Originally Posted by anatolian
In the US, all of the dorms are like this...there are no restrictions to who comes and goes in the dorm rooms. All female dorm rooms means that only girls will be allowed to live there, but it doesn't keep them from having relationships in those dorms or anything like that. So what happens in a situation where her dorm roomate wants to sleep with her boyfriend while she's present? Because this happens. This is how filthy dorms get. No one really keeps it strict either. I have not heard of or seen anything that proves otherwise. However as I said in my previous post, if there's a way which caters to her islamically, then by all means, that's great and she can discuss that with her parents. If she had lived 3 hours away, then the same advice goes there too. She should live somewhere where it is acceptable. She can have her own apartment, or live with muslim girls who are morally sound. There are many options out there than to stay at a filthy dorm room. It does not seem that she has really done the research in regards to how the dorms are controlled or run. So I can't really judge on specifications, but through what I do know for sure, it is not an acceptable living condition. And you're absolutely right about getting exposed to immorality, but that's beyond our control. If we can control it, then that's what we should do.
Originally Posted by anatolian
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Shall I not tell you of the greatest of major sins?” – three times – and we said, “Yes, O Messenger of Allaah.” He said: “Associating others in worship with Allaah, and disobeying one’s parents
,” – and he was reclining, but he sat up and said, “And false speech and false witness.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2654; Muslim, 126.
And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The pleasure of Allaah is in pleasing one’s father and the anger of Allaah is in angering one’s father.”
Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1821; classed as saheeh by Ibn Hibaan and al-Haakim, from the hadeeth of ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘Aas (may Allaah be pleased with him). The version narrated by al-Tabaraani refers to “parents” (instead of “father”). And there are very many ahaadeeth which state that it is obligatory to honour one’s parents and treat them kindly. Source
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents
. His mother bears him with hardship. And she brings him forth with hardship…” [al-Ahqaaf 46:15]
‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr ibn al-‘Aas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) said: “A man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and asked him for permission to participate in jihaad. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to him, ‘Are your parents alive?’ He said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘Then your jihaad is with them.’”
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2842; Muslim, 2549)
It was related by Anas b. Malik that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Seeking knowledge is obligatory upon every Muslim.” [Sunan Ibn Mâjah]
What about the below Hadith?
The Prophet (s) said, “Seek knowledge even in China,”
The proven hadeeth is that which was narrated by Ibn Maajah from the hadeeth of Anas ibn Maalik, who said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Seeking knowledge is obligatory upon every Muslim.’” (220. Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah. What is meant by knowledge here is knowledge of sharee’ah (Islamic knowledge). Al-Thawri said: “It is the knowledge for which no person has any excuse for not knowing.”
The 2nd one is fabricated: https://islamqa.info/en/13637
I do want to point out that her parents don't have a problem with her getting a secular education/going to school/learning, they have a problem with her moving out. So this begs the question--move out to where?? This is what she has to prepare for her argument with them and has to carry some islamic validity since this is what she's searching for. So far the only place she's asking about is the dorms of which she has no experience in and cannot defend.