PDA

View Full Version : Help help help, my life is in trouble.



sc100mr1
05-28-2016, 07:18 PM
Assalam o Alekum

I am 29 years old male, got married around a year and a half, i have one kid. Living in Saudi Arabia.

Now back to the problem.

I am from a very noble family, and we have a very good image in the village. Back in around 2006, a boy attached to me, he is around 8 years older than me
He is from a bad family, his father and brothers all have bad image, always fighting with others and they have no social life. This boy is also in the same category and even worse than his brothers and father. But at first I didn't realized the situation. I never wanted to attach with him, but he always forced me. I always had a fear if I say something he will beat me and it will be a shame in my village.

So till now 10 years have passed and I am still with him, I am managing but its very very difficult for me to live with him. He loves me because of my good looks and always forcing me to stay with him. Although he takes care of me alot, but he is very very bad in habits. I am so much frustrated from him that if I want to kill him, but the problem is Islam forbids it.

I want to get rid of him as soon as possible, but I don't find a way. I wanted to give him slow poison but again its forbidden in Islam.

Please suggest me anything that I can do legally to get rid of him.

Jazak Allah
Reply

Login/Register to hide ads. Scroll down for more posts
sister herb
05-28-2016, 08:10 PM
deleted - misunderstanding the meaning of the previous post
Reply

*charisma*
05-28-2016, 08:13 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
. He loves me because of my good looks and always forcing me to stay with him.
Is the guy gay?? It's very confusing what you wrote. Do you speak Arabic?
Reply

muslimah_B
05-28-2016, 08:33 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
Assalam o Alekum

I am 29 years old male, got married around a year and a half, i have one kid. Living in Saudi Arabia.

Now back to the problem.

I am from a very noble family, and we have a very good image in the village. Back in around 2006, a boy attached to me, he is around 8 years older than me
He is from a bad family, his father and brothers all have bad image, always fighting with others and they have no social life. This boy is also in the same category and even worse than his brothers and father. But at first I didn't realized the situation. I never wanted to attach with him, but he always forced me. I always had a fear if I say something he will beat me and it will be a shame in my village.

So till now 10 years have passed and I am still with him, I am managing but its very very difficult for me to live with him. He loves me because of my good looks and always forcing me to stay with him. Although he takes care of me alot, but he is very very bad in habits. I am so much frustrated from him that if I want to kill him, but the problem is Islam forbids it.

I want to get rid of him as soon as possible, but I don't find a way. I wanted to give him slow poison but again its forbidden in Islam.

Please suggest me anything that I can do legally to get rid of him.

Jazak Allah

I dont understand, you say your a male, and your still with this "brother" 10 years later and he likes you for your good looks?

Your married and have a kid ? And you live with him ?

Im sorry but im totally lost as to the story
Reply

Welcome, Guest!
Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up
sister herb
05-28-2016, 08:35 PM
Did you mean you are living with him in the same house or in the same village? Please clarify if you want that anyone can advice you at all.
Reply

sc100mr1
05-29-2016, 05:41 AM
I can't tolerate it anymore. He likes me but I don't like him. He always tries to force me to do the bad things like kissing etc which I don't want at all. He is a "gay"... Hope that clarifies...

Originally Posted by sister herb
Salam alaykum

You should shame yourself - your friend loves and admires you and you think and plan bad for him. And you claim that you are from the "noble family" (who might have some manners).

Grown an adult, brother. If situation is very annoying to you, remember that the life is a test and as this might be part of your test, you just have to learn how to handle your anger and frustration. And grow up wiser and more tolerant person.

:readquran:
Reply

sc100mr1
05-29-2016, 05:41 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*
Is the guy gay?? It's very confusing what you wrote. Do you speak Arabic?
Yeah he is a "gay"
Reply

sc100mr1
05-29-2016, 05:43 AM
Originally Posted by sister herb
Did you mean you are living with him in the same house or in the same village? Please clarify if you want that anyone can advice you at all.
Originally Posted by muslimah_B
I dont understand, you say your a male, and your still with this "brother" 10 years later and he likes you for your good looks?

