View Full Version : Write your own news
sister herb
07-23-2016, 02:36 PM
I got an idea from this post:
format_quote Originally Posted by
Ineed Umar
Sigh every morning I wake up with bad news.
Hopefully I will hear theSE headlines soon.
SYRIA CIVIL WAR OVER.
DAESH RESIGNS CALIPHATE ADMITS TO TRUE ISLAM
MUSLIM PREVENTS SHOOTING
ISRAEL PALESTINE PEACE
DONALD TRUMP RESIGNS.
http://www.islamicboard.com/world-af...ml#post2917925
As we always have to read mostly bad news, write your own news headlines about happy news. There never can´t have too much of them.
Let me start:
Islam spreads rapidly - Majority of Europeans are considering to revert
July 23, 2016 - Herb International News
Hunger is finally destroyed from the world - no child will die of starvation
July 23, 2016 - S.Herb News Agency
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muslimah_B
07-23-2016, 03:32 PM
*the worlds elite 1% are finally rounded up and thrown into snake Island*
MuslimahB Global press reports
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 03:40 PM
:salam:
"Breaking news: we can now teleport to whatever Island we want! Read more"
Serinity's Global Tech report
Reply
strivingobserver98
07-23-2016, 03:55 PM
Anonymous report reveals Farhan didn't leave IB, he was the secret owner all this time!
Herb International News
Reply
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sister herb
07-23-2016, 04:08 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
muslimah_B
*the worlds elite 1% are finally rounded up and thrown into snake Island*
MuslimahB Global press reports
Special report: Herb´s International Aviation Association offers free flights for the worlds elite
Herb´s Magazine
Bon voyage!
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 04:15 PM
:salam:
Serinity newspaper reports: 20 people saved from a violent monster, which emerged from the ground in the afternoon, reports say that it was 5 meters tall!
read more!
Serinity's Newspaper.
lol at my reporting skills.
Reply
LaSorcia
07-23-2016, 04:17 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
muslimah_B
*the worlds elite 1% are finally rounded up and thrown into snake Island*
MuslimahB Global press reports
That made me laugh out loud.
So did Serenity's post above.
Reply
LaSorcia
07-23-2016, 04:20 PM
People of the Book All Get Along and Unite Against Evil in the World!
Reply
LaSorcia
07-23-2016, 04:21 PM
Billionaire Donates All Their Money to Open World's Largest Playground For Children: Free For Everyone.
Reply
LaSorcia
07-23-2016, 04:28 PM
Donald Trump Finds Faith In God!
He has started a campaign for world-wide nuclear disarmament.
Edit- I should have added: It's a miracle!
Reply
noraina
07-23-2016, 04:28 PM
Latest technology allow fruits, especially strawberries, to grow all year round whatever the season, to the delight of all.
Noraina Daily
Reply
noraina
07-23-2016, 04:31 PM
The niqab ban is lifted from all places and is well on its way to becoming an accepted and welcome sight on streets.
Noraina Daily.
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 04:33 PM
BREAKING NEWS: Fruit control Company has now started inspecting company's fruit quality! Reports say that the company intends to rid off all harmful chemicals! Read more
Global Health and wellbeing association - GHWA!
Reply
sister herb
07-23-2016, 05:46 PM
These our own news put me to smile and believe they really are true. The world feels safer place already.
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 06:01 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
I got an idea from this post:
http://www.islamicboard.com/world-af...ml#post2917925
As we always have to read mostly bad news, write your own news headlines about happy news. There never can´t have too much of them.
Let me start:
Islam spreads rapidly - Majority of Europeans are considering to revert
July 23, 2016 - Herb International News
Hunger is finally destroyed from the world - no child will not die of starvation
July 23, 2016 - S.Herb News Agency
you made a mistake. It is "no child will die of starvation" what you said is like saying "children will die of starvation" Cuz if you say no child will NOT die, you say EVERY child will die.
Reply
muslimah_B
07-23-2016, 07:09 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
you made a mistake. It is "no child will die of starvation" what you said is like saying "children will die of starvation" Cuz if you say no child will NOT die, you say EVERY child will die.
She made a whoopsie lol
Reply
sister herb
07-23-2016, 07:53 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
you made a mistake. It is "no child will die of starvation" what you said is like saying "children will die of starvation" Cuz if you say no child will NOT die, you say EVERY child will die.
Now in the headlines: S.Herb News Agency won the lawsuit againts Google Translator because of the poor translation
Herb Magazine
Reply
muslimah_B
07-23-2016, 08:05 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
Now in the headlines: S.Herb News Agency won the lawsuit againts Google Translator because of the poor translation
Herb Magazine
Haha that is hilirious ^^^^^^
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 08:42 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
muslimah_B
Haha that is hilirious ^^^^^^
Headlines:_Muslimah_B's Magazine loses 2$ billion dollars for a traumatic mistake, what will be of her business? Reports say that she wrote "hilirious" instead of "hilarious", will she go bankrupt?!
