:bism:
:sl:
Hi, sis! Wonderful and a very warm welcome to IB!
I used to be an atheist/agnostic too. So, I can relate in some way with you.
The way you begin your life as a reverted Muslim is to take things extremely slow and at your pace being patient with yourself while also being sincere in your journey. For example, I consider myself a student of knowledge, and I'd like to keep learning from the cradle to the grave as Prophet
sallalahu alayhi wasallam (peace and blessings be upon him) encouraged us to do.
Since you're a minor, you should definitely keep your Islam secret until you feel comfortable enough to be open about Islam; early Muslims, I'm afraid, had do the same for fear of persecution.
Personally, I find Islam beautiful, and I love the fact there's no extremism in the religion, though there are some extremists that would have you believe otherwise, and you should therefore be extremely careful from whom you take your knowledge as extremism leads a person astray. Also, this journey is a personal one and one about your connectivity to Allah
SubhanAllah wa Taala (Glorious and Exalted is God) and to Prophet
sallalahu alayhi wasallam (peace and blessings be upon him). If I were with you, I'd read these two books,
Muhammad: His Life Based on the Earliest Sources by author Martin Lings and
Love for Allah by Zulfiqar Ahmad, as they will help you gain the knowledge that you require and also improve your spiritual connection to God
In-sha-Allah (God-willing).
Also, as a start, I think you should learn to say,"Subhaan-Allaah wa’l-hamdu Lillaah wa laa ilaaha ill-Allaah wa Allaahu akbar wa laa hawla wa la quwwata illa Billaah which means, "Glory be to Allaah, praise be to Allaah, there is no god except Allaah and Allaah is Most great, there is no god except Allaah and there is no power and no strength except with Allaah." And as
dua (supplication to God), you should learn to say, "Allaahumma ighfir li warhamni wahdini warzuqni wa ‘aafini", which means "O Allah, forgive me, have mercy on me, guide me, and grant me provision and good health." This is because this is the advice that Prophet
sallalahu alayhi wasallam (peace and blessings be upon him) gave to a new Muslim, and the story specifically is as follows:
It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Abi Awfa said: A man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said: “O Messenger of Allah, teach me something of the Qur’aan that will suffice me, for I cannot read.” He said, “Say: Subhaan-Allaah wa’l-hamdu Lillaah wa laa ilaaha ill-Allaah wa Allaahu akbar wa laa hawla wa la quwwata illa Billaah (Glory be to Allaah, praise be to Allaah, there is no god except Allaah and Allaah is Most great, there is no god except Allaah and there is no power and no strength except with Allaah).” The man made a grabbing gesture with his hand (indicating that he had learned a lot) and said, “This is for my Lord, what is there for me?” He said, “Say: Allaahumma ighfir li warhamni wahdini warzuqni wa ‘aafini (O Allah, forgive me, have mercy on me, guide me, and grant me provision and good health).” He made another grabbing gesture with his other hand and stood up.
To be honest, that above should be a healthy and positive start to your Islam. Also, if you have any questions or concerns or want to simply share, do not hesitate to come and talk to us, dear sister. We'd be happy to be of any service to you in any way, shape or form
In-sha-Allah (God-willing). And again, remember, baby steps. And before I forget, welcome to the family of Islam as well.
Wishing you all kinds of awesomeness and happiness and health,
:wa: