New Muslim Problems. (Rant)

[AmericanMuslim]

Salaam Alaikum, everyone! Praise be to Allah, May he keep us all on the Straight Path. Ameen.

Every since I became a Muslim (Alhamdulillah), I have been nervous telling others that I have converted to Islam. Mostly because I am afraid that they will reject me, or not take me seriously. So recently, I had the courage to tell a Muslim friend of mine that I converted to Islam. The reaction was not as bad as I had expected, Alhamdulillah. He just said 'Okay. If you need help with anything, let me know.' So I asked him if he would go to a Masjid with me, because I would feel awkward if I went alone. He then challenged my decision of becoming a Muslim, and he doesn't believe that I really am going to be a Muslim. I have not only got that from him, but I have got that from Muslim women whenever I go around downtown in my hijab. They have glared at me, stared at me in the most judgmental way, and made me feel uncomfortable. I know of other American and British women who face the same problems. One woman tried to go a Masjid to pray, but she was harassed by the Imam because of 'the way she wore her hijab', (It was worn like any other Muslimah) and he said that she wasn't 'wearing the correct shoes' (She was wearing regular sneakers) and she was basically chased away from the Masjid. She never even made it inside.
Why do Muslims do this? I do realize not all Muslims do, but why do a lot of them do this? We shouldn't be doing this to converts who want to convert to Islam. We should be welcoming them, making them feel comfortable, show them how to pray, and things like that. We shouldn't be chasing them away because of their past, race, or nationality. We should be welcoming them like an old family member who went away for a while.

Okay. Rant over. For converts: What are some New Muslim Problems you are facing, or had faced?

[BeTheChange]

Walaikumasalaam




Welcome to the forum - your very very welcome here Alhamdulilah - i hope you continue to stay with us for a very long time in sha Allah & Alhamdulilah & congrats for finding the truth.


May Allah swa continue to guide you to the right path Ameen.


I know as human beings we do want to be accepted - especially by those who we love dearly i.e. families & friends. I think it's important to know that at the time yes it's very important but in the long term other people's opinions of us won't aid us. If we do anything we should have the intention of doing it for Allah swa.


It's very worrying/upsetting to read that an Imam chased your friend away?! And for wearing the wrong shoes/trainers?? I know all masjids do encourage you to take your shoes/slippers etc off because your entering a place of worship which needs to be clean but i have never heard of prohibited trainers that you can't wear. The only thing which is not acceptable is if you have an image of a living creature on the item of clothing...Am not sure what happened here if am honest.


Please don't let this experience put you off. Have you tried visiting another local masjid? I know in my community and where am from we are always keen to help newbies and are very eager to hear their experience and journey (in the hope of refreshing our emaan & gaining easy rewards etc).


Am so sorry you feel neglected by the Muslim community - if you need anything feel free to PM me anytime and i'll be happy to help in sha Allah.


Also, when you have time you can also visit this site http://www.kalamullah.com/new-muslims.html

I hope your journey gets easier and if it doesn't - it may be hard at first but in sha Allah you will find ways to overcome the challenges Ameen.

May Allah swa protect you from all known and unknown evil Ameen.

[AmericanMuslim]

Salaam!
Thank you so much. :) The girl was not a friend of mine, but it also bothers me about what happened. I don't know if there is any back story to what happened, I only heard from her on her account. All I know is that the Imam was out of line, and it bothers me that converts are being treated in this matter. You also reminded me of an important thing: Only do things to please Allah. And that actually makes me feel a lot better, so thank you for your support. May Allah (SWT) protect you from the evil, and keep you on the straight path. Ameen. :)

[BeTheChange]

Walaikumasalaam


Yeah your 100% right noone should be treated in that manner - new Muslim or old Muslim it's completely unacceptable to be chased away from a masjid - if anything the imam's role is to encourage people to the masjid!


Ameen to your duas sis!


Yeah i think when we live in this world sometimes we do forget our purpose and what we are here for. Our main aim is to focus on ourselves. So if this particular masjid is preventing you from getting closer to Allah swa find another alternative masjid.


We shouldn't stop at the first hurdle/challenege. We have to continue striving until we return to Allah swa. As long as we are in control of ourselves and can live and be true to ourselves then we will have inner peace.


May Allah swa help you and don't forget to check the above link. You'll definitely find it worth your time! In sha Allah

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[Snow]

One woman tried to go a Masjid to pray, but she was harassed by the Imam because of 'the way she wore her hijab', (It was worn like any other Muslimah) and he said that she wasn't 'wearing the correct shoes' (She was wearing regular sneakers) and she was basically chased away from the Masjid. She never even made it inside.
Why do Muslims do this? I do realize not all Muslims do, but why do a lot of them do this? We shouldn't be doing this to converts who want to convert to Islam. We should be welcoming them, making them feel comfortable, show them how to pray, and things like that. We shouldn't be chasing them away because of their past, race, or nationality. We should be welcoming them like an old family member who went away for a while.

Okay. Rant over. For converts: What are some New Muslim Problems you are facing, or had faced?

