Capturing your husbands heart

[ukhti_zahra]

A marriage can be successful when the couple are compatible and united. Without this, their lives will be incomplete and troubled. It is therefore imperative that every wife does her level best to learn the method of capturing her husband’s heart. Without learning this method she can never be successful irrespective of how educated, attractive or wealthy she may be.

Wise people have mentioned many methods of harnessing one’s husband’s love. A woman who regards serving her husband and loving him as an important aspect of her Imaan has no option but to practise the guidelines which will be mentioned hereunder. Regard your husband as a wealthy man even though he may be poor.

Consult with him in all matters and do as he advises.
Never do anything against his wishes and always give precedence to the things that please him.
Always be concerned about his peace of mind and never do anything that will cause him grief.
Accept whatever he gives you with a happy heart.
Do whatever he asks you to do in a manner that he is left without a worry.
Always be happy and smiling so that all his worries can disappear merely by looking at you.
Fulfil his needs before your own.
Feed him as best as you can.
If he cannot afford to buy clothes, sew them yourself.
Try to do everything by yourself.
Never ask him for something that he cannot afford otherwise he will be saddened if he cannot give it to you. If you are destined to have it, you will surely get it without asking.

Do not ask him to do anything that you can do by yourself.

Never tell him all your problems as soon as he arrives because his mind may already be inundated with other problems.

Speak of good things while eating because when a person is happy, even the simplest meal is as tasty as the best delicacy. On the other hand, a delicious meal will seem dull to a troubled mind. When a woman begins telling her husband all her day’s problems as soon as he walks in, his eating, sitting and resting will become difficult. In fact, he may even lose his appetite. Together with upsetting him, such behaviour is also displeasing to Allaah.
If Allaah grants you the ability, assist him in his work.

Share his problems and console him whenever he has a problem so that the burden may be raised from his shoulders.When he is in debt, assist him to settle it by earning some money without violating the laws of the Shari'ah. If you have somemoney of your own or some jewellery that can be sold, give this
to him if he needs it so that he may appreciate the fact that he is more valuable to you than these things. Never remind him about
such favours afterwards and do not even make an effort to remember such things.

Never neglect your duties to him and always do things that are in his best interests. Try to do all your housework by yourself. Insha Allaah, Allaah will soon show you easier days. Spend as little as possible and try to save as much as you can. If your savings are meagre, never stop saving with the thought that it is too little. Whatever you save will come in handy during rainy days because when days are dark friends are always few. You will
then be saved from the humiliation of stretching your hands out in front of others. Your husband will then be amazed at your prudence and farsightedness.

Sew your clothing by yourself, cook by yourself and look after the children by yourself. Reply gently when he asks a question.

Be gentle when he is angry.Continue fulfilling his rights even if he is unhappy with the wayyou do things. This will please Allaah swt
Do your share even though it may be difficult.
Be content with whatever he is content with.
Spend his wealth with care and with a conscience.

Whatever your husband brings home is in your care. You may either apply your inventiveness and capabilities to make your home valuable or you could behave like a slovenly and lazy wife by laying everything to waste. Your poor husband will have no say in the matter. Your home is what you make of it. A skilled and capable wife is never distressed. Everyone seeks refuge from a disorderly and chaotic home.

Although difficulties will arise from time to time, sometimes depriving you of food and rest, you must make an effort to keep the house in order because a man will not be able to bear a chaotic home for long. When he cannot find peace and rest at home, he will be forced to find it elsewhere. He may then begin to regard his home and his children as calamities.

A good wife is always making an effort for her home to be an example of Jannah. Together with herself being at ease in her home, she does her best to make every occupant of the house comfortable as well.

Men appreciate women who are competent and who are able to organise affairs well. It is unfortunate that many beautiful women lack these qualities and have thus become worthless in the eyes of their husbands. It should be borne in mind that most men appreciate inner beauty more than outer beauty. Irrespective of how unattractive or imprudent a woman may be, she will certainly win over her husband’s affections if she is obedient.

It is not difficult for every wife to apply all the above principles in her life, thereby earning the devoted love of her husband. However, it is tragic that most women fail to understand this and wrongly think that they will be able to force their husbands into submission by behaving harshly and temperamentally. It is really the women who strive to please Allaah and who serve their husbands with love and gentleness who become the beloved of their husbands and whose husbands would give their lives for them. The husbands of such women will do anything to please them and are proud of them. Such couples are the
ones who live happily ever after.

Intelligent women avail themselves of such behaviour while foolish women are deprived of it. As an intelligent woman you should always bear the following in mind:

Forsake your egotism and your temperamental behaviour.
Do not allow pride and selfishness to approach you.
Do not speak to a strange man in private.
Do not speak ill of your husband in front of another.
Do not breathe a word against him.
Do not eat before him.
Do not discuss matters that do not appeal to him.

You can even win over a temperamental husband by diligently serving him. Be as he wants you to be and do what pleases him.
Keep his secrets safe within your heart.
Beautify yourself as he prefers.
Stay away from the company of evil and ill-mannered women.

By keeping all the above in mind and practising accordingly, you will enjoy good fortune and your husband will be yours forever.


- A Gift For Muslim Bride By Shaykh Muhammad Haneef Abdul Majeed