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View Full Version : What does Islam say about relationship between brothers?



crimsontide06
11-25-2011, 10:44 PM
I have a brother who is older than me. He is really rude and hateful to our parents. He is also an atheists(says Islam is evil and barbaric), always makes comments like, "why are you praying to something that is not there". He even told a random child that God didn't create him, that the little boys parents had sex, they created him.... He makes gangster,crude sexual comments a lot. He is narcissistic and pretty bad.
He is racist and a very bad person, words cannot even describe. He has done very bad things to me, I don't want to talk about those....


I want nothing to do with him, he's dead to me. Does Islam force us to have something to do with someone who is an evil person and will not change??

I have Christian friends who are more blood to me than him. Since I live in the U.S i don't have any Muslim friends, no one near my age here that's Muslim.
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crimsontide06
11-26-2011, 06:23 PM
Anyone have any thoughts?
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Marina-Aisha
11-26-2011, 06:49 PM
i have a sister who is challenging too but you just have to have patiance with them and just pray to allah he knows best im sorry i didnt have much input but u have to trust in allah.
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crimsontide06
11-26-2011, 06:52 PM
It's ok, that sounds good...to pray for...-gulps- him(yes it's THAT bad)...but I don't think it will help him.
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Ali_008
11-27-2011, 01:46 AM
:sl:

Brother, our dear religion gives us multiple examples of relations between brothers such Haaroon & Moosa (AlayhiSalaam), Haabil & Qaabil, Ismail & Is'haaq (AlayhiSalaam), Hamza (RadhiAllahu Anhu) & Abu Talib, Hasan & Hussain (RadhiAllahu Anhuma) and Yusuf (AlayhiSalaam) & his brothers. When there are disbelieving members in the family, it does get quite intolerable and difficult to deal with them but willy-nilly you have to love them and keep inviting them to the religion of peace. When Moosa (AlayhiSalaam) had returned from Mount Sinai after receiving the revelation and found his followers lost in idol worship, he was intensely furious at his brother but he didn't break ties with him. When Qaabil killed Haabil, the latter didn't even flinch because he had outstanding faith in Allah. Ismail and Is'haaq were the righteous sons of Khaleelullah Ibrahim (peace be upon them all) and proved to be the rightful heirs of his pure and truthful legacy.

However those examples resemble compatible brothers but who can forget the treatment Yusuf (AlayhiSalaam) received from his brothers when they plotted so dangerously against him. Despite all the suffering he had to go through because of them, Yusuf displayed an outstanding example of love and forgiveness (towards his brothers) for humanity to follow for generations to come. Do you think you are even close to the problems faced by Yusuf (AlayhiSalaam)? Cutting family ties is a MAJOR SIN in Islam. Don't severe your relationship with your brother. I'm not literate enough to advice you. Hopefully, some experienced member will give you some practical solution as to how to go about maintaining your bond with him without soiling your faith, inshAllah.


format_quote Originally Posted by crimsontide06
Does Islam force us to have something to do with someone who is an evil person and will not change??
Islam does not force anything on anyone. People are free to do what they want. Either they believe and rejoice or disbelieve and doom. Since you asked, Rasoolullah (SallAllahuAlayhiWaSallam) received very harsh response from his own uncles when he started preaching Islam. He wasn't force to dawah those wicked uncles yet he never stepped back and stood strong.

Remember that there are/were always people who had to go through much much much worse than what you are going through now but they came out of it in shining colors only because they believed in Allah and remained patient & perseverant.
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crimsontide06
11-27-2011, 04:11 AM
Ok thanks for the information...Its actually him that has cut ties with us and has been very disrespectful to our parents. I'll pray for him, maybe one day he will see the truth(i doubt it)....
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tw009
11-27-2011, 04:19 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by crimsontide06
Ok thanks for the information...Its actually him that has cut ties with us and has been very disrespectful to our parents. I'll pray for him, maybe one day he will see the truth(i doubt it)....
Why do you doubt it? When you pray to Allah, you shouldn't be doubting anything. He guides whomever He wills. You need to have 100% faith in Allah. It's unlikely for your dua to be accepted when you yourself are in doubt.
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crimsontide06
11-27-2011, 06:27 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by tw009
Why do you doubt it? When you pray to Allah, you shouldn't be doubting anything. He guides whomever He wills. You need to have 100% faith in Allah. It's unlikely for your dua to be accepted when you yourself are in doubt.
I don't doubt Allah, I doubt my brother.
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Qaswa
11-30-2011, 01:00 AM
format_quote Originally Posted by crimsontide06
I don't doubt Allah, I doubt my brother.
Ask Allah with conviction. Guiding someone to the right path is with Him. If Allah chooses your brother to guide him in the right path, can your brother resist that? So it's not doubting your brother. Its the will of Allah, so pray! May Allah guide - Aameen!
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Abz2000
12-01-2011, 10:02 AM
there's different examples in Islam,
it is best to try and guide him but if you think he'll lead you astray or cause you stress then say - to you your way and to me mine,
i've got one that is an atheist too, even paid a kid to say there's no God when we went to bangladesh (another kid refused to do it, my oldest brother paid him :) ), kicked the Quran when we went to Madinah etc, almost always got into fights with him when trying to avoid disputes and he'd stand over me taunting, i have got into a fight and left the family home since:

O Prophet! Strive hard against the Unbelievers and the Hypocrites, and be firm against them. Their abode is Hell,- an evil refuge
66:9

O ye who believe! Take not my enemies and yours as friends (or protectors),- offering them (your) love, even though they have rejected the Truth that has come to you, and have (on the contrary) driven out the Prophet and yourselves (from your homes), (simply) because ye believe in Allah your Lord! If ye have come out to strive in My Way and to seek My Good Pleasure, (take them not as friends), holding secret converse of love (and friendship) with them: for I know full well all that ye conceal and all that ye reveal. And any of you that does this has strayed from the Straight Path.2. If they were to get the better of you, they would behave to you as enemies, and stretch forth their hands and their tongues against you for evil: and they desire that ye should reject the Truth.
3. Of no profit to you will be your relatives and your children on the Day of Judgment: He will judge between you: for Allah sees well all that ye do.
4. There is for you an excellent example (to follow) in Abraham and those with him, when they said to their people: "We are clear of you and of whatever ye worship besides Allah. we have rejected you, and there has arisen, between us and you, enmity and hatred for ever,- unless ye believe in Allah and Him alone": But not when Abraham said to his father: "I will pray for forgiveness for thee, though I have no power (to get) aught on thy behalf from Allah." (They prayed): "Our Lord! in Thee do we trust, and to Thee do we turn in repentance: to Thee is (our) Final Goal.
5. "Our Lord! Make us not a (test and) trial for the Unbelievers, but forgive us, our Lord! for Thou art the Exalted in Might, the Wise."
6. There was indeed in them an excellent example for you to follow,- for those whose hope is in Allah and in the Last Day. But if any turn away, truly Allah is Free of all Wants, Worthy of all Praise.
7. It may be that Allah will grant love (and friendship) between you and those whom ye (now) hold as enemies. For Allah has power (over all things); And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
Quran 60:1-7


still, we have spoken since, and if he has anything good to say - i'll talk to him or help him out - but there is the line of faith and disbelief clearly drawn between us for now.
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