her alone because shaythan is third party to your conversations and you want the full blessings from Allah in your pursuit for marriage.
With regards to Isthikhara then you must realise that isthikhara should only be performed if you are unsure about a matter. If you are certain that you want to marry this person and she is sure that she wants to marry you then isthikhara is not needed.
It is possible that at times, a person will feel a strong inclination or see a dream to carry out a certain act after performing Istikharah. However, this is not a general or necessary outcome and neither is it the main objective of Istikharah.
Also when you have so many people doing isthikhara for a matter and if one of them sees or feels a sign which they "think" is contrary to what they should be seeing or feeling then it may confuse matters further. Although you may tell your parents to make isthikhara you do not need to because this matter affects you so you should make isthikhara for yourself.
So if you think she has piety and a good character then i think you should meet her family and take things from there. Ask of Allah to do what is best for you and her and whatever happens will happen for the best.
And Allah knows best in all matters