Serinity Magazine Reply
muslimah_B
07-23-2016, 09:00 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
Headlines:_Muslimah_B's Magazine loses 2$ billion dollars for a traumatic mistake, what will be of her business? Reports say that she wrote "hilirious" instead of "hilarious", will she go bankrupt?!
Serinity Magazine
*Breaking news* serinity magazine tycoon c.e.o Serinity has just been confirmed as kidnapped, as to who and why is still under speculation, no ransom note has been sent so far, for further updates on this breaking story stay tuned to
Muslimahb global news
Reply
sister herb
07-23-2016, 09:29 PM
Special news report: Serinity has founded in good condition
He was found in the basement of Muslimah_B's Magazine´s headquarters, eating sister Herb´s world famous cherry pie and reading the book named "No more spelling mistakes in English language".
Our reporters will follow the situation.
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 09:35 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
Special news report: Serinity has founded in good condition
Breaking NEWS: Herb's magazine charged with 2.9 billion dollars for forgetting a word! Reports say that she forgot to write "been" before "founded" so that it is "Been founded".
Anonymous Serinity Magazine.
Reply
sister herb
07-23-2016, 09:45 PM
:hiding: These were supposed to be good news...
imsad
Reply
muslimah_B
07-23-2016, 09:49 PM
Breaking news
C.e.o of Serinity magazine has somehow ended up on snake Island, could this somehow be payback, or a cruel joke, details are sketchy at best.
Muslimah_B global news reporting
Reply
Akhi_Umar
07-23-2016, 09:53 PM
BREAKING NEWS:
Read Post #2
*Slowly Claps*
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 09:56 PM
Special news: there was 2 minor earthquakes near Snake Island, reports say that the Anonymous aviation has delayed flights in favor of Serinity. Ships are at halt. Serinity is starving in Snake Island.
Anonymous Magazine.
Reply
sister herb
07-23-2016, 10:11 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
Special news: there was 2 minor earthquakes near Snake Island, reports say that the Anonymous aviation has delayed flights in favor of Serinity. Ships are at halt. Serinity is starving in Snake Island.
Anonymous Magazine.
Special interview from snake Island: Original inhabitants of snake Island are finally happy: "World elite was a tasty meal, new teleport shipments are welcomed"
Snake Magazine
Reply
Serinity
07-23-2016, 10:55 PM
Breaking news: A new portal has been found, scientists assume that it leads to a new dimension!
Headline: A Billionaire donated 20 billion dollars to Orphanages! And the businesses who refused, their stock market-value went down by a mindblowing 60%!
Read more!
HEADLINE - SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: IT has been reported that a crew of tech savys went to see to be pirates! WHAT WILL HAPPEN NOW? They got 20% of the whole military base! Source of these goods are unknown! experts are still investigating.
Serinity World Magazine.
Reply
sister herb
08-06-2016, 11:24 AM
The forecast for today: Sun is shining! :D
The Herb News
Reply
Abz2000
08-06-2016, 01:08 PM
26 billion people turned up to watch the latest jason bourne movie, early reports indicate that due to the number of vacant seats left unused, organizers contracted with prisons and mental hospitals to bring busloads of people in jumpsuits and pyjamas to give halls a lively atmosphere. Organizers and prison and hospital authorities deny allegations of wrongdoing despite sawn off handcuffs and straight jackets being found all over the floors of every cinema hall in america, officials are yet to give an accurate head-count of remaining patients and prisoners and instead are offering to provide an online digital count .
Stay tuned for updates.
Reply
sister herb
08-06-2016, 01:44 PM
^^ Popcorns sold out! :popcorn:
Corn farmer´s News
Reply
Serinity
08-06-2016, 02:00 PM
:salam:
50 people dead in a meteorite crash on a distant rural village. It is said that there are 4 survivers, 14 injured, and 50 dead! In total 68 causalties! Click here to know more.
Causality news report!
Reply
sister herb
08-06-2016, 02:14 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
:salam:
50 people dead in a meteorite crash on a distant rural village. It is said that there are 4 survivers, 14 injured, and 50 dead! In total 68 causalties! Click here to know more.
Causality news report!
Can you read the text written by red color?
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
As we always have to read mostly bad news, write your own news headlines about happy news. There never can´t have too much of them.
If yes, please, read it again! Happy news - only happy news! "Reports" of deaths are not happy news!!!!
:/:
Reply
Serinity
08-06-2016, 04:19 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
Can you read the text written by red color?
If yes, please, read it again! Happy news - only happy news! "Reports" of deaths are not happy news!!!!
:/:
I see.