Your married and have a kid ? And you live with him ?

Im sorry but im totally lost as to the story

He is a gay, I am not living with him, but our houses are closer to each other and we have to meet every day. If I don't meet him 2 or 3 times a day, he would beat me. The situation is very frustrating.
Reply

Insignificant
05-29-2016, 05:57 AM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
He is a gay, I am not living with him, but our houses are closer to each other and we have to meet every day. If I don't meet him 2 or 3 times a day, he would beat me. The situation is very frustrating.
Brother - man up (be a man), he is a shayathine. Go get more brothers and get the authorities onto the problem or take it out into the street and let the real men beat him.

You will either be treated like a donkey by this shayathine, or you will fear your Rabb more than if you don't stand up for al-Haqq
Reply

muslimah_B
05-29-2016, 09:57 AM
Brother you said you live in saudi, and you havent gotten the police involved is this not an offence over there (im pretty sure its a punishable offence) ? it especially is to Allah.

I would suggest you stop being fragile and if he goes to beat you, you defend yourself and beat him back, if you are from a noble family like you say then people would come to your aid and help you. Why would you allow another man to do these things to you ?
you have a wife and daughter brother you need to grow a backbone, what if he decides to start beating them ?
Reply

*charisma*
05-29-2016, 10:44 AM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
He is a gay, I am not living with him, but our houses are closer to each other and we have to meet every day. If I don't meet him 2 or 3 times a day, he would beat me. The situation is very frustrating.
Brother, I think the best thing to do is to seek the police and discuss with him the details of this situation because it's very serious. I also think that you should force the other man to leave you alone immediately. I don't know if you are also gay, but this isn't fair on your wife and child, and it's also one of the biggest sins in Islam. Homosexuality spreads diseases and I hope your wife did not catch any from you.
Reply

muslimah_B
05-29-2016, 10:49 AM
Originally Posted by *charisma*

Brother, I think the best thing to do is to seek the police and discuss with him the details of this situation because it's very serious. I also think that you should force the other man to leave you alone immediately. I don't know if you are also gay, but this isn't fair on your wife and child, and it's also one of the biggest sins in Islam. Homosexuality spreads diseases and I hope your wife did not catch any from you.
Sis somehow i feel this situation may not actually be true, i mean using the word "frustrating" after being "forced" to do these things is a bit hmmmmmm... also a man allowing himself to be touched or whatever by another man and not defending oneself of going to the police or having people in the village handle the matter when it first began as he is from a noble family,,,, its just a bit beyond my brain power.

I mean do you think this could be true ?


May Allah forgive me if this is true and i have said wrong, but this situation seems a bit "hmmmmm"
Reply

Scimitar
05-29-2016, 10:59 AM
report him to the Saudi Police, explain that he made advances on you - and let the law deal with the man.

I been to KSA twice, and both times I saw gay advances and it made me sick to the stomach. The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has a MASSIVE homosexuality problem.

Scimi
Reply

muslimah_B
05-29-2016, 11:19 AM
Originally Posted by Timi Scar
report him to the Saudi Police, explain that he made advances on you - and let the law deal with the man.

I been to KSA twice, and both times I saw gay advances and it made me sick to the stomach. The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has a MASSIVE homosexuality problem.

Scimi
Do you mean like openly in the street where everyone can see [emoji33] [emoji40]

I always wanted to go to these places, but somethings are just off putting about them
Reply

Scimitar
05-29-2016, 11:36 AM
Openly yes, in 1993 I was 17/18 and I went for Umrah with family.

In Makkah, I made a friend with a Nigerian man who was selling those Zam Zam water drums on the ring road surrounding Masjid al Haram. I used to chat to him every day in between salaah, and watch him work. He worked hard, poor fella.

One day he was busy serving customers and I was waiting for him to finish, when a white cab pulled up next to me. The window opens and a bearded religious looking man starts to speak to me in Arabic and he shows me a big wad of money which he is waving at me. I simply didn't know what he was asking me, so I returned with "Laa arbi, fi maafi mushkil". At this point, the Nigerian brother notices i'm having a problem understanding this Arab dude, so he intervenes. Words are excahnged, then something absolutely crazy happened.