That is sad.
I never get it when some muslims are judgemental towards non-muslims or even fellow muslims.
If you are a true muslim, you must believe that each person has to answer to his/her decisions.
Why should I get upset about other peoples decision if it does not directly affect me?

Even if I should see a fellow muslim make some bad choice, it is not up to me to tell them what is right or wrong - unless they are asking for an advice.

And where should it stop? Should I get upset that someone is eating bacon, because I don't?
That is just my choise and I believe that I will have to answer for my choices later on.


I guess where I am going with my own rant is that people should lead their own life and not judge others too much.

[Moshy]

Salaam Alaikum, everyone! Praise be to Allah, May he keep us all on the Straight Path. Ameen.

Every since I became a Muslim (Alhamdulillah), I have been nervous telling others that I have converted to Islam. Mostly because I am afraid that they will reject me, or not take me seriously. So recently, I had the courage to tell a Muslim friend of mine that I converted to Islam. The reaction was not as bad as I had expected, Alhamdulillah. He just said 'Okay. If you need help with anything, let me know.' So I asked him if he would go to a Masjid with me, because I would feel awkward if I went alone. He then challenged my decision of becoming a Muslim, and he doesn't believe that I really am going to be a Muslim. I have not only got that from him, but I have got that from Muslim women whenever I go around downtown in my hijab. They have glared at me, stared at me in the most judgmental way, and made me feel uncomfortable. I know of other American and British women who face the same problems. One woman tried to go a Masjid to pray, but she was harassed by the Imam because of 'the way she wore her hijab', (It was worn like any other Muslimah) and he said that she wasn't 'wearing the correct shoes' (She was wearing regular sneakers) and she was basically chased away from the Masjid. She never even made it inside.
Why do Muslims do this? I do realize not all Muslims do, but why do a lot of them do this? We shouldn't be doing this to converts who want to convert to Islam. We should be welcoming them, making them feel comfortable, show them how to pray, and things like that. We shouldn't be chasing them away because of their past, race, or nationality. We should be welcoming them like an old family member who went away for a while.

Okay. Rant over. For converts: What are some New Muslim Problems you are facing, or had faced?

Welcome to the forum. Inshallah you will find it useful.

sir, the part you said that the woman was not welcomed in the mosque due to sneakers, is extremism and disliked in islam. There is nothing wrong with sneakers.

[eesa the kiwi]

don't let this put you off islam
keep trying things do get easier
you'll feel a lot better when you have a good support network built up but that takes time to build
i'm revert myself and i'm on the other side of the world from you but we get similar problems here

[Umm Abed]

Wa alaikum salam sister, Im sorry to hear that you have to go through all this, Allah will judge these people who have given you such a hard time.

The harder the challenge the greater the reward, remember that, so you'r always a winner insha'allah :)

May Allah make it easy for you and keep you strong.

[M.I.A.]

Women should cover there head.. Anything after that is just being an idiot.

Bet half the guys there come with different coloured topees..hats.

And trainers.

Please don't get me wrong, any item of clothing can be worn improperly..

But I'm not going to question your fashion sense.

Same as with the guys, how often the imam has to say.. Please wear belts so the people behind you have a nicer time when you prostrate..

Too often.

I'd like to say things get easier but no matter how much better you get..

Ultimately you are at the mercy of others.

Its a learning experience. I hope you find good companionship.

Where I live there are at least five or six mosques within a mile of each other.

[Insaanah]

Women should cover there head.. Anything after that is just being an idiot.

Brother, please be careful about what you're saying. There is evidence from the hadeeth that covering the face is obligatory, and that is the view of a number of scholars, and even many of those that don't consider it obligatory, consider it highly recommended. The niqaab has always been part and parcel of Islam. Please don't call your sisters who choose to wear it idiots, when they may well be more beloved to Allah than any of us.

And Allah knows best.

[Scimitar]

Also, hijaab is more than just the covering of the hair - it is the covering of the aura of a woman. This covers much of her body.

Scimi

[Karl]

Just wear a burka and no Muslim will dare to mess with you. Muslim men are paranoid of white women because they may think they are a feminist infiltrator trying to turn their women against them. Which happens quite a lot these days. The infidels even have African and Asian apostates to spread that Marxist poison.

[ardianto]

Salaam Alaikum, everyone! Praise be to Allah, May he keep us all on the Straight Path. Ameen.

Every since I became a Muslim (Alhamdulillah), I have been nervous telling others that I have converted to Islam. Mostly because I am afraid that they will reject me, or not take me seriously. So recently, I had the courage to tell a Muslim friend of mine that I converted to Islam. The reaction was not as bad as I had expected, Alhamdulillah. He just said 'Okay. If you need help with anything, let me know.' So I asked him if he would go to a Masjid with me, because I would feel awkward if I went alone. He then challenged my decision of becoming a Muslim, and he doesn't believe that I really am going to be a Muslim. I have not only got that from him, but I have got that from Muslim women whenever I go around downtown in my hijab. They have glared at me, stared at me in the most judgmental way, and made me feel uncomfortable. I know of other American and British women who face the same problems. One woman tried to go a Masjid to pray, but she was harassed by the Imam because of 'the way she wore her hijab', (It was worn like any other Muslimah) and he said that she wasn't 'wearing the correct shoes' (She was wearing regular sneakers) and she was basically chased away from the Masjid. She never even made it inside.
Why do Muslims do this? I do realize not all Muslims do, but why do a lot of them do this? We shouldn't be doing this to converts who want to convert to Islam. We should be welcoming them, making them feel comfortable, show them how to pray, and things like that. We shouldn't be chasing them away because of their past, race, or nationality. We should be welcoming them like an old family member who went away for a while.

