Muslim parents in the west

[Fainoz]

I noticed a lot of parents have this issue where they do not want their kids to practice islam more or less than they do. if you do less you are corrupt but more and you are extreme. you leave the house without hijab, its bad but leave with niqab you're an extremist. I know my family would never agree with me wearing niqab, and my friends mother actually prevented from doing so. Even though both of our families are somewhat practicing. Why is this? is it because we are afraid of becoming better people? Everyone seems to follow this unwritten rule of "be a good muslim but not too good"

[greenhill]

Never thought about it that way.

I think it is perceived societal pressure in the works here. While as muslims we want to practice but we are unsure what is moderation? It is hard to fathom.

I guess the 'parents' want us to fit in with the society without appearing to be to extremist.

Why? I haven't a clue...


Peace :shade:

[Abz2000]

The answer to why is often because many of our parents knew nothing about the land they moved to and felt the need to adapt and assimilate, also their knowledge of Islam was limited to knowing how to read the Quran in Arabic worth no understanding of its meaning or message, and praying five times with no clue as to what they were chanting. The best method of survival given the scenario was to blend in.

HOWEVER - we now live in an age where communication is no obstacle and availability of education is at the fingertips, the new breed are able to know and feel the truth and want to live it, they have no qualms about mixing hijab with nikes, or education with family life, and are able to confidently project themselves forward with no worry about what those lost in the dark think. They are also not limited to the tv and it's constant propaganda trying to make them feel inferior. And language barriers can also create feelings of inadequacy.

Think about it like this, how many of our parents had access to the fatwas of a million muftis, and how many of them spent hours on Islamic forums discussing Islam?
Not mine, but MashaAllah they somehow held on to their faith defensively and passed the ball onto this new generation which is on the offensive, May Allah fill their graves with light and reward them with the best. Because I for one don't think I could have held on for long with the limited knowledge they coped with.

MashaAllah the push for khilafah comes at the best time it could ever have appeared. And Allah is full of wisdom and exalted in might.

When the Mahdi appears, Allah will cause such power of vision and hearing to be manifested in believers that the Mahdi will call to the whole world from where he is, with no postman involved, and they will [B]hear and even see him[B].

Sony | Sound & Vision - Delivering A Better Deal - Sound and Vision

In the time of the Mahdi, a Muslim in the East will be able to see his Muslim brother in the West, and he in the West will see him in the East.[26]

Viber takes its battle against Skype to Windows 8


When matters are entrusted to competent [the Mahdi], Almighty God will raise the lowest part of the world for him, and lower the highest places. So much that he will see the whole world as if in the palm of his hand. Which of you cannot see even a single hair in the palm of his hand?

Lol, makes me think of satellites and smartphones, google earth with pan tilt & zoom and Skype.
A golden age of knowledge and information.

Assalamu Alaikum,

Have you read verse 82 of chapter 17. الإسراء in the Holy Quran?

وَنُنَزِّلُ مِنَ القُرءانِ ما هُوَ شِفاءٌ وَرَحمَةٌ لِلمُؤمِنينَ ۙ وَلا يَزيدُ الظّٰلِمينَ إِلّا خَسارًا

English-YusufAli translation
______________________________

We send down (stage by stage) in the Qur\'an that which is a healing and a mercy to those who believe: to the unjust it causes nothing but loss after loss.

Sent using alQuran. http://iphone.almubin.com/alQuran

[AsheSkyler]

People are just entirely too caught up with appearances. I had a similar problem when I was in church. If you wore loose clothes, had long hair, and didn't wear makeup, you were that extremist that beat people with a Bible and an acute fear of computers. But if you wore very tight and revealing clothing, with heavy makeup and just-so hair, you were a hussy. Same thing with Muslims. You can have a hijab or beard, but don a niqab or a taqiyah and you've got a bomb squad dog sniffing your heels. You can say whatever insane or bawdy stuff you want, just so long as you don't look like what they think an extremist or floozy looks like. What does it really matter how a person chooses to dress so long as they're clean, comfortable, and not hurting anybody? Don't people often say that it's what's in your heart that really matters?

Vanity aside, I guess some people might think loose and comfortable clothing is good for hiding weapons or for stealing stuff. It's easy to hide a gun or knife, or sneak away several packs of hotdogs, when you don't wear tight clothing. Some schools have banned trench coats because of highschool shootings and not many people can wear baggy pants into a grocery store without security keeping an eye on them. Not much of an excuse though when it's friends and family telling you how to dress.

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[faithandpeace]

The Western world is very obsessed with looks and it is very sickening. Even if you save the lives of one thousand children what is valued more is how you look on TV when you are interviewed about it. Subhanallah.

[~Zaria~]

I noticed a lot of parents have this issue where they do not want their kids to practice islam more or less than they do. if you do less you are corrupt but more and you are extreme. you leave the house without hijab, its bad but leave with niqab you're an extremist. I know my family would never agree with me wearing niqab, and my friends mother actually prevented from doing so. Even though both of our families are somewhat practicing. Why is this? is it because we are afraid of becoming better people? Everyone seems to follow this unwritten rule of "be a good muslim but not too good"

:sl: sister,


Most often this is due to lack of knowledge or an incomplete understanding of these aspects of Islam.

Unfortunately, for many muslims who have been born and raised in islam, their active seeking of deeni knowledge largely ends once they have left islamic classes/ madressah, whilst the pursuit of worldly knowledge continues unabated.

When this occurs, then our 'level' of practicing/ observance of our deen does not magnify, but remains fairly constant over the years.
In this way, there develops a sense of complacency - that if we are performing the bare minimum that is expected of us (and very often, this too is lacking), then there is no real desire to transcend towards a deeper connection with Allah by means of making an effort in practicing all that is sunnah and as much nafl/ optional acts of ibaadat as well.

In other words, it is very easy to 'stagnate' in our ways - if we do not make sincere and active efforts to become better servants of Allah, than we were the day before.

With knowledge comes understanding of the deen, love and recognition for Allah and His Rasul (sallalahu alaihi wasalam) - and with this, a desire to make every action a means of gaining the pleasure of Allah.
^ At this point, we will not only focus on what is 'fardh'/ compulsory.....because our goal will become Allah Himself, and His pleasure.

So, when people tell you not to observe certain acts of ibaadat in islam - be it your family, or anyone else - try to understand that everyone is on a different 'wave-length' or level of imaan at a particular point in time. This is not fixed, and so there is hope for everyone to become true Wallis of Allah, if this desire is ignited in their hearts.

Have patience, and try to direct them to the reasons why such an act of worship is important in islam - e.g. read to them/ provide them with an article explaining the position of the niqaab, or perhaps let them listen to a lecture on the subject by a scholar.

In this way, at the very least, it will result in awareness and may dispel any misunderstandings they may have had about the subject.
This it the most that you can do - to provide the info. and then make duaa that Allah opens their hearts to the truth and to His guidance.

For your own part, let the intention for your every action be: Seeking the Pleasure of Allah alone - and in this way, in shaa Allah, the whole world can unite to try to stop you from your path, but they will fail - so long as you remain strong and steadfast in your convictions.


May Allah bless us all with His guidance and forgive us for our shortcomings.
Ameen.


:wa: