Dear brothers and sisters can you please spare precious time and answer these following questions I am doing research your cooperation will be highly appreciated.Reply
1. Recent survey reports suggest that cases of forced marriages are increasing in Pakistan, in your opinion what could be reason for this phenomenon?
2. Western Feminist/woman’s right activist may label arranged marriages phenomenon as forced marriage, what’s your take on this?
3 Do you think that a patriarchal interpretation of Islamic laws regarding marriage is problematic for women?
4. Marriage without the consent of Wali/Guardian is considered as invalid except Hanafi school of thought what’s your opinion about this case?
5.Why it is important for Women to marry with consent of guardian
6.why forced marriage cases are reported in Pakistani immigrant community in western countries?:nervous:
05-05-2016, 08:58 AM
the kuffaar will always try to put us down,
personally I wouldn't waste my time trying to explain / justify to them certain aspects of deen without their embracement of islam.
05-05-2016, 10:30 AM
1. I don't know whether forced marriages are increasing these days or not. But yeah they always existed, and they still do. The more important question is whether they are Islamic, or more kind of cultural that region. My take on this is that it is cultural, as it is even practiced by people of many other faith in that region like hindus. And even if I suppose that it is increasing, I would ultimately pin point it towards the lack of education in society, and awareness of women's role in society. People don't even know how to treat women in terms of Islam. And even those who bother to look into Islam for women right, they only adapt opinions which suit their culture rather than based on strong evidence. One practical example of this is the absence of praying area for women in majority of mosques. Many families consider women to be burden on their shoulder, which can be only be relieved when they get married. So in my opinion, I would pin point at lack of deeper Islamic understanding and education.Reply
2. I think feminist/ women's activist have to be clear in their definition of arranged marriage, and what are the best alternative they propose. If by "arranged" they mean that the children parents found potential spouse and the boy and girl never talked before getting married, then "yes" some Pakistani families practice that but it is not what Islam instructs us to do. On the other hand if they say that the solution to this is that the boy and girl should live together before getting married, then I would say that is also wrong, as their is no guarentee that they will stay together for forever, even Islamically it is forbidden.
Secondly even the marriages that are purely "arranged" by parents (by the definition I mentioned above), is not in many cases forced one. My own sister got married in that manner and she was not forced. Rather the proposal was there and both agreed but they did not talk before marriage (But I don't support this idea).
3. Obviously they are. And you will find many cases where women are humiliated by it. And saying that some "interpretation" in like that, does not make it correct one. We always have to see everything according to hadith and scholarly opinion from good scholars. Otherwise you can find anything that suit your mind from some fatwa of some scholar here and there. Like you can even find fatwa which says that women should not be taught how to write otherwise they may write love letters to someone. In another occasion I asked from a madarsa about a divorce case where husband had given divorce to wife. The madarsa scholar told me that the woman will have to do "halala". That is some random man will do nikkah with her, and then have sex with her, and then next day give divorce and then she can marry her old husband. Now even though this is a fatwa, but this is totally baseless and patriarchal, and even goes against hadith.
4-5. For me involving some responsible person for marriage has always been the case, especially someone who wants the good for the spouses. This rule should be more focused for girl as often she is the one who faces many injustices. Take the example that even in west the marriage "has" to be registered in front of a magistrate etc. The reason is that in case there is something wrong done in marriage, so proper witnesses etc can be called. In Islam this precaution is even more strict specially for the girl. And this is just for the protection of the girl. Because it is explicitly mentioned that for marriage her consent is compulsory. While as for the father, since he is the closest one who would want best for her, so he is also involved in this matter. But if the wali or father, becomes unreasonable, or stop her from a marriage without any reason, then Islamically he looses his position, and someone else acts on his behalf, who is more closer to wanting the best for the girl, which usually is considered the nearest Imam.
6. I am not from immigrant family, so I cannot answer this one. But yes I am Pakistani :)
I hope that helped. Salam Alaikum
Originally Posted by shaw
Can't speak on that as I'm not from there but, over here in the west, marriage is not looked at the same way as it used to be in a lot of cases. More people are willing to be in long term relationships vs making it official and getting married. Those who do get married treat it as some high school relationship where when they first get into an argument, they end the marriage and get a divorce, whether they have kids or not and start seeing other people. Maybe in Pakistan, people have the same views about marriage as the people here do and parents/family members are moving towards forced marriages? I don't have any stats to back this up. It's simply my opinion
Also, is an arranged marriage really a forced marriage? Being forced to get married and wanting to get married and having it arranged for you are two different things imo..
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