The Nigerian brother started to shout at the Arab cab driver and the driver tried to drive away but teh Nigerian was kicking his car door in and throwing a fit. Within seconds the undercover police are there pointing guns and two uniformed police are pointing rifles at the Nigerians head.

I tried to get inbetween but the Nigerian shoved me to the side and the police held me back. The Nigerian was shouting at the police, pointing to the kaaba and from what I can guess - he was saying he was ready to die here right in front of the kaaba as God is his witness to what that Arab had just attempted to do quite literally on the road that surrounds the masjid al haram.

When it all died down, the Nigerian told me to go back to the hotel. I tried to ask him what the cab driver wanted but he refused to tell me.

I went back to my hotel and stayed ther til salaah time.

Next day i went to him and asked him what happened. He told me it was not safe to speak there and to come meet him by the cafe we used to drink laban at after 6 pm.

So I went to met him. He was already there. He told me that the Arab cab driver had tried to buy me for the night.

I was totally broken by his statement.... at first I refused to believe him. But he was not interested. All he kept repeating was how he wanted to make enough money to go back home to his family. He was slowly reaching tears. And he was angry with me for just being there. The poor man was frustrated beyond hope, he lived in KSA as an illegal immigrant who would sell zam zam water cans for a pittance only so he could afford a lousy meal every night.

I was starting to lose imaan - fast.

I mean, imagine, here i was, a teen lad from the UK in Arabia, for the first time - to this point i'd never experienced any homosexual advances in my life - even as someone who lives in free city of London - yet here I was in quite possibly the most religious city in te world and right at its crux, the Kaaba, I find myself being approached by so called Muslim with a big beard who wants to "buy me for the night".

Yes, I lost my imaan over that - I tried to keep it as much as I could. But people like that don'd do Islam no favours. It took me many years of being lost in the matrix and only by the mercy of Allah did I manage to get some imaan back.

Now, this is the story I feel like sharing,

What I put a stop to in 2006 was way too adult rated for this place.

......

WHERE IS MAHDI ALAIHIS SALAAM.

Scimi
Reply

Muslim Woman
05-29-2016, 12:18 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
Assalam o Alekum

I am 29 years old male, got married around a year and a half, i have one kid. Living in Saudi Arabia.

Now back to the problem.

I am from a very noble family, and we have a very good image in the village. Back in around 2006, a boy attached to me, he is around 8 years older than me
He is from a bad family, his father and brothers all have bad image, always fighting with others and they have no social life. This boy is also in the same category and even worse than his brothers and father. But at first I didn't realized the situation. I never wanted to attach with him, but he always forced me. I always had a fear if I say something he will beat me and it will be a shame in my village.

So till now 10 years have passed and I am still with him, I am managing but its very very difficult for me to live with him. He loves me because of my good looks and always forcing me to stay with him. Although he takes care of me alot, but he is very very bad in habits. I am so much frustrated from him that if I want to kill him, but the problem is Islam forbids it.

I want to get rid of him as soon as possible, but I don't find a way. I wanted to give him slow poison but again its forbidden in Islam.

Please suggest me anything that I can do legally to get rid of him.

Jazak Allah
:sl:

You are married , from a reputed family , still
Can't find anyone to discuss problem ? Does your
Wife know ?

Refuse to meet him anymore. Threat him that u will
Inform Police.
Reply

Insignificant
05-29-2016, 12:22 PM
Timi, that story made my skin crawl
Reply

BeTheChange
05-29-2016, 12:41 PM
Walaikumasalaam,

You MUST protect yourself and consult with your family members.

Speak with an elderly family member and allow them to intervene and settle the matter IMMEDIATELY.

Your actions will inevitably have a detrimental impact on your family and you must not allow this to continue.

May Allah swt protect you and this ummah from such a dreadful sin Ameen.
Reply

EgyptPrincess
05-29-2016, 01:22 PM
Just lay the smackdown on him




but seriously just threaten to tell the police if he doesn't leave you alone or if the police already know then can you get an injunction against him for harassment or something. Assuming they have this in Saudi.
Reply

sc100mr1
05-29-2016, 02:00 PM
Originally Posted by muslimah_B
Brother you said you live in saudi, and you havent gotten the police involved is this not an offence over there (im pretty sure its a punishable offence) ? it especially is to Allah.


I would suggest you stop being fragile and if he goes to beat you, you defend yourself and beat him back, if you are from a noble family like you say then people would come to your aid and help you. Why would you allow another man to do these things to you ?
you have a wife and daughter brother you need to grow a backbone, what if he decides to start beating them ?



I am sorry I forgot to mention, I am expat here, not Saudi citizen. And he followed me here too by getting the visa.


Originally Posted by muslimah_B
what if he decides to start beating them ?

That is the biggest problem that i can't do anything. Because I want my family, my parents safe. If i take any step, I fear he will threat my family members.




Originally Posted by Timi Scar
report him to the Saudi Police, explain that he made advances on you - and let the law deal with the man.


I been to KSA twice, and both times I saw gay advances and it made me sick to the stomach. The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has a MASSIVE homosexuality problem.


Scimi

I can't involve police in this matter, Saudi police will make a lot of troubles as we are expats.
Reply

*charisma*
05-29-2016, 02:03 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
I can't involve police in this matter, Saudi police will make a lot of troubles as we are expats.
They will not treat you any differently brother, you can even contact the religious police (haia) or your employer, and inshallah they will help you. Don't let this continue.
Reply

Scimitar
05-29-2016, 02:20 PM
get evidence first... film it secretly.
Reply

EgyptPrincess
05-29-2016, 02:46 PM
Originally Posted by Timi Scar
get evidence first... film it secretly.
Film what?! :omg:
Reply

sc100mr1
05-29-2016, 02:56 PM
Originally Posted by Timi Scar
get evidence first... film it secretly.
film what????? are you serious?
Reply

Insignificant
05-29-2016, 03:01 PM
Removed by user
Reply

Muslim Woman
05-29-2016, 03:24 PM
:sl:

Originally Posted by sc100mr1
film what????? are you serious?

I think , yes . We all are serious here . When he threatens u , forcing u , at least try to record his voice - if u can't make the video . Keep his recorded voice as a proof against him .


He is not a Saudi citizen and he is so brave to threat u and u don't have courage to record his voice ? That's silly . U can do it over phone .
Reply

noraina
05-29-2016, 03:36 PM
Assalamu alaykum

Bro, everyone has given you valuable advice, I suggest you act upon it as soon as possible inshaAllah.

You don't deserve this, your wife doesn't deserve this, your child doesn't deserve this. That person is the one who deserves to be punished for threatening and blackmailing you.

You are worth much more then what this man is doing, you have value and dignity. Consult with elders or the authorities - this would so negatively impact yourself and your family.

May Allah swt make everything easy for you.
Reply

Scimitar
05-29-2016, 05:28 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
film what????? are you serious?
:facepalm:

1) You have no witnesses
2) You have no evidence
3) You accusing him wthout any of the above is going to result in the following:

A) You're gonna look like a liar who is accusing his longest and best friend of being an homosexual who is making advances towards you
B) Gonna get 70 lashes for not providing articles 1) and 2)

So may I ask you instead - Are YOU serious?



Scimi
Reply

sc100mr1
05-30-2016, 05:50 AM
But how can I record such shameful activities?
Reply

Alpha Dude
05-30-2016, 07:39 AM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
But how can I record such shameful activities?
How could you have participated in them for so long?

