Do you ever say "sir" or "ma'am" to elders or other adults?

Just curious if anyone here does that or was taught to say that

If you do(or dont) Why? and Why not?

i always do!

i wasn't taught but just made it up. well actually i'm trying to show that i respect them and since i'm very ill-mannered it kind of covers it up a little.(my language is really bad, so if i miss it, its as if i'm ...........my accent is more of the thugs that hit the streets everyday ...for basketball!)

or mostly, particularly use it if i'm asking something, like i'm damn sure they'll be so mad at me. or like i'm trying to explain something to them...something like that.

I have never in my life called someone 'sir' or 'ma'am'. :hmm:

With Asians or Arabs, I would call them Uncle or Aunty, with people of other ethnicities, if they are my parents' age, I say Mr, Miss, Mrs.

I find it very embarassing to call my relatives "ma'am" or something or "aunt" etc. I find it also inappropriate to just say "Aye Foolan!" etc. In my backhome that is.... Here you can just call them by their first names. I know in some cultures that is very rude.

I many times speak to older people formally. We don´t usually in my language call them as sir or ma´am but we use T–V distinction. I believe I still use kind of mode of speaking as my parents always teached to me how importand good manners are and choosing your way to speak to others shows to them a respect.

I do..................... in my head

Funnily enough, if a teenager called someone 'sir' or 'ma'am' in my part of the UK they would consider it a sign of bad attitude and sarcasm.

Never lol. I have only seen the household servants use these words. I call adults by their first name if I know them or their last name if I don't. Or by their degree qualifications if I am still formal.

In here need to be carefull when talk formally to older people. Some may take it as offence and think I am thinking that they are very old. As I now am working with senior people, I try to avoid kind of formally way to talk to be polite.

Quite strange of my mind; need to avoid polite way to talk to be a polite.

Bhabha said:

I have only seen the household servants use these words.

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now i understand why i'm the only one who uses it here

In this forum is okay if the youth call me "Ardianto" or "brother Ardianto". But if they meet me in Indonesia, they have to call me "sir" or "uncle". They could call me "brother" only if their age was not far from my age. (I am 48)

In Indonesia, calling older person only by his/her name is considered as inappropriate. How about adult calling other adult?. They can call by his/her name only if they know each other close.

ardianto said:

In this forum is okay if the youth call me "Ardianto" or "brother Ardianto". But if they meet me in Indonesia, they have to call me "sir" or "uncle". They could call me "brother" only if their age was not far from my age. (I am 48)

In Indonesia, calling older person only by his/her name is considered as inappropriate. How about adult calling other adult?. They can call by his/her name only if they know each other close.

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i'll call you sir ardianto,although you're not very older than me:hahayou're only 6 years older than thrice my age) it'll make you feel like home

this is happening in pakistan too. uncles and aunties everywhere . it was weird at first but i got used to it.

When my parents were kids, here too it was politely to call older people as aunts and uncles. If now someone would do so, everybody would only think that kind of person has strange manners.

Assalaamu alaikum,


Mmm... we use "Sir" and "Ma'am" here in Canada when we want to be formal and respectful to someone we don't know, usually in a professional capacity. For instance, a police officer or a first responder will use "sir" or "ma'am" to the persons they are addressing (a potential criminal or a patient, for instance). But otherwise, we don't usually use it.

We tend to prefer to call people by their first names. Even Prime Ministers (except if we don't like them)! When being more formal, we might say "Mr" or "Ms" and their last name. But we tend to be fairly informal much of the time.

As for servants... this is very badly seen here. No one is considered a servant. We just have different professions. And therefore, we are more or less equal (there are professions that we tend to value more than others, so not complete equality). And a nanny (a child care professional) could be called "Ma'am" by a police officer, just as much as a doctor could be. Or a politician. Or a musician. Or a person providing a cleaning service.

(smile) The world is a rather diverse place, isn't it?


May Allah, the Creator, Help us to see the wisdom and beauty of our diversity.

I have never heard of this calling people "uncle" or "aunt" thing. Weird lol Seems rude to me.

crimsontide06 said:

I have never heard of this calling people "uncle" or "aunt" thing. Weird lol Seems rude to me.

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Really bro? That is so strange, I cannot speak for other cultures but in Asian culture, if there is an adult who is your parents age or older, it is expected to call them 'uncle' or 'aunty'. Calling them by their first names, unless they specifically say, is considered so rude. Even with strangers, in a social gathering if you meet an older person for the first time they become a honorary relative .

Although, once I called someone aunty who was my mother's age (mid-thirties) and she was offended It is the sad fact that once you hit thirty you are an aunty to most teenagers and younger kids.

Here, when in a formal setting with an adult that you are not really close with, it is expected that you call them "Mr" or "Ms". Then when you respond to them with a yes or no, you say "Yes ma'am/sir" or "no ma'am/sir". In the U.S it would be seen as extremely rude to call them uncle or aunt...you might as well slapped them in the face..

noraina said:

Really bro? That is so strange, I cannot speak for other cultures but in Asian culture, if there is an adult who is your parents age or older, it is expected to call them 'uncle' or 'aunty'. Calling them by their first names, unless they specifically say, is considered so rude. Even with strangers, in a social gathering if you meet an older person for the first time they become a honorary relative .

Although, once I called someone aunty who was my mother's age (mid-thirties) and she was offended It is the sad fact that once you hit thirty you are an aunty to most teenagers and younger kids.

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