I think I found two disease in my heart but I don't know how to cure them or need dua

I think what I am doing now is being like that flying eagle in the air and looking with eagle and magnified eye on myself and see the faults and disease and find ways to eradicate them or better yet try not to keep growing them in hopes they will be eventually replaced with good human character and good heart. One I find when today (I live in Canada) I went to IGA and was buying some grocery items from the store. As I was heading to the cashier I saw a woman in the cashier was talking to this other woman in front of the exit of the store door. She was stealing meat and there was an entire scene, they where calling the security, the thief ran with bags worth of meat and people where looking and seeing and here I was laughing and enjoying the scene as if it is a TV show. I was like is there a popcorn to watch this...now I know this is a very sick disease. What I don't want are people to jump on me and beat me on a stick...I know it is very bad character and shows much in my heart that is why I hate it...and that is why I want to eradicate this horrible character in me. I don't want that in me...how do I go about changing? What if a case like this happens.....or something similar like a car accident...is there a Dua I can make to help me eradicate this disease from my heart? What can I do from my end beside the Dua (that does not mean I do not want to know the Dua). Maybe perhaps this is one of the symptoms of many bad disease in my heart that is effecting my iman, if I remove this from inside of me...I will increase more in iman and this is something I am striving for. No longer want to let this go...I want to be like a mechanic that goes under the car hood and repair the dirt underneath the car and fix any problem.

The other problem I want to know if I should be worried about and how to repent from it and not repeat it again...there is a software from islamicfinder.org called the Athan and it announces Athan during the appropriate time of prayer. In one Athan particular my mom and brother does not like the sound of the guy when he announce it...it is a program, software in my computer using .wav file. So they (my mom and brother) where commenting on how horrible he sounds when he makes the Athan and they where making comments and my brother he was making faces...I tried very hard not to laugh but I laughed a little and tried from the inside so hard to stop and set a serious face..but the face my brother made was funny...even now gives me a little giggle..but I am trying not to laugh or giggle as I am typing this. Did I do any Kufr on this and how do I fix this problem from not happening again?

Thanks in advance.

i know exactly how it is, unfortunately.

i realise pretty d**mn quick its not me.

and the feeling passes. or sometimes id say something like, har har funny guy... and you'd hear it like "im an AHole"

maybe you should open a grocery shop or something.

...or be very poor.

anyway you have every right to enjoy other peoples stupidity.


i dont really know, im not saying dont laugh. because the absurdity of most situations makes you just want to point out how ridiculous things are.

to be fair if you didnt laugh, would it change anything?




anyway people randomly say astakfur'allah all the time.

and its an appropriate response imo.


also dont talk during adhan. it might catch on.

xboxisdead said:

Did I do any Kufr on this and how do I fix this problem from not happening again?

Click to expand...

I read some of your previous posts. Brother, I think you may have some sort of waswasa (scruples) about kufr thoughts, as many believers may have it one way or the other. I hope this link will be helpful. I myself benefited a lot from this article.

http://www.islamicboard.com/general/134321328-how-get-rid-waswasa-scruples.html

Ma'assalam!

Bro xboxisdead,

you've recognised the problem, and you already know how to deal with it... in a word, "control".

So, you're already half way there imo... the rest is up to the amount of sincere effrot you put into your own "self".

I hope you can understand the simplicity of it. No need to complicate matters, sophistication is way too over-rated. Truth.

Scimi

If this is a part of your character, then it is sorted out in spending time in charity, and looking at the fact that there are things that are not funny. Things happen which people would ordinarily laugh at ie women wishing to give a lion a hug and got attacked-this is peoples' stupidity. But laughing at other people's misfortune when they are victims of stealing, and laughing at a Man who gave up his time to do the adhan, then this is wrong, when he has put effort and so much work into.

This is the test-Allah doesn't make you good in a second as then what is they point of earning our rewards and showing to Allah what we are capable of?? It is you that needs to continue to support and help other people (were we are living in a society that has become more self-centred), were you come to a stage that its not funny to see the misfortune of others. So if you think by reading a prayer and you will be changed straightaway (it can happen), but you need to work at it, and the way to GOOD MANNERS WHICH IS THE ISSUE is using them, and showing kindness to others and meaning what you say and not at face value ie just saying things that people wish to hear. People apply themselves. This is why we have to earn our reward, if Allah just stopped all the bad things that people do in this world, then how shall we be tested, to see what we are capable of?? The focus as above is to think more about what other people go through, and helping them out and HAVE good manners (instead of just showing them at times were you see fit).