Mahr and you

[Futuwwa]

I just thought it would be interesting to see what kind of mahr practices are prevalent among the membership of Islamicboard.

Married brothers: What did you give your wife as mahr?
Married sisters: What did you get as mahr from your husband?
Unmarried brothers: What do you intend to give your future wife?
Unmarried sisters: What expectations do you have regarding mahr from your future husband?

[piXie]

It depends on his financial state.

[Futuwwa]

Me, I paid off my wife's student debts.

[tigerkhan]

:sl:
in our culture, mahr in mostly paid in gold and its mostly before marriage. its ranges according to financial position of groom and bride. i am expecting maybe upto 10K US dollar.

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[ardianto]

Mahr that I've given were Al-Qur'an, sajada (prayer mat), mukena (female prayer clothes) and small amount gold and money.

Yes, the main mahr in Indonesia is Al-Qur'an. If the groom give gold and money, it's just symbolic and usually in small amount, often less than US$ 500.

There is custom difference that makes mahr in Indonesia is not as big as in Pakistan. In Pakistan, after wedding, the wife will moves to the husband's house and join the husband family.

In Indonesia, after wedding, the husband join the wife family and becomes the part of the wife family. It's means, if necessary, the husband should give contribution to the wife big family, including financial contribution. It's common in Indonesia the wife family ask financial help to the husband. So, with custom like this, of course the women and their families are thinking "why should I demand big mahr if after getting married I can demand anything to him"

[Abz2000]

Lol I am amazed!
The parents of the son give their son's hand in marriage to the bride!!!
Well at least they have less incentive to kill their daughters.

Mine was I think abt £2k and 50gms of gold
The cash turned out to shrink and the gold is worth More!!
Islamic money (gold & silver)is the best.

[ardianto]

Mine was I think abt £2k and 50gms of gold
The cash turned out to shrink and the gold is worth More!!
Islamic money (gold & silver)is the best.

So, when will you ....... :D

[UmmuShaheed]

Asalamu Alaykum,
Culturally the women recieve money, and gold.
I recieved both.
Generally it depends on his financial state, while keeping in mind its never good to place a heavy burden on anyone.

[tw009]

Is it appropriate to demand an x amount of mahr from the groom? Isn't mahr supposed to be a gift from the groom to the bride?

[ardianto]

Is it appropriate to demand an x amount of mahr from the groom? Isn't mahr supposed to be a gift from the groom to the bride?

Mahr is first gift from the husband to the wife that given by request. How much mahr is determined by the bride, not the groom. The bride can demand anything. But of course, the bride must notice the groom ability. If the groom is rich, demand big mahr is okay. But if the groom is not rich, the bride must not demand big mahr.

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Unfortunately, there are people who take advantage on this. They push their daughter to demand big mahr, because they want that mahr too. This is wrong, because mahr is the bride rights and will become property of the bride.

[Abdul Rafay]

I just thought it would be interesting to see what kind of mahr practices are prevalent among the membership of Islamicboard.

Married brothers: What did you give your wife as mahr?
Married sisters: What did you get as mahr from your husband?
Unmarried brothers: What do you intend to give your future wife?
Unmarried sisters: What expectations do you have regarding mahr from your future husband?

uhh two hundred dollars/...khalass