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noraina
09-19-2016, 10:35 AM
Assalamu alaykum,

I've noticed how these days those parents who take that little bit of extra effort are called 'over-protective' or controlling - my own parents have been called so many times.

I wonder what's the definition of over-protectiveness here? Some people seem to hate it and others love it. I feel so loved and protected with them alhamdulillah. My Baba likes to drop me and pick me up from any places I go to, and yes I always ask their permission, and of course being out on your own in the streets after maghrib is a complete no. It's doesn't feel overly-controlling to me. It's protecting your daughters/sisters, which is a duty.

Or for example, my friend has an older brother and whenever we go to the library together he always comes along, and will sit on the table nearby the whole time, and then take us back home - he's protective of his sister and her friends, and we find it sweet, lol. I'll be honest, when I was younger I found it *so* irritating.

Of course, there's a balance. My parents fully respect my privacy and I've never felt suffocated or that I'm being treated with suspicion - I understand some girls face that and it can be horrible - there's a difference between over-protectiveness and interfering.

But, yes, I've been told my parents are over-protective. But aren't they just doing their duty, to take care of their children while they're with them? I've seen with other parents, even those who aren't Muslim, who are made to feel ashamed or controlling because they take that bit of extra care and interest in their children's lives. Like, they're doing their duty, and I will be such a parent inshaAllah ;).
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greenhill
09-19-2016, 10:49 AM
Good that you appreciate it. Your brother, I'm sure would far prefer be doing other things :hmm: but made YOU his priority. How many hours?

I think you should show appreciation :p

(I was assuming things there :facepalm: )

It is duty. I feel the same for my kids. It is a tough job being a parent (talking about self).


:peace:
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noraina
09-19-2016, 11:41 AM
Sadly (or not? lol) I don't have any brothers, he's my best friend's brother. Whenever my friend comes to visit or we go somewhere, it is her brother who is accompanying her - thinking about it, I'm sure a 19-year-old would have more interesting things to do.

The problem is, you don't appreciate these things until it's too late - but better late than never :D.

I do appreciate what my father does though, he's working and a busy man but he's always there to take me wherever I need to go. Alhamdulillah for parents, they do so much for their children.
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M.I.A.
09-19-2016, 12:45 PM
sounds like a blessing.

all praise is due to Allah swt.

...try not to do your parents wrong.


your all kings and princesses really, until you exclude yourselves.
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