MORE NEWS:
The meteorite strike is composed of 47% iron, 25% nickle, 2% Copper, 1% Gold, 12% Titanium, 0.8% Platinum, 0.2% Tin, 0.2% Lithium, 0.5% Uranium, and 11.3% of Rock.
The weight is: 25 tons! I.e. 25000 Kg
Chemistry's news report. Reply
sister herb
08-06-2016, 07:55 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Serinity
I see.
Then, show some respect for the meaning of this thread - or open your own thread for other kind of news.
Reply
strivingobserver98
08-07-2016, 12:19 AM
@sister herb and
@Umm Abed
deliver powerful keynote speech at Islamic Knowledge conference 2020! Reply
Search
08-07-2016, 01:37 AM
:bism: (In the Name of God, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful)
:sl: (Peace be upon you)
Breaking News: Farhan has emerged from his hiatus on IB to the sounds of ringing joy and celebration of IB members.
Search's News Report. Stay tuned for more...
:wa: (And peace be upon you)
format_quote Originally Posted by
farhan
@sister herb and @Umm Abed deliver powerful keynote speech at Islamic Knowledge conference 2020!
Reply
sister herb
02-06-2017, 08:12 PM
Trump surprised again: We don´t need walls!
Herb Magazine
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Finding MEMO
02-07-2017, 09:03 PM
A new craze has broken riot across London..
People participating in the 'Mannequin Challenge' are now taking this craze to a new height of hysteria.
People are revolutionising the act of freezing in mid action by attempting to not laugh when tickled by a giant yellow man dressed as a Minion.
Anyone successfully not moving or laughing wins £100 for their choice of Charity. So far only 3 people out of 256 have succeeded to date.
Thumbs up for the giant Minion near you!
Reply
Aryeh Jay
03-03-2017, 03:57 PM
Breaking News. US President Trump sends a positive message on Twitter.
NFNN (Not Fake News Network)
Reply
Finding MEMO
03-03-2017, 04:10 PM
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 04:24 PM
Removed
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 04:28 PM
Removed
Reply
sister herb
03-03-2017, 04:31 PM
^o) ^ Those belong to the nerd jokes. Please to go the other thread of you think to continue.
Reply
Scimitar
03-03-2017, 04:32 PM
Aleph News Broadcast, Broadcasting banalities bi-weekly,
Our headlines for today :D
American Arsonists And Abortion Clinics
Britains Brexit BS
Candid camera catches casual couples copulating criminally
Double Decker destroys Donald Duck in Disneyland
Eel eating elves, elevate European Union
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 04:33 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
sister herb
^o) ^ Those belong to the nerd jokes. Please to go the other thread of you think to continue.
Sister, i thought you spoke that language also. I am fluent in binary. shall i translate it for you?
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 04:40 PM
Removed
Reply
Finding MEMO
03-03-2017, 04:49 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Simple_Person
@
Scimitar
01010011 01101111 00100000 01101000 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110111 01100001 01110011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01100100 01100001 01111001 00111111
BREAKING NEWS
IB Forum has been hacked!!!
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 04:54 PM
Removed
Reply
Finding MEMO
03-03-2017, 05:10 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Simple_Person
4f 6f 68 20 73 69 73 74 65 72 2c 20 69 20 6e 65 76 65 72 20 6b 6e 65 77 20 79 6f 75 20 61 6c 73 6f 20 73 70 6f 6b 65 20 62 69 6e 61 72 79 20 66 6c 65 75 6e 74 6c 79 2e
(For the NORMAL people on this forum.
http://bfy.tw/AQGQ)
Ooh sister, i never knew you also spoke binary fleuntly.
Bro I don't!
I'm just good at google because I don't understand half the stuff that comes out of my partners mouth.
But...
maybe you should move this thread???
Especially if it's not fitting the intended subject.
Jazak'Allah Khayr
Reply
Simple_Person
03-03-2017, 05:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Finding MEMO
Ooh sister, i never knew you also spoke binary fleuntly.
Bro I don't!
I'm just good at google because I don't understand half the stuff that comes out of my partners mouth.
But...
maybe you should move this thread???
Especially if it's not fitting the intended subject.
Jazak'Allah Khayr
Yeah, i thought so that maybe people would not be happy with those post..
Reply
ardianto
03-03-2017, 05:16 PM
format_quote Originally Posted by
Finding MEMO
BREAKING NEWS
IB Forum has been hacked!!!
Reply
Scimitar
03-03-2017, 05:17 PM
cough up that red pill bro, morpheus wants it back :D
Scimi
Reply
noraina
03-03-2017, 05:31 PM
Planting one fruit, vegetable or herb per household is made compulsory across the UK, to encourage self-sufficiency and independence. (seriously, :D)
And finally, smoking is made illegal as the government realises despite the vast power and profits of the tobacco industry, smoking really does kill.
Reply
All the prominent scholars of different sects of ummah gathered in Ka'aba and vowed to unite this ummah
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