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YM Usrah Umar
10-28-2013, 10:20 PM
salam, i would need some help brothers and sisters...plz do help me

you see i am engaged currently, but the girl im gettin married with i have 2 issues.

1) she has reminded that she wears taweez, she did mention back when we were getting to know each othr but it had slipped out of my mind until she mentioned it last week...according to her it says shahadah but i know so much about taweez that its too much of a risk to wear

2) she does wear hijab but it isnt a camel hump hijab but it is slightly big...i cant really describe it in all honesty but its slightly big on top, she is very modest however mashallah

you see before it did slightly bother me but only it has bothered me even more because my family members have started to talk about her hijab more often and they too have said it is quite big. i had the mindframe of she aint perfect but il help her with her deen as she will help me with mine as we are married.

i have spoken to her about these issues but she gets defensive, its understandable...my best friend wore a taweez for quite some time and i was giving him advice on not wearing it but he wasnt having it but recently mashallah hes got rid of it.

any help brothers and sisters you can give?

jazaks
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tigerkhan
10-29-2013, 02:00 AM
:sl:
about tahweez i can tell u, it very common in indo pak region and most of scholar of area don't blv it as shirk.
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Muslim Woman
10-29-2013, 03:10 AM
:wa:


u may present her the hijab of ur choices . In'sha Allah she would love that to wear.


As bro already said , taweej is common and some / many believe if it contains Allah's name , Sura from Quran , then it's allowed.


And Allah Knows Best.
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ardianto
10-29-2013, 03:14 PM
Originally Posted by YM Usrah Umar
she does wear hijab but it isnt a camel hump hijab but it is slightly big...i cant really describe it in all honesty but its slightly big on top, she is very modest however mashallah
Slightly big hijab?. Still better than don't wear hijab. :)

This is not a problem. I guess, soon or later after she sees another style of hijab that look more attractive, she will change her hijab style.

Brother, do not make little matter like this become a big problem that make you doubt to marry her because probably she is the best woman that you can get.

About taweez. You can tell her softly and smoothly after you married her. Not now because now is better you prepare your marriage. It's not easy to tell someone to leave taweez. You will need patience.
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~Zaria~
10-29-2013, 06:19 PM
Originally Posted by YM Usrah Umar
salam, i would need some help brothers and sisters...plz do help me

you see i am engaged currently, but the girl im gettin married with i have 2 issues.

1) she has reminded that she wears taweez, she did mention back when we were getting to know each othr but it had slipped out of my mind until she mentioned it last week...according to her it says shahadah but i know so much about taweez that its too much of a risk to wear

2) she does wear hijab but it isnt a camel hump hijab but it is slightly big...i cant really describe it in all honesty but its slightly big on top, she is very modest however mashallah

you see before it did slightly bother me but only it has bothered me even more because my family members have started to talk about her hijab more often and they too have said it is quite big. i had the mindframe of she aint perfect but il help her with her deen as she will help me with mine as we are married.

i have spoken to her about these issues but she gets defensive, its understandable...my best friend wore a taweez for quite some time and i was giving him advice on not wearing it but he wasnt having it but recently mashallah hes got rid of it.

any help brothers and sisters you can give?

jazaks

:salam:


There are differences in opinion regarding the use of taweez.
Depending on the contents of the taweez and ones intention, it is considered permissible by a number of scholars.
Please read the following advises from a hanafi perspective:

http://www.askimam.org/public/question_detail/18505

http://www.askimam.org/public/question_detail/15796


With regards to the sister wearing a hijab that resembles a 'camels hump':

I think we should consider the fact that we will never find a spouse who is 'perfect' in every manner, as we are all human and we are prone to err.

Also, for those who are making an effort in developing their imaan - will realize that taqwa does not develop over-night.
While some people may be fortunate to be raised in very religious/ practicing families, for others, imaan and taqwa may evolve and develop over time.

So, if the sister is making an effort to wear hijab, and is of good character, then in shaa Allah, do not be too hard/ judgmental - as in a similar manner, she will also be able to find faults with yourself.....and in this case, no-body will ever get married! : )

In cases where we are facing important decisions in life, such as marriage, turn to Allah and seek His guidance - through istikhaarah salaah.

Truly, it is only Allah who knows what the future holds for each of us.
It may be, that the women who is observing proper hijab/ niqab today, may change in the future, or turn out to be a very difficult person to live with.
While it may be possible that the person who is not yet wearing full hijab - but is trying, and she is making sincere efforts in the right direction - may turn out to be a great lover of Allah and His prophet (sallalahu alaihi wasalam).

So, ask of Allah to guide you in this matter, and place your trust in His plans for your life.


May Allah bless you with a loving, faithful and compatible marriage, that will be the means of strengthening your imaan and gaining janaatul firdous.
Ameen.

:wa:
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