Okay. Rant over. For converts: What are some New Muslim Problems you are facing, or had faced?

:wa:

If a White or Japanese convert to Islam and then visit a masjid in Indonesia, he/she would be welcomed very well. Not because his/her race, but because he/she came from non-Muslim societies, so he/she was regarded as muhajir (someone who do hijrah). And if a convert woman hasn't wear hijab, then the Imam wife would give her hijab. She would not be denied to enter masjid because if she could not entered masjid then she would go to masjid anymore.

But I am not surprised if a White convert in the West face problems like described in the quoted post above. I often read news and stories about Muslims in the West and I often found cases like these. But actually it's caused by mindset which really affected by culture.

[Abdullahh]

I understand your frustration. I myself am quite reluctant to tell people in real life that I am Muslim, much less actually go to a Masjid. I look "White" and was a White supremacist at one time (which was incredibly stupid for many reasons one of them being that I am partially of an ethnicity that many consider to be Middle Eastern). Anyways, Islam is supposed to bring people together of all races, ethnic backgrounds and so forth but is often not the case due to some ignorant Muslims (not all of us are perfect). I say don't let it get you down, because I never expected all Muslims to be the nicest and best people and you shouldn't either. There will always be ignorance everywhere. The good news is that most Muslims will support you and not treat you like this. Wishing you good luck, sis.

[Lisa921]

salaam alaykum sister,
Congratulations on accepting Islam.
Sorry you have had such disparaging remarks to endure.
I hope it gets better from now.
All I can say is that you need to focus on you and do not worry about what other people say and do. Muslims are not perfect, Islam is. Take your faith from our book and our messenger and leave the rest that worries you. It will be alright.
You need time to adjust before you worry about if you should tell anyone. That will come in time. Religion is a very personal decision for us all and some people do not even like talking about what faith they are. This is true if you are muslim, christian, jewish or any faith.
In islam we have the gift to be able to talk directly to God/Allah in our prayers so take refuge in that from your worries and forget the rest.
I hope things get better for you.
Prayers for you.
Lisa

[Lisa921]

Same as with the guys, how often the imam has to say.. Please wear belts so the people behind you have a nicer time when you prostrate..

Too often.

hmm Men have a hijab too. That is to cover what is between their navel and their knees with a long tunic. If men followed this and actually wore shirts long enough to cover their private parts then you would not have this problem. I feel sorry for you brother.
Salaam
Lisa

[M.I.A.]

Lol and so you should, I sit at the back.

...although I don't make the complaints.


Anyway I understand you, it's a nice manner of dressing but sometimes impractical.

Its mostly cold and raining here although I change the clothes I wear depending on if I'm working or have specific things to do..

Somebody told me of a guy that built a wall in salvar kamis and didn't get dirty..

I'm not often that lucky although I'm trying.

I still get it though, the minimum requirements should be met..

But one should not be offended by the leeway offered as long as it is not misused..

A lot of people still do the naval to knees thing in India I suppose..

And I have experience in knowing women who cover themselves fully.. Its not a problem for me.

At the same time I have met a lot of ladies from Malaysia that seem to do a good job of remaining moderate and modest.

..I guess my first post was getting me a little bothered..almost irate lol..

You are right about covering the aura though, I really need to be more specific.. And will remember next time.

[Dawud1996]

Walaikumasalaam

Welcome sister.

Its sad that other sisters look down upon you, a Muslim has to be humble and helpful. But you shouldn't care what others think.

[Lady A]

:wa:

Congratulations on your conversion to Islam. You entered the way of life of Islam with a determined heart and all your past sins are forgiven *jealous* May Allah reward you for your acceptance and struggles, Ameen.

I feel terribly awful for the discrimination against you and all new Muslim converts. I pray it becomes easier for your and you become wiser from it.

:offtopic: Will it be your first Ramadhan this year?

[sister herb]

Salam alaykum

It sounds very strange if other muslims don´t accept revert muslims. In my city I haven´t had similar problems at all. I feel that everyone knows me here (also those I don´t know) as they are born muslims and immigrants and I am revert but born in this country. When I have visited in the mosque and met new sisters, they many times say as "is this that sister everybody have talked???!" Sometimes it feels quite :embarrass But they are very kind to me, advice me with the Quran and Arabic and respect me as their sister. My wardrobe is full of hijabs I have got as gifts from my sisters. :p I have worked also as teacher of language and helped many my sisters and brothers, so this too might affect to their behavior as many of them comes from the cultures where the teacher is very respected person. Ramadan is nice time here to me - many sisters invite me to share iftar with them and as I am quite good in the kitchen, I will bring some little sweets to them... nice chat with sisters. :D