Enough is enough. Put a stop to this against you.
Reply

sc100mr1
06-03-2016, 06:27 PM
Yeah I fear to take action. I just want to kill him. I don't want him to live anymore. He is the worst person in this whole world. :phew
Reply

sc100mr1
06-03-2016, 06:29 PM
Just imagine. If I take any action and it doesn't solve the problem, he will create a lot of troubles for me and my family. I want someone to kill him. I am ready to pay the amount if someone agrees but the problem is, my religion doesn't permit it. am I right?
Reply

Umm Abed
06-03-2016, 06:45 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
Yeah I fear to take action. I just want to kill him. I don't want him to live anymore. He is the worst person in this whole world. :phew
Have somebody with you all the time, give him no opportunity to be alone with you.
Reply

sc100mr1
06-03-2016, 06:46 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Abed
Have somebody with you all the time, give him no opportunity to be alone with you.
How is this possible?
Reply

Umm Abed
06-03-2016, 06:48 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
How is this possible?
Well, at home you are with your family.

Outside the home try to be around people all the time.

Does anyone else know about your situation?
Reply

greenhill
06-03-2016, 06:50 PM
I'd like to think that that is said in anger and total frustration. Killing is, well what to say? Wrong.

Use the nobility to seek advice from authorities and ask them what helps to build the case. Tell them you are sick and tired of this person even being in the country. Generosity towards them might even help your matter along.

:peace:
Reply

Umm Abed
06-03-2016, 07:07 PM
Ever thought of moving places, or even countries?
Reply

sc100mr1
06-03-2016, 07:10 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Abed
Ever thought of moving places, or even countries?
It all started from my home country, than I moved to KSA for my job, after 3 years he followed me here too.
Reply

Umm Abed
06-03-2016, 07:16 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
It all started from my home country, than I moved to KSA for my job, after 3 years he followed me here too.
This must be extremely difficult for you. It would help if you have another person with you just to keep him away.
Reply

sc100mr1
06-03-2016, 07:30 PM
Originally Posted by Umm Abed
This must be extremely difficult for you. It would help if you have another person with you just to keep him away.
Thank u sis,
Its getting more and more annoying from me, and I fear someday i will kill him for sure.
Reply

BeTheChange
06-03-2016, 11:02 PM
Originally Posted by sc100mr1
Thank u sis,
Its getting more and more annoying from me, and I fear someday i will kill him for sure.
Asalamualykum,

You MUST do something brother.

Have you considered the advice from our brothers & sisters on this thread?

What is a realistic action that you can take?

If you kill your fellow Muslim i am sure you are aware it is like you have killed the WHOLE of mankind!! Subhan Allah! Think about the consequences. You will live your whole life in guilt. Do you really want this for yourself & family? Don't be tempted or fooled by the shaytaan.
Reply

al-Andalusi
06-04-2016, 12:35 PM
Do not kill him

Stand your ground and reject his advances outright, and if he tries to harm you physically, do not be afraid to defend yourself. If you truly perceive him as a threat to your safety, get the police involved, I'm sure that if he's trying to get sexual activity from you under coercion the penalty will double with addition of charges for sex crimes.
Reply

Umm Abed
06-05-2016, 05:18 PM
Get really fit and build up, and then stand up to him in confrontation.

He will not take a chance.
Reply

Scimitar
06-15-2016, 04:17 PM
Bloody heck, another hasbara - he would prefer to kill him (a thing which is very tough to even contemplate let alone do) rather than film the guy... you members need to understand HOW HASBARA OPERATE....

>>>I suspect this post will go missing within minutes,

Scimi
Reply

Hey there! Looks like you're enjoying the discussion, but you're not signed up for an account.

When you create an account, you can participate in the discussions and share your thoughts. You also get notifications, here and via email, whenever new posts are made. And you can like posts and make new friends.
Sign Up

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 29
    Last Post: 10-15-2008, 12:55 PM
  2. Replies: 9
    Last Post: 07-03-2007, 12:50 AM
  3. Replies: 25
    Last Post: 03-11-2007, 04:22 PM
  4. Replies: 4
    Last Post: 01-06-2006, 01:40 PM
HeartHijab.com | Hijab Sale | Pound Shop | International Institute of Entrepreneurship and Professional Development - IIEPD | Truly Halal Humour

IslamicBoard

Experience a richer experience on our mobile app!