How should I get married?

[Mustafa16]

When I get out of college, I want to ask a girl's wali if I can marry her, but he's hanafi, so don't I not need his permission? the girl used to be my friend as a child....i want to write letters to her, but should I avoid writing lovey dovey stuff in the letters? what should I include and what should I exclude? how do I get over my fear of talking to her wali?

[BilalKid]

pray istikhara 1st :shade:

[s.ali123]

pray istikhara 1st :shade:

Do istikhhara pray first. Then tell your parents that you want to talk to her parents. After your parents dont have a problem, then go and ask her wali for her hand (with the girl :P), and that you want to talk to her whether she want the same or not. Ask his permission to discuss topics with her for marriage. If she is interested in marrying, and they are simple and straightforward people, I dont think there will be any issue in shaa Allah. But I dont think you should write lovey dovey letter first. Even if you want to write something, write something straightforward that how you know or saw her, and that you want to meet her parents to ask permission to discuss things with you in person :)
May Allah help you bro!

[s.ali123]

Oh and also learn more about marriage topics etc and what things you should discuss or ask. You may find many websites with important things which we should ask clearly before marriage.

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[Hamza :)]

You need to talk to the wali
:sl:

[BilalKid]

May Allah help you bro!

the OP ^o) not me ;D ;D

[Mustafa16]

Do istikhhara pray first. Then tell your parents that you want to talk to her parents. After your parents dont have a problem, then go and ask her wali for her hand (with the girl :P), and that you want to talk to her whether she want the same or not. Ask his permission to discuss topics with her for marriage. If she is interested in marrying, and they are simple and straightforward people, I dont think there will be any issue in shaa Allah. But I dont think you should write lovey dovey letter first. Even if you want to write something, write something straightforward that how you know or saw her, and that you want to meet her parents to ask permission to discuss things with you in person :)
May Allah help you bro!

but how am i to marry her if she lives far away, in another U.S. state? I live in georgia, she lives in florida

[Mustafa16]

Do istikhhara pray first. Then tell your parents that you want to talk to her parents. After your parents dont have a problem, then go and ask her wali for her hand (with the girl :P), and that you want to talk to her whether she want the same or not. Ask his permission to discuss topics with her for marriage. If she is interested in marrying, and they are simple and straightforward people, I dont think there will be any issue in shaa Allah. But I dont think you should write lovey dovey letter first. Even if you want to write something, write something straightforward that how you know or saw her, and that you want to meet her parents to ask permission to discuss things with you in person :)
May Allah help you bro!

should I write letters back and forth as a means of getting to know her, or should I use skype, WhatsApp, facetime, etc.? I